Stop Smoking Support Thread
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OK MT, back in action. I was able to successfully log into the site. I think I was putting my full email address in and not getting anywhere. Oh, I just love getting old!
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So here's your chuckle for the day. When I was working full time, I would do my grocery shopping at lunch and leave the perishables in the office fridge. I always put my keys in the fridge too so I wouldn't forget to take the food home. You can't imagine the number of times I went crazy at the end of the day because I couldn't find my keys.
I'm worried about LisaMarie. I sure hope she is doing OK.
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Bosum and MT, welcome to my world .... it's good that we can admit it. I've done lots of dumb shit but really think I'm right! Yes, LM, hope you are o.k.
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Hello All! Haven't posted on here in a few years. It's been so long I couldn't remember my login or password so had to create a new account. I'm embarrassed to report that I am still smoking after all these years. I just lost my sister in law suddenly & unexpectedly last month. No warning signs and she did not know she was sick. Results showed she had metastatic lung cancer. She never even knew. We are all devastated yet here I am, still smoking. I can't seem to build motivation and am starting to think this will never happen for me. I am one of those "jump out of bed and smoke" before I can start my day. I am at my wits end. That being said, reading on some older posts I see that several of you that I do remember are finally smoke free which is a huge insipiration! I remember LisaMarie (we had texted a few years back) and so, so happy to hear you are approaching 2 years!!!!
I know I have to build motivation but I am struggling. I am BRCA-2 positive and have put mastectomy w/recon off for 5 years now.
Any words of wisdom, advice, encouragement, anything - is appreciated! SO down in the dumps. I also have a significant panic disorder and when I think about quitting, it causes worse anxiety and I smoke more. I know there is no magic pill and that the desire has to come from within. I tried Chantix once it made me lightheaded and never tried again, I tried the patch and wellbutrin, e-cigarettes and hypnosis. Just need some sort of encouragement and someone to listen. I don't want to be another statistic but you are all so strong! :-(
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https://www.quora.com/How-can-I-quit-smoking-if-ci...
https://www.quora.com/Can-you-motivate-me-to-stop-...
Read two of my recent answers on quora about motivation to quit which come from my book, "How to win at quitting smoking". If it resonates with you, I will send anyone on this list a free PDF copy, just send me a PM with an email address.
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VJ - thanks for posting. You are so generous to continue to offer information to our BC group.
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Hi Ladies , I did not mean to scare anyone . I have started work at the nursing home , it requires me to work every weekend for 90 days as a probation period .. as well as reg days . I work 3-11 pm.. like tonight i start a 5 day work week . afyer 90 days I will Have health insurance and be in the union.. The union pays for school so I will go back and get my LPN ..Also the nursing home I work at is building a new wing that will be a hemodialysis unit .. and i will have my foot in the door so hopefully I can work in there since I did go to school for that last year . My granddaughter Brianna graduated Kindergarten on Wednesday ... Oh I work in South Hampton and if anyone has heard of the Hamptons and Long Island that is where all the famous people come for the summer ..
I was trying to catch up on all the reading .. Bosom , I am sorry you are having a time with court and lawyers .. I am glad we were in your dream .. and my hair has so much grey that I dye it all the time .. lol and working back in the nursing home I am feeling my age .. I come home with aches everywhere ..lol but I just love the people ... I am glad you like your hair .. me I am trying to grow it out so its in a crazy stage that does nothing ... I miss you
VJ I am going to look into that retreat . I have been trying to go on one with a group called sisters in scars but have not been able to afford the trips 2 years in a row now . I even did a thing like a go fund me but no one donated ..lol .. I guess God thought it was not the right time to go .. and he probably was right ..
Minus thank you so much for thinking of me .. xoxoxo
Judi and April good to see u , I hope the baptism is wonderful Judi ...
OneDove ... I can honestly say that once you quit somking . its hard and frustrating . I held on to that nasty morning smoke forever .. ask the ladies here .. I kept telling them I couldnt let go and i was so hard and angry at myself .. then one day I just gave it up .. and yes in late sept ember I will be smoke free for 2 years and I never imagined It would happen .. I thought I would never quit .. I am beyond proud of myself .. and you will be too .. I have so many streeses and so many things hapopend in the past 2 years and I have not smoked .. to me that shows that I can do it .. and you can too .. keep your head High .... glad you are here ..
Well I guess I talked my head off .. glad to be back love you all
xoxoxoxoxo
Lisamarie
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Oh hooray LisaMarie. A new job, a new plan and STILL not smoking. You go girl. Thanks for the long newsy post.
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Welcome OneDove ... please join the group more often for chats. Great ladies on this thread. LisaMarie ... congrats on all levels. You are one strong lady. Bosum, I agree .... it is your turn now. Head high, chest out .... march on!
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OneDove - oh my goodness. I thought I had answered & welcomed you. So sorry. Belated welcome.
I used Chantix and was really pleased. However you have to have made up your mind or nothing will work. Most of us quit several times before "it took" - or before we were truly ready. I quit smoking in my house first. Two week later I quit smoking in my car. Oh My, that only left the front porch. Two weeks after that I started the Chantix program. I never ramped up to the double doses & didn't refill the RX . I just kept taking it at the beginner's level - so it lasted awhile. Anytime I wanted a smoke that was out of the "rules", I took off around the block on a walk. At night I popped sunflower seeds - hand to mouth, seed in, hand down, crack, hand to mouth, seed out, hand down, repeat. I also ate a lot of damn carrots. They aren't prominent in my diet anymore.
I didn't quit because of cancer. I quit because I had serious osteopenia. My worst nightmare is to end up in a nursing home with a broken hip. Smoking is a major contributor to osteoporosis. As are cokes, which I quit at the same time. I was drinking 8+ cans a day & quitting cola was as bad as the smoking - but both together - eeek.
I've read several things lately that some of the side effects of Chantix may have been exaggerated. Personally I was crazy enough while trying to quit smoking JUST WANTING A CIGARETTE, so if Chantix gave me a few strange dreams, I ascribed it to my nicotine addiction.
As an aside that is not so funny, I built my bones back up to normal after I quit smoking by regular exercising. But then 6 years later chemo knocked me into full osteoporosis anyway.
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Welcome OneDove. This is a no judgment thread and it took many of us multiple times to quit and some of us are still struggling. I am at 3 years and 2 months and each day I just keep the faith I will make it through without smoking. This thread helped me a lot and knows better than most how hard this is, especially at a stressful time like going through breast cancer treatment! Best to you.
YAY Lisamarie! So happy you checked in with us and that things are looking up for you. You deserve it. I just know that things will continue to get better for you. It is time for good thing!
Now, it is your turn for some good things to start happening Bosum! You are overdue my dear. Keep the faith!
Nothing much new with me these days. Busy at work as usual and looking forward to having the week of July 4th off of work. Can't wait even if we are staying home and just puttering around here.
Hi Minus, Judi and VJ!
Hugs to all!
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Mine too Bosum. This is tragic. You cannot help but internalize these things. Hugs!
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Hi Ladies , Yes what crazy stuff in this world just what is going on.. what will come of our young ones . I lived in Florida for 10 years . I lived in Winter Park , so a lot of my friends live in Orlando and surrounding areas . It was so sad to see .. then on facebook all my friends one by one checking in safe .. what a relief ..
April congrats on 3 years ...
Bosom ... Chantix really was a life saver for me .. you can smoke that furst week and I felt it really took the urges away ..I think of you often and send u hugs and much love .. your time has come .. your time is now .. I have faith in you ...
Hope everyone is doig good .. Minus , Judi , onedove , VJ
xoxoxo'Lisamarie
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Bosum - so glad you made a lawyer decision. It's time for things to go right for you now!!!
I agree about the news. I don't watch the news anymore. It doesn't take 24/7 at top volume to tell a story. And I don't think the news needs to be presented like "reality" TV. I read the newspaper. And I read the news on line - again I control the amount I see. That doesn't mean I don't care, because I think you all know that I do. I just refuse to let it take over my every breath.
P.S. Sorry if I seem short. I've been without A/C since Monday noon. Outside temp yesterday was 97. Inside temp was 87. Humidity was 97 also. I just finally got air again. So now I can go get my glass fixed that I stepped while I was trying to keep the lights off to ward off any tiny bit of heat. Grrr.
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Bosom , Hope everything starts to work out for you .. I have no words aout the Florida ordeal with the gator . and disney .Minus im glad that you got AC and are back to being cool . those temps sounded brutal ..
me im just working like crazy thank god .. had a evening off last night and went with my daughter to my granddaughters dance recital reharsal ... well just sipping a cup of coffee thinking about my day .. Hope all is well
xoxoxoxox
Lisamarie
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Hey yall! I am slowly finding my way around this site & was happy to stumble across this post...I am 36, diagnosed with IDC May 10, had a bilateral mastectomy June 1, & begin Chemo sometime between now & July 1. I have been smoking for years & tried to quite before surgwry...I cut way back on smoking & then had surgery & came home & didn't smoke at all for the first week. We have never smoked in our home but both my husband & I smoke. It was very hard to walk outside & see his cigarettes or smell it & not pick it up....after a week I caved. I felt like a crack head searching for cigarettes when he would hide them from me. I know he meant well but geesh! Anyways..i am back to wanting to give it up, I know I need to as it isn't healthy & I have read alot about it not allowing Chemo to work fully. Any advice from anyone here on quitting cold turkey? I would rather not use any medications or anything as I am already feeding my body full of so many things recently with all the medications from surgery & chemo coming71222q up. Also when I quit before I never really seemed to have cravings, it was more a habit. I smoke after I eat, I smoke when I wake up, I smoke with my morning coffee, I smoke when I drive, I smoke when I take my dogs out to potty...just habit. Any advice would be helpful!
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Welcome SthrnYankee! I used the patch, an ecig, gum and counseling as well as VJ's very helpful information to help me quit a pack a day 40+ year habit so am not sure how to do this cold turkey but one of my best friends just did exactly that. She avoided the things that trigger her wanting a smoke like coffee (switched to morning hot tea) driving in her car (she stayed home the first few weeks which is easy for her as she is a writer and works from home) and not sitting on her deck at the end of a long day with a glass of wine (she gave up alcohol because it was a huge trigger for her) but that is all I got for you.
She just did things "differently" for a month or so. She is not 7 weeks out and feeling good about her success. She is also saying "I am a smoker who is not currently smoking" so she doesn't jinx herself. We all kind of say this to be honest because we are all just a puff or two away from relapse despite some of us having a few years under our belt.
Welcome and best to you!
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From my book, "How to Win at Quitting Smoking". If this resonates with you, I'll send a free PDF copy of anyone on this list, just send me a PM with your email address.
Smoking as a Habit. Habits are a "conditioned response" or pattern, in the form of a trigger – then a response. The most famous example of this is from the scientist, Pavlov, who conditioned dogs to salivate when they heard a bell ring. The trigger was a bell, and their response was to salivate. Nicotine trains the autonomic nervous system in your brain to react in the same involuntary and unconscious manner. It is the reward center of your brain where an automatic behavior, like smoking, becomes connected to the pleasurable effects from the release of dopamine.
When a trigger is present you reach for a cigarette with no thought or feeling attached. With enough repetition almost anything can become a trigger for a craving. Trigger − activities, places, situations, people, feelings or times; your response is always the same – you light up. Just as Pavlov's dogs expected to get food when they heard a bell ring, your brain expects to get nicotine whenever you are around one of your triggers.
The key to success is to become aware of each cigarette you smoke instead of acting out of an unconscious habit.
Habit cigarettes:
"I smoke when I'm watching TV, reading, or when I'm on the computer playing games, checking e-mail or on Facebook."
"I always smoke in certain situations such as answering the phone, driving, with coffee/tea/soda/alcoholic drink or after a meal."
"I smoke automatically without even being aware of it. I have found a cigarette in my mouth and didn't remember putting it there or I have lit up and then found one already burning in the ashtray."
"There are specific times during the day when I regularly smoke, such as with my morning coffee or driving."
"Right after lighting a cigarette, I put it out because I realize I don't really want it."
Alternatives:
Replace old habits with new ones. Instead of having a cigarette, go for a walk.
Ask yourself, "Do I really want this cigarette or I am reaching for it out of habit?"
Make smoking a conscious choice. Start a Tobacco Use Record described on page 32.
After meals: Go for a walk, brush your teeth, have a mint, wash the dishes by hand. Delay smoking after a meal by five minutes. Increase the length of the time-delay by five minutes each day.
Driving in the car: Do something that mimics the hand-to-mouth motion of smoking. Eat unsalted, unshelled sunflower seeds or raisins, one at a time. Have a water bottle that you sip frequently. Use a cinnamon stick to hold in your hand and chew on.
Answering the telephone: Only talk on the phone in a non-smoking room, such as the bedroom. Grab a pen and pad of paper to doodle while talking. Don't take your phone outside with you when you smoke. Make your phone calls short or don't answer it.
Drinking coffee/tea/soda: Sit in a different chair when having your morning coffee. Change brands or flavors. Switch from coffee to tea. Switch to water or iced tea instead of a soda.
You know your common everyday habits. What are some that are not ordinary? Think about different people, objects, places, times, emotions, events or situations where you always smoke that may only happen once in awhile. What ideas do you have to counter those circumstances?
It may feel like your "habit" cigarettes are the hardest to break and you find it almost impossible to not smoke with some activities because these patterns feel so comfortable; actually they are the easiest because you get to practice every day.
It takes about three to four weeks, or about 30 consecutive actions to "break" a habit; or as Pavlov would say, "the conditioning is extinguished". For example, if you smoke when drinking coffee, you will need to drink coffee without smoking about 30 times over three to four weeks before you will feel comfortable drinking coffee without a cigarette. Think of how many times you have smoked while having a cup of coffee over the years and realize you now need to repeat a new and different behavior many times to break that association. Have you (or someone you know) ever purchased a new car and not smoked in it? Before long you don't miss smoking in your car at all. In Step Two, you will learn how to break your habit cigarettes before you quit (see page 63).
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Southern Yankee - welcome. April & VJ have given you some good thoughts. I had to change my habit patterns for several months after I quit. And I did use Chantix when I finally succeeded in quitting (the 4th or 5th time I'd tried) The key is always - I am a smoker who is not smoking. It's so easy to relapse. It will be hard with your husband still smoking, but you can do it if you're determined. Please feel free to pop in here anytime to rant or rave or blow your own horn. Even small victories are worth celebrating.
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april485, vjsl8, minus two,
Thank you all so much! It is difficult with my husband still smoking! He said he would quit with me but that didn't happen! I was doing so good & was upset after relapsing bit now I'm just puffing away again like it never happened! Grrrr it's so hard! & like my plastic surgeon said..."your an adult & you know you need to stop, but this is also probably not a good time to tell you to stop & I won't turn you away because you smoke, just remember we are all adults here." I am so thankful to have a Dr that understands! It is hard, my husband got patches but told me he doesn't want them now...so I could try them I guess. It is very hard.
VJSL8- I would love to check out the book! Ariesash21@aol.com is my email. Thank you!
I will be back often to chat with yall! Thank you so much for being helpful & talking to me! I have tried a few other posts on here & haven't felt nearly as welcomed.
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Southern - we're with you. There are a number of people who have quit who post her. Also a number who are still trying or working up to trying again. Your PS sounds like an intelligent person. Hooray.
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SthrnYankee, my husband still smoked when I quit as well (we also did not smoke in the house) so it was harder for sure. But, the upside of this is he ended up quitting too. It took him 7 more months after I quit but one day, he slapped the patch on his arm and declared himself ready. And he did it! It was easier for him than it was for me because he had quit many times for years at a time but I was pretty steadily (quit here and there over time but not for long periods, only once made a year) a smoker for 43 years! But, we did it and now, we just take it One Day At A Time! It is all we can do. This drug (cigs) is evil!
We are here, whether you succeed or not. We understand. We will always support you as long as it takes. Hugs!
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Yankee, I too quit using chantix after many attempts .. for my actual bi lateral mastectomy and recon , I quit after one week on the patch , I think because I was so scared that I could not get my recon , but after I was healed I was at it again . I know smoking is a habit but I do also believe it is an addiction as well. the body gets used to the nicotine and needs it . anyhow addiction or habit , I thought I would never stop. But I am almost 2 years quit as well as almost 2 years without alcohol . but like April says at anytime one can relapse .. I am also a smoker who chooses not to smoke .. I also lived with someone who smoked and it was hard , I held resentments when i seen the smokes on the table outside or he smoked in the bathroom.. but Ilearned to let it go .. These ladies are by far the most amazing ladies and there is so much support and love on this thread .. they helped me a lot throughout the years .. smoking not smoking and numerous other things .. Glad you are here .. Best of luck on your journey ...
Hugs
Lisamarie
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Started PT today for my arm that was broken & shoulder that was immobilized. It's not fun but I need to be my range of motion back. Lots of darn medical stuff in the next few weeks. I'm ready to dump all docs & get on with my life. Sorry for whining. Thinking about all of you - smoking or not.
Southern Yankee - how's it going?
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I feel your pain Minus! I think you have a right to whine! I am sick of doctors myself. I need total knee replacement and I have been putting it off as long as possible so I can only have it done once since they do wear out but now I am in such bad pain that I am considering the surgery soon. The thing is, there is no one else in my office that does my particular job anymore since they promoted my colleague to manager and she is no longer taking new people on her case load so it would be really bad for the office if I leave for 6-8 weeks which is how long my surgeon said I would need to be out of work. ugh...I hate aging and the subsequent doctors we have to deal with and that is not even including the BC!
Hugs to you sweetie. You will get through it.
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April - thanks for the cheers. So after my whine, last night my glasses broke. But I had to go to the periodontist first this morning so I could get my teeth 'scraped' before my upcoming Prolia shot. Messy tape job on the glasses, but I could drive.
I've had friends who have had knees done. They are so pleased afterwards they don't know why the waited. But I do understand the job coverage. Doesn't sound like something a temp could cover. Still, sometimes you just have to put yourself first. (something I'm not good at either)
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Minus and April, I am sorry for the pain and the medical procedures ... I hope you get your range back minus .. and a new pair of glasses..April , I also have heard good stuff about teh knee replacement .. get your self fixed and out of pain...
On a funny note ..My medical doctor said I want you to go for a mammograsm .. I said why , I had the bilateral mastectomy .. she said but yes you still need mammogram .. I said i don't think so .. to humor her I went and when i got there they told me you dont need a mammo , possibly a sono .. let us call your doctor we need a script ..lol so after 2 hours of waiting the verdict was not a mammo either its a MRI with contrast every 3 years lol.. so next week I have MRI ... It was aggrivating at the time but now it seems funny ... and my doctor called me and apologized about not knowing that I did not need mammo ..
Im still working many hours tryong to get the money raised to fix my truck ... Love and miss you all
JUDI , BOSOM , and rhe NEW girls SMOKING or NOT ... where are you .. this thread is quiet .
xoxoxoxoxo
Lisam arie
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LisaMarie - thanks for the mammo story. My chuckle for the day. Every time I've tried to schedule an ultrasound or an MRI, the department says I must have a mammo first. Not happening. I always have to go to the head of the dept & stomp my feet. Anyway, good luck with the MRI. I don't normally take drugs but I did take 1/2 a Xanax when I had MRIs. Count down to truck fix time!!!
Bosum - sorry your week was the pits. Don't worry about being chatty. It's just nice that you checked in.
Just got home from a memorial service for a friend's husband. He died w/COPD and never quit smoking even though each puff brought him closer to the end. I met his wife because she was a friend of my BFF who died in 2005. They were all nurses & had a "smoker's group" that met for dinner every month. I was invited regularly even though I was never in the medical field. Such a great bunch of ladies. They even took trips together. Not many left of the original 12-15. Several died of cancer, but none of lung cancer. The three that I know fairly well are still smoking. Since I'm 9 year out next month, I just stand with them and enjoy the smoke vicariously.
Did you catch that...NINE YEARS ago I quit smoking on July 11th. OMG, how can that be? Seems like yesterday. Except I don't twist my self in knots anymore when I think about a cigarette, Yes, I still miss it. Yes I am still a smoker who is just not smoking. Yes I know I can't even take one puff or I could relapse. Hang in there everyone.
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Minus, I am so Happy for you ... 9 Years .. I too hope to have that someday .. for now im happy that 2 years is around the corner .. although i spmetimes feel like ive not smoked in forever ..lol congrats woo hoo ... sorry about the loss .. funerals are always sad .. unfourtunatly that is how my mom will pass as did all of my other family members so far .. smoking up till the day ... sad
i miss my mom .. she has not been the same in a long time .. and calling her is crazy as she never answers or calls back .. finally i got her the other day and she said she dont feel much like talking to anyone and she feels like she is at the end .. my heart breaks ...On another funny note ... laugh or smile for the day ! reason I do what I do .. I went to asnswer a call bell last night , a little old man just was feeling lonley and wanted to talk , he talked about his widfe coming to visit and how happy he was . I just listend and smiled .. then he said oh my you are so beautiful , especially when you smile .. if I could I would get on one knee with a box and well you know .. and we both chuckled and he said thank you for talking to me ... and i blew hom a kiss as I left and he just smiled ... rthe whole reason right there why i love my work ...
Have an amazing Sunday everyone ... sorry for my messy typing .. i guess i rush and cant spell right lol
love and hugs
Lisamarie
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LisaMarie - how wonderful that your job has such human benefits. And it is so neat that you take the time to really "see" your patients. I'm sorry about your mum. If I remember correctly, your last visit was problematic due to the guy she's living with. It's sad that your contact is so limited.
Hope everyone has a good Sunday.
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