Topic: Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Forum: Older Than 60 Years Old With Breast Cancer — Meet other women who are similar in age and dealing with age-appropriate issues.

Posted on: Feb 7, 2009 06:29PM

Posted on: Feb 7, 2009 06:29PM

Northstar wrote:

I am an "older" woman with breast cancer (I was diagnosed at 65 and am now 66).  I notice that most of the posts seem to be from people younger than I am (often by quite a bit...).   I'd love to "talk" with others my age, exchange info about their diagnoses, effects on their lives, etc.   I see that there is a forum for young women.

Someone suggested that maybe it's that older people aren't so computer-savvy or aren't used to being in online discussion groups.   However, for those who are, it would be great. 

DX 8/15/08, ILC, 5.1 cm, Stage IIb, Grade 1, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-, Oncotype DX 11.
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Sep 17, 2012 10:28AM illinoislady wrote:

Morning....I am running late today and have to get can my clock go so fast in the morning.  I'll be back after work to chat.....see ya' all then.

Hugs, Jackie

Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, dreams that turned into reality and likes that turned into love. ~~~Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross Dx 9/27/2007, IDC, 5cm, Stage II, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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Sep 17, 2012 11:03AM duckyb1 wrote:

Well this is a contest I didn't want to win.........................Friggin 77, and counting.............will be 2 years since surgery in ladies are babies compared to that is depressing..................think I'll get my Teddy Bear, my Blankie, and go back to

Ducky Dx 2/15/2011, IDC, Right, 1cm, Grade 1, 0/8 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Radiation Therapy 4/25/2011 Whole breast: Breast
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Sep 17, 2012 11:55AM w6uqfcgomeo wrote:

Good morning to my new wonderful family.  Even though I am new I also want to welcome our new people, Susannahw, Cindi74 and Edithester....

Love the idea of sending messages to a number of people at one time, so here goes:

Chevyboy - Loved the picture of the tea cup and flowers...made my day too.  Really like the idea of adding the Kahlua....  Glad you found 3 younger people that have hade the hearing loss, that will help the case.  Regarding the legal expense, most lawyers (Medical Malpractice)charge a 40% contingency and take it out of the proceeds, and MOST will not charge you if they take the case and don't win or settle.  You should join in with other people with the same situation and share the legal expenses.  Regarding a doctor (your ENT and Oncologist) not saying it was the medication, don't worry about that, all you have to document is the fact you suddenly lost the hearing.  Have the brainsteam test!!  What you need to do is go to a company, I know one, that does medical expert witness reviews.  They will charge from $750 up to review the case for merit, but then all 4 of you could share the charge.  Ask me about this I will tell you more.  REgarding the perferated ear drum, don't worry about that, that would resolve itself since ear drums do that (middle ear) and that is no defense for them. 

   Susannah - I notice you have been on this road 6 months...  It is no fun, but at least you are not alone.

IllinoisLad - I notice you will be havingt a 5 year anniversery on September 27th....Jackie you and I are the same age, 67....!!!  Congrates for almost getting to 5 year mark.  Are you still on meds?  Good luck with your cartlidge situation.

 Trying to deal with not getting the treatment I deserved and needed has cause a lot of anxiety and stress.  My plan is to get a medical review of the lab situation from a company that does that sort of thing for lawyers, found it on the internet.  I am learning as I go thru this experience.  It will cost me $750 but then I can tell the attorneys, "look here I have done part of your work, my case does have merit and meets the requirements for negligence and damages," so now you can take the case.  Problem is the cost to litigate is high so smaller firms don't want a complex case, larger firms have 50-75 people waiting in the wings to have there case reviewed.  Having been a legal secretary and also in medical field (unit secretary, extensive medical training) I have done that homework too and believe the case is meritorious. 

Cindi74 -  I noticed you are 75 and have been on this road 2 months.  I am sure everyone on this website will be of help to you.  Wish I had found it sooner.

Edithester - Hope you will find all the posts comforting.  It sure has been for me.  Are you having any special issues?

Termite - just love your name.......I notice you are having your 6 month visit today, how did it go?  Please let all of us know.  We will be sending support your way for strength.

To all my new family -  I am sorry if I overwhelmed you by telling you what I have been going thru.  It did not happen all at once, it was one thing right after another.  Many times I feel like I am living a nightmare I can't wake up from.  I have good moments and then bad. Lots of anxiety over the fact I could not get the treatment I needed and deserved.  I am glad I was able to solve the vit d and hormone situation, but they tell me that is only part of the problem.  Not having hope of future help also is hard to live with, I just fall thru the cracks.  I am sure this group will help, having loving support.

Tonight the local cancer support group is having a picnic.  They have meeting only from Sept. thru the winter and recess for the summer.  I went a few times but don't really fit in very well due to the unusual situations regarding my bc.  They all know each other and it is a very small group, so I just sit there and, of course, with all the questions they ask when I have to tell them why I could not get treatment it is very upsetting.  Also, most of them have had cancer YEARS ago so none of them are new or are up on even the Oncotype DX test, they did not even know what I was talking about, I could hardly believe it....but, I will try again, will let you know how it goes.  Must run for now....Hope to hear from all of you....Mary

Dx 9/7/2011, IDC, Stage IB, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/11/2011 Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left
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Sep 17, 2012 03:54PM chevyboy wrote:

Hey Mary!  Did you see I sent you a PM?   Go up to the top left hand corner, and you will see "Private Messages" ...  And when you find that, click on that link, and you will see that message I sent you this morning....I just talked more in detail about what I have done so far....

Don't pay any attention to any of those other gals at the support group....Maybe they are waiting for YOU to talk?  I'm sure if they knew more about you, maybe a little at a time, they would be more receptive?   Are they mostly older?  Sometimes it's hard to make "friends" with younger women?

Just start talking to them.... only tell them what they ask.... If they aren't interested in what you are saying, you will know....  Then leave, and go find a nice cold Margarita!  Or two!   Or drink one, and THEN go to the support group, Ha, ha!  Wink

Don't walk ahead of me, I might not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not want to lead. Just walk beside me & be my friend. Dx 11/2009, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+ Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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Sep 17, 2012 03:57PM carolehalston wrote:

Hi to everyone.  Welcome to newcomers.  I just caught up on reading posts.  W6, your experiences make me feel lucky to have been dx'ed and treated in backward ole Louisiana!  I'm three years out and now get checked out once a year.  I take arimidex and look forward to not taking it in a couple of years, but I tolerate the SEs pretty well.   I opted for bilateral mx and immediate reconstruction and was fortunate to skip chemo and rads.  I had a low oncotype dx number even though my IDC was grade 3.  I went through agony waiting for the results of the oncotype. 

I've been too busy lately to check in.  Here's a quick summary.  DH and I enjoyed a couple of days in Milwaukee.  His niece and her dh were kind enough to show us around.  The weather was wonderful, bright and mild.  We took a boat ride on the Milwaukee river and a bit of Lake Michigan on Saturday.  Lots of interesting historical info on the city and the river.  Then we went to the art museum, which is located on Lake Michigan.  Very modern architecture and a stunning building.  As impressive as the capitol bldg in Madison but in an entirely different way.  I had the feeling as I wandered around and gazed upward and outward that I was in the presence of architectural genius.

Now we're in Joliet, IL.  Whew.  Tomorrow we'll leave the camper here and drive to Holland, MI, to visit dh's cousin and his wife, people whose company we really enjoy.  We have no luggage so we'll put our toiletries, clothes, whatever, in canvas boat bags! 

Tonight we're having dinner with dh's brother at our favorite Chicagoland chain, Portillo's.  Hotdogs, brats, Italian beef sandwiches, fries are all favorites on the menu.

Kaara, where are you? 

Nipple-Sparing BMX w/Alloderm & Silicone Implants 7/24/09, Oncotype Dx 9, No Chemo, No Rads, Arimidex Dx 6/25/2009, IDC, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 3, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Sep 17, 2012 06:03PM w6uqfcgomeo wrote:

Chevy - Thanks for the info on the private message.  I did not know how to do that.  I just love the idea of a margarita...!!  Actually, as of late, I like to have a beer or 2 in the evening.  I will sit outside and look at the stars.  It is just awsome...!!  Very relaxing.  Wish I could have a drink, but have to drive to the support group so think it not best.  With the way my luck is going I would be stopped and I'm sure you get the rest of that picture.

Carolehalst -  Thanks for sending me a message.  Glad you received good care and are doing so well.  Sounds like a nice trip, Michigan is beautiful....have a Brat for me....!Take care...Mary

Dx 9/7/2011, IDC, Stage IB, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/11/2011 Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left
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Sep 17, 2012 06:41PM bonnets wrote:

Carol, have an Uno's pizza for me while you're there. I was a Chicago girl!

Took the dressing off, well, discovered there ARE steri strips on both incisions, even though I told them I'm allergic! See how long I can tolerate them. Also broke out from the plastic dressing tape. Oh well. After  reading Mary's problems this is just trivia. See the surgeon a week from today for the reports, hoping for rads. Jean

Bonnets Dx 8/30/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 9/14/2012 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Right, Sentinel Radiation Therapy 10/22/2012 Breast
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Sep 17, 2012 08:39PM - edited Sep 17, 2012 08:42PM by termite

Carolehalst, you are not far from me if you are in Joliet. Work in Plainfield, and live in Oswego

I love Portillos food especially their hot dogs, Italianh beefs and chocolate cake.

I had good results from my OC visit today. Will see him again in 6 mos. It used to be every 3 months but after 2 years out it went to 6 months. After 5 years it will be yearly. After reading the stories about a few of the ladies experiences I feel very lucky. After being diagnosed in March of 2010, they gave me to the surgeons office and they set up all my tests for me and the day of surgery. Had a lumpectomy and mammosite for radiation. The oncologlist did everything for the Onco type test and number was low so I chose not to do chemol. The clinic I go to has been very helpful and supportive.

New company that took over our center is okay.  A lot of changes some for the good and some will take time to get use to it.

4 in the morning comes early so I will be back tomorrow.

Have a great evening and week

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Sep 18, 2012 12:56AM w6uqfcgomeo wrote:

Jean:  Regarding your allergy to tape, you might want to try a trick my primary dr. told me about.  Have your primary give you some steriod nasal spray sampler and then spray it on the tape before it goes on.  I am so sensitive that I had to carry it with me all the way to both surgeries to make sure they used it.  Can't hurt to try.  Hope it helps....Mary

Dx 9/7/2011, IDC, Stage IB, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/11/2011 Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left
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Sep 18, 2012 06:57AM - edited Sep 18, 2012 07:12AM by chevyboy

Morning gals..... yes, that tape can be a problem!  I think they almost always use steri-strips, at least for closing the incision, and sometimes tape over the gauze bandage... That tape, almost no matter what kind, will either cause hives, or like peel off your skin when they take it off!  (On some otherwise normal people) Wink  I had to take anti-biotics for that and around the incision where the MammoSite Device was.

Sometimes they will put a "stocking" over your head, and over your bandages to hold everything in place...Much better than the tape.  It's like a boob sleeve or something like that.  It's a mesh tube-top!  Anyway, good job Jean!

Carole I think you got the gals hungry, Ha!  The closest I get to those dogs, are at Costco, the Polish Dog, with a drink.... $1.50!  I can't find those dogs anywhere!  I mean the big juicy ones..... and you can add chopped onions, relish & mustard if you want.  Edited to add...they are the Hebrew National Polish Sausages, but I just read Costco is no longer carrying them?  Now THAT's a bummer!   Something about a lawsuit???

When DH and I go, we split one, and that's usually enough for lunch, or else their Baked Chicken Sandwiches.  Man, those can last for 3 meals.

Congratulations Termite.... Another milestone!

I'm just going to my PC every year for a physical, and the blood-work.  I asked her to take over for the Oncologist, since she was the one giving me the scrip for the Tamoxifen, and I no longer take it anyway.  I get the mammograms twice a year though.

Jackie, where ARE you??  Are you working too hard?  Miss hearing from you...... xoxoxoxo

Don't walk ahead of me, I might not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not want to lead. Just walk beside me & be my friend. Dx 11/2009, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+ Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)

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