Hair Hair Hair - Another question
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Hi gang, I know this is silly to keep begging for words of wisdom, but tomorrow is week 7 and all I have is some sparse bird fuzz and stubble. And zits from ingrowns. I'm really miserable: itchy, cold...when does this show get on the road??
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MHP, so sorry for your discomfort, perfectly understandable. My hair really didn't grow much til after 5-6 months. Zits can be zapped maybe with the zit creams? I'm waiting for you to write back in a few months that you have such FULL CURLY hair, you don't know what to do with it! Let us know! Best to you~~~juli
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I started chemo (4 rounds of A/C) in July - shaved my head when it came out by the hand full, two weeks in. I have had seven rounds of Taxol (with four more to go) but my hair started to come in as soon as I was done with the A/C! I love rubbing my head and feeling hair! I just got the hand mirror so I could look at the back last week and was pleasantly surprised!
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Stephanie, you have a nice head'o'hair coming back! That's how mine looked at first, straight and gray...then curly, colored back to brunette. Thx for the pix, lookin' good! KUDOS ~juli
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I started losing my hair exactly 14 days after my 1st chemo treatment August 2009 and my hair started growing back immediately 2 wees after my last chemo treatment October 2009. Today I still have it short, because I fell in love with it. There are days that I miss my long hair, but I love the new short hairdo.
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My hair started to fall out about 18 days after my first chemo. I am now on the 7th day of the second one. Still hanging on to the final strands. It is hopeful that it would start to grow back as soon as I am done with all this. Thanks for sharing your pics. My hair was always very fine and I am really worried about how it will come back. My mom now 84 has so little hair and my husband has told me he will be freaked out if it comes back like hers. I assured him no matter how it comes back I will make it look as good as I can with straitening and color and whatever else.
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Stephanie you will have a head full of hair in no time! Wish mine was growing that quickly. I'm 16 weeks post and I'm just getting full coverage, little patchy in the front, seems like the arimidex has slowed the rate of growth a bit but I have faith I will get there.
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Carroll....your DH will NOT freak out however your hair grows in. You just need his support, no matter HOW your hair looks. I know how lucky I am that my BF did not care when I was bald, hair thinning, curly hair, straight hair, no makeup (sweats, ugh on makeup!). We need to stress the importance of accepting us now, things change...would YOU say that to HIM if he lost all his hair (btw: BF had a hair 'rug' when I met him, I convinced him to just take it off, he's a handsome bald man~~that also convinced his Dad to do the same thing...SOOOO much easier!) ~juli
Hey, if WE have to adapt to our unwilling changes to our bodies, so do they.
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I couldn't agree with Juli more. I think it's the idea of change that freaks people out, but love is love. Women give it a lot more unconditionally in this world, where women's looks are at such a premium!
I'm moaning a lot about my hair, because for me, it is a signifier of illness. But, I realize I'd prefer to be bald and myself than the mousy-brown, mid-length, drab-a-thon I realize I was before. I wish society were a little less rote about attractiveness!
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Stephanie - not to discourage you but I was on the exact schedule as you are and my hair was growing back about like yours -- then about mid way thru the Taxol it stalled and did not grow anymore until I was finished. Just don't give up the hope if that happens to you. Now I have about an inch and a half and it turned darker. Still have the gray but not as much. I love rubbing my head too - so soft.
Blessings - Carolyn
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Melbell,as soon as i had some peach fuzz i ditched the hats.I hate wearing anything on my head,and have always been that way.So when i saw the peach fuzz,i went Commando.Just made sure i had on makeup and nice earrings.I didn't wear a lot of makeup either,just eyebrows cause i didn't have any,nor did i have lashes,so just eyebrows and lipstick.I figured if it made anyone uncomfortable to see me that way,that that was their problem,and tough sh**.
Kathi
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LOL .... thanks Carolyn, hopefully mine will just keep growing! But I've been forewarned - just in case
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Today is 21 days past my first treatment (TCH) tomorrow will be my 2nd treatment. I had my niece buzz my head this evening. I left my bangs so they can be seen under a hat/scarf. She was surprised at the amount of hair I have been losing but she said it isn't as bad as she thought, there are no noticible bald spots..but not to worry they will be coming. How long did it take you to lose it completley. I ask because I am worried about my girls and need to prepare for the to not see me completely bald.
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Basia - once my hair started falling out it was gone within a week
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I never actually got rid of the stubble. I had it shaved down, then actually used some hair remover lotion (3 times) hoping to get a slick / bald head. That never happened for me - it always felt like sandpaper ..... then started growing back after about six weeks.
How old are your girls? Surely by having it buzzed this evening, that will prepare them for any more hair loss to come (?)
My 22/yr. old daughter watched via Skype as I got shaved (I took my laptop to the salon) and she started to cry .... then laugh at the same time; saying "I was afraid you'd not be pretty - but now that I see you're still pretty - it's ok"
I hope it's ok with your kids too {hugs}
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i had such a bad week. My eyebrows and lashes came out to, it kinda makes you look sick i think. My wig is itchy and uncomfortable and i like to just wear scarves. I see kids staring at me in the hallway... i think the right words to describe it is embarrassing and unconfident. I like going on this topic every morning and reading about the hope you all have, it gives me some hope too. I wish teenagers were more understanding about it, doctors and psychologists kept telling me that theyll support me no matter what. But they don’t. I guess i am happy that i am the one who has to deal with this instead of someone i love facing it. i cant even watch tv because all i can think about is i wish i had their hair. They have hair and i don’t. Ahh!
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sorry Erin, I hated losing my brows and lashes too. Thankfully though, I am not defined by my hair - just as I choose not to be defined by cancer. I like the patch that I saw, saying "It's a detour, not a road block!" And the detour is temporary . . . . we'll get back on the main road before long.
Hang in there {hugs}
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At 16 weeks, I stopped wearing my wig. Now at 24 weeks, I have about 3 inches of thick beautiful curly hair. I did color it. Soon you will too.
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Saw a great tshirt at my chemo appt the other day: My Oncologist Does My Hair
I went for a wig consult, I also was told that it could be done with less than 4".
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Erin
I hope you can surround yourself with a few friends who will be there for you. I had several and it made all the difference in the world.
The hair loss was not a big deal for me as I love playing dress up -- so the wigs were fun! However as time went on I did get tired of them. Try a wig liner to help with the itching. But have fun with the different looks you can now try. You'll never have a time like this again - none of us would shave our heads except for something like cancer tx. Go for the crazy scarf look too! There are a lot of helps on-line about how to tie them and sometimes it takes just the right length & width to get that look you want.
As for the confidence, here's my 2 cents worth -- I think it goes up and down based on how your feeling. Generally we don't feel so great during tx and our confidence takes a hit. Then we don't look so good either and it takes a bit more work to look your best. You'll get it back though - just like the hair, eyelashes and the brows.
Sure wish you didn't have to go through this, your way to young. But you will gain a lot too. You'll grow in ways very few of those your age do. This may not be any consolation now -- most things aren't until we look back on them. Hang in there, a lot of us here will be urging you on as you fight this.
Thx for sharing with us, Blessings, Carolyn
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Erin, I can't imagine how I would feel at your age. You are far too young to be experiencing this. But you are at an age that experimenting with your look is acceptable and nobody will think twice about it. Take advantage, go for a goth look one day and a preppie look the next and so on till you find what works for you. Kids can be mean, and teenagers are the worst so stick with your few close friends, they will support you no matter what. You will see who really matters in your life after this experience and in all honesty that is a good thing, you wont need to waste energy on the people that don't matter.
It is only hair,It will grow back. I know easy for me to say even though I cry in the shower every day as I see the hair clogging up the drain.
Hang in there. How many more treatments are you getting?
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I feel like you guys are all talking to me thanks. I am waiting as the last strands fall out.
But guess what I am still me and I look cute in hats darn it!
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LOL - Carol 2 -- stay you, cute and keep the hat industry in business. I never looked good in hats.
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I think that the world is made up of two kinds of people: those who look good in hats, and those who don't. I belong to the second group
. Fortunately, I didn't look too bad in a scarf, so they were a regular part of my wardrobe this summer. ((((Erin)))) Things will get better.
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Carrol, I'm sure you look great in hats, keep it going for as long as you can.
Ginger, my girls are almost 4 and get very upset with any and all changes in their lives, this isn't easy for me or them. I am so glad I kept the bangs, they aren't freaked out by the new look. I hope i keep the stuble like you did, think it may be easier for my kids instead of being completely bald.
Dutchgirl, at least you fit into one of the catagories, I look horrible in both.
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Basia: that sounds like me, crying when looking at the hair in the shower drain.
Carrol, you are at the worst stage as the last strands fall.
I lost my hair this time last year. The worst part for me was the anticipation/dread of the hair loss and I certainly cried the day it started to fall out (day 16 of chemo). It all pretty much fell out in a week. Then it was over. I stopped crying, at least about my hair! Being bald made it so much easier to get ready in the morning. Just a quick shower, rub the of my head with a towel, pop on the wig and go. I didn't need to worry about a bad hair day or shaving my legs. In the beginning, I never thought I'd get used to looking at my bald head in the mirror.
To all you ladies going through hair loss at the moment, remember what Stephanie said above "It's a detour, not a road block!"
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yes, it's true, some look good in hats, others, no--when I was a kid, my neighbor called me "hatsy"! I ran around with some kind of hat on all the time. I look great in hats. I look awful in scarves. Something about the way it cuts across my head and accentuates my rather large nose!
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Erin, I can't imagine going through this at your age. But go through it you must, so try and have some fun with it. You are young enough that you can get away with doing some funky, fun stuff like hot pink wigs or hats with outrageous sayings.
I have never liked my hair, it's curly and gets frizzy in the Alabama humidity. It is so nice not to have to worry about humidity, not to care if it's raining, and I do look good in hats. I'm 53 years old and have been called "cute" more times in the last month than ever in my life. I have a wig, but I've never worn it. Chemo is giving me major hot flashes, and I don't want a hot, itchy wig on my head.
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Erin - I too cannot believe how young you are and dealing with this. I thought I was too young at 40!
I wish I could say I have the courage of a lot of the women here who walk around with no hair. As far as I am concerned, no one other than my mother will ever see me like this. Part of it is that I do not want the attention - the stares, the comments, no matter how well-intended. I just want to go about my life with some normalcy. Part of it too is vanity. I had gorgeous hair - it has always been my best feature. Dark, long, thick and naturally curly/wavy. And there was a ton of it. It shedded for about three days (starting exactly 14 days post treatment just like they say) then in one shower about 80% of it fell out. I cried for hours. I cried more than when the doctor told me I had BC. I still cry about it sometimes. Heading into my 3rd treatment and I have not lost it all, but it is so much that I may as well be completely bald.
The only thing getting me through this is my wig. I decided early on that I was getting a human hair wig. I figure I will need it for at least a year, so it was a worthy investment for me. If you have the financial means to do it, I recommend this wig or another one by this company:
http://www.headcovers.com/12243/isabella-by-jon-renau-wigs-human-hair-monofilament/
As much as I would rather have my real hair, I have to tell you that this wig is GORGEOUS! My own hair has never looked so good and it takes all of about 1 minute to get ready each morning. I had a wig stylist cut some layers in it to look like my own hair (she was expensive but worth it). I never thought it would be possible, but it really looks like my own hair, but with a new and better cut and prettier (no dry ends, no oily mess when not washed every day).
I am using a roll-on adhesive that the website above sells to help keep it in place. I use it along the hair line on my forehead and a little at the base of my skull and it holds the wig nicely, and yet is easy to remove the wig at teh end of the day and washes right out.
I plan to stick with a wig until I get about 3-4 inches of hair back and then I am going to try clip in extensions until my own hair grows back to its pre-chemo length. Yes, I have this all planned out - ha! I am sure these will be a complete pain to deal with, but I dont want to damage my newly growing hair with other types of extensions.
To my surprise, I feel very normal with the wig on. In fact, I probably have more hair confidence now than before because I know the hair looks great. No out of control frizz on rainy day. . . no worrying about coloring it because the gray roots are growing in. . . no crazy hair days because did not feel like blowing my hair out in the morning.
So, long story, short: if you are able to purchase a nice, human hair wig, it may really help you like it has me. That said, you are a beautiful girl and you probably look amazing with or without hair. Good luck with your treatment!
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Erin - My heart is breaking for you. What a horrible thing to go through at your age. I know you said you don't like to wear your wig, but maybe you should try some others to see if they work better. My wig is the only thing getting me through this. It is a human hair wig with a lace cap (not the lace front type, but a cap). It is slightly itchy but not bad. I have some other "for fun" wigs that are much worse with the itchiness, so I think the way it is made makes a big difference. I highly recommend the wig in the link below. It is gorgeous and with a cut, it looks almost exactly like my own hair, but slightly better (no dry ends, etc.). It is expensive, but I think it is totally worth it as I would otherwise be stuck inside for the next year.
http://www.headcovers.com/12243/isabella-by-jon-renau-wigs-human-hair-monofilament/
You are so gorgeous in your picture. I hate that you are going through something that makes you feel like you are not beautiful.
If I can figure out a way to do it, I am sending a private message to you.
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