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Looks like DCIS again

kkubsky
kkubsky Member Posts: 47

Went for annual mammo/us this morning. Wasn't feeling particularly nervous as it has been 6 yrs since original diagnosis. I was recently diagnosed with an aortic aneurysm which has taken up the worry space in my brain. But looks like the DCIS is back. They were able to do the biopsy today and now I wait for results. The radiologist felt pretty certain it was DCIS again but of course I will have to wait and see what the pathology comes back as. It is right back where the original lumpectomy was done. Praying it is "only" DCIS and not invasive. Even so, a mastectomy seems to be my future. I am so discouraged, and terrified that this will be invasive. I am not quite over processing the recent aneurysm diagnosis and now this. I have already decided to have bilateral mastectomy and to go flat. I never wanted to have to be here posting bad news again. This all seems a bit much to take in. The original DCIS threw me over the edge 6 years ago and it took me a long time to get close to normal. Now to have to face it again, possibly invasive, is just too much. I am supposed to be keeping my blood pressure down....right...good luck with that.

Comments

  • ctmbsikia
    ctmbsikia Member Posts: 752

    Oh wow. Sorry you have so much going on. Hope you get good results.

  • Craftylou57
    Craftylou57 Member Posts: 2

    Hi Connecticut, I'm feel so sad for you as everything you are going through, I too have been there and still going through it I guess. I had DCIS back in 2014 in left breast, with 2 surgeries, radiation, and Arimidez for five years. Thought I was done. Last July had annual mammo, and of course was called back for my right breast. Then on to the biopsy. Unfortunately, I was never called to let me know of my diagnosis. I found out on the patient portal I had DCIS again. (Dr never has called me back). Went back to same surgeon (he is a saint!!) and he was so compasionate and explained all the options, including the same route I had the first time. However, the DCIS was a bit scattered, so I chose a double mastectomy as I was so exhausted with doctor appointments, one after the other. Do i have any regrets?? Absolutely not!!! I know I am not the normal, but the mastectomy was fine!! Actually, it was great! I went in on a Tuesday at 11:30, surgery at 2:00, and back home by 8:00. If I didn't have those stupid drains in, I would of gone back to work on Friday. I had no pain whatsoever, soreness yes, but no pain. He told me when he was done with the surgery he injected a drug to stop the pain for 3-4 days, and then hopefully I could use Motrin or Tylenol. I don't know when it wore off, and I only used Motrin once or twice. The drains were so annoying, and I had to keep them in an additional week, but they were tolerable. When they took those out, didn't feel a thing!!! I am now totally flat, or a little bumpy in places........... Surgeon said to come back in three months unless I was having problems, not a one!! So, I will be heading back next week. The only issue I may need to have is the "dog ears" has they are quite large, but don't know at this time if I'm going to do anything about it....have to talk to him.

    Now the rough part. The anxiety is the absolute worst!!!! Not knowing the results is devastating and beyond stressful!! The good thing was I had been through this before, but the bad thing was, I HAD BEEN THROUGH this before!!!!! Even though I've moved on, my mind still goes back to that awlful time and the anxiety just creeps back up. Waiting to get appointments, waiting for drs. to call back, waiting in offices (many times an hour or more after my appt time), waiting to get results back. That was a major reason why I choose a BMX. Not to mention living very close to Washington DC in northern VA and the traffic here is totally unbelievable. So waiting once again in traffic to even get to doctors appointments!!! I know I sound like I'm complaining, and I am!! Don't want to do this again!!!!!!

    I wish I had a something I could say to make you feel better, other than I'm feeling your anxiety right now!! Ever since I read your posts the other day, my heart just bottomed out!!! Please keep posting so I know how you are doing, and remember even though we don't know each other, we really do know each other!!!

  • kkubsky
    kkubsky Member Posts: 47

    Craftylou57 Hope my experience is like yours! I definitely want the least possible surgery with the most benefit so flat it will be. I have been looking at various pictures and some look a lot better than others! How does one know if a surgeon can get it right? Some of the ladies look absolutely stunning being flat. And some of the tattoos are amazing. I wonder about clothing too. Maybe I am thinking to far ahead. I just want this surgery over with. I hope I can get back to normal mentally faster than the last time. I had sooooo much anxiety for soooooo long....worried about recurrence. And here it is. I am even second guessing my decision to just do lumpectomy and rads back in 2016. Maybe I wouldn't be where I am now.

    You are so right about the good thing is we've been through it before. And the bad thing is we have been through it before! That is so true. I think you totally get me and how I am feeling now. Just knowing that, helps.

    I guess I have to hope it really is "just" DCIS again but am really scared it might be more.

  • LivinLife
    LivinLife Member Posts: 301

    Feeling for both of you regarding recurrence and the anxiety and stress that brings! I chose to go flat and have no regrets. I was larger prior to my BMX and have to say life has been so much easier going flat. Some "iron bra" feeling though if I keep up my doorway stretches once in a while it's often just background noise. Best to you! Please keep us updated....

  • kkubsky
    kkubsky Member Posts: 47

    My plan is to go flat. At least if I have to get rid of the girls, let me get some sort of benefit from it. I would be happy not having to wear a bra. I am not a fan of a lot of cleavage so being able to wear some of the shirts that just hang would be a plus for me. I am a DD and I envy the little boobers that wear all these cute shirts etc. Of course that calls into question the size of my belly! It would probably look better if it were smaller.

    Is there anything I can do to prepare myself for the surgery now?

  • minustwo
    minustwo Member Posts: 13,070

    Kkubsky - here's a thread that will give you lots of info about preparing for surgery

    https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/91/topics...