Im bitchy, I moan, I groan.....anyway.
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Thanks guys, esp. Ann.
Editing again because I type WAY too slow! Sheila, don't belittle your situation. It's not minor to YOU and that's what's important. Viv, I feel you on the dentist thing. I've put it off way too long.
I don't plan on letting him ANYWHERE near me. I was going for the expander/implant, on his recommendation, and waited the 6 months to a year he recommended. I know the complications are much riskier and severe in flap procedures with smokers...and I was told last year he'd prefer the same thing...quitting 3 weeks prior. I tried. i really did. but with some marital issues, the stuff with the dog and my son....there really IS no excuse i guess.
It just upsets me becuase he agreed 2 months ago when I made the appt to take my insurance. TriCare doesn't have anyone in the network in my area, so now I'll pretty much beg around for some one to accept a crappy insurance, and hopefully fairly soon. my husband deploys again in September.
Meh.I'll stop bitching for now.0 -
Sam408 and others still wondering - the answer to Shirley's dd's mystery necklace is on the "I can't get my act together" thread. Hilarious!!!
((((((((Hugs, Loki))))))))
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Popping in to send some hugs to everyone. My bitch today is sooooooo big, I cant even talk about it.
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Nicki, whatever it is, I'm sorry and THAT SUCKS!
Loki, that doctor is an asshole. Of course you should stop smoking, you know that, we all do, but that doesn't give him an excuse to lecture you in that condescending way while you are half-naked and looking for help to deal with the trauma of bc, the loss of a breast and reconstruction. I hope you find a ps who is a decent human being as well as a skilled surgeon.
Cristine, it SUCKS when all of this gets in the way of doing what we want/need to do with our kids! I missed my son's first-ever school play when I was recovering from surgery, among other things.
My minor bitch today is that I have a sore throat and a bizarre hoarse voice, for no apparent reason. If it prevents me from having my LAST chemo tx tomorrow then it wil become a MAJOR bitch, though.
I hope today is less sucky than yesterday for everyone!
Lauren
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Lauren, that sucks!! (That was a minor "that sucks" since you classified your bitch as minor).
Sheila, you don't need Damnitol, you need Symmetria. THAT SUCKS!!
Loki, what a jerk of a monkey faced power junkie that condescending money hungry ps is!! He doesn't DESERVE to work on your recon!!
My bitch today is I am going to have my hair buzzed off at 1 o'clock central (be thinking about me ladies, I'm having a hard time with it). How can it be harder for me to lose my hair than it was to lose a breast? That makes no sense. I think it's the idea that this makes it not my choice to tell people or not what is going on in my life right now. And the fact that I was vain about my hair for years. Oh, well I am leaving in plenty of time to get some quality retail therapy in........
Hugs to all who bitch and moan,
Sue
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Loki- That Dr is an A$$hole!!!! I smoked the night before my surgery and actually had quit for years but recent stress over the last 3 years brought me back into the bad habit.
Not one of my Dr's gave me crap! Not even the heart dr when I went into cardiac ablation said a word.(BTW heart problem had nothing to do with smoking) Now the paper work said not to smoke or drink right before surgery so I had 6 beers and probably 10 cigs the night before my bilateral! LOL! Okay, not the healthiest way to go into surgery. But that is what I did and when the nurse asked me about it in pre-op I said" Yes, I had lots of beer and alcohol but not after midnight"! She laughed and said I do not blame you I probably would have drank more the night before they cut off my boobs!!!!!
So I will be quitting this rediscovered stress reliever in August when I go to the beach for two weeks. It is the most relaxing time of the year for me so that is why I decided to do it then.
I would sooooo find another dr!!! Did he really not focus on the "smoking issue " when you were doing the boob job? Then you know it is just an excuse to give you shit because he wants you to seek another dr because of your insurance.
Find someone else! Talk to your local cancer navigator or hospital cancer center see if any ladies have listed themselves as references for dr's and find out who likes who in the pool of "ego headed" dr's in your area. (I say this because so many are ego maniac's. My dd is in school biology and pre-med, planning on become a dr, she is not an ego head yet, but will probably become one) JK! I love my dr and he is not an ego head!
Good luck to you! Do not go back to that A$$!!!
Dani
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OMG, Loki, I haven't read your posts through all the way, yet, but... I feel for you girl, because, I also have been dealing with TRICARE, and it is such a bitch!!
Guess what happened last time when I went to see my pcp?? I asked for referrals (this includes getting it cleared thru Tricare!) to see another specialist, one for my eyes, now that I have to take Tamoxifen and I also have a family hx of cataracts... so, anyway, I thought I might be able to get cleared to have annual eye exams, since Tricare only allows them once every two years. The stupid dr. only called ONE dr. to refer me to, and they just tried to get me an appt... I can DO that part on my own, thank you very much! So, they just called me and said, "we called Dr. Brown, and .... he doesn't take Tricare." DUH! I could have told them that!!
I feel for ya, 'cause it SUCKS, man!!!
Harley
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Dani, that's what I did the nite before my surgery only my drink of choice was wine! My surgeon said "you don't look so good" and I said "I have a hangover." LOL!
Sue, I'll be thinking about you today girl. That's funny about the retail therapy. I'm just sick to my stomach about you buzzing your hair. I didn't do that. I couldn't. I was begging the chemo god's up until the night it started coming out, to let me be one of the one's that didn't lose their hair. ((((((((hugs))))))))
Hi everybody! c y'all later.
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ps (((((nicki))))) what's up???
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Loki,, That PS really sucks!!!! Don't go back to HIM!!! Hope you find a caring, nice one to do the reconstruction. What a power trip.
Dani, You crack me up "yes I had lots of beer and alcohol but not after midnight" Traci, you too. That is too funny. The night before my bilateral I had 2 glasses of wine and then stopped but I really wanted to crank it up a notch and do some tequila shots. I just could not handle a big hangover and have to be at the hospital at 6am so I whimped out.
This insurance stuff really SUCKS!!!! I'm Canadian so I don't understand the whole thing. It seems like it is a lot more work for you guys to have to deal with. It should not be that way as you don't need the added stress of all of this insurance CRAP. That SUCKS!!!!!
Kerry
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Well, so far, Loki is the front-runner for worst suckiness of the day.
Loki, words escape me, and that's rare. What an arrogant, flaming a**hole S.O.B.! What a prima donna! Your post nearly had me in tears. There is no way I would ever go near that man again. No way. If he was the last PS on the planet, I'd go flat rather than let him do my recon. OK, so I am flat 'cause I chose not to have recon. But it wasn't because of an arrogant, pin-headed, ________ _________ (fill 'em in, folks) plastic surgeon who thought he was god's gift to women desperately in need of replacement boobs. What a boob, himself. Sheesh. I guess I found the words after all.
Sue(per13), I will be thinking of you as your hair is hitting the floor. I never did shave mine, and I sometimes think I should have. My dh and I discussed that this morning at breakfast (with me bare-headed). He thinks my "fringe", ugly as it is, is better than a totally bald head. The fringe hangs out around the edge of caps & scarves, kind of like a "fall" or those wiglet things. I guess if he's OK with it, I'm OK with it. After all, I am not the one looking at it most of the time.
The only complaint I have today is that I am having a hard time getting off my butt and doing something useful, or even fun. I feel fine (except for the scalp bumps, of course), and it's a beautiful day. The sky does not get this blue here ... but it is. I have turned into a sloth, I guess. It would take a cattle prod to get me moving sometimes. I am blaming it on chemo. It couldn't possibly be my fault.
otter
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{{{{{{{ LOKI }}}}}}}} OMG, I am SOOO angry at that SOB PS ... there's just NO EXCUSE for that a&&hole's behavior and he shouldn't be allowed to touch another woman ever .. I'd report him to his superiors. Send him this too:
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Lauren, congrats on going for your LAST chemo tomorrow!!! Wooohoo! It feels like chemo is going to last forever, doesn't it?
Loki, that doctor is such a jerk. I had a terrible experience with a PS that I won't go into, but I know I won't go back to that guy.... I don't care if he's supposed to be the best PS on earth! I hope your new doc will be more compassionate!
Sue, sorry about the buzz. That sucks. I hope you find that it's not as bad as you anticipate. I did hate wearing wigs in the summer time last year, but lots of gals really like the scarves and some of us go commando. I felt weird without a wig, so I went that route. I was able to toss it to the curb in February and now my hair is long enough for me to pass as an earthling. Anyway, my thoughts are with you!
A big that sucks to all..... I have to stop and go to work now which sucks for me!!! I'd rather stay here and play with you gals!!!
Miss S
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Loki - I am SO mad at that so-called doctor I could spit. He should be arrested for sexual assault....to be pulling a power trip while he was physically examining you is a type of assault!!! Big important doctor, asserting his power over your life....grrrrrr.....call the cops!!! Makes me SO mad. That is more that just inappropriate, it is criminal.
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I thought all PS's were that way. : )
My sister's called her fat and mine said "you told me to stop the expansion" when I complained about my results. I said "so, this is it? And he said "yep". Lovely. I canceled my last appointment with him and won't go back.
Sorry Loki. (cool name)
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Dang, it’s been a real suck fest around here!
Brenda – hope your ankle, knee and cut are better.
Yogi – I like Sue’s idea about marbles in your mailbox. If they come around the same time everyday, you might want to plant yourself in plain view but not too close with a camera in hand. Scare the crap out of them (and get their plate number to give to the po po)
Otter and Sheila – I’m convinced people are just plain crazy. Stealing someone’s money should land the person under the daggone jail IMHO
Deb – hope your headache is gone…
Shopmama – Sux about your insurance denying your MRI. Our health care system absolutely rots. I’m hopeful that whomever gets elected in November will at least try to address it in a way that makes sense…
Sue – what kind of fool writes a check for $360 billion?!? What an idiot. Will be thinking about you today with your hair. Hugs!
Casino Girl – hope you get some sleep! And be careful driving!!
Shirley – U ok?
Julia – whoo-hoo on the biopsy! Champaign is in order, I think…
Pearl – Curses the laptop gods!! Don’t you hate when you lose all your stuff?!?
Christine – sucks about your laptop. Hubbys can be just so, well, husband-y sometimes…
Loki – That PS you saw needs to be slapped really hard. What the heck made him think it was ok to treat you like he did!?! Too bad you didn’t throw up on him…
Nicki – Whatever is going on with you – it SUCKS!!!
Dani and Lisa – love the way you ladies think. Should make t-shirts out of your pearls of wisdom…
Lauren – congrats again on your very last chemo!Traci - how's the moving coming along?
My bitch for today is two fold: a friend's 15-year-old brother was shot and killed last night. Just in the wrong place at the wrong time. So sad...
I see my doc today for the sinus CT results. If nothing is there, I'll scream. If something is there, I'll scream, too. it all just sucks to high heaven...
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well...since i haven't moved all day from the recliner that i sleep in, its kind of hard fo me to bitch about anything. well, i could bitch about having to get up and pee or let the dogs out, but that would be pretty damn petty considering what you all have going on....so i just have to give you all a big "that sucks" for your stuff.
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flyrzfan,
THAT SUCKS that you've been in the recliner all day!!! THAT SUCKS that you don't have someone there to go pee for you and let the dogs out (wait--that sounded weird)...........
Felicia--that really, really sucks about your friend's son. What a world, huh?
Anybody I missed, THAT SUCKS!!!
The hair ended up being not so bad. It turns out I have a pretty head....
Love you guys,
Sue
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I know we've been here before but OMG insurance sucks!
I've been battling with my ins co since last June over my radiation treatment. They have paid for most of it except for some films, consultation and the daily treatments. Their reasoning is that the daily treatments are in excess. I have explained over and over to them that I had one treatment a day and that is normal. I sent in a written appeal in February and last week I got a letter from them stating they agree that their original denial was in error. They said I would get follow up correspondence shortly. Well, I got it today and they've changed their minds and are again denying the charges. . .WTF? Now they're stating that nothing in the documentation shows that the treatments were medically necessary. . .are they crazy, they paid for everything but the daily treatments! They even paid for the last 3 treatments that were the boost doses. How can they pay for those and still say the treatments leading up to that were not medically necessary??? I had a complete meltdown. I'm so tired of dealing with this. Last week I was rejoicing that it had finally been fixed and now today this.
Aetna has repeatedly told me I don't have to pay the hospital for these charges because they're a network provider and have to accept what Aetna pays. The hospital doesn't agree with that (and I have to agree with them) and has now turned me over to collectors. The outstanding bills are a little under $14,000.
When I spoke to Aetna today I was informed that my plan allows for a Level 2 appeal and that's what I now have to do. I asked what a Level 2 does and was told that it forces a Director to look at the claim. . .so who's looking at it now??? I also have to get a letter from my rad onc documenting the medical necessity of the treatment. Do they really think someone would go through radiation just for the hell of it. Now I can't seem to stop crying over it.
As if what we're going through isn't enough, we have to deal with sucky insurance too??? Sorry to ramble on but I feel better getting it off my chest.
I'm still looking for that Damnitol script!
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Sheila - that SUCKS! Does your hospital have some type of patient advocate you can turn the billing problems over to? Another tip, don't start paying even ONE PENNY of things you think are not your responsibility. I had a lawyer tell me that if you do make a small payment that you are, in effect, saying the bill is yours. It gives you less right to fight it later I guess....
Sorry you have to deal with this. Insurance companies SUCK
Deb C
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Sheila,
Aww, don't cry. THAT SUCKS!!!!!
Glad coming here makes you feel better, it's amazing, isn't it? I am sure I will be joining you in your rants about insurance soon. So far I've been pretty lucky. Beaurocracy sucks!!
Feel better,
Sue
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Sheila, DebC has a great suggestion. The patient advocate at the hospital should at the very least get them to hold off on collections until you exhaust your appeals, if not help you with the appeals. I also don't think it could hurt to call your state insurance commissioner (Indiana?) -- and let Aetna know you're calling the insurance commissioner!0
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Sheila,
I have Aetna too. I have a "case management nurse consultant". Her name is Barbara Swere. Actully, she has helped me on one or two occasions.
I am sure it is by location but, she can no doubt put you in touch with someone in your area. Her # is 727-781-8200.
I hope that helps girl cuz I know....insurance is a BITCH. I pay $656 for my now. Monthly. Jerks.
c y'all later.
TraciEdited to add: The move is going very, very slowly. I had no idea it was so filthy under my bed.
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Sheila: They wont pay for the radiation treatments? That sucks and you will be able to win the appeal. You must win the appeal. As far as bill collectors go - with the new laws, all you have to do is put in writing you refuse to pay and they should stop calling you. They can be fined a pretty penny if they persist.
I saw on 60 minutes that insurance companies have made a practice of delay and deny. Sucks big time. Tracy gave you some wonderful advice.
Thanks to everyone else for the big hearty "that sucks" for me. You all made me chuckle in one way or another. I love this thread - and thanks.
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i haven't posted in a while, not because i had no bitches...just busy with family and health problems. this is a real bitch. some may remember my situation with pet scan hot spots and positive biopsy with questions as to whether or not it was bc mets or something else. so onc suggested i get consults with sloan kettering, fox chase and others. went to first two. just got final report from fox chase and yes it is bc and yes hormone receptor - and her2+. now for the kicker. our insurance is changing. i told them in march and they said they don't accept aetna (because of too many bad experiences) but when plan was explained i was told "we'll work with you". and onc said call when you decide on what treatment you want to go with. so i called today and guess what. was told oh she thinks you're not seeing her anymore. i said no and was asked well didn't your insurance change. i explained whole thing ONCE AGAIN. then bitch said well i'll have to ask her if she'll see you and if insur. doesn't pay you'll be responsible for everything. well hell herceptin is over $3000. per. they never called back like she said she would. my gut tells me onc is cutting me loose. so here i am with frickin her2 aggressive cells in my belly and no treatment since beginning of jan. AND NO DOC???? well now isn't that just great. and of course she wouldn't even refill the 30 lousy xanax she gave me in feb. and my family and friends tell me to stay calm. ok, i'll just do that.
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jerseymaria,
AAWWW..... THAT SUCKS!!
So sorry to hear about your sad news.{HUGS}
Harley
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jerseymaria,
Put your snail mail address on here (or PM me) and I'll send you some Xanax--it makes me too sad, had to switch to Ativan.
Seriously.
Your news sucks. I am so sorry you are having to go through this at all, much less with insurance/onc hassles.
Sue
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It sucks that we have to have an IT SUCKS thread! But it's a great way to blow off steam. I am blessed to have wonderful insurance so I can't complain there. As for Loki's PS...tell him to take a flying flip! What a jerk!
I posted my newest issue on the high risk thread but...crap...it sucks! I want this crap to stop. I had my bone scan today and should get my results in the next few days. No biggie there...I hope. I spoke with a genetic counselor today and she's quite concerned with my family history. I have an appointment Monday morning to get my blood work done and should have results in 4 weeks. 4 weeks???? WTF??? If I test positive they will recommend I have all my female plumbing removed. D@mn...more freaking surgery. Who needs to diet...I keep losing weight as they take parts of me away...
Linda
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Traci - Thanks for the number. I'm going to give her a call tomorrow and see if she can hook me up with someone here. Although this episode is about to get the best of me because it's been going on so long, I must admit it's the first real problem I've had with Aetna. I retired from a great company with really good insurance benefits. It just seems that when Aetna digs in it's nearly impossible to change their mind. But I'm not giving up.
jerseymaria -- That sucks. During my journey I've run across several drs that wouldn't accept my insurance and I think we're going to start seeing more and more of that. Not just for Aetna, but all ins cos. I'm not sure how they expect people to pay these enormous bills.
Linda -- What a sucky way to diet. Keeping my fingers crossed you get all good results and don't require more surgery.
Thanks to everyone who offered advice on my insurance situation. I'm going to make some calls tomorrow and get the ball rolling on this again. Aetna doesn't realize who they're dealing with. . .I'm definitely not fighting them alone, I can feel you all around me.
Deb - That is a great bit of advice to not pay anything. I haven't because I know for certain I don't owe for this treatment. But I never thought about the fact that making a payment could be seen as admitting responsibility.
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Hello and flinging a big "THAT SUCKS" to all who need it right out of the gate!
Sheila - another idea for your insurance woes (I had thought about doing this myself yesterday), but I think the American Cancer Society has a link for help about dealing with insurance. You can type "insurance" into the search and it will give you other links. But one thing I read was that you can contact the consumer advocacy office of the government agency that oversees your insurance plan. I think that means whether it is state or federal. It might be time to bring others into your fight. Go, girl!
jerseymaria - I wanted to ask if your onc had already treated you. If so, she may be obligated to continue to provide treatment for you until/unless you find a new one or her office finds you a new one. You could check with your state agency that licenses physicians and see if there is any legislation about that. There are certainly medical ethics that apply and some states have turned ethics codes into laws. Loki this could certainly apply for you too. You could SO file an ethical complaint against that SOB ps!
I don't have too much to gripe about today. Got to gripe to a friend at work ABOUT work, so don't have much there. And the kids picked up on the fact that mom was about to have a meltdown, so they started behaving.
Wishing everyone less suckiness tomorrow...
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What in the world is wrong with insurance companies and doctors? This really sucks big time.
Jerseymama: If I were you, I would make an appointment with your onc and talk directly to him/her. Sad - that staff members cannot show more empathy when someone is dealing with breast cancer. I know I would be going crazy if I had to change oncs in the middle of treatment.
Hugs to everyone.
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