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  • Cocker_Spaniel
    Cocker_Spaniel Member Posts: 1,188
    edited January 2016

    Just something to brighten your Saturday.

    A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said, 'Jesus knows you're here.' He near...ly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard a voice....say, 'Jesus is watching you.' Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. 'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot. 'Yep', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he is watching you.' The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?'
    'I'm Moses.' replied the bird. 'Moses?' the burglar laughed. 'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'
    'The same kind of people that would name their Rottweiler Jesus.'


  • slv58
    slv58 Member Posts: 486
    edited January 2016

    Cocker, I almost choked on my dinner! Love it! 


    image

  • anothernycgirl
    anothernycgirl Member Posts: 821
    edited January 2016

    Shari and Cocker!!

    HappyWinking thanks for the smiles!!

  • LifeAloft
    LifeAloft Member Posts: 69
    edited January 2016

    I just found out yesterday that I'm joining your lil group here. This is all so overwhelming and scary. I have at least 5 appointments scheduled next week and likely starting chemo the following week followed by surgery. I have a large aggressive tumor with one lymph node involved that I'm hoping responds well to the chemo. 

    I'm 45, just sent my youngest to college, this was supposed to be "my" time, instead I feel like this cancer is running my life, it's difficult to see a light at the end of the tunnel. 

    ~ Kelly

  • Angtee15
    Angtee15 Member Posts: 72
    edited January 2016

    Kelly! I'm so sorry you had to join us but you came to the right place for support and information. I am just two months ahead of you in this and when people say you start to feel better when you get settled into the routine of treatment, believe them! It's true. Chemo so far as been very tolerable for me. I'm 43 with no other health issues.

    You can do this! I found a prescription for Xanax to be invaluable to get me through all that early chaos and helped me sleep. Ask for something if you need it.

    Big hug!

    Angie

  • LifeAloft
    LifeAloft Member Posts: 69
    edited January 2016

    Thank you Angie, I appreciate it!! So much hurry up and wait. I just want to get treatment started. 

  • meadow
    meadow Member Posts: 998
    edited January 2016

    Welcome Kelly! Hoping you find lots of info and support here.


  • Mamiya
    Mamiya Member Posts: 151
    edited January 2016

    kelly, I think you will feel welcome here, great people and so much to learn from each other. I second the Xanax for the first little while, it really helped me cope (I don't need it now but without it at first I might have gone insane). Good thoughts your way for coping skills and getting started and making it through this, you will

  • Shopgal2
    Shopgal2 Member Posts: 594
    edited January 2016

    hey Kelly I am also new to tn and just finished chemo. I start rads next week. I was dx at 44, two months before my 45th birthday. Like notdoneyet I also took Xanax. It helped me a lot. I only took it at nite to sleep. It seemed like I was ok keeping busy during the day but at nite my thoughts would keep me awake and I would get really scared. I will say the best thing I did was join bco and start to read about tn here. Google scared me. The ladies here are really great on this board.

  • SA8PG
    SA8PG Member Posts: 280
    edited January 2016

    Hi Kelly~

    I'm so sorry that you are dealing with this. Please know that we are all here for you. The beginning is such a whirlwind and the mind is your biggest battle ground. Stay off Google! I learned early on that' it's nothing but doom & gloom. Please ask away, if someone can answer a question they will. One day at a time, one step at a time. You can do this!!!

    Sending you prayers, love & hugs,

    G

  • LifeAloft
    LifeAloft Member Posts: 69
    edited January 2016

    Thank you so much ladies! I was given Ativan, it does work well at night, I'm a little nervous to take it during the day thinking it will knock me out. 

    I think I'm still in the "I can't believe this is actually happening" stage. It's a roller coaster, one minute I'm confident and the next it's all gloom. Does that roller coaster start to even out a bit after a while? 

  • Mamiya
    Mamiya Member Posts: 151
    edited January 2016

    Kelly,

    I am 6 months into this and I still have moments thinking how surreal it can be, and like almost out of body experiences where I am not convinced this is really happening to ME. But that's becoming more rare. I remember the first non-cancer dream I had after a couple of months of crazy all cancer all the time thinking, that was my sign that I was starting to even it out a bit. I now take effexor daily (nearly eliminated hot flashes and helps a lot with anxiety) and ativan at bedtime and that has helped a lot (it is also an anti-nausea so often is just the thing to get to sleep without feeling queasy). Hang in there! You can do this.

  • LoveMyVizsla
    LoveMyVizsla Member Posts: 526
    edited January 2016

    My head is filled with song lyrics. When I was diagnosed, I starting making a list of songs of the cancer patient. It is helping me keep my sense of humor. The first song lyric I listed was "What Have I Done to Deserve This" from the Pet Shop Boys, and "Why Me" from Planet P.

    The coaster does even out, but I find my self freaking out before the next appointment or procedure.

  • Lou53
    Lou53 Member Posts: 30
    edited January 2016

    I don't have the nightmares that I used to but I still have some down days. I'm still coming to terms with this and some days I get really scared. Seeing myself in the mirror is going to take a bit getting used to. Bald and tired now when a few short months ago I looked happy and healthy. Guess I wasn't so healthy. I have been trying to work on having a better attitude and being more positive. It's hard sometimes

  • SA8PG
    SA8PG Member Posts: 280
    edited January 2016

    Lou it does get better. I know right now it feels like your in a time warp. To try and encourage you, This is a picture of me last year at this exact time and the picture below that is now. It doesn't seem possible honestly. I just finished stage 1 Diep so I still have stage 2 to do but after the year and a half I have had I can see the light at end of the tunnel. Praying cancer stays away for good for all of us & we regain our health. Hang in there. My prayers & love are with you.

    *removed images after 1 week for privacy reasons. You can always pm me for questions. Thank you.

  • Shopgal2
    Shopgal2 Member Posts: 594
    edited January 2016

    LifeAloft the roller coaster does slow down, esp once you have a plan and begin treatment. It is hard to be the patient. I feel like the roller coaster does get rocky before appts and before each phase of treatment. I get scared not knowing what to expect. And I am 7 months from dx and still take Xanax at times for my bc anxiety. my mo nurse gave me the best piece of advice to take it 1 treatment at a time as not to get too overwhelmed.

    And Lou53 I still feel Ike you; it is hard to see that person in the mirror that doesn't look like we did before. I look at myself and think is that me? But then I just smile and make a goofy face to know that I am more than my reflection. Be proud of your tough self. You are doing this.

    SA8PG the pic of you and you little one is so sweet. It brought tears to my eyes. Truly beautiful.

  • anothernycgirl
    anothernycgirl Member Posts: 821
    edited January 2016

    SA8PG, - BEAUTIFUL photos, - both of them!

  • LifeAloft
    LifeAloft Member Posts: 69
    edited January 2016

    Thank you all for your words, sorry we are all in the same boat, but it is good to know that much of what I'm feeling is normal. 

    Hugs to you all!

  • meadow
    meadow Member Posts: 998
    edited January 2016

    Oh my gosh SA8PG, you are gorgeous. The pic of you with the baby is beautiful. I have tears in my eyes. Thank you so much for posting these. I have been meaning to ask you how your recon is going, or rather the healing of the recon. Are you happy with the flap? Sending my love to you

  • Cocker_Spaniel
    Cocker_Spaniel Member Posts: 1,188
    edited January 2016

    OMG SA8PG I agree wholeheartedly with Meadow you are beautiful and your wee babe is too. I wish my hair looked like that. Whereas everybody seems to have come back in curly my hair was curly before and now is straight as. I really hate it.

  • navymom
    navymom Member Posts: 842
    edited January 2016

    Hello Ladies. Been awhile since I have posted. So sad to see so many new gals on this thread. Sending all of you positive thoughts and prayers.

    I loved all the recent jokes....Made me laugh out loud!

    Life for me is good. My son was home for the holidays. He has re-enlisted for another 4 years of military service. And will be stationed in the Northwest. A big change from Florida for sure.

    It has been over 6 years since I finished treatment and I just had another birthday. Things do get better the further out you get from dx. Hang in there and don't give up hope. Sending everyone a hug

  • LoveMyVizsla
    LoveMyVizsla Member Posts: 526
    edited January 2016

    The northwest is awesome, he will love it here.

  • Lou53
    Lou53 Member Posts: 30
    edited January 2016

    SA8PG, thank you for sharing the beautiful photos. They made me cry. To all of you, thank you for your encouragement and kindness. One day at a time

  • slv58
    slv58 Member Posts: 486
    edited January 2016

    SA8PG, you are so beautiful!! Your life force shines strong and your baby is so precious, what great pics and a wonderful way to show the new ladies that in time, we do return to normal (mostly!)

    NavyMom, so nice to hear from you! Happy belated birthday and thanks for sharing your 6 years! Yahoo!!!!

  • jenjenl
    jenjenl Member Posts: 409
    edited January 2016

    an awesome update NavyMom. Miss you.

  • SA8PG
    SA8PG Member Posts: 280
    edited January 2016

    Navymom. 6 years!!!! Wonderful and happy belated birthday. So so happy to hear this great news. Please thank your son for his continued service to our country. Xoxo

    Thank you all so much for your kind words. Cocker I get the hair thing. Mine was super straight before bc and now it's curly. Go figure. Lol. I will be 5 weeks out from the Diep Wednesday. I am up moving about again which was my biggest concern since I am home with all my crew. I see the PS Thursday so will see what he thinks for stage 2. Honestly, I am hoping for a long break from surgeries. I don't think there is a time frame to do stage 2 but maybe I am wrong?

    I am very thankful to be where I am, I honestly didn't think I would I get this far in the beginning. Everything goes so fast and you have no time to think. The Dr's tell you your cancer is aggressive and we need to treat it as such. It's like a hamster wheel and your left wondering will you ever get off?!?! As we go along we realize that yes, we do get off & sometimes sadly we lose dear sisters along the way. :(((

    My heart goes out to all the newly diagnosed and I know the others on here feel the same. Remember that there is great wisdom on this thread. I still ask questions and get feedback. We need each other to help lift us up when we feel we can't take another step & to laugh & celebrate the milestones and many blessings along the way. :-)

    Love you all.

    G

  • Luah
    Luah Member Posts: 626
    edited January 2016

    navymom: Congrats on your birthday and 6 years out! Good to know you're doing well.

  • LoveMyVizsla
    LoveMyVizsla Member Posts: 526
    edited January 2016

    I thought your hair grew in differently, but eventually went back to what it was pre-chemo. No?

  • jenjenl
    jenjenl Member Posts: 409
    edited January 2016

    My hair was the exact same after chemo - i was hoping for curls but it is just the same straight brown hair.

  • anothernycgirl
    anothernycgirl Member Posts: 821
    edited January 2016

    Hi NavyMom! So good to read your update!!


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