Is anyone else an atheist with BC besides me?
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Mandala - I vote for Scrabble too....
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Mandalala...your post was so meaningful to me..."His life was meaningful, or he wouldn't have bothered with it. But he did, and most of the time he was a happy kid." I am so sorry for what a difficult road that must have been. I am so glad for you that you came down that road with meaning. Thank you for sharing that. I had two miscarriages, but I have never lost a child. I cannot imagine how hard that was. Or I do imagine and even that is overwhelming. I hope that I find the same strength to find meaning in all life's challenges... Claire0
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Claire – Thanks! Yes, it was more difficult than words can describe. But I had lots of support from family and friends, and somehow I think being very young (a childish 21) helped.
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When I suddenly developed severe ulcerative colitis and a toxic megacolon people prayed for me. When I got multiple sclerosis people said they prayed for me. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer and underwent a BMX people prayed for me. When I landed in the hospital 2 weeks later with a small bowel obstruction people prayed for me. Enough prayers, I don't think I can withstand much more praying.
Yes, I have always been an atheist, and now I am a 60 yr. atheist with an ileostomy, no boobs and progressive multiple sclerosis. So it goes.
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hey topless,
Boy you have it going on. I promise I will not mention you to my friends because they WILL inevitably "pray for you". Look what they have done to me. Diabetes, RRMS, BC. OH, and hurricane Irene left me 4 feet of dirty water on my 1st floor 1 week after my DX.
Feels like the game Can You Top This.
I'm with you, I feel ya, but I'm all out of prayers.
Sorry for your pain...............(((((())))))...................Maureen
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Wow...we women are really tough... There is such a big list of hurdles we have all faced... And, yet, I suspect that most of us don't think of ourselves as unfairly treated by life. I suspect that few of us have let any of that define us. Reading through all of our posts, it seems instead that we have all been resilient and strong. Finding meaning in the darkest corners of life.
Think it is important to stop once in a while and recognize our own accomplishments...
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Hi topless and welcome to the thread. Wow, you've been having way tooooo much fun! Seriously, though, I'm sorry that you've had all that crap to deal with! Life sure isn't fair!
Mandalala - I'm so sorry for the loss of your child. I simply can't imagine how difficult that would be. :-(
chef127 - Sounds like it's time for some good luck for you too!
Okay here's another funny Tim Tebow parody. Hope you guys enjoy! It seriously cracks me up!!
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PlantLover, I had the same experience with the injections. It really upset me that the nurse would be so callus to say to me that I was over reacting and that it really didn't hurt. They DID put the cream on me and it still hurt like no other I had every experienced! I did put that comment of her's on my evaluation I sent back after the surgery. This whole experience with BC I have taken as part of my life and have dealt with it in away that does not look at the negatives but rather as a journey to wellness. The bumps in the road are part of the journey and I just move past them with more experience. Yes, Sunflowers we are resilient and strong. As atheists I think we are strong in knowing that we are not subject to anyone elses rules of a god and what we must do to lead a good life. We already are good, kind, and lead good lives. The meaning of life is our own and we all seem to be happy and content with where we are. Isn't that what matters? Kitty0
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Kitty........................... AMEN.....................Why don't they do the injection after your knocked out? More torture...............I'm sorry for that experience
Plant lover.................... Thanx for Tebowie, I needed that.
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YEAH, KittyGirl20 - I love your words "we already are good, kind and lead good lives" - or at least doing our BEST to be, do so.
Topless - ouch. OUCH. I still love your sense of humor, and strength, promise not to pray for you. will think of you, wish you well, hoping putting one foot in front of the other, following your heart, will lead you into good places, enjoying what you can enjoy, and continuing to INSPIRE everyone who knows you, as I'm quite sure you do, by being just who you are.
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It's been wonderful to catch up on this thread. I often feel terribly alone in my lack of beliefs and this thread gives me a lot of validation and peace. My life has meaning NOW, not after my death. To me, we are here to help each other. It's not some contest to vie for prizes in some afterlife.
I also try to find joy wherever I can, most commonly in the beauty of nature and the stars. I don't mind not knowing all the answers. Not sure if I can accomplish this, but I'd really like to meet my eventual death with an overwhelming curiosity, rather than fear of the unknown.
--CindyMN
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Welcome back, Chumfry.
You know, all I have to do is tell my hubby I'm reading my favorite thread and he knows I'm talking about this one. It also helps me to not feel so alone to have this place to say how I feel. I sure can't do it in my day to day life which makes me kinda sad.
I agree, my life has meaning NOW. I want to love my friends, family, and even strangers just as much as I possibly can NOW.
My 16 year old has been asking me in the past year or so what do I think happens when you die. I'm having a really hard time telling him that I think you just die. I really want him to come to his own conclusions. I try to just keep saying that I really don't know, which is true ... I don't know. I only know what I believe much the way those that believe in heaven and hell don't know ... it's just what they believe.
He has also been asking me if I'm afraid of dying.
My answers are that it makes me sad to think of leaving him and all the others that I love and it makes me sad to think about them being without me. However, I'm not afraid of dying. I told him, for me, that's why it's so important to try to enjoy your life as much as possible & to bring as much love and joy to those you care about every day. I think we continue to exist in those we leave behind. I hope that the majority of memories I leave for them are good ones.
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When DH had heart surgery, DS asked me if I was afraid to die. I told him I wasn't afraid to be dead, but afraid the process would be icky and hurt. He said that's what he thought also. I take comfort that dying is part of living and happens to everything alive eventually. The task we have while living is to experience each moment fully. And we do live on in the hearts and memories of those we love.
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I agree Wren, I always answer, I am not at all afraid to die, but I am afraid of the dying and what horrors that could bring, so we get back to the living for the moment...
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Wow, I've been away for some time and come back to pages of moving, funny, human stories... Having finished radiotherapy a couple of days before the New Year, I am now officially finished with treatment. As such, I was feeling a certain reluctance to come back on the boards, as I felt I needed to break away to start afresh and face the new year and my new world. I hope this doesn't sound selfish, but I also hope you know what I mean... I am so grateful to so many of the women here who find out about different treatments, read up on every piece of research and generously share this knowledge with all of us who come here. But I just felt I needed to back away for a while to try and focus outside myself and my bc. However it is with great enthusiasm that I came back here to find so much activity! But also very sad to see that so many of us have lost children...I might have mentioned some time ago having lost my second child, Sam, when he was only 5 months old. He would be 21 now, but to me he is a tiny smiling baby face like his photo on my bedside table. I don't wish to dwell on this now, just to let others know that there are many of us who understand.
Notself thank you so much for that wonderful poem.....truly beautiful.
Don't have time to answer all the things I'd like to, but had fun doing the 'test', scoring 87%...I know it's not 93%, you'll have to make allowances for the fact that I'm not from the U.S!!
To add on to what someone wrote above about how Native Americans were made NOT to speak their own language...this is a well known ploy used by all colonisers..although I would not say that we suffered at all in comparison with Native Americans, in Malta, being a British colony for well over 100 years, we were unable to get very far without English, and at the convent school I was sent to in the 1960s, we were made to pay a penny every time we spoke a word of Maltese!
Sunflowers I LOVE the Jabberwocky, a perfect example of English 'nonsense' rhyme. I used to read it to my children and we had a wonderful edition with brilliant illustrations, pictures of the 'uffish boy' and suchlike, but I can't remember who the illustrator was..will try and find the book, I know I have it somewhere.
Have any of you heard of a writer called Alain de Botton who has written a book called Religion for Atheists? I happened to come across a reference to it and its subtitle is: A Non-Believer's Guide to the Uses of Religion. In the blurb it says that de Botton is not interested in arguing for or against the existence of god, nor does he believe there is any point in declaring all religion to be useless..on the contrary, according to the blurb at least, he is saying that religion has uses, and does certain things well, like creating communities, structures and rituals which help us during trying times, etc..I haven't read the book, but intend to get it on my kindle when it is made available in a week or so... has anyone heard of it?
Well that's enough catching up for now, it's late here and I have to get up for work tomorrow... and on Friday I'm going to Venice for 5 days with a girlfriend to celebrate the end of my treatment. Buona Notte e arrivederci!
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Believe it or not, I scored 100 percent on that test, but I totally guessed on the last question. I knew it wasn't Billy Graham, though, so it was even odds. And I'd covered a prayer/religion in school issue while a newspaper reporter, so I probably had an unfair advantage there. <g>
During my second bout of BC, I remember once using an incredibly odd turn of phrase when crying on my husband's shoulder. I said: "I don't want to be dead yet." And, of course, no one does. I was only 48 then, so I was pretty darned peeved about the possibility.
--Cindy
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Maria
All good wishes for the nest stage of your journey - VENICE. How lovely. I'm sure every one understands as I do, the imortance of "getting away" from the daily, or almost daily, thoughts of bc. SO wonderful you have finished your active treatment. I hope we will hear from you, now and again, if only to send us picture of VENICE, and your thoughtful words. ENJOY EVERY DAY, thank you for all you've contributed to this wonderful thread.
Sunflowers
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Have fun in Venice...I love Italy...here are some pix I took my gosh it has been 12 years..wow does time fly...
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oooohhh...Venice...coooool! Have an awesome time!!!
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my 2 children toured Europe a few years back, compliments of my ex. (I was not invited)boohoo.
They both said that Venice was one of the highlites of their trip. They took pix but yours, SoCall LIsa, are post card worthy. Thanx for sharing them.
Well my trip to the Jersey shore ain't so bad.
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chef - I'd take a trip to ANY shore ( with peace of mind) over a trip anywhere with my ex
Tho I especially love the Atlantic from our side of it....do you live near the shore?
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SunfFlower
Peasce of mind is a vacation I'm sure we all need. My ex and I are good friends now ater 17 years of divorce. I don't love him but I do like him now. The opposit of our marriage. I would never concider taking a vacation with him. TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT.
I live an hour from the shore. I am concidering retiring there, but the winters are brutal.....OH, the winters are brutal here too.
Close yours eyes and we can swim the Atlantic together
ahhh...sun and surf 0 -
I like to swim. Can I join In? Ahhhh, I love the sound of the water when my ears are covered with it and I'm on my back looking at the blue sky and feel so at peace. Can you feel it yet?
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I can feel the gentle up and down of the waves and the motion of the currents. Can you hear the gulls?
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Diving under the waves and fighting the current. empowering. excilerating. exhausting.................Now I'm ready for some boardwalk food.....french fries, sausage and peppers,clams, lemonade. Lets take a ride on the carosel.
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Lets get back to the beach and feel the warm sand on our feet................Feel the sun on your face.
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hhhhmmmmmm...yummy thoughts - can taste the little bits of salt drying near my lips as I float in the sun - maybe time to get an "inner tube" like we used when I was a little kid living at the shore in CT - oooh..how HOT the black inner tube got - maybe there are plastic ones now - so you can keep your feet dangling in the water to stay cool...of course, if the beach is very rocky, best to wear your little red Ked sneakers... JOY, JOY, JOY....
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And the kids are collecting shells, rocks and the occasional slimy smelly thing... 0
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It's dusk at the beach..............the beach is abandoned................seaguls hunting for a morsel..............beach toys left behind......................the sound of the sea consumes me................alone and peaceful..............
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I'd like to come and hang out with you guys for a day on the beach, if you don't mind. Then I'm heading for the hills if anyone wants to join me. The mountains refresh me & fill me with so much joy!!!
I was born in the mountains and they are just such a deep part of who I am.
Here's a picture of the area where I lived taken on a spontaneous trip there last fall. Some day, one way or another, I will get back to the mountains I love!
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