Exchange City
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Thanks Shoregirl! Not patient at all by nature, believe me, but cancer has taught me some patience if nothing else.
Girls, please say some prayers for me.
My landlord told me he is selling the house and I need to go as soon as he finds a buyer. There could not be any worse timing than this. December is surgery month, and my contract is till the end of the year. If he finds someone till then, I'll just have a month to pack and go.
I've been searching for a new apartment like crazy, but everything I find so far, is way out of our budget. With me unemployed for more than a year now, things are getting tougher and tougher everyday. Hubs is supporting everything as best as he can, but any money we had on the side, just flown out of the window during this year with all the surgeries and tests and hospitalization time and drugs and so on.
I'm already having anxiety attacks and depression is roaring at me, although I pretend I don't listen to it.
I just don't know what we'll do. His family won't help (long story), my folks just can't or if some of them can, are not willing to.
Half my friend are unemployed due to economical crisis here, and those who are not, just don't really get how it's possible to be almost broke in a year's time. Lucky for them, they didn't have to face cancer, and I hope they never will, but they just don't get it.
I have nowhere to turn for help, or borrow some money from. It's a rather small amount, 1.500-2000 euro, but even that, I just don't have them right now. Our savings will just cover the new surgery and all.
We also have our fur babies to think of.
Surely, they have been some "friends", who have suggested to "just get rid of the animals", as a solution. Hell, yeah. Like the animals are the reason we've been left with no money at all. Not financial crisis, not the rising unemployment, not cancer. The pets are to blame. I explain calmly (when I can), that my pets are family, and they 've been with us all their lives, since they were babies and we' ve adopted them when things were better, and we were great financially. How could I abandon them now? Who would want to adopt a 15 year old cat, for God's shake?
I ask them "Would you say the same, if they were kids instead of pets?" and they get really annoyed. Well, I get MORE annoyed than them.
Well... I better go for a nap. Lately I feel like I have no stamina at all.
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Saying prayers for you Dafne. This is a tough situation you are in to be sure. But all things are possible with God.
Hugs & Prayers!!
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Dafne, Your frustration is understandable! I know you want your surgery as soon as possible, but would it at all make sense in your situation to postpone it until after the beginning of the year until your living situation is settled? Some women keep their TEs for a looong time prior to surgery for various reasons. Maybe you should allow yourself more time and not feel rushed - unless insurance is a factor. There's so much to consider, I know. Will say some prayers for you! ~ Kim
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Dafne I am so sorry..I will keep you in my prayers & please try to keep your chin up..I know it is very hard to do but we are all here for you! Hugs!
For those of you who had your exchanges ..I am 3 1/2 weeks out and am worried I maybe doing too much. I feel like the implants are moving a lot and almost feel like I am swollen & have alot of tightness. Especially on my left side and close to under my armpit. I went on vacation and played in the snow with my son and went “tobogganing" down a hill and had a blast but now worried because I feel alotof movement in my chest.
Any of you go through this? Also wondering when I will feel “normal" again whereI don't notice these implants all the time. I know....months prob. But I am ready now lol. Its so hard to be patient.
Hugs to you all & hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving with your families! My hair was the topic with my family and how kinky & curly its growing out. It is all wild & I have no clue what to do with it ha! Just happy its growing!!
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Dafne, I am so sorry. I am with you 100% on your fur babies. They are your family. I wonder if it makes sense to consider what Redemptive Sufferer suggested, that is, postponing your surgery until next year. I am sure the thought of keeping the TEs longer may be a drag, but if they aren't causing you too much trouble, it would give you time to sort other things out. Big hugs to you.
Lynae, I think you and I need to slow down! I went outside and did some light raking of leaves yesterday--I mean, not much at all, just a pretty small section of our backyard and there weren't that many leaves, but last night and today I'm paying for it--it hurts. I took some Ibuprofen last night and probably will again. I haven't noticed any shifting though. Would it help to talk to your PS?
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Lynae & Minute...you are doing too much! One of the mantras is "Just because you can, doesn't mean you should." I know its hard to be low key. I went out and planted 5 rosebushes 2 weeks post exchange. I regretted it as my whole body was wracked in pain. Even though everyone says the exchange is a piece of cake compared to the BMX, it is still major surgery even though it is outpatient. So much of our energy goes into healing the incisions and flushing out the anesthesia, rebuilding blood and tissue. We really need to take it easy the first 6 weeks.
Lynae, if you feel something isn't right get in to see your ps. I can tell you I am now 7 months post exchange and am at the point where I don't notice the implants all the time, but they are on my mind as I go in for my revision Wednesday. The heaviness and tightness for me disappeared at between 5 and 6 months post op. As for the new curly hair, my hair changed when I hit 50. It was straight (slight body wave) all my life. If you Google "The Curly Girl Method" you will find all kinds of tips on dealing with curly or wavy hair. Also a forum I love called TheLonghaircommunity.com has all kinds of great info on hair care including lots of info on plant based chemical free hair color, and Naturallycurly.com is geared toward curly wavy hair. Hope this helps!
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I am going to sound like your mother, but knock it off!! These are precious babies on your chest. You need to treat them with love and care. And follow that mantra. You have carefully designed pockets that contain stitches and well planned placement. If you treat them right they will become a part of you soon. I am going on 3 years and hardly notice them. But, they will always feel different, the “new normal “.
So hang in there. And think before you act. 😘
Robin
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I know. It seemed like nothing when I was doing it. I see my PS on Tuesday and am afraid to tell him.
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Shoregirl thanks for all the great info on the curly hair. I will check it out. You are so right “just because we can doesn’t mean we should”. I just need to be patient.
Minute it does sound like you & I need to slow down...it is just so hard. I love this time of year and its a busy time with shopping, decorating & visiting family but I will do my best to take it easy more and let my hubby do more. I Christmas shopped too much over the weekend and definitely paid for it
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Great advice everyone! It is so easy to overdue it. I don't feel like I have overexerted my muscles, but I definitely have been caught up in the holiday spirit and tackling too many tasks. I've had a couple afternoons recently where I crashed.
Lynae, we had our TE the same week. I haven't noticed any movement in my implants. I'd agree with others here who suggest calling your PS.
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Wanted to ask all of you a question since I won't be seeing my PS for awhile. I am starting rads tomorrow and so no more expander fills. I had BMX (cancer on left). I don't think they look big enough and the cancer side sits up higher than the other side. Will they be able to continue to expand after rads are over? I know I have to wait a long time for the exchange surgery but I won't be happy if this is the final size. Thanks.
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TaRenee,
I am also a teacher.(high school) I had my exchange on a Wednesday, took the following week off and went back to work on Monday. I was off 10 days (beginning of March) and I had small drains as my PS explained to me. NOTHING like the awful things I had for BMX. I think he removed them the following Tuesday. My doc said I wouldn’t need more than 2 weeks. I hadn’t the FMLA time reserves just in case but didn’t need it. Listen to you’re body.
By waiting a bit after you are filled you allow your muscle to relax (if it is under) and your skin needs a break. If you have questions please feel free to PM me.
Michelle
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Imkopy2
Thanks! This is my first year in middle school and I’ve taken off so much time already. I just don’t want to overdo it. I also don’t want to miss out on my beach trip again because of surgery. (I’m a beach baby at heart and didn’t get to go at all last summer due to all this surgery and recovery and more surgery). But maybe waiting till June is the smartest thing for me to do. I do have spring break and can look at dates for exchange then. I guess I need to talk to my PS and see what he says. I may have some questions as I get closer. Thank you for the pm offer. I’m sure I’ll take you up on it soon
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Hi T-Sue, thank you for that info. I did call my PS and will go see him Thursday morning. I feel like my left implant has pushed over under my arm and is sticking out a bit...it is very hard and feels strange on that side. I have a lot of movement. My right side seems fine. I am hoping it is nothing or a simple fix. I have no idea how they would fix that if it has in fact moved....guess I will soon find out!
Take it easy ladies...hugs to you all
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TaRenee
I think you can be the best judge of timing...I had my MX in the summer and had planned on exchange over winter recess, but my TE started to leak so exchange was pushed up to the Friday after Labor Day! So school had just started for the year...well, I was back in the classroom on Tuesday. It worked out, I did nothing but teach a class and then rest. If your MX recovery was smooth, then I think having spring break would be fine...and then you will be healed by summer and can enjoy summer! TT
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Ladies,
I was away and visiting family over the Thanksgiving holiday. I also started work today! Finally!
Dafne, I prayed for you and hope that your situation improves on all fronts.
Lynae, I am glad that you've scheduled that appointment. Your PS will know what to do. I am sure that this is something that he or she has seen before. There will be a solution.
I had an appointment with my PS on Monday. Things were looking fine. We are just going to see how things settle by my next appointment in March. Right now, my implant still needs to fall a bit more, but my pecs were pretty tight, so it might take a bit longer. My PS thinks that if I need a revision it will be minor, so that is good. I am not in for anything major!
Good news: My PS released me from the tyranny of 24/7 spanx and compression bra (about 2 weeks early)!! He said that my thighs had settled nicely and evenly from the fat grafting, so I don't need to do the spanx thing anymore! I guess the compression bra wasn't necessary anymore, based on what he saw and felt. Honestly, I didn't ask any questions...I was ready to be free!! I had to buy a couple of new bras, right after I left his office. I had planned on returning to work with the compression bra and that thing only fit a few shirts well. Now I have regular bras and can wear whatever tops I want to wear!
Minute, how did your PS appointment go?
Amy, I didn't do rads, so I cannot help with your question.
Hope everyone else is well!
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Scrafgal welcome back! Glad you enjoyed your holiday & You’re back at work. I too am back full time in the office. It is a good feeling!
So happy to hear your PS appt went well
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OCDAmy you may get a little more expansion after radiation. It depends also on how long you are willing to wait until exchange. I did a little more after my radiation, but then they want that to heal for six months after that final expansion. My current implant size is quite a bit smaller than my pre-cancer size. But as implants they look better than the expanders did (the expanders are so square) and so much perkier than my breasts that the size doesn't bother me- I wanted to be a cup-size smaller, but probably really ended up a little smaller than that. I was ok with it ultimately. But I know that they try to balance expanding you quickly with getting you started on radiation asap with skin integrity. I know my PS and my RO had a tug of war on when I needed to stop expansion and start radiation. I had to have one side un-expanded for radiation, then re-expanded, so they went a little bigger during that process (and then did the other side a little bigger as well.)
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Meg, thanks for the reply. I was a C before and wanted to stay a C. I feel like I'm a B now and I don't like it. Hoping the PS can expand me a little more after rads.
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It's a lovely day for a revision! I hope all you dear ladies are doing well! I will check back in when able.
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Shoregirl, thinking of you and sending prayers for a smooth surgery, an easy recovery and a great outcome.
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Have my 12 week post exchange follow up on Friday...so happy to have it as I can also say bye-bye to my current PS. I think I have healed well, I definitely will need a revision at some point, but will definitely also seek another provider. I am past the fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me...can't afford a fool me the third time!
Sending prayers your way Shoregirl. TT
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Tarenee, I also work at a school as the Office manager. I had my ex on spring break so that worked out nicely. I had lots of help doing reaching and pulling tasks. I never overdid any activity. Take care and follow your PS instructions to a T.
Robin
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Hi ladies!
I saw my PS today and I think we are leaning toward a spring exchange. I want to be able to enjoy the summer this year so taking easy on spring break may be my answer. I have to call with my date requests tomorrow and we will see when I can get scheduled.
PS said that TE looks great. We talked about how “lopsided” they look now as opposed to how they will look when he finishes. Honestly, they aren’t lopsided. The TEs are set a little differently and thus look different. He assured me that it will be good. And I’m released from seeing him weekly until we get the exchange scheduled. I’ll go in a month before and we will talk form and shape and implant types. I’m kind of excited. Now, if I can just get released from PT I can stop spending so much on gas to drive an hour each way to doctor appointments once or twice a week!
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TaRenee, I get it I am also a summer baby love it and the one thing I did last summer was I REFUSED to let BC ruin another summer. No surgeries, no revisions nothing but me enjoying life. I felt like I deserved to live it up. Because of my diagnosis I had to have an oophorectomy (ER+) since I also had fibroids I asked to have the full deal. My docs were totally on board and agreed that I should enjoy life without restrictions. I had my surgery in Sepetember after the school year started...and you know what I had a great summer and my students survived. Regardless of what district you work in I want you to keep this in mind. At that start if every school year you have 12 weeks of FMLA time. (Fiscal year starts July 1) What this means is administration cannot mess with you about absences especially in regards to your evaluation or your job it’s a law you’re protected under. As far as getting paid that is dependent on the amount of absences you have accrued. Some unions have sick bank for teachers who need the additional days and are out of them
Not sure of your situation but my advice to you is this, you most certainly deserve to enjoy life without restrictions so kick off the flip flops, put your feet in the sand, splash in the water and have a ball. Don’t spend one minute of your summer laid up because of surgery due to BC. The exchange is easy for sure but it is still surgery and you won’t be allowed to go in the water, and possibly may have to stay out of the sun. So be sure to ask your PS.
Hugs to you in whatever you decide
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Hello ladies! I survived lol. I was not nervous at all for this revision, even though it was pretty extensivie. I remember being a nervous wreck for the 1st exchange of the TEs to implants. Had to pop a Valium before getting to the hospital. But no Valium today. I was laughing and joking and thoroughly enjoying the comraderie I had with my team until they put me under. My new ps is female, only abuot 31 years old and so awesome!! She did downsize me (Yay!!!) from 470 to 440cc, switched from Inspira SCX 470 (extra full projection) to Sientra smooth round High Projection (not extra high) I felt the inspiras were too projected, too narrow, too firm and heavy. They had already started sagging!! They almost looked like 2 oranges sitting on my chest. The new ones are wider, like my old real breasts and just a bit less projected but not like hamburger buns. She did just a litte fg, all over the implant and the upper edge. This gave me such a more beautiful look, nice and soft. A gradual slope instead of jutting out from my chest abruptly, looking like a Barbie dol. They are not so firm like the Inspiras, I am sure the fg helped that. They are wider than my originals Inspiras. I think the projection is just 5cm less, but so much more natural looking without that drastic step off I had w/Inspiras. When she sat me up in the OR to get opinions from those in the room they loved the 440s. Two of the ladies said they wanted them on themselves! I think I am really going to love them, once I have the unveiling.
I only have minor pain, kind of feels like sunburn where fat was harvested as well as where it was placed. Also feels like the soreness your muscles get when you have worked out too hard. I beleive the milder pain is due to the special 3 day numbing medicine she injected into the surgical site called Exparal. I highly recommend it to those with upcoming surgeries. It really makes the pain much more tolerble, and I am taking way less pain meds that I did with the 1st 2 surgeries that did not have the Exparal. The right side is a bit more sore than the left because when my ps opened me up, she found alloderm well incorporated and a good amt of it over the Left implant. But the R side had a tiny piece of alloderm, almost none at all. She was very surprised at that. So she added a full covering over the front of new implants and wrapped it underneath the implant at the IMF. She also pointed out to me that the Right IMF was 2 cms higher than the left, so she fixed that too.
I do have 2 drains, but completely waterproof dressings so I can shower whenever I want. (Yay again!!!) Right drain producing more than twice the amt as the left, but she thinks it is because she did more work on that side with adding the alloderm. The hospital is great, much better than the one where I had BMX and exchange. My new ps ordered not only the anti nause patch, but also had me pick up 1 dose of Emend (simlar to Zofan) to take on the way to the hospital. Also wrote a prescription for Zofran to combat nausea at home if I need it. I was a little nauseous when I came to, but they hooked my up with Phenergan in the IV. Oh, also she said I don't have to sleep on my back, side is ok too! I think I will sleep on my back propped way up with pillows though, at least as long as I can stand it. I really don't want these girls to start sagging!! The dear ps called me around 8PM to see how I was doing. They had made an appt with me to see ps tomorrow morning but when we spoke on the phone she said if there is no sign of infection or any other problem, I can just do a phone consult with her tomorrow as we live just over an hour from her office. I thought that was very nice of her. As far as future fg, I will definetly do it if needed. She said I could do it in 6 weeks if I am in a hurry, but 3 months would be best so all the swelling has gone down. I will assess in 3 months, I am in no rush. As an added bonus to getting another round of fg I can get my love handles/muffin top reduced
I am going to hit the sack, its been a very long day!! I apologize this post was so long, I am just really excited and happy with my surgeon.I will be writing a glowing review for her.Take care all you brave warriors!!
Blessings, Shoregirl (Heather)
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Shoregirl,
Thanks for the update, it sounds like you are doing amazing. It also sounds like you hit the PS lottery. She sounds like a wonderful, communicative doctor. Even though I had a great PS (very kind, great bedside manner), I think having a female PS would have been even better. Glad to hear you are so pleased thus far, hope you continue to heal quickly.
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Shoregirl,
Thanks for the update, it sounds like you are doing amazing. It also sounds like you hit the PS lottery. She sounds like a wonderful, communicative doctor. Even though I had a great PS (very kind, great bedside manner), I think having a female PS would have been even better. Glad to hear you are so pleased thus far, hope you continue to heal quickly.
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Shoregirl,
I am glad things worked out so well!!! Thanks for the update!
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Glad you’re doing well, Shoregirl. I’d like to second what you said about Exparel. I had it with my BMX and my exchange, and I’m a fan. Anyone about to undergo any surgical part of this unwanted merry-go-round should ask their surgeon about it
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