Im bitchy, I moan, I groan.....anyway.

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Comments

  • mzmiller99
    mzmiller99 Member Posts: 220
    edited March 2009

    Oh, Dream - I'm so sorry that this damned disease can't give you a break. 

    Hugs,

    Susan

  • navygirl
    navygirl Member Posts: 369
    edited March 2009

    (((HUGS))) dream...I'm so sorry...I hate to say I never thought about the fact that my hospital doesn't have barf buckets around either?! My worst experience didn't involve puking but it was a messy clean up none the less...fortunately I too was too drugged up to care or remember much. There comes a point in time where you just could give a sh*t less.

    SOI...my cousin, her husband and her new baby are coming to visit this weekend. I'm not in a position to travel up north to see them so it's very sweet of them to make the trek so I can visit and see the new baby.

    I'm off to research progesterone...unless someone here can tell my why all the hormone drugs are centered around stopping estrogen in your body to prevent a reoccurance but none of them are for progesterone? My cancer was only 35% estrogen positive but 95% progesterone positive! I also want to look into the AI's because my onc says I should take them after my ovaries are out but that doesn't make sense to me since the point of taking my ovaries out is so that my body shuts down estrogen production. I find it hard to believe I could have enough estrogen from fat cells or food to make it worth taking another of these horrid drugs with all the side effects they give.

    Ramble..I'm done...Love you guys! Hope everyone is well tonight.

  • navygirl
    navygirl Member Posts: 369
    edited March 2009

    hahah, I just realized the pun I made about my worst experience...without really meaning too!

    Ooops, guess you all know what I did now...

  • flash
    flash Member Posts: 129
    edited March 2009


    EWB... A big that sucks and hope your day today was better.  If you ever want to roadtrip up my way.....

    Here's to minimal suckage for everyone in the next few days.

  • dreamwriter
    dreamwriter Member Posts: 678
    edited March 2009

    I am wearing a hat tomorrow.  I have to return to the scene of my crime.....   Thank golly I did not get anything on Sally.  At this rate I should be at my ideal weight by the end of March Break.  HAHAHAHAAH

  • hipchik47
    hipchik47 Member Posts: 113
    edited March 2009

    Ok, barf bags all around,  pinks ones.  Hugs dream  love Hippy

  • sueper13
    sueper13 Member Posts: 360
    edited March 2009

    traci, everyone--just a flyby to let you know all is well.  I am going on a spiritual retreat this weekend to a beautiful place in Mystic, CT and will be off line,

    Sorry for all the suckage and all the straws on the camels' backs.....I love all of you and I'll be back on Monday night to catch up.

    Love,

    Sue

    P.S. 27 days until I retire...Wink

  • navygirl
    navygirl Member Posts: 369
    edited March 2009

    Sue!!! It's so good to see you smiling back at me from your Avatar :)

    Mystic CT is a BEAUTIFUL town...if it wasn't for the cold I could live there for-ever! I hope you enjoy your retreat...I'm so psyched for you only having 27 days...will we still be able to refer to you as "my friend Sue, the Air Traffic Controller" ? I hope so...I'm sure Rock would like to still have the priviledge.

    This is a drive by for me as well...I have onc today and treatment tomorrow and work, chores, pets, exercise, etc in between so I won't be able to pop on much during the day I think...

    NO IOS you guys! It's going to be almost 70 in another day...time to break out the golf clubs and start breaking these new boobs into my golf swing!

  • navygirl
    navygirl Member Posts: 369
    edited March 2009

    Soooo, just sitting here waiting for onc to show up and be done with it. The fellow who came in seems to NOT want me to have any kind of yearly follow up with US or MRI because I "don't have any breast tissue"....uh, NO junior I had a skin and nipple sparing blm, I do still need to monitor myself! WTF are they thinking? Do they know that it can still come back? I'd feel l lot better listening to them if they didn't sound so stupid so often. Geesh.

  • otter
    otter Member Posts: 757
    edited March 2009

    navygirl, some of them sound stupid because they ARE stupid.  I hope the real deal comes in soon and tells you, "Yes, we are going to watch you like a hawk, because we care about you and want you to stay healthy!", and then you get to go home.

    Hugs...

    otter 

  • PinkyLee
    PinkyLee Member Posts: 427
    edited March 2009

    A big that sucks for all who need it.

    I have been off the board mostly since my exchange.  But thank God that is over and now I am praying for the fluff.  They fill my new bra's at a "d", but I had hoped for a "D".  The ps told me yesterday that he opted for more height than projection.  I truly wanted both.  I look at him not wanting to cry and said "I hope they get more than this".  To add to my disappointment, the left side is puckered.  I am so disappointed.  I am glad they are now soft, but I truly had hoped the lease I could have were voluminous foobs. 

    A while back to told the story of a friend who pass away and left a 14 yodaughter whose father went to court and told the judge the child came with a check.  Well the Aunt went back to court and finally the counselors and judge awarded the child to her aunt.  It was revealed in court that he had started bring beer to counseling sessions and offering it to the counselor and that he was not providing the child with any type of allowance.  When the judge questione him about the money for beer the judge told me he needed to tell the truth and admit he is spending the childs SSI.  When the aunt was award custody, he told the to come and get all of the child things because if he wasn't getting custody, he didn't want any of her belongings.  He rejected every other weekend visitation.  The story is sad, but the child is now where she wants to be.  She had never lived with her father since he walk out on the mother once she became ill.  He didn't deserve to get to live off of the mom's money because he wasn't around at all during her illness.

    I too have gone through the puking in the hospital and now when to do it.  My worst was after my masectory being wheeled down the hall and my SO holding his hands to keep it off my bandages.  I don't remember it all, but what I remember is that every visitor that came for two days had to catch puke.

  • KAK
    KAK Member Posts: 297
    edited March 2009

    Hi, my friends.  I'm soooo behind here & need to set aside time to catch up but just wanted to let you all know I'm alive & SUCKY!!!!!!  

    There's something that seems to happen to all of us when we get to that first six-month follow-up imaging/testing stage.  I think we begin to realize, when (or if) we get that first negative mamm since the start of our Big Adventure, how much we've been holding our breath, waiting for the other shoe to drop, fearing that we've still "got it," & how bloody, flipping exhausted we are from the whole thing.  That's certainly been true for me these last few weeks since the negative mamm.  I feel like crap.  I am an emotional bus wreck.  I'm so teary all the time, and of course my stupid anti-depressant has been making me nauseous after I take it, so I had to tweak it & try different stuff & finally I figured out I needed to take the time-release version.  So I got samples of that today from my pcp & I'm hoping it works because I soooooooo cannot be without an anti-depressant right now.   The drug in question is effexor, by the way, and I was getting the generic stuff & it just was not sitting well in my stomach no matter what I did, so that was just ducky because it was like having morning sickness, which is a good trick at age 54.  And I couldn't just switch back to good ol' zoloft, because there ISN'T any other anti-depressant to take while on tamoxifen because the rest of them inhibit tamoxifen metabolism.  Swell.

    Anyway, I'm looking up at the last post here from Pinky & I'm so glad to hear from you, Miss Pink, & I'm sorry you're having a hard time, too.

    I don't have to tell any of you how wearing it is to live with our mortality in our faces all the time.  I just feel soooooo worn down & worn out from the last several months.  Does this ever get better??   I just want to sit down & cry.  I want my mommy.   I want ice cream.  I want chocolate.  I want never to have had cancer in the first place.  I'm tired of being "brave."   @#$%*&^%@$

    Love you girls, though.

  • saint
    saint Member Posts: 583
    edited March 2009

    WhaSux?

    I, too, am still kicking & bitchin! Had scans today. All went well except the blown vein in my had which hurts like hell, but will pass. Results next Fri---thanx ahead of time for the week of prayers! 

    I have accepted another voluntary job at the shelter so that should explain my absence. I actually DID catch up here last nite, but fell asleep b4 I could post & now can NOT remember squat!! Typical..... Pinky---after reading your post I can only guess how popular you must have been with visitors!!!! BIG that SUX!

    KAK----HUGS---it sux, -whatcha gonna do?? I read a beautiful quote (that I can NOT remember) that basically says-if you allow yourself to worry about the unknowns of tomorrow, you have wasted today.

    I always say: If I let the beast ruin my day he wins! By God, I will NOT EVER let the beast win! I sure DO get tired of it ALL, but if I let myself go there & lament what is lost I loose what is not.......

    HUGS all--Be well & stay strong! 

  • mzmiller99
    mzmiller99 Member Posts: 220
    edited March 2009

    Wow - Saint and KAK!!  Good to hear from you both!  Saint, your quote is one of the things I remember when I first landed here.  (Probably because my daughter is a dancer.)

    Kathi - You said it!  Tomorrow you'll probably be your old chipper self (I hope), but it just wears you down so.  I'm having my first mammo at the end of the month, I can't imagine what I'll do if they find anything.  And, I guess I don't expect that there will be anything...yet. 

    The worst must be when everything's fine for years and then - BAM!  Just when you let your guard down.

     I'll join you in the chocolate...I just wolfed down a dish of ice cream!!  Which isn't making my jeans feel any looser!

    Hugs to you both.

  • otter
    otter Member Posts: 757
    edited March 2009

    Well, I was going to skip the ice cream tonight, because I really would like to lose those post-meno pounds I've gained.  But I think I'll have some just to cheer Kathi up.  And if it helps, I'll even put chocolate sauce on it.  It's quite a sacrifice, but I'll do it for a BC sister.

    otter 

  • saint
    saint Member Posts: 583
    edited March 2009

    That's true support!!!! Here here! Let's all make the sacrifice!!! 

  • Traci-----TripNeg
    Traci-----TripNeg Member Posts: 567
    edited March 2009

    I don't like ice cream. Or chocolate....Surprised

     Edited to say....OMG.....Otter????????? ((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))) missed you!

  • PinkyLee
    PinkyLee Member Posts: 427
    edited March 2009

    I plan on eating a fruit custard tart.

    Has anyone heard for LuAnn lately?  I haven't seen any post from her in a while.

  • dreamwriter
    dreamwriter Member Posts: 678
    edited March 2009

    Personally I like homemade rice pudding with cinnamon sprinkles

  • Jane_M
    Jane_M Member Posts: 932
    edited March 2009

    I'm with dream....but no raisins in the pudding.

    I didn't know that there were anti-depressants that were contra-indicated with Tamoxifen.  They are still trying to decide if I will take Tamoxifen or an AI.  I currently take Lexapro, Pamelor and Lamictal for depression.  It took my psychiatrists over a year to come up with the right "cocktail" that kept me from wanting to kill myself.  If I have to switch antidepressants, I'm not sure it would work.

  • badboob67
    badboob67 Member Posts: 236
    edited March 2009

    Dammit....I was so glad to see posts until I read all the suckiness going on.  GRRRRRRRRRRRR and "THAT SUCKS" y'all!

    Traci, I think we are twins who were separated at birth. I don't like ice cream or chocolate either! I thought it was some sort of heinous violation of the women's code not to like chocolate. Thank goodness I'm not alone. ;o)

    Pinky, LuAnn's posted a little lately. She had an IOS waiting to see the doctor today (posted on the mets section). That sucks about your foobs. You go through all the crap and the least you should get out of it is the size you want, dangit!

    Navygirl, you gotta remember: not everyone graduates with an "A" average. The jerk!

    Kak, sorry you're feeling rotten. I hope the new drugs are easier to handle.

    Dream, a super-duper sized "THAT SUCKS!" for you. I'm so sorry you're having such a rough time.

    My IOS: damned TAXOTERE has made the NEUROPATHY worse. The NEUROPATHY was the reason for the switch from ABRAXANE. So, I'm wondering if I'm going to be playing chemo-yahtzee trying to find one that won't cause NEUROPATHY or if I'll just have to deal with the fact that I can't feel anything from the knees down.  JOY.

    Don't forget to set your clocks forward tomorrow night!

    (((HUGS)))
    Diane

  • sherloc
    sherloc Member Posts: 893
    edited March 2009

    well after months and months away this thread is definately what I needed today. No absolute gripes, just an all around crappy day.

    A great big Hidey HO to OLD friends

    and a nice to meet you to new.

  • sherloc
    sherloc Member Posts: 893
    edited March 2009

    and might I add.....I will be happy to have anyones discarded ice cream.

  • Traci-----TripNeg
    Traci-----TripNeg Member Posts: 567
    edited March 2009

    Dream....gross...rice pudding? That sounds like an oxy-moron (sp?)

    (((Jane)))

    Diane...how you doing girl? Are you getting used to the ache yet? ((((hugs my twin)))))

    >>>>>>Passing all icecream to Sherloc....<<<<<<Wink

  • PinkyLee
    PinkyLee Member Posts: 427
    edited March 2009

    Major suck:

    My natural sister called today to tell me she has sores in her mouth and her vagina from her treatment.  I am not sure what type of treatment she is getting.  I know she had lumectomy in Feb and was due to start something soon.   I never had these problems since I never got chemo.  Our other sister had major problems prior to lossing her battle.  I don't know what to recommend she do for the sores.  I suggest proxide or champhore for her mouth, but I'm not sure about the other.  I was caregiver for my youngest sister as she lost her battle.  This was after the chemo stage.  I wasn't around then so have no idea what she did.  any help will do.

  • prayrv
    prayrv Member Posts: 362
    edited March 2009

    Well a hearty THAT SUX to all! 

    Traci, just pass the ice cream with chocolate syrup over this way please.  I'll wresle just about anyone for butter pecan.  It's funny that everyone is talking about ice cream (or left over ice cream) as my dh handed me his bowl cause he couldn't finish.  Weird. 

    For those with pain, aches and waiting for scan results, hugs and prayers.

    Trish 

  • sherloc
    sherloc Member Posts: 893
    edited March 2009

    I think I just might do bodily harm to someone for some ice cream...I've been at my daughters for a week and there isn't a stinkin thing in this house that doesn't say "organic", "soy", or "gluten free" and whatever. I WANT SOME CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!

     You would think I could deflate this beach ball that has taken up residence around my middle.

  • socallisa
    socallisa Member Posts: 10,184
    edited March 2009

    SHERLOC...SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!!!!!!!!!!

    Sending you an emergency supply of Chocolate ice cream with fudge sauce..

    with whole fat heavy whipped cream and a cherry on top

  • KAK
    KAK Member Posts: 297
    edited March 2009

    Oh, it's so good to read all your comments, even tho' there's so much suckyness going around.  Hugs to All!

    Otter, your willingness to make such a supreme sacrifice to support me in my time of suckage is truly noble.

    I'll eat everything everyone has mentioned so far.  Does that make me an omnivore??  I've been eating Girl Scout cookies this week, peanut butter sandwiches to be precise.  Anybody besides me fond of Grapenut custard??

  • GramE
    GramE Member Posts: 2,234
    edited March 2009

    That Sucks for all who need it.  I am having a Shamrock Shake from McD.   Since I am allergic to chocolate, I have to settle for this green drink.   HUGS,   Nancy