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~* The Waiting Room *~

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Comments

  • OG56
    OG56 Member Posts: 377
    edited July 2009

    Bettelou I keep praying for you too. My daughter lives in Omaha and I live in NY so I know how nice it will be for you to have dinner with her tonight. You are reading about hope and I printed a banner last week that hangs in my office that states " I choose Hope". Hugs

  • nelia48
    nelia48 Member Posts: 42
    edited July 2009

    I'm just catching up on all the happenings here.  I had butterflies in my stomach just following all of your "waiting" and hoping for news in all of these posts!!!!  You gals are so strong, believe me!  I just can't believe how long some of you have been waiting for definite results, etc.!!!!!  Horrible!

    I thought I was DONE with the waiting game. . . . until yesterday when I went to see my oncologist.  I had to have a port flush, and asked him when I could get the stupid thing taken out.  He said NEVER!  Then, he proceded to tell me that I will "most likely" have a return of the cancer somewhere, given the severity of my cancer and how long it had been there before I got treatment.  So I'm not to ask again about the port being taken out because I'll need it again in the future! 

    Well, that didn't set well.  In fact, it didn't set at all.  Where does that put me in the waiting room?????  Is there a "most likely" chair in the corner somewhere for me?????

  • mkibbetson
    mkibbetson Member Posts: 40
    edited July 2009

    Nelia - that is ridiculous!  We can not live our lives like it is going to come back - that means that cancer wins today!  Tell your oncologist that I said so!!!!  But seriously, sounds like he is on a power trip and trying to play God - he can't know. He just can't. 

    If you want the port out, get the port out.  Quite frankly - it is a simple procedure to get another IF you need it someday!

    I got mine taken out 3 weeks after last chemo - Screw U cancer!!!!

    Hugs

  • lexislove
    lexislove Member Posts: 277
    edited July 2009

    Just came in to do a check in...

    Bettelou and Linda - your both in my thoughts daily, still waiting I see...grrr

    Nelia - I do not even have words about your onc right now...well actually I do have some words but they arn't appropriate for everyones eyes Cool  What a comment to say, so what the hell are you suppose to do? Wait for the cancer to come back? He seems to think so....idiot.

  • fortunate1
    fortunate1 Member Posts: 467
    edited July 2009

    Well that's quite the bedside manner! If they grade doctors on that he gets an F---.

  • mmm5
    mmm5 Member Posts: 797
    edited July 2009

    Nelia

    Do not let him dictate your perspective! Besides what he said is not true. There are so many ladies on this board that have had much more severe involvement that are NED for years. I know four in my immediate circle.

    Stepaunt- 9 nodes no hormonal treatment NED 23 years

    StepMom - 4 nodes Ned 14 years

    Friend - 6cm tumor Her2 positive 8 nodes NED 6years

    Friend - 5 cm tuomor Her 2 tumor in lymph nodes  and 7 involved NED 5 years.

    You are in charge and you can be ok too.

  • OG56
    OG56 Member Posts: 377
    edited July 2009

    OMG Nelia tell him you are willing to sit your cancer in the naughty chair and him too!  But that you are not going to sit with either of them....My girl friend had BC both breasts 3 different types and 15 nodes and she is 17 years dancing with NEDCool

    Bettelou how did the visit to the pulmonologist go today? 

    Quick ?'s ladies do you think it is too much to be taking 5 mg of valium per day? I don't seem to be able to quell my fears without it, I have just never had to medicate before for anxiety. 

  • fortunate1
    fortunate1 Member Posts: 467
    edited July 2009
    Just a brief note to tell all of you wonderful women that I'll be gone for a while. A little vacation road trip. One of the stops is the Grand Tetons, can you believe it? The 'big breasts' is surely the place for me to visit this year.  You will still be in my thoughts, especially Bette and Linda as you wait for information, and Nelia as you thrash that doctor.   
  • jezzy234
    jezzy234 Member Posts: 127
    edited July 2009

    Nelia--That was probably a very hurtful , scarey point to hear from a professional.  What nerve he has.  I was so glad to get my port out and I know there is a chance I'll have the crapy thing put back in, but omigosh, what a relief.

  • lexislove
    lexislove Member Posts: 277
    edited July 2009

    fortunate1 have a wonderful time!!!

    We'll all be here waiting for some pics!!

  • bettelou68
    bettelou68 Member Posts: 151
    edited July 2009

    The waiting for the biopsy is just about over. Leaving for hospital in half an hour. Am very thirsty and hungry as I have been NPO since midnight. The pulmonologists yesterday were friendly and informative. They showed me my CT and PET scans side by side on the computer monitor so that I could see my lesion for the first time.

    We are staying in Baltimore tonight to be near the hospital in case any complications develop.

    Please pray for me, that my results will be benign.

    Bette

  • nelia48
    nelia48 Member Posts: 42
    edited July 2009

    Bette, I'll be praying for you!  This has been such a long, drawn out thing for you, and I know how anxious you must be today.  Great that you got to see the scans like that.  I will be thinking and praying for you all day today.  PLEASE let us know how it goes!

  • nelia48
    nelia48 Member Posts: 42
    edited July 2009

    Fortunate1, hope you have a great time!  Wish I was going with you!  I need to get away. . . . .Let's see, where should I go???????  Somewhere COOL!!!

    Thanks, all of you, for your encouragement!  I know this dr. is known for his inappropriate abruptness.  Kind of reminds me of House on TV!  But he's the best there is, so I try to set that crap aside.  Ever since the beginning of my journey a year ago, I've gotten the feeling that he thinks I'm not "on board" with my treatment, etc.  In fact, about two months in, he actually asked me if I was "on board" -- whatever that meant.  I was very aware that I didn't seem to have much to say.  I couldn't think of appropriate questions, I didn't cry, I just sat there and listened and said OK!  So I still think that he has the impression that  I am aware of the severity of it all and he was trying to do a "reality check" with me.  I do know how bad it was.  Gees!!!!!  The darn tumor was coming out of my skin, it was so big!  I did all my research on the %, etc.  So I was nice and just said ok, I understood, etc. 

    But it is just the reality of it all that I now have to deal with.  It's like he burst all the balloons of hope, faith, pressing on, getting on with life, etc.  How do you gals do it?????

  • bettelou68
    bettelou68 Member Posts: 151
    edited July 2009

    I am back at the hotel with a scratchy throat and a cough. The biopsy was successful in retrieving enough "abnormal' cells to do pathology on. We won't know until Monday what the results are.

    Tomorrow we will return home to wait. Resting in the peace of God.

    Bette

  • jezzy234
    jezzy234 Member Posts: 127
    edited July 2009

    Bettelou68---My heart and prayers go out for you.  I like how you ended "Resting in the peace of god".  That sounds very comforting.  Thank you

  • OG56
    OG56 Member Posts: 377
    edited July 2009

    Praying and praying and praying Bettelou for B9 results. 

    Finally a call from my BS it looks as if both of my breasts do not have any invasive cancer at this time. I do however have extensive pleomorphic LCIS in both  and since I have already had an  invasive breast cancer  I  guess I will be having  bilateral  mx. 

    Thanks for all the hugs and coffee and support it has meant so much to me to have you here. I am scared of more surgery so can anyone tell me what the mastectomy part is because if I can't have a DIEP I don't know that I am doing anything. Which I think actually horrifies my BS LOL 

  • sherry35
    sherry35 Member Posts: 155
    edited July 2009

    Best Wishes Bette-praying for you.

    Omaha, I was scheduled for prophalactic mx and bilateral DIEP for July 8, but due to the recurrance and radiation I can't have it now.  You can ask and discuss a skin sparing and or nipple sparing mx and immediate bilat. DIEP.  There is a really good video of the procedure from Beth Israel Hospital in New York.  The link is under the reconstruction link and was posted by Swimfan.

    I didn't have the surgery but did an incredible amount of research and appts with my PS before recurrance was found.   Hope this helps.

    As for me I was marked and simulated for rads today.  Now I wait until August 6th for start date.

    I will have to miss at least the first 3 weeks of school:(  As a teacher that hurts me because I live for my job, I just love it, but I know that my health has to come first.

    Sherry

  • bettelou68
    bettelou68 Member Posts: 151
    edited July 2009

    Linda, I have had a Mx, and it wasn't that bad. I am waiting to do DIEP because of my IBC. They make you wait a year. But I definitely plan to do it, and my PS is on board, even if I turn out to be Stage IV. I want my breasts, no matter how long or short the time I have left, and he agrees.

    This is another weekend of waiting. I will feel better knowing what these "abnormal" cells are, and what the Tx will be. Still looking to my Lord for peace during this wait.

    Bette 

  • OG56
    OG56 Member Posts: 377
    edited July 2009

    I just don't know what I would do without you girls. I wish we could all go out tomorrow night and have dinner and just talk. Bette I can not tell you why but I really feel that your biopsy results will be okay.

    Sherri it really stinks that the sneaky rotten monster has raised his ugly head but we are all here for you and praying our hearts out. I know you really love the kids, but you have to get through this and heal and then you will have the energy to give them everything they need. Do you live in NY?  The PS that I am seeing next week is supposedly "world famous" yada yada but no one on the boards has used him and lord knows women on Long Island have this countries highest rate of BC. That no one has had him as their surgeon concerns me....

  • sherry35
    sherry35 Member Posts: 155
    edited July 2009

    Omaha, I'm in Ontario, Canada.  I've got a firm date, and I know my health has to come first, but it just sucks! AGAIN!!

  • bettelou68
    bettelou68 Member Posts: 151
    edited July 2009

    Linda and Sherry, thanks for your prayers and good wishes.

    I am feeling myself again today. I was busy all morning and am even baking cookies now. I've been thinking that I feel too good today to be a woman with cancer! My onc called to check on me, but no news on the pathology yet. It is so late in the day that I am certain I will not hear until Monday.

    Sherry, use this time to concentrate on you. Be sure to take excellent care of you skin, and allow for the possibility of being really tired toward the end of rads, and even for a few weeks afterwards. I will pray the the rads really zap that cancer!

    Bette 

  • sherry35
    sherry35 Member Posts: 155
    edited July 2009

    Thanks Bette,

    I'm happy with the fact that my dr. says that they are taking me from a 100% chance of recurrance (due to pathology of DCIS cells spattered all throughout the tissue) to a 5-10% chance.  I'm going to be doing 25 treatments with 6-8 boosts depending on my skin's reaction.

    Still praying for good results, hope you get them Monday.

    Sherry

  • bettelou68
    bettelou68 Member Posts: 151
    edited July 2009

    Sherry and Linda, I have been up early this Sunday morning, praying for you and all my BCO sisters who are struggling right now. Praying for others is a blessing to me, as it takes my mind off my own concerns.

    One more day of waiting for the pathology. I have resolved to take each day that I am given and to rejoice and be glad in it.

    Bette 

  • OG56
    OG56 Member Posts: 377
    edited July 2009

    I too have been meditating and praying for all of us who are struggling to stay positive no matter

    what the outcomes of our situations. I am still waiting with all of you.

  • Tonda
    Tonda Member Posts: 12
    edited July 2009

    Waiting is the hardest part, I have a PET scan tomorrow, had a CT 2 weeks ago it showed a few areas (masses?)  in my left lung the largest one being 4.1x1.7cm,  on the results listed as nonspecific calcifications? I have had major pain in the left side when I cough, take a deep breath or just touch my rib area.  In March I had a pleural effusion in that lung, twice had thoracentesis but ended up having to have a pleurodesis because it would fill up within a couple days.  My original cancer was IDC in the left side, ILC in the right side.  Had a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction, which does not look anything like breasts at all.  I was also diagnosed with osteopenia and have been getting Zometa every 6 months.  It seems like one step forward, two steps back, but as long as those forward steps are there, there is hope.  Does anyone know how long the results of a PET scan take?  Just needed to vent/whine to my fellow survivors.  (I hope this is ok)

  • sherry35
    sherry35 Member Posts: 155
    edited July 2009

    Of course its ok Tonda, that's what these boards are for. And you aren't whining.

    Bette- I'm thinking of you today and sending my most positive thoughts and prayers your way!

    Today I'm waiting for my husband to stop being an ass. Oh what a day!

  • lexislove
    lexislove Member Posts: 277
    edited July 2009

    How is everyone STILL waiting today? Coffee? Extra strong?.lol

    Being Monday and all, I hope some answers can come this week to all of you waiting for these results. Especially Bette..you have been waiting soooo long.

  • lexislove
    lexislove Member Posts: 277
    edited July 2009

    LOL..sherry...I gave up waiting for my husband to stop being an ass a loooooong time ago.

    I feel like I have 2 children ...not one. Sometimes when I introduce myself, I say that I have 2 kids boy and girl ages 3 and 38. Woman always laugh at this..

  • bettelou68
    bettelou68 Member Posts: 151
    edited July 2009

    My news is that my breast cancer is metastatic, Stage IV. This is not what we were hoping for, but we will deal with it. Now making appointments with oncs to develop a game plan.

    I am choosing to rejoice in the Lord always. He is able to work this our for good according to His will

    Bette 

  • suemed8749
    suemed8749 Member Posts: 210
    edited July 2009

    Bette: I'm so sorry to hear of your news. You are in my prayers today.

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