Starting Chemo June 2017
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Treatment #2 is in the books. Went in at 8:30am and got home a little before 2pm. The treatment itself was uneventful. Um, well not really. I had a visit from Barbie, a therapy dog. That was awesome. I am an animal lover so this was a special treat. My parents are visiting from FL (I am in NY) so my mom was able to come to chemo and get a feel for what is happening. Since my side effects so far have been manageable, hopefully, it eases some of her concerns and she can go home feeling better. At 47, I am still their baby. I have to remind myself of that sometimes. It was nice to include her in the haircut, too. It reminded us of when I was 8 and insisted on getting my very long ponytail cut to get the newly popular Dorothy Hamill short bob. I am sending my hair to wigs for kids.
Ready for a good night's sleep now. I'm definitely feeling the weight on my lids.
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Jeanne, That's wonderful your parents have come to visit. At 49, I wish my parents could travel from GA to IL to get here. My dad's health is not the best, and my mother has a total fear of flying. She does all the driving, and I personally do not want them doing that unless they break up the trip. I am hoping when chemo ends, by October (I pray), that I will feel well enough for them and my brother's family to meet around Thanksgiving. Hope you feel well today and can just enjoy their company and some rest.
I love the idea of a therapy dog. Wish I could take my own with me during treatment.
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MSLin,
I know some time has passed since this post but I'm a couple of months behind you and am always trying to mentally prepare.... Next Wednesday is my 2nd round of DD A/C. Round #1 wasn't bad. Would you say each time the side effects are worse/ more intense?
I hope you are feeling better and are done with the A/C by now
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MSLin,
I know some time as passed since this post but I'm a couple of months behind you and am always trying to mentally prepare.... Next Wednesday is my 2nd round of DD A/C. Round #1 wasn't bad. Would you say each time the side effects are worse/ more intense?
I hope you are feeling better and are done with the A/C by now
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Peachyjenn,
I love that ❤️ I wonder if I could convince them that my 13 year old golden is a therapy dog 😊
How are you doing? I have round 2 of AC this Wednesday and am hoping it's as uneventful as round 1. My daughter flew in for round one and as fiercely independent as I am I can not tell you how wonderful that was. Enjoy your parents and cheers to many more uneventful treatments... I love hearing that
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Well, DD AC #3 done yesterday. I'm having a tough time with the nausea as usual. This time I even gagged in the chemo suite! That was crazy. Even the smell of the hand sanitizer bothered me! But this gets better by day 4 for me.
I finally got my dh to buzz the rest of my hair off. I got tired of using a sticky tape lint roller on my pillows and shirts because of hair shedding. I used hair bands under my hats but my sister suggested a halo if I just want some hair pieces around my sides. Hmm, I'm considering...
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Kimpossible I love your spirit and you look great!! Your post is just what I needed today.
Thanks and yes let's keep smiling 😁
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Hi all: three FECs behind me and this Wed I start tax (3)...looking forward to the finish line! Has anyone had night sweats during FEC or AC? I have had terrible sweats for the past week and think it's hormonal related.
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Thank you all for being so welcoming. I neglected to say this earlier.
Wendeez.... I am a week ahead of you. Round 2 has been ok so far. Today is day 2. Knock wood. I actually felt more spaced out on #1 by this time. I was unsteady on my feet a bit but this time seem better with that. For comparison, on round 1 I would not drive days 1-4. Not comfortable with my dizziness and lack of focus. This round, I feel I could drive without issue.
Treatment 1 I did not take a stool softener early enough so I had some bloat and was uncomfortable from that. I did get my first hemorrhoid. How strange it is to just blurt this stuff out so non-nonchalantly. LOL!! But it is what it is right? I did get some hiccup/burpies.
I have not had too much difficulty eating. Some things do taste just a little off, but nothing that drastic to keep me from eating it. This could be a problem as my friend keeps telling me she wants to fatten me up thinking I'll lose weight. My oncologist nurse told me yesterday that she sees women who gain 10-15 pounds on this treatment. Yoiks...guess all those ice cream runs will have to slow down. I do take the Zofran close to every 8 hours. It says "as needed" every 8 hours but I do not want to even get to the "as needed" place. I had a 'little ribbon' of nausea run through me during treatment 1 when I wasn't sticking to the 8 hours so this time I'm on it.
I go back for my Neulasta shot this afternoon. I took a Claritin yesterday and again this morning. The doctors say there is no medical evidence that it helps prevent bone pain so they don't like to offer that advice but some patients say it does. It can't hurt so I do. I experienced some lower back pain a few days after the shot, but not bad.
Kim...GA to IL is a long haul. Is there an Amtrak route that would bring them somewhere close? I worry about my parents driving as well. They do take an auto train for half the trip which helps. My father is going back to FL to have a procedure on his throat. He is not healthy, so I wonder if they will even go ahead with it. They say they want to come back in Aug for my bday, but I've told my mom I'd like to play that by ear. The fatigue is supposed it increase and Aug 17 will be my first dose of Tax so I won't know how that will make me feel. It's hard to say "don't come" as my dad will take it as rejection. But I worry about them driving and honestly, having extra people stay with me is not always the best. Sometimes you just want your space and peace.
I asked what it takes to get a dog into therapy. Apparently it's not terribly difficult. Obviously they need to respond to command and not be aggressive. No barking, and not bothered by the hospital surroundings. There isn't even a need to be shed free. I'm sure if you google it in your area, you may be able to get your 13 year old enrolled. The woman who owns Barbie is a cancer survivor herself. She knows the lift the visits bring.
Smiling Wife, I'm sorry you are suffering from the nausea. Wonder if there is something you can rub under your nose to help with the smells. Maybe a scented cream that isn't too strong and doesn't make you gag would help. I'm thinking Vicks but that may be worse than the hand sanitizer. Nothing to lose getting the halo wig. I considered ChemoDiva halo wig which could be made from my own hair but in the end went with a full wig I am donating my hair. Hang in there!!
Sorry for the long-winded post. Wishing all of you a good day!
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PeachyJeann, thanks for the suggestions! I even thought of wearing a mask but with a drop of an essential oil that I can tolerate. So far I like peppermint oil and a combination of oils called breathe. I feel like I'm pregnant minus the excitement.
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Went in for my 2nd TC round yesterday; will come back for Nuelasta shot this afternoon but with 1/2 dose compared to the auto-injection device. MO told me the auto-injection dose is a one-size fit all weight, and I'm 122 lbs so 1/2 dose should work fine. I hope that would deplete some bone pain & histamine that Nuelasta done me in round 1. "PeachyJeanie", Claritin helps to relieve symptoms from the histamine such as sinus pressure, ear pressure etc, not bone pain so much.
My DH gave me a buzzed cut last Monday, first few seconds was hard as there were my tears mixing with the falling salt/pepper hairs; but I did strengthen my resolve, said a few prayers and remember the inspired "Invictus" poem. On the positive side, I now use less H2O for washing..LOL, saving the planet 1 droplet at a time....
Here is my 1/2 head shot, at least my eyebrows are still in tact for now, and DH said I have a strong forehead (I said it was due to deep thinking on my part).
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Ugh it's happening just like they said. I'm post chemo day #14 and hair is falling out in clumps. Last night in bed I noticed my hair was hurting but thought maybe it's because I was wearing it in a hat and ponytail earlier in the day. Nope! I showered and while rinsing I couldn't stop getting it tangled in my hands. And when i looked down i gasped. I dried my hair and styled it since we are going out to dinner. I read some of your posts where you felt empowered by shaving your head and I just don't think im one of those people. I'm going to have a major breakdown . Its just hair, thats what my husband says but oh how I love my hair!
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Went for lab work yesterday. Nurse was actually impressed with my WB count. It had gone down but still within a normal range. Was suppose to get second round of chemo today but there's too many people getting it and they had to reschedule for tomorrow morning at 9:15 am. Not a good sign when there's more and more people with cancer.
On a brighter side apparently I've lost 8 lbs. Not sure where that went but I'll take it. I guess that's what exercise and healthy eating does for us.
Yikes! Also Not a morning person. Unfortunately we don't get to say when or which room or which nurses. However, tomorrow is on the fourth floor with windows over looking the city. I guess that's compensation for having to be there so early. Now if I could just keep my eyes open...
Also visited the wig shop. I thought I looked bad enough with no hair but the wigs look even worse. Must have tried on half a dozen. Even the wig gal said I look better without one. I finally settled on the best of the worst. Probably won't wear it. Baseball hats it is.
Asked the nurse about expecting the same side effects for the second go round. She said no guarantee. Could be the same, could be worse. Hmmm. Let's be positive and expect the same.
Positive thoughts and no side effects for everyone this week.
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PeachyJeanne,
Sooooo glad to hear (knock on wood) so far so good on round 2. Too funny discussing constipation but seriously that was a huge concern of mine after reading up on side effects... I loaded up on everything that I saw recommended. Day 2 after round one I found only one thing worked and that was smooth moves tea. None of the other over the counter products worked at all. You might want to give that a try. 😁 BTW I also didn't feel comfortable driving after round one so that will be interesting to see.
Thank you hopefully... for my glance into the future. Let's stay positive
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HapB I'm glad you know exactly how I feel. It sucks. I'm sure you will look good in a scarf too. As for dating don't worry about that now! It will happen for you when its meant to be!
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Susie: I thought I'd be okay with going bald. Turns out not so much! I'm not shaving either although it is within half inch. Every day I lose more and more. If I don't look in the mirror I'm okay. If it's any consolation we're all in the same boat with no hair. It's devastating for sure. It changes you in ways you never expect. My hairdresser says to keep it for as long as you can.
It's a loss. Every loss needs time to grieve. When it starts to grow back we'll be happy.
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Wendeez - the effects of the AC are cumulative so each one was a little rougher than the one before. #3 was the worst for me so I'm super nervous about #4. I met with the MO yesterday and she and the nurses are all doing what they can to keep me calm and reassuring me. Their suggestion was to take 1/2 an Ativan before infusion today, but it makes me so tired I opted to just go without. My advice is to take the anti-nausea meds and know that it is ok to just rest. The fatigue is rough, but sleeping is your body's way of healing. Now if I could only convince myself of that.
Pink - Oh how I wish I'd lost 8 pounds. I asked the nurse how many pounds I'd gained yesterday and she said, "a few." She wouldn't give me specific number. Maybe I don't want to know the real number. Benefit of cancer brain: I can't remember what my weight was the time before
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Hi Pink, make sure your MO recalculates your CM dose now that you're 8 lbs lighter. It supposes to be less drug.
As for hairs, I was born with a full head of dark baby hairs (Mom still has picture to proved it). So, it was eerie at first to touch my bald velco liked head but I was tire of them falling around my house, into my food, my neck, back etc... I have chemo hat & wig ready, 2 more hats on the way from Headcovers.com. Check this website out ladies, it was found by Mom (BC patient) & Daughter team with lot of choices.
C'est la vie! Qui. Beside, what am I gona do? Complaint to City Hall !
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Chemo round #2 ..Today was a good news day for once
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Had my #2 of the TCHP today .... and got some good news about my tumor.. my MO measured it .. and from Round #1 it has shrunk by 1/2 !!
it was at 2 cm at the first chemo ( really less she was measuring with tissue around it ) but now its about 1 cm ( again really less due to tissue she was measuring with it ) .
With one treatment its 1/2 the size!!!!
MY MO said this was excellent news ... it means the chemo is working!! Its destroying the tumor and anything else that may or may not be out in my body...
I cried ....
I sat at Panera's this morning eating breakfast with my Husband and broke down and cried...I just didn't want to do this .. just no.. but after MO talked to me and the Oncologist Pharmacist ( who FYI I adore ) talked to me ..plus my MO measuring me .. I was like " Yeah.. lets kick this shit out of my body!! "
It was proof this is working..
MO said my labs looked good except one my Creatain ( sp?) was a little wonky ...which meant I was a little dehydrated ... so "I" suggested maybe I should start coming in on the Monday or Tuesday after chemo to get fluids... everyone was on board.. So after each chemo I will be going for fluids.. maybe I can keep myself out of the ER ... maybe..
My MO agreed that my fevers on day 5 ad 6 where from the Neulasta ......
I can go walking when I feel up to it.. and she said if I wanted too I could go swimming??!! Which I'm not but she said it would ok if I was in a pool.. not a river or lake...
AND Vanderbilt Cancer Center standard for running Herciptin is 1 hour after you get your loading dose ..I was worried about it from what I have read here on the boards and other places that it's best to do 1 hour to 1 hour and 1/2 with Herciptin .. it helps with the sx.
A pt. can request 30 mins and up to 90 min. but for my Cancer Center it's standard care is 1 hour for maintenance dosing ... . Woot!
If my sx get worse I will get them to do hour and 1/2 .. no problem ..
I had the Neulasta injector put on my stomach this time .. I'm not sure if I'm going to like it.. I keep bumping it on stuff.. ....
Very tired.. came home and took a 3 hour nap... didn't get any sleep last night... plus they gave me some Ativan in my IV ... makes me sleeeeeepy ...
It was all uneventful really, sat there and watched tv with my hubby... ate lunch... took much less time about 6 hours including MO appt.
So down the rabbit hole of chemo I go.. wish me luck..
if I don't respond right away .. I will
much love love love
Denise love in TN0 -
Susie.. :::a big warm hug:::: honey your right on track...
I'm not going to lie... I thought "well its just hair" it will grow back.. then my started falling out about two week mark... it makes all this real.... it makes us really someone who is sick...
I cried... and its ok to do so......
What helped me get to the point that it was semi ok? Thinking of the hair this way... and this was suggested by a friend a mine .. Think about it as your body getting rid of the cancer .....that hair is diseased ( not really but work with me here ) and your body is getting rid of anything that is connected to that disease.. if that makes sense..
Also, for me seeing my hair lost a lot like a snake shedding its skin when it has out grown its old self....
This cancer is creating a new person out of who we were.... we will never be the same.... I like to think we are becoming who we really was meant to be.. because after all this ...only the important things in life will be in our world.... all else will be back ground noise...
And like the snake shedding its skin .....our hair is our body's way of shedding the old us ....so the new us can be reborn...
I know this may sound woo woo.. but hey I'm woo woo lol
Still not completely ok with it ... but with time I will be....
much love from TN ::::hugs:::: we'll through this ... we will
Denise0 -
DeniseT What you said makes so much sense and brought tears to my eyes. I know it's all true. I'm going to make it through this. I was never an emotional person and now I feel like this chemo is messing with my image. Hell i cry if someone asks how I'm doing. Now I'm crying over hair. My husband jokingly said that chemo was making me human! I do everything on my own and it drives me insane that now I need help. Besides the hair I feel really good this week. I have a bit of a head cold but hoping that doesn't delay chemo set for Friday. Is it true the 2nd chemo side effects are worse than the first?
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day seven after round 3 of AC and holy cow am I tired. First couple days were good a little woozy but nothing I couldn't handle., then crazy aches and tension headaches from the neulasta for a few days..now the headache has subsided but I am soo tired. Just letting myself rest but thankfully I can still function as far as taking care of my kids, running errands, etc. One other thing is my eyes are so stinking dry. One day at a time that's all I keep reminding myself. I will beat the shit out of this cancer
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Got my port in today and found out my first chemo session will be on July 25th.
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Just took my 2nd TCHP.. I think sx are like any other thing.. everyone is different...
So far I'm feeling that "spacey" feeling .. tired.. but wired feeling ..
I'm sure it will hit me on Sunday that's how it did last time..
Honey you have every right to cry .. scream.. shake your fist at the sky.... this is about as real as it gets... and its hell.. its not all "cute" pink ribbons... this cancer has an ugly side... its all ugly ... but....
Its here and we have to deal with the best way we can with what is ....
For me I decided for whatever time I have left here... be it 2 years or 30 years... I'm going to live my life as someone who has came out of this hell a better person...
I wish the Universe would have been a little nicer in getting my attention about tearing me down to rebuild me .. but I don't get choose ...
But like a Phoenix I will rise out the ashes of the old me.. and be reborn into who The Creator meant me to be.... I will be better not bitter..
Yes less hair.. and many scars ... but these I will wear proudly ... it shows that I went to battled for my life...
Many hugs ... from TN.
Denise0 -
Leatherette ::hugs:::
Ok.. think of it this way your are on your way kicking this cancer right out of your body.....
Hugs
Denise0 -
huey, I'm not doing AC ... so all I can do is :::hugs::: hang in there... just think one step closer kicking this cancer to the curb!
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Hhuey and Denise,
I know my chemo was relatively easier than yours mainly bc ER + status. Still been there a couple of wks ago for 16 wks. Was semi-suicidal from pain. Did take quite a few pain killers in order to finish last chemo. I presciption pill shopped for those pain killers. Could not stay up for more than 5 min due to fatigue at times.
I decided when this bomb exploded this war is for me. I need to stay alive to be a crabby wife to my saint hubby. I will stay alive to volunteer at animal shelter. All of us sisters have ony one choice to make. Anything looks like that may block us is only temporary.
Cry when you want to. We sisters more than understand. Our husbands may not know what we are going thru but they understand.
Gentle hugs
Mimi
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Hello my virtual sisters,
Here is another poem that is somewhat applicable to us. I think it'll sound better if I replace "men" with "women" when reading it.
Do not go gentle into that good night
Dylan Thomas, 1914 - 1953
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
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🤗🤗🤗 to everyone feeling down today. It will get better. Believe. Every day is a new beginning with or without cancer.
Got my second treatment this morning. Took the Tylenol as soon as I got home to help with the headache. A little sleepier than last time but I was more relaxed this time. Nurse said to take antihistamine for the runny nose.
Denise: love your words of wisdom. Now looking at the hair loss as getting rid of all the cancer. Feeling much better about seeing myself bald thanks to you. Happy for your good news which is always welcome.
Ladies, rest when you need to. Go easy on yourselves. Slowly but surely it will get better. It just takes time
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Your welcome... all will be well.. for us all..
Hugs from TN.
Denise0
