Illinois ladies facing bc
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This above all: to thine own self be true; And it must follow, as the night the day; Thou canst not then be false to any man.
-- William Shakespeare,0 -
Annette: so many things out there. I know it is hard but you will get through this. You have so much on your plate right now!
Blackjack, I know it will settle in soon. You are the school nurse, right? You have such an opportunity to do positive things for kids. The school nurse at my school said that 80% of the visits to her office were because the kid was scared about home affairs, FRIEND issues and/or school performance. The kid didn't know what was really bothering him, but the nurse did. She would give them a quick pat on the back (nurses can touch kids more than teachers) and water in a dixie cup (water cures a lot of things) and sent them back to class. The school nurse knows so much about a child and she can be the bridge between home and school.Then of course, you have to deal with hair lice (YIKES) and now is it or is it not swine flu! I miss my school nurse now that I am in retirement. She kinda did the same sort of thing to me when I was troubled ( a hug, a glass of water) and now that I think of it my worries were the same as the kids~~~~~Good luck!
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*waving at everyone*
As always, I'm way far behind here. Life's been extremely busy and stressful lately, with a few curve balls thrown in for good measure. My son has moved home after finally finishing college (anyone know of of a job opening for an engineering/business grad?), and my daughter will be moving away to college in the city for the first time next weekend. The transition has my household feeling (and looking!) completely unsettled.
I mentioned to some of the ladies at Jan's get-together about the lump I had in my mastectomy side. As much as I've tried to not overreact, it was really bothering me, so I finally called my BS and moved my appt. up. Yesterday I had my MRI and after holding my breath all day at work waiting for my results, I finally got the call that it was NORMAL! *whew* I guess the lumpy stuff is just scar tissue or something.
Also, got some bad news that the mother of a close friend, who I also consider a friend, had lost her very long battle with br. cancer. Her son has been a friend of my husband and mine since college. I remember her first getting diagnosed when we were still in school, this was almost 30 years ago. When I was first diagnosed, she was a wonderful source of hope and support for me, calling and sending cards with helpful notes. It wasn't until shortly before she passed that I found out that her recurrence actually happened right around the time I was in chemo, but she didn't want anyone to tell me and possibly upset me. So all the time she was offering me support, she was fighting her own battle again, and I never knew. It breaks my heart that I didn't know and wasn't able to reach out to her, but I respect and love her for being so thoughtful and considerate.
We attended her memorial service last Sat. She was 79, and as sad and as really difficult as it was to be there, I also believe that she lived a very full and happy life. She was married to the same wonderful man for 58 years. She raised 3 sons, and lived to see them all married with children of their own. I didn't really break down until her sweet husband got up and talked about her being the bravest person he ever knew and he called her his "hero."
So, here's to you, Sally. She may not have ever posted here, but she was a fellow Illinois gal who gladly gave support to a sister when it was really needed.... R.I.P. and thank you for everything.
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Morning all....have been nursing my back....again. And all I did was sit kinda hunched over for about 1.5 hours. If I had to dx myself I would say that I "gapped" my lower spine and allowed that pesky disc out. 3 days of serious self-administered pt with icing and advil and I am much better. REALLY need to keep good posture at all times.
Annette....so very sorry to hear about all that you have been going thru. So many of these "little" things turn out to be nothing much so that is what I am hoping and praying for you. And I do hear you re: clinics, hospitals, doctors, tests, scans etc. I am so tired of it all....I keep remembering the good old days when we went once a year and called ourselves done. Hugs!
Irene....I am so sorry that you lost a dear friend to this wretched disease. But....it sounds like she did indeed have a wonderful, full life and that there was a long time between the cancers so that does give me hope. She was a very selfless person to never mention to you what she herself was going thru.....you must have been very special to her. Which indeed you are! Sorry....I don't know of any job openings for your son but if I hear of anything, I will email you!
Blackjack...you sound so busy, yet so tired. Please take care of yourself, dear friend! There are always Moms who are willing to volunteer...maybe that might help for some of the non-nursey stuff??? (Is that a word....non-nursey?)
Sorry this is short but I need to get in a shower and then I am going to attempt the gym and then off to the grovery store or we are going to be eating take-out...again. Have a good day...looks like some clouds/rain are in store for today.....
(Jackie...loved your quote from yesterday and yep, I would hire you! Only trouble with a cleaning lady is that I would need to completely clean my house BEFORE she came)
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Morning girls!
Annette - so sorry that you have to go through this worrying and waiting. I will say some prayers that the spots are nothing to worry about.
Irene - your post almost brought me to tears. Shocking that your friend had a recurrence after 30 years! I remember when my dad passed away at 82 - it was comforting to know that he had lived a happy, full life. No matter how old someone is, life is still too short.
Wendy - hope you back feels better.
Blackjack - hang in there - you will get into the routine soon.
Kids went back to school yesterday. I realized in the afternoon that I forgot to take their picture! We always take a picture on our front porch on the first day. I guess it will have to be a day late this year! They both had a good first day.
Jackie - I wish you could clean my house as well. I have had several cleaning ladies and have never formed a good relationship with them. They have all been Polish and I have trouble getting past that language barrier. We had a male once that was part of the team and we always thought he was really good - until my husband went upstairs once and found him laying on the floor in our master bedroom sleeping! I guess at least he wasn't in the bed! Unbelievable!
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Wendy - I love your last line. My DH always complains the day before cleaning day as he doesn't understand why we have to clean the house before they come! I try to explain that we are not cleaning, we are picking up. They are not hired to organize our junk and put it away. He doesn't get it.
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"Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience."
- Victoria Holt0 -
Prayers and/or thoughts needed, maybe more for me than SIL. He has been sick with wretched diarrhea for a few weeks and they can't figure it out. They fit him in with an appointment with a specialist. I half wish they would put him in the hospital to rush all tests. He is miserable, worried about work, and I am kinda a wreck myself. All the waiting is rough when it is on you, but even harder when it is on a lovced one. I was awake all during the night and tried praying.
It seems a number of us are going through a less than great time. Wendy, I know exactly how you spent the last few days. Icing is what does it right away. It takes nearly nothing to mess the back up. Once all I did was GET UP!
Rene, the news about you is good. So sorry about your friend. Yup, I think the bad cell can just hide out for years. I am very sorry Sally died.
Annette, I know you are still troubled. Thinking of you.
Connie, the cleaning man on the floor did make me smile.
So with ths post comes a question. What do you do when you are all wrapped up and worried? Any suggestions on strategies to help you during the "what if" times in your life? I would appreciate hearing any.
Susan
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IT'S THAT TIME AGAIN!
Komen - Chicago Race for the Cure!
TEAM: NO SURRENDER lives on!
This year will be our 4th annual 5k (3 mile) walk (a 1 mile walk is an option)!
Please join us on Saturday, September 26th. We meet between 7:00 am and 8:00 am at the Survivor Tent (refer to race day map). All survivors get lots of goodies in the tent including bagels and coffee. We start walking at 8:30. Closer to walk day, I will provide details. If you have any questions, phone, PM or e-mail me.
If you register by September 7th - your t-shirt/race day packet will be mailed directly to your home - (this avoids having to wait in line for it on the day of the race).
Here's a link to my home page. You can register at my homepage. It's lots of fun! Each year our team grows...hope you will join us. Bring the hubbies, the kids and your friends.
http://www.komenchicago.org/index.php?registration-information
http://www.komenchicago.org/index.php?map-race-day-information
I hope you will join us! This year I will be making signs for us to carry that say:
Illinois Girls Are Tough!
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Susan...how about this...if you spend too much of your life saying "what if....", you never have time to say "Why not!"
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I think I said that wrong...what I meant is if you spend too much time worrying "what if it comes back" you won't have any time should something fun and exciting come your way to say "Why the h**l not!!!!"
There...is that better? Duh...chemobrain is on the rise....
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As for worrying about our future...the only thing I can say is that you will most likely worry less as time goes on. Joining in the "walk" each year...helps me feel a sense of empowerment.
Two more girls in my October 2005 chemo group have just been diagnosed with recurrences. So far, out of 16 of us, 1 has mets and 3 have had a recurrence. It breaks my heart to think of them having to deal with it again.
Irene - I'm sorry about your friend
Susan - I hope it's nothing serious.
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Hi everyone......so much news. Rene', you must have nearly been like one of Sally's own. I'm sure she did not want you to lose even the smallest ounce of optimism or any of your will and determinism to get through your bout of bc. Those who I think have led a loving and full life would never dream of putting "things" on anyone else. On the night before my mother died she told me very plainly that she had suffered. It was the first reference I had ever heard my whole life long.....but she did not want me to "carry" any of her suffering. Sally did not want you to feel any obligation to do so either. These people are our treasure and as her husband so aptly said....our hero too. They teach us grace, and dignity and what real love and devotion to life and others is all about. I'm sad for you and her family, but what a joy to have shared life with her.
Susan.....I wish I had some words of wisdom for you. The only way out of it is through it, but it's not much of an answer. Sometimes you just have to yell at the Universe to help you let it go when it gets to the point where it is not resolving in any way and just dragging you further down. I took it that your distress is more right now for your SIL. I know we often find our strength in the negative events in our lives and I hope you find your strength very soon.
Wendy....I had lots of ladies who had to "tidy up" before I got there. They did not realize that dirt out in the open was not much of a problem.....now, if I had to do the washing and ironing, and clean out drawers and check expiration dates on food and medicines and make the appts. for the Pediatrician etc....I would have been swamped....just like I often am at home. It's so much easier when you don't have to deal with everyday mundane aspects and go to the heart of the matter and remove the dirt.
Susan....suggestion....go walk in a Botanical Garden and walk for as long as you can or any park for that matter. Just as long as you can keep walking. I often have solved un-answerable problems or was able to let them go that way.
Wishing a good week-end for all of you.
Hugs,
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Yes, Jackie, I am not worried about me. I am worrried about my son in law. I did go for a walk, got movies for tonight and some books. I have to relax because I am making my family crazy. No more news but a big test next week. It is so long to wait, but Jackie, you are right, the only way out of it is by going through it. My "control issue" is rearing its ugly head.
Wow, I am just learning about that Hurricane Bill on the east coast. That is scary.
Have fun tonight.
Susan
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Had the test on my legs and arms today for neuropathy. No one told me how painful this would be. they put nodes on your arms and legs (not at same time) and then run electric current thru them so see how your nerves react. For the nerves deeper in your legs they have to turn up the intensity of the current. Very painful and as I am very overweight the current on thighs and calves was very high. He said I did well for as high as he needs to set it. The only good thing about it was he did not see any periferal neuropahy from the chemo, which is what we thought the leg pains was from. It had been improving, so maybe it is clearing up with no permanent damage. Since the pains started with chemo who knows? He said there is something called small nerve neuropathy. Maybe thats what it is? He also asked if I had ever been diagnosed with fibromialgia. I had been several years ago, but it was never really bad like some people get. On most days it was just background aches which I just lived with. It had not really bothered me for a while, but maybe the chemo irritated the nerves and got the fibro going again. I left his office in pain from the tests and took some hydrocodone that did not touch the pain. It took about 6 hours for the pain in legs to wear off. Fortunately the doc said he would do only one arm and one leg. I would have had a hard time doing the other leg. He kept saying if you relax it is easier, but it is hard to relax when you know they are going to send pain up and down your leg from about 20 different places. Hope the pain doc is satisfied with results because I don't want to do that again. They usually do both legs he said if they suspect a pinched nerve. He is doing an mri of my back on 31st but I don't have back pain so I am not expecting it to show anything. The xray of knee and back may show more about the knee pain. I know i have some bone spurs on one knee and since I have been favoring that knee, it probably has put more stain on the other one and it has started hurting. Pain doc says goal is for me to be pain free. We have tried 2 different meds in last week or so and had reactions to both. I see pain doc again Sept 9 But may hear from them before, when get results of tests.. At least radiation seem to be going OK. Finished #20 today out of 37. Next week last 5 reg. Then will have 12 boosts over the next 3 weeks after that. So far not even pink. I guess God knew I needed something to be going OK with everything else I have to think about. Herceptin is going OK too. I am grateful for the fact that I have it. Trying not to worry about pet scan . I would love to have my legs in good enough shape to walk next year in race for the cure . Sorry this has been so much about me, lots of you have things going on too. Hugs to you all. Annette
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Annette....we all want you to do well and be well so some times it requires a lot of talking about oneself. Don't feel bad about that.....I think we all have taken a turn or two or three. I am just hoping the pain issues do get settled down. Also good that you seem so successful with your rads and Herceptin. That is something good to hold onto when the storms come.
Hope you are all ready to have a good week-end.
Hugs,
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Good morning all Laura, I have been thinking about your 05' group and the problems...ok, recurrences which is something no one wants to contemplate. I think while praying for cures I will also pray for a way to know/judge why and how certain individuals seem to have this happen while others do not.
Chilly this a.m. and something I am not used to in August. I'm sure the Balloon Fest got off to a good start....though it was windy yesterday afternoon ( Fest opened at 3 p.m. ) so not sure any balloons hit the sky. We have had years where the balloons only got off the ground once. Hope this is not one of those years.
Going out after Dh gets home from work....he is off at 4 p.m. Jennifier ( Hope4Cure ) and I have exchanged cell phone numbers and if she is out there we will find each other. We had a nice long chat on the phone and I'm sure she is like all of you....full of spirit and looking forward to managing the rest of her NED life.
Wendy....hope the back is doing better now. Just the "little bit" I gave myself getting out of the shower is enough to convince me that anyone who has issues in that area are dealing with a whole lot of discomfort---sadly 24/7 until they get a handle on it. I tip my hat to all of you. I am doing fine now but still watching out a bit more......hopefully I will get into an exercise routine and strengthen some of the muscles in that area now that it seems to be doing well.
Susan I hope you also got a little relief and were able to turn your what if/worry button off for a while. I think it's the Mom in you when you feel it is easier for you to be sick than your loved ones. I'm sending healing thoughts to your SIL and hoping for the best with an easy fix if it is possible.
I need to think about getting my morning meds down me and getting some of my day set up. I'll be checking in later.
Hugs,
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Inspiration: There is no man upon the earth, no foolish man or wise, No man of high or humble birth but somewhere in the skies Can find a star to lead him on if he will lift his eyes.
unknown
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Laura. Hearing about reoccurrences is always so hard, especially knowing them personally and goin thru this jounrey together. Now that i am out of treatment and goin forward, there are still som many emotions present and understand now when you said there is some post trauma to it all.
This week, had a recheck with the BS, eye appt, dentist appt, vet visit for a sick golden. had two different days of people visitng that i cooked for and had my eye brows reshaped (first time since chemo).Also had a teacher meeting this week. Phew!!
The good news is, the DR giving me the trazedone has been working miracle sfor me as it is giving me sleep and more energy that is indescribable.. and being of Femal (health food store), giivng me some hotfash relief and overall balance. Goin back to work will defitniely be doable with these in me!!!So grateful !!!
All good thoughts to you Nan and all those in treatment! Wish we could take some of the stress away from you but somehow you get thru it.'
Have a good weekend all!thanks for being here!
Donna
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Laura.. The race you are in has to be the one my girlfriend is doin for me?!!! will be there and need to find you and meet. Will try to get more info and be sure it is the same race? In the loop right? Looking at your link, it is the same race! I will be in the survivors tent as they have a seat for me.. i will be so excited to meet you!!!!!0
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Hey Everyone,
Just a quick update. We got to Sc last Friday and moved in Saturday. So, we have been here a week. Still have lots of boxes to go through once again. Our living room, kitchen and sunroom are done. Still need to upack the bathroom stuff and bedroom stuff. It seems like it will never end. I havn't been feeling too good and guilty about not doing too much. My husband, his brother and his wife have been helping out alot. I just don't feel very motiviated. Yesterday was a bad day for me but today its better.
We all love it here. The boys started school on Wednesday and they seem to like it. They take the bus at 7:00am and get home at 4pm. So, I pretty much have all day to myself. My husband is working in his office during the day and my daughter just hangs out and is looking for a job.
I got my SS disability approved and will start getting that in November. Plus I get money for the boys too. So, I will be making almost as much as I did when I was working.
Talk to you all later,
Ginny
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GINNY....so good to hear from you. You have been through so much the past few weeks so I am not surprised to hear you are feeling a little punk. You just have to remember that this is lots of mental and physical stress on totally healthy people. Don't be too hard on yourself or concerned about your motivation. It will all work out -- just look how far you are in a mere weeks time.
Great news about the disability. I'm sure that is uplifting and will take a load of you as far as possible financial struggles. We are all thinking about you and wishing you well. Keep in touch.
Hugs,
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Hi, ladies~!
Rene- I am very sorry to hear about your friend and it brought me to tears..
Susan- about that 'What if?' for me, If it happens again, Bring it on~! I will face it, just like I am doing it now... 4 the fight~! When I wrapped up with worries, I try to keep myself busy or go out for walk or singing and driving.. I hope your sil feels better..
Ginny- I am glad you like the new place and feeling better today... Just don't work yourself too much.. take break and have some nice ice tea or cup of tea even...
Wendyk- I hope your back feels better soon.. I wish I can give you a massage which is I am good at it.. Keep the good posture for your back~!
My kids are up from nap and this is my q to get off the computer...
Have a nice evening ladies~!
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Ginny , I am so happy for you and your familly. How old are your boys? Were they nervous about a new school? IT sounds like your family is so together and so willing to face challenges together.
Mich, speaking of boys and new experiences, how are the twins doing at Northern? Perhaps I should first ask, how are the parents doing with two empty spaces at the kitchen table?
Laura, is SIL sister in law or son in llaw? I am concerned about the latter. Elfsong, what a great attitude...if troubles return, say "Bring it on as I will give it the same fight." That is such a remarkable reaction to trouble. I will remember that!
Thanks lady for the thoughts. Anyway, I had a great day and DH and I babysat our grandkids so DD and her DH could get out for some fun tonight. Nothing gets you over your troubles quicker than a delightful two-year old.
Donna, I am so excited to meet you at the walk and I am thrilled that Trazodone is working. Sleep does wonderful things. I never had any "hangover" but then I took it so I could allow for 9 hours of that blessing. You sound like me. I was a sub before I returned fulltime and I was the most dedicated sub! I took my responsibilities very seriously that many just said, "Hey girl, do it fulltime and make some more money, get benefits and and work towards pension. So I did. I LOVED subbing and learned so much. I may do it again that I am retired as I know I will miss kids.
Have a good Sunday!
Susan
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Ever felt an angel's breath in the gentle breeze?
A teardrop in the falling rain?
Hear a whisper amongst the rustle of leaves?
Or been kissed by a lone snowflake?
Nature is an angel's favorite hiding place.
-Carrie Latet0 -
Good morning ladiesw.
This has been a crazy week but I am finally back to the computer.
Thursday I met with my oncologist and the test results all came back normal. My tumor marker had even dropped two points so I was in a pretty good mood. I fixed my dish to take to the bc support group picnic here in town and decided to hit the bathroom instead of braving the picnic area restroom later. OMG! My colon problems were back and naturally I panicked. I have been eating lots of things that are not good for diverticulitis....strawberries, popcorn on the golf course, corn on the cob, cucumbers....only to name a few so I'm hoping that a strict diet will get it under control. Naturally my mind swings to colon cancer and I have to keep reminding myself that I've had this problem for at least 7 years. I'll do the 14 day "watch it" routine and see what happens. Needless to say, I was not my usual perky self at the picnic that night.
So you see, Susan, I can't give you much advice on worrying as I'm the queen of the pack when it comes to worry. Although there are so many different things that could be causing your SIL's problems......many of which are very easily corrected......I do understand your worry. It sounds like some of the gals have given you some good suggestions for dealing with it.
Tanya..Thanks for the green beans. How nice of you to share your extras! They were all grabbed up!
Annette, I am so sorry that you had to go through that terrible test. I do think that the results sound positive, though, and I'm so glad to hear that you're handling the rads well. You are always in my thoughts so please keep us updated. Hugs!
Ginny...so glad that you're getting pretty settled into your new home and that the boys are looking forward to a new school. It looks like you are going to have plenty of time to keep us updatd on how thinga are going for you...and that's just what we want to hear about! Take it easy! You've been through alot! Sllow down a little and build up your energy again. Hugs! PLEASE continue to keep in touch.
Wendy...take care of that back!
Well, I need to get moving and pay some bills. YUCK!
Catch you all later.
Rita
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Hello Friends. I hope you are all doing well. I am fine. I have had 4 rad treatments. I wonder if I am getting a milder dose. Other women going there are given a perscription for a creame to use. I was told to use aquaphor lotion. Also, they put a wet wash cloth over my chest. Telling me its to protect my skin. Did any of you have that. Its a beautiful day, The kids start school tomorrow. The dog and I will both miss them. Love Buddy
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Buddy...I don't think I have ever heard mention here of wet washcloths during rads...hmmm, interesting. I would also assume you are not necessarily getting a milder dose but I don't know what the guidelines are that actually determine dosage. That would be a good question for your rads Dr. I assume you will be seeing him once a week. I think most ladies here had regular consultations during their rads period.
Whatever cream or lotion you use....just don't skimp and don't skip. I sometimes would put extra on a few hours after the rads and then after my evening shower as well. Glad you seem to be doing ok at this point. Aren't rads fairly boring????? Fortunately ( probably trained that way ) the hospital where I had rads ( Carbondale Memorial ) the rads techs were cheerful and smiling most of the time and we had really nice little chats together. After 7 weeks of it I was very glad to be done though.
Rita...had no idea about the diverticulitis....that can have it's difficulties but it is hard when you are faced with certain foods you love....like strawberries which are one of my all time favorites. I'm glad you are feeling somewhat better.
See you all later.
Hugs,.
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Nana ...?
My Mom started taking elavil or am..trip..line...her oncologist said to take it with 1 marinol at night and yes, with lyrica, 75 mg in the am and at night also....she can now sleep and her leg and feet numbness and tingling have subsided, at least......she can sleep now, she could be up to 6 a.m. before she started this. 3-4 days she didnt' take the lyrica over a weekend for whatever reason, and the legs and feet started acting up again, so perhaps the lyrica does help after all.
She also takes glutahione and I took l-glutamine powder when I had chemo to offset future neuropathy. Her oncologist recommended GLUTAPAK, google it, we have not tried that yet..
also a guy in the chemo room told me of another thing i could look up, i heard a girl thank him because it worked for her and it helped his finger tingles so he could work carpentry....it's a nerve support supplement of some kind but my notes are in my car.
My mom is taking weekly chemo, is on her 3rd recurrence of ovarian cancer, has been on chemo since dec. 2007 (monthly but now weekly since april). she is 84 so chemo doesn't bother her too much, but the neuropathy, since switching to doxil then topotecan has been worse, perhaps from all the carbo taxol she had in 1998, 2001 and 2003.
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