Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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SoCalLisa -- people have orchids just growing outside?! What a tremendous variety of gorgeous flowers in your part of the planet- and excellent photography. Thanks for posting those.
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Hi Weesa....nice to meet you. Hopefully the chemo you took did work. What kind was it. The chemo generally takes care of anything that may be lingering after your initial surgery. The Femara...or whichever AI you take keeps hormones at bay....someone told me they fill up the cells so that should a cancer cell find it's way there....it cannot get in so just basically dies. I think I'm happy there is just something that works. There are unfortunately nowdays a wide range of ages for those getting BC. Anyone could come to this thread, but Northstar and many others felt that the "seasoned" ladies had some issues just a mite different than the younger ladies and so this site was given a forum.
Lisa as always a beautiful feast.....easy on the eyes and low cal too.
Definitely makes a trip to the supermarket much more palatable. We all just love those pictures.Isabella.....no one should be giving you static about how you feel. If there ever is a time when it should be all about you I believe trying to do BC and keep going to work everyday is the time. No one will ever know for sure how you feel but you.....they cannot have your reality, just as most of the time you don't and can't have theirs. I'd think they'd be looking for ways to support you rather than rail at you for a condition not of your choosing.
I don't think the effects of Arimidex and probably hundreds of other drugs would be gone in 3 days after you stop taking them. I had to wean myself off HRT.....otherwise you just go back into all the symptoms of menopause and I took them for not quite 6 years. Dr. let me quit after I had a stroke but slowly. Anything probably taken for a long time which deals with hormonal or glandular reactions probably takes time.
Lassie...what a pickle huh!!!! From brilliance to ahem in 24 hours hmmm. Something not qite fair in that huh !!!
Spar, Carole, Jo , Kathleen.....hope you are all hanging in there.
Jackie
Jo, I think we were posting same time and you got yours out their first. Nice to see someone told you roughly the same thing.....that you can't take something everyday for a long period of time and just stop w/o some sort of backlash.
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JO and Spar, I think your experiences have convinced me that when the time comes, and it's years away, I will wean off, with or without my onc's okay. It just seems the thing to do and I'm certain it can't hurt. If I take it for 5 years there should be no problem weaning off for at least a few weeks if not months.
Looking forward to hearing your results JO. Thanks for sharing.
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Hey, ladies, it is Weesa back again about my AI experience. And, I was asked about my chemo--I did dd ACT after mastectomy, rads then the AI's. There is a clinical trial going on, a double blind trial where half the survivors are given a placebo and half are given Femara for another five years beyond whatever they took for the first five years--Tamoxifen or AI. The trial is several years out--I know this because my onc asked me to join the trial several years ago. I declined because I didn't think I could commit to ten years, and I was right--I only lasted for 6.5 years. It is anticipated the difference between five years and ten is only going to be a percent or two. I have had a long rough road convincing people in my health care circle that I wasn't crazy, that I wasn't imagining my se's.Without saying so directly to me I could see they thought of me as a total nut case a few years ago, and I feel so vindicated now, reading about so many se's--there is such a striking similarity in our experiences. I still urge anybody needing to take an AI who is highly hormone receptive as I was--to go ahead. They really do work--and I am not excluding Tam here either which I could not take due to my port clotting up. The figures are impressive. But you will pay a price--it's no different than any other good thing in life. If you listen to your body you will learn what to do--I took glucoasmine chrondroitin, Mobic, turmeric, never sat for more than ten minutes without getting up and walking, swimming, hot tub, special massages, acupuncture, you name it, but it all helped me for a good long time.When my knees started popping out of joint when I drove my car and I had to hold them in place with my hands and manage to steer the car, and then my left knee tore so I felt it--I knew it was time to quit, and you will know also when that time is.I think what bothers so many of us is that sometimes it seems to be a conspiracy of silence with the oncs and the drug reps.I was told so often it was just a concidence that my body chose the time to start ripping apart as the same time as taking an AI. But trust your instincts, if you feel it is an se it probably is. You know your body better than anybody else. When I was a young woman I fell into the trap of taking birth control pills for a good many years, then when I got married and couldn't conceive I took Clomid, then when I was 50 or so a male gyn talked me into HRT against my better judgment.For the past years I was still screwing with my hormones--it was time to quit. Let's hear from some more really older but wiser women--I am 66. almost 67.
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Also,,I am curious to know if any of you had a mastectomy and a full course of radiation after the surgery. How did it go for you? Any Side Effects?
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Weesa, thanks for sharing.
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Weesa: I had chemo, then mx and just finished rads last Friday. I had 3 out of 6 nodes positive, with 1 being a pectoral node. Since that node was positive, my rad went above my clavicle bone. I had 28 treatments. They used a bolus on me in 2 different positions from day 1 and everyday. Last Monday was the last day they used it since my skin was so burnt. I have redness on my neck with one looking like a floor burn. Nothing seems to help. They gave me Aquaphor, Radia-Plex Gel and Rediacream. My sternum hurts as well as other parts. My scar and under my arm is a deep purple from the rads. It also itches. My techs kept telling me as bad as it looks, my skin held up very well. I sure would hate to see the others. It has to be absolutely horrible for them. They told me I should start feeling better in two weeks. Does it keep getting worse before it gets better? I see the rad doc tomorrow for a reg. follow-up. I haven't started my hormone pills yet. I see the onc. for a reg. checkup on the 17th.0
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Weesa...I had lumpectomy....actually two cancers Papilary and Ductal in the same breast, close to each other. Most of the Papillary came out in biopsy tube, but the much larger Ductal tumor was not found till I was in surgery. This one ( fast growing ) is the one that put me in the category of having 4 rounds A/C...once every three weeks followed by 4 rounds Taxotere once every three weeks.....then about 5 weeks later I started 7 full weeks of radiation. Lost every hair on my head and in time every one on my body including eyelashes as well. I lost 38 pounds during the 6 months of treatments and though I only worked two days a week, I was able to go some of the time, but did go out every day....even in two foot of snow to feed feral cats. Many times I was fearful of losing stomach contents during these forays but I made it. I'm sure a couple of times I should not have been out as I wasn't mentally up to par by a long shot.....but thankfully in my small town there was not much traffic. In the end I think it helped more than hindered me. I did not have one cold the entire time though I did get esophageal thrush after first Taxotere and have to spend overnight in the hospital.
None of this was easy, but I think of that Godly quote. I didn't say it would be easy....I said it would be worth it. Everything I did so far has been worth it. Sometimes I didn't know how I was going to get though the next five minutes let alone the next five treatments or whatever but the fact that I never, ever for one second actually walked alone got me here. Side effects....a few. A little heat now and then, but I can be oddly cool when others are warm....left over yet from chemo I think. Sometimes I still can't feel my feet or toes and it is much more noticeable after I've sat for a spell. My balance could be better and I have fallen a few times. Not too pleasant. When you get my age ( 64 ) you have quit bouncing much when you fall. It's more a big thud and splat and no more slow motion falls.....your down without realizing why and what really happened in a millisecond thanking Heaven and all that is there if your not in the grocery store or a crowd somewhere when it happens. Luckily I have been in my house or yard.....and what is the first thing I do....look over my shoulder to made sure no one saw me ---- even though I'm well aware I'm alone.
I guess the litmus test is this: I hope and pray this is my one and only experience with Bc....but I would do it all again. Knowing now exactly what it is all about, I'd hate almost every second of it and the after effects....but I learned how really strong I am and I learned that there are many wonderful people in this world who will support you sight un-seen. From the first moment almostt ...a bond comes that is just difficult to share with anyone who has not been here and done this. The love and support from another BC sister is immeasurable and brings such a sense of safety.
Hope you all have a wonderful Sunday eveing.
Hugs,
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IllinoisLady - you have a great attitude!0
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I can relate to the being alone when things happen. My husband died over 6 years ago. No pets except dust bunnies. The house I lived in was too big for just one person and the upkeep was not worth it for just me. I enjoyed the yard and patio, but that too was a lot of work for just me. Most of my friends dropped off since they were still "couples" and they did not want an extra person tagging along. Even my coffee friends dropped off since we had little in common once I became "single" - all be it not by choice.
Our only son lived a 5 hours drive away, so I decided to sell the house and move closer to him. He and I have always been close. And I was lucky to sell before the real estate market took a beating. Exactly 36 years to the date from when we moved into the house, I moved out. To a 2 bedroom apartment which I am still in. The freedom from maintenance and yard work is wonderful and a plus when I was going thru treatments. No leaves to be raked, no snow to shovel -- 2 BIG things for me.
I knew no one when I moved except my son and his girl friend and her parents. Now I have a group of chemo buddies and bridge and bingo friends and my treatments are done. Time for me to become a "social butterfly"..... just teasing. This area has tons of things that a "single" person can do but it is nice to have a companion once in a while.
My life is simpler, and I have fewer responsibilities without the house and yard. My son has been married for over a year and they are expecting their first child in the Spring. Life is good.
Hugs, Nancy
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Good morning ladies! Wow! What a chatty group you have been this weekend! :-)
I haven't been on much the last few days because I've been nursing a bad lower back. I guess I've been golfing too much and have irritated it. As a result, I can't sit too long, stand too long, or lay down for any extended period of time. That makes for an intersting day! LOL
I hope everyone is doing well today. I've enjoyed your comments on the Arimidex. I still have 3 more years of it.
Hugs to all of you!
Rita
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Nancy...you are the epitome of when life hands you lemons make lemonade. I hope we all can keep doing that. I'm glad you "knew" what to do to make your life as rich as possible after your husband passed on. All these things as well have you in an excellent position to now enjoy another generation.
Rita....wow, you have had it with the back. I didn't pick this up on the Illinois thread. Hope you do get it well under control. I think Rita and golfing are almost not two words are they?
Patoo....thank you....I inherited ( bless her loving heart ) my attitude in large part from my Mom. She did not know the meaning of stop, quit, give up, let go.or any thing like it up till the day she passed away . She really did know when it was time to give up and did so gracefully with no remorse or regrets.....but not a minute before she had too.
Hugs to all.
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Good morning ladies! Illinois - you do have a good attitude. I am working on that now - I love that Godly saying - I didn't say it would be easy, I said it would be worth. I can certainly relate to falling - you know I fell in the hospital (at least I was close to treatment), visiting my aunt and shattered my shoulder. That was one fall I didn't care who saw - I was in so miuch pain! Usually, however, I am falling because of bad weather conditions.
Nancy - I think you made the right decision to downsize. I love living in a house but the maintenance and upkeep are just too much.
Debbie - thanks for your card. I hope the "burns" go away quickly. I know what you mean about "I would hate to see the others."
Everyone - have a great day. I wish only great strides for each of you.
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I have seen way too many - some friends and some I just heard about - who are struggling with a house and upkeep and maintenance and taxes and all. It took me over a year to downsize, clean out, throw out, garage sales, and donating. I had the exact amount of stuff I needed when I moved and still room for more. There is nothing I regretted getting rid of or that I needed.
But I was fortunate enough to have all the time in the world to do it. I did not set any time table, just started one day up in the attic and worked my way down to the garage. My biggest thing was to hire the 14 year old son of a neighbor to lug stuff out of the attic and to the curb for trash day. He was too young to get a "job" and his parents and i worked up a "contract". He made some money, I saved my back with 2 slipped disks and cervical disk disease.
Happy days for all, Nancy
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Wow Nancy, you surely "did what you had to do". I am so glad it turned out as well as it did
How nice to have a teenage boy closeby who actually wanted to work for some money...and I am so happy he did the job for you ..that is a win-win situation..
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Hi to all. After 11 days of drains, I'm tubeless now! The nurse practitioner took out the two drains this morning. It didn't really hurt to have them removed. My incisions don't look as good as she would like, so I'm to keep an eye on them for signs of infection. She gave me permission to drive and to take walks, but cautioned that I shouldn't get wet with perspiration. Well, that pretty much eliminates walking outside in south Louisiana any time of the day or night.
Now I have to wait a month or more for my oncotype dx results, which will determine whether I have to take chemo or not. Or whether I will be advised to take it. I guess I can decide for myself.
From reading your posts, I'm getting some lessons in courage and endurance in this battle with bc.
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Yay for you Carole....getting those drains out. What a relief that will be for you. Now at least that wait will be a lot more pleasant. Wish it were not so long, but you still have some healing to do so nothing much could be done anyhow. I'm sure to a person we will all be praying for low numbers for you. Sending lots of healing energies your way.
Hugs, Jackie
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Hi all
Do hope all is going OK. Great the drains are out Carole.
Nancy I am impressed. Wish I could declutter, we have so much stuff. My DDs keep trying to help me get rid of things but it is something I need to do by myself. We plan to move in about 5 years all going to plan so would like to have things manageable by then.
Have been a little low the last few days, found a peasize lump about half way between scar and collarbone.Own doc not sure about it so will see the BS again next week, only saw her a month ago - it wasn't there then.
Have had a really busy day with meetings so must think about dinner.
Big hugs
Alyson
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JO: I am a big collector of hard bound books, too. I cherish them. I would have to donate to the library, nursing homes, etc. as you get next to noting for them at a yard sale. I come from a long line of collectors of things (or should I say a long line of hoarders).
The sister I live with is a worse hoarder than I am. None of our stuff can be displayed as there is simply too much of it.
I am going to try my luck with Craigslist and E-Bay.
CAROL: Isn't it such a relief to get rid of the drain(s)?
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I think I probably mentioned this before, but for anyone who isn't sure what to do with all their "stuff". It seems like I have tons ( plenty of books too ) and much of it falls under used never or only once or twice. Lots of kitchen goodies nearly new. I am slowly getting it together ( keep stopping to help Dh with some project or other---maybe I should have him stop his and help me ) and it will all go down to the local auction house.
I live a couple miles out of town on a one-lane road in the woods by a lake.....and it's peaceful and so very pretty here but one-lane roads are not a good thing when having a garage sale. Also, I don't really want tons of people knowing exactly where I'm ( really just the street ) located. In this town of 14,000 people many would have no idea of where my address ( road ) is located. The other BIG thing is ( and anybody that ever had a yard sale knows this ) even with a rock bottom price they will try and talk you down and several hours later when everything is picked through and looking strewn all over and shabby....some person will come along and offer you $10.00 for all the left-overs.
At the auction house the price goes up and there are generally no left-overs. If someone is not bidding well on something.....they will keep putting an extra item with that one....and someone in the crowd is going to want at least one of the added item or items and so the not so nice finds a home along with the very good things.
I had actually started this project ( triple sigh !!!!!! ) a couple of months before my cancer diagnosis which basically ( probably did for a lot of you too ) stopped every other part of my life a little if not a lot, and though I was done with all txs this past August a year ago......I am struggling with a long list of need to stop this and do this and then I can go back to auction goodies.
I plan to hopefully have echos' in my house. I yearn for the wide open spaces I started in this house with 6 years ago and one way or the other.....I am going to get thm back. It's a long time coming or will be......but I'm tired of the "warehouse" I've become. Someone else should have a lot of these things who can actually appreciate them and use them. Many are quite nice ( some not even used ) but they lack quite a bit as decorations which they are not.
I'm off and running for the day....lots to do. I'll be checking back later.
Jackie
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Hi, all. I didn't have a good night last night. Too much anxiety about the possibility of having to do chemo and the fact that my incisions aren't healing as well as the dr. would like.
Jo, your diagnosis info is very similar to mine. IDC, Stage 1, Grade 3, 0/4 nodes, ER+, Pr+, HER2 minus. You're a 5 yr. survivor with no chemo. That's encouraging for me. I dread getting the oncotype dx results back in a month or so. It's the Grade 3 that worries me. Yesterday I spent a couple of hours looking up women on the Oncotype Dx Roll Call to correlate their numbers with their cancer grade. Most of the high numbers were grade 3. All the low risk numbers were grade 1 and 2.
Alyson, I empathize with you as you worry about the lump. Am hoping that it's nothing bad. What is your weather like in Auckland?
Rita, I envy you playing all that golf!
When my husband's father died 5 yrs ago, we went up to IL to help clean out the house. It took two dumpsters to hold all the throwaway accumulation. Both my f-in-law and m-in-law were packrats and didn't throw away anything. They had the basement, attic, and a garage stuffed full.
I'm spending too much time on bc.org and need to stop obsessing about my health. But I feel like the women on this web site understand what I'm going through in a way my friends and family can't understand. I would like to join a support group here in my area.
Sorry not to be more upbeat. I really should be. A couple of golfing friends are coming by this afternoon to visit. Another golfing friend is giving a small dinner party for me on Fri. night. People have been extremely kind.
Wishing everyone a good day.
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couple of things regarding yard sales and auctions.... most ppl run out of $$ at the end of the month. My most successful sales were first weekend of the month.
We had TONS of books, mainly hard cover -- 14 bookcases full.... Then the ones in the attic that had accumulated over 36 years..... I donated to the Women's Shelter and Men's Shelter. Nursing homes often get TOOOOO many and let's face it, the old folks there are not much into reading. Try an after school program place. Some kids still read real books...
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Hi Chooks! This post will be brief (ha!)--have been recovering from attending a conference last week, plus chemo yesterday, but felt compelled to dash off a few notes.
JO I agree about not believing everything on the forums...plus staying away from some negative ones. I also agree that what you find on our "seasoned" women's thread is pretty right on target. I especially appreciate the insight that you, Jackie and Rita bring from your experience (my biggest concern is that I'll never be able to catch up with your activity level--quilting, home decorating, caring for DF--I feel like a slacker!!).
Carole I really don't know what to say--I sense the anxiety you are having over the possiblity of chemo. My diagnosis was similar to yours...relatively small tumor, clear margins, no node involvement, lumpectomy, BUT I'm TN, so was at peace with absolutely everything I could throw at the cancer. For me, it was a short term discomfort trade-off against the life I want to live for many more years. I just finished my chemo yesterday (began Feb. 13) and, other than being tired, and minor neuropathy with the Taxol, I walked through it easily. I worked full-time (took off chemo day and the day after). I go to a cancer center and onc who are very current on meds and making patients as comfortable as possible. I'll begin rads on August 24, so still have a way to go in my treatment plan. It is an extremely personal, hard decision to make, and I'm thinking of you as you weigh the pros and cons. (((((hugs)))).
Chooks--more later...Just know I'm thinking and praying for ALL Chooks, here Chook, Chook, Chook! Take care. Helen
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Hey JO Great to hear from you! I didn't have rheumatic fever as a child--did have terrible tonsils until tonsilectomy (I went from being sickly to being "robust.") I'm hearing the same comment you made about rads--am not anticipating problems other than fatigue, but can deal with that.
Yesterday was a really good day. Not only did I finish chemo, I saw the neurosurgeon who went over my brain MRI and told me he thinks the lesion that showed up is probably B9 (90%) and we just need to watch it. I'll go back in a month for a second MRI. It's very small (about 1/2" by 1/3") and he's not even sure it's a tumor. AND it was so reassuring to see that I actually have a brain!!
Well, back to closet cleaning and a nap! Take care. Helen
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Helen this is good news...and congrats on finishing chemo..it is a landmark..
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Oh my, not much to add here. Nancy, I would have never thought of the thin cash at end of the month...mainly I guess because mine is always thin..... but you are so right. The yard sales I went to when I first got here were with a cousin....and how the ladies do it here. They map out which ones they will go to and are in the car ready to go about 6:30 a.m. At first one will be a fair size group of women waiting for the garage door to come up. I never quite caught on here but I think the idea was swoop in----get all the "good" stuff then out and to the next one trying to stay just a little ahead of everyone else. Not my forte' by a long shot. For openers I wasn't sure about who I was at that time in the morning.....and you have to have coffee, breakfast, bath and clothes on and it is still dark outside. Not knocking anyone here but geesh I was only on the second table....first sale when Jeannie was yelling at me to get in the car -- but I can see how one man's trash is another's treasure. I think I would have to go just for the fun of the experience.
Carole, Jo is so right. I think a lot of people find that it gets overwhelming and scary to read on too many of the boards. I had never been a "member" of a blog before I came here and it was probably a good thing. Meaning that I happened on the thread that my friend Rita ( didn't know her until later ) started which was and still is all Illinois or former Illinois ladies. Somehow what little I first read had the ring of right to me-----( the ring of right is when a feeling/sound/burst of inspiration/pleasant tingle happens in my chest close to my heart ) and I wanted to be there. Since I was not even well versed in how to "blog" moving around in the boards was almost out of the question. By the time I was better on that score, I realized that cancer, it's course, and txs are very personal to the individual. It is interesting at times to hear how things went for someone else, but chances are you will have a lot of differences even if your diagnosis is close.
I very much needed to be in a "group" of people who were just like me. Even being with people I had known for years and even some family members felt odd to me---because now I was the odd one....the one who had cancer and I was acutely aware of this in the beginning at all times. Probably I made it worse by trying so hard to deny it. It was the blog that saved my sanity ( well I think it was saved anyway ) and gave me some of the strength I so needed to start handling what was happening to me.
I very much believe that we have many challenges in our existence and we never know who may be looking to us to see how we deal with something. I needed the other ladies and needed to hear that they met their challenge head on dealing with every blow that came and triumped over the lot of them. I don't have any idea who may be watching me to see how I do it, but I would like to think I am a ray of hope, a beam of light in someone's dark moment that inspires them to use their strength to survive as fully as is possible. So, I stay where I have always been comfortable, here and on Rita's thread. I do belong to one other group but ( another bc organization altogether ) but I mainly lurk there. They present a lot of fairly technical information to each other about different studies etc. I enjoy reading some of those things now and then.
Helen, you will catch up. My thing is that I am somewhat ( it actually is taking its time returning properly ) high energy in the a.m. but once I stop for lunch I'm wilting faster than lettuce left out for two days. After that I am forcing it more and more....and sometimes it is too much and I go off on something that is easier. I sometimes wonder myself if I'll get back what I had although the morning energy was always a consistent thing.....but it used to last later than lunch. That is a real blow to me. Still, as long as God leaves the breath of life in me there is hope for things to change for the better.
Hopefully when you get some good rest Carole things will look a little bit better....I mentioned this saying on the other blog ( I do quotes every day there ) just a day ago I think......God didn't say it would always be easy....he said it would be worth it. We have had I'm sure lots of turning points in our life, and now here is another really rough patch, but even if we struggle we will get through...even kicking and screaming we will get through. There are many here wishing you well and praying things turn out. It is what I wish for one and all.
Hugs,
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Oops, forgot to say....I am one of the ones that had Rheumatic Fever in childhood. Was 8 yrs. old. It started in my knee joints, but have had a heart murmur since that time. Some Dr's hear the murmur....and some miss it till I tell them last check-up it was there. It did not apparently cause any problems with my chemo and I had A/C X4 and TX4. Still going strong.
Jackie
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Thanks for all the cyber hugs and words of encouragement. I had a very peaceful day. Sat in my comfy recliner and read a novel. Whatever treatment lies ahead, I have some great examples on this thread of dealing with the challenges with courage and optimism.
Hugs to all of you.
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To All You Ladies:
Have you thanked Jesus today? I f you are alive, you should thank Jesus.
Have you thanked Jesus for your suffering and pain?
Maybe He is testing you in some small way.
Have you thanked Jesus for the roof over your head?
Have you thanked Jesus for the food in your stomach?
Have you thanked Jesus for the shoes on your feet?
Have you thanked Jesus for the money you have?
Have you thanked Jesus for a beautiful day?
Have you thanked Jesus for the sunshine and the rain?
Thank Jesus, you will find He will see you through.
Have you thanked Jesus today?
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Good Morning Ladies
I ask that each one of you pray for me. I have to go and get a mamogram today, and tomorrow I have to get my leg seen about, and get Herceptin. I need all your prayers.
Yes, I have thanked Jesus for a beautiful day, I have thanked Him for dying on the cross so my sins can be forgiven, I have thanked Him for taking stripes so my body can be healed. I have thanked Him for the roof over my head, the shoes on my feet, for my children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, for my husband, sister, family, church family. But I just can't thank Him enough for all he has done for me, and if I shoul die today, if He would give me the strength and breath I would thank Him and praise Him with my last breath.
Thank you for your prayers.
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