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Ladies in their 30s

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  • Denielle
    Denielle Member Posts: 13
    edited June 2012

    Born that is awesome, normalcy is so important for the little ones and special moments alone with Mom are great. Sounds like you had a blast!!

    Ami your daughter is so funny!! Just send the new baby this way, mine is 18yrs old not a baby anymore...Haha J/K!! 

    My Niece who is almost 3 made me a poster with her arm span (here little hand prints at each end of the banner) Between the hands my sister-in-law painted Healing Hugs because it is something I started saying after my diagnosis. In the bottom right hand corner ther is a little message. Sister-in-law wrote it but my niece has her little comment on there to this is what it says:

    Auntie Denielle,

    Courtney sends you a big hug in hopes that your "boobies feel better" (her words). This is the actual length of my arm span, so when wrapped around you it's my real hug!

    Love Courtney

    Kids are the best!!! She asks about my boobies everytime we talk...HaHa!! 

  • ramols
    ramols Member Posts: 310
    edited June 2012

    Who knew there were so many mom's in their 30s with breast cancer. I knew I wasn't alone, but it is a bit distressing to see how many women this affects. I am just getting oriented to all these boards, as I am newly diagnosed. I still need to learn a lot more and have lots more tests, but I have invasive ductal carcinoma - spread to at least one lymph node - in my left breast, and am awaiting test results on my right breast. I'm scheduled for a double mastectomy on July 10th - to be followed up wth 16 weeks of chemo. Having a PET scan this Friday and terrified of the results, but trying to keep a postive attitude. With an almost two year old and a 4 1/2 year old, I don't have any choice but to kick this thing in the ass and keep going. I'll look forward to following all of your stories and sharing mine with you. Thanks all for being out there and sharing!

  • lilypad
    lilypad Member Posts: 3
    edited June 2012

    Hi Ladies,

     Have been reading and following this thread. I am adding to it now that I have turned 30. :)

    It terrible that we all have to deal with this now, but I am conforted knowing I am not alone. I found my lump, quickly demanded that it get chevked and biopsied and within 2 weeks of finding it, have had it removed. I am now at a point where I have to choose between ACT/ TC chemo. This is is killing me. Heart Damage or risk of cancer coming back. I am told the biggest risk factor is my age. Did you ladies face the same decision? why and how did you decide what you did? 

  • MMTOMH
    MMTOMH Member Posts: 17
    edited June 2012

    Lilypad -

    I am young, my cancer is aggressive, and my heart is strong so I went for ac followed by taxol and herceptin. I 've completed all but the year of herceptin and had 3 muga (heart) scans, all is good so far!! Hope that helps! By the way, I have 4 kids at home that I am fighting for, so that makes me want to kick this cancer 's butt so hard that it won't even think about recurring!

  • leanne1980
    leanne1980 Member Posts: 3
    edited June 2012

    Hi

    I was diagnosed on Monday with Infiltrating ductal carcinoma. Thank god I was sent to a specialist after 6months of bugging the GP's about hard tissue in my right breast. Mammograms and ultrasounds showed nothing so he did a biopsy which found the cancer.  Surprise all round as no one thought it was that!

    MRI scan on Friday to find out more... Looks like surgery (whole one I think), chemo and Herceptin...

     Good to know there are others out there for extra support

  • lilypad
    lilypad Member Posts: 3
    edited June 2012

    Hi MMTOMH,

    Thanks for your reply. I feel the same, and am leaning towards the AC-T as well. I dont want to do this again. Always helps to know others who got through it just fine ! :)

    Did you get the scans through the chemo or only after?

    Good luck for the Herceptiin. Your kids have a strong mamma! :)

  • oandtolivo
    oandtolivo Member Posts: 20
    edited June 2012

    I just past my 1 year mark and the one thing that stands out the most is how I've grown.  I've always been a positive person, but this year has made me stronger and more free.  I do what I want how I want and live, live live.  It's hard because I have 3 young boys, but they are learning from me to live a full life and go outside the box.  It's scary and emotional, but so amazing.  I hope you all can find this feeling and live every day to it's fullest.  Chemo was the pits of hell for me, but I made it back to my wonderful boys and loving husband.   And for that I'm eternally grateful.   For those of you who are in a good place and like to read.  I just finish "Mum's List" by St John Greene.  I cried most of the book, but the message is clear and I will live my life to it's fullest and hope my boys will to the same.  Hugs Tracy

  • mckenna
    mckenna Member Posts: 2
    edited June 2012

    I was diagnosed with dcis a few days after my 38th birthday. Now I cant wait till my 40s they have to be better right? I recently finished 5 weeks of rads and I start tamoxifen on the first. I am scared of tamoxifen. I am a single mom to two kids ages 7 & 11. I have worked in the pediatrics cancer field for the past 15 years. All of you with young kids I can only imagine how draing it is. At least my kids can make themselves a bowl of cereal if I want an extra half hour of sleep :)

  • txmomof2
    txmomof2 Member Posts: 48
    edited June 2012
    Mckenna - Tamoxifen is a piece of cake for me!  I really have not had any side effects, other than maybe an increased libido!! Laughing
  • palmettomom3
    palmettomom3 Member Posts: 6
    edited June 2012

    So sorry that this thread is expanding daily. I am one week post surgery from a lumpectomy. This week has been full of good news and bad news. Met with my surgeon Monday. God news is they got clean margins from lumpectomy...bad news...they found three tumors...not just the original. Range is 4mm-1.1 cm. They also found LCIS. He recommends bilateral mastectomy at this point. Good news came this morning...I will not need radiation...hurray! More bad news...oncology appt in the morning to discuss my treatment which probably means I will need chemo.



    I meet with plastic surgeon tomorrow to discuss options for reconstruction. I know from a previous consult that I am a candidate for TRAM flap but I am concerned about loosing abdominal muscle. He does not do DIEP and there are none in my area that do.



    Anyone out there with experience in this surgery? How bad is recovery...honestly. if you chose te to implants how has that gone for you? I need to decide tomorrow since surgery will be scheduled in the next 10 days..help!!

  • Tookybum
    Tookybum Member Posts: 27
    edited June 2012

    I am a little older than my thirties (Although I still gfeel that way sometimes)  I have just turned 41 and found the lump 2 weeks before my son's seventh birthday - a couple weeks after my own birthday.  I though this forum might have some insights to help me out. My son is aware Mom had surgery to remove a bump that wasn't supposed to be there.  He has even helped dress my incision when my husband isn't around. But we haven't told him about the C word yet.  He is a momma's boy, very attached to me.  So how did you tell your young children?  We have been casual talking about cancer.  I have talked about the wonderful women I have "met" in these forums and even shared some of the funnies over in the "You know you are a cancer patient when..."  What are your thoughts?  Any input would be greatly appreciated.

  • mckenna
    mckenna Member Posts: 2
    edited June 2012

    i told my kids (7 & 11) after my meeting with the BS but before my surgery.  my son's classmate's mom had been diagnosed about 10 months before me so they had a frame of reference and i work for a cancer organization so they were somewhat familiar.  i sat them down, and said that i had been going to so many doctors lately because they had found a small spot of cancer in my breast and that the dr felt they could get it all out with a surgery and that i would likely not need chemo but would need radiation (they did not understand that concept, even now that it is over and they have seen the burnt skin under my arm, it is a very hard concept for them to understand).  they wanted to know if i was going to die and if i would lose my hair like "ted's mom" when i could give them a 99% no to each of those questions they seemed fine with things.  they did not want anyone to know i had cancer, they felt it was private.  i told them that was up to them but i was ok if they wanted to share my cancer info with a friend or other trusted adult.  i wanted them to know they could talk to me about anything but that they could also talk to someone else (sometimes it is easier to talk to someone other than mom).  they seem to be coping well and i have assured them that my dr's are all experts and know how to take the best care of me.  i also told them that i would tell them all the information i know and if the information changes and would always tell them the truth. good luck telling your son.

    txmomof2- i hope i am SE free as well!!!

  • Tookybum
    Tookybum Member Posts: 27
    edited June 2012

    mckenna - thanks for the info.  Very helpful.  Funny they wanted to keep it private.  I am going to wait as he is going to camp for a week and I don't want him worrying about me.  But what you said really helped.

  • borntosurvive
    borntosurvive Member Posts: 194
    edited June 2012

    I had dose dense AC-T and although I did not fair all that well through chemo (LOTS of side effects) I came out the other side and I am almost 3 months post chemo now.  I figured that I owed it to my boys and husband to do everything I could to kick the s*^t out of my cancer.  So I listened to my team and did whatever they told me to do.  I just kept thinking that I can do anything for 4 months (meaning chemo) if it means I can live another 40 years.  I know nothing is forsure but nothing in life is forsure.  I had to give it my best fight and try whatever I could.  There were many days I was ready to quit chemo but my kids were my motivation and still are.  It's a personal choice forsure.  I just never wanted to have any regrets or to ever say, "I should have......". 

     I had a double mastectomy (my choice) and it was fine.  I recovered quickly and I don't regret that decision or miss my boobs at all.  I have not even thought about reconstruction but if and when the time comes I'll do the tissue expanders.  At the end of the day, do what's right for you.  Give it your best shot and live life with no regrets.  We are ALL warriors and you WILL get through this xoxo

  • babysammy
    babysammy Member Posts: 34
    edited June 2012

    My oldest is 8.  We did use the C word, as I figured he would figure it out anyway.  I was just reading in his workbook he brought home from school.  He wrote a whole page about chemo, his facts were very accurate.  Very proud of him.  I do have my rough week after chemo, then im fine, so the word sick isnt used too often.  He has talked about it at school, so all his friends know, we live across the street from the school, so I cant really hide inside.  His teacher kept me up to date.  I figure that knowledge is power and it makes other women aware that it can happen to them and hopefully will be more interested in checking for themselves.

    I was just told which chemo I was having, no choice.  I havent researched reconstruction, but interested to hear others experiences.  I often have one of my kids (I have 4)  ask if my breast is going to grow back, I told my boys the only way I would have another breast is if I had surgery again, immediately they both snapped NO.

  • 11711
    11711 Member Posts: 3
    edited June 2012

    Hi cjanet,

    oh, men and relatives or friends would never realise what you are living...my husband was crying from day one till we get home after surgery....I never let him - and especially not my son- see me cry and my mom thought I was going to Athens for shopping, she found out a week after :) From July when I was diagnosed till now I;m acting that things are cool, I'm fine, strong and bla, bla, bla....I'm tired of this, it does not good to me. It's better to express your feelings and be yourself. 
    I absolutely agree with borntosurvive, and keep in mind that your babies are the best, the top, the sweetest medicine :)))

  • youngmom
    youngmom Member Posts: 1
    edited July 2012

    Hi all,

    My wife was recently diagnosed with Stage 1 BC (grade 3, 0/7 nodes, ER+) in her left breast.  She is 33, but given her family history (mom diagnosed at 33, died at 37), she decided on a double mastectomy with reconstruction.  Although the tumor was small (.9 centimeters), her oncotype score was 35.  Our oncologist is recommending chemo with 5 yrs of Tamoxifen.  Because the tests for HER2 have been indeterminable so far, there is a chance she will aslo need to take Herceptin.  

    We have an 8-yr old daughter and 4-yr old son.  They know that mommy had surgery, but they don't know that it was because of cancer.  My wife is an amazing person and a real trooper.  While she has been able to deal with the physical pain of the surgery, she is having issues dealing with the prospect of chemo and high likelihood of recurrence.  In her mind, BC has been stalking her since her mom died and now, despite an aggressive treatment plan, she still has to worry about it for the rest of her life.

    I would be very interested in hearing some of your stories so I can assure her that she is not alone.  

  • Tookybum
    Tookybum Member Posts: 27
    edited July 2012

    Youngmom - for sure your wife is not alone.  There are many wonderful women in these forum to help give advice or just listen.  I have only been here for about 6 weeks.  I am 41 (I still consider myself young as I have a seven year old boy)  Like you wife I have a stage 1 grade three tumour in my left breast.  Nothing in 5 nodes but I don't have a family history so I elected for a lumpectomy.  I don't yet know what my receptor status is.  I will find out this week.  I have my first oncologist appointment on Friday.  I hopefully will have the Oncotest done as well.  I am trying to avoid chemo if I can.  Anyway welcome - sorry you have to be here but like everyone in here your wife as you say is a fighter and regardless of the prognosis we all will worry for the rest of our lives but you have this forum where people are wonderful to listen.  Sending hugs and healing thoughts your way.

  • shevawn
    shevawn Member Posts: 13
    edited July 2012

    Hi, youngmom. Your wife's diagnosis sounds very similar to mine, without the family history. I was also Stage 1, Grade 2. No lymph nodes. ER/PR+. Tumor was 1.4cm. Oncotype score was 16. Because I was only 37 and a single mom of a 9yr old son, I purposefully chose chemo, even tho it would only reduce my chance of distant recurrence by 3%. (From 10%-7% over next 10yrs). At the time I made that decision, I didn't care about my hair or how sick I might get. I just wanted to make recurrence an impossibility (as much as I could). I only had 4 rounds of cytoxan & taxotere and, HONESTLY, it wasn't that bad. It went by very quickly. I started Aug. 3rd & finished Oct. 7th. I also qualified for a Canadian protocol of only 20 radiation treatments, thanks to my catching it early & seeking medical treatment quickly. I was diagnosed last June 20th. I finished surgery, chemo & radiation by December 23rd. I started Tamoxifen right after & just celebrated my one-year cancer free anniversary on June27th. I understand your wife's fear of recurrence. I know we all do. It's a natural part of survivorship. But, let her know that treatments today are much better than even 5 or 10yrs ago. The oncotype and BRCA tests are new to us, thx to continued research. My BRCA test was negative, btw..



    As young as your wife is and assuming she was otherwise healthy at diagnosis, I'm sure she'll live a long, breast-cancer free life. She chose aggressive treatment and that's what it takes - the courage to face down this disease & be stronger than it is!! I'd like to share my blog with your wife & anyone else who might find comfort in it. I know how helpful it is just knowing that someone else has been through these experiences. She is also welcome to write/email/call me anytime if she needs someone to talk to. Let me know if I can help!! My blog: www.shevawn.tumblr.com. email: shevawn (dot) akers (at) gmail (dot) com. Send me an email for phone info. :)



    Best of luck & much love,

    ~Shevawn

  • ksmatthews
    ksmatthews Member Posts: 743
    edited July 2012

    Shevawn I just spent an hour reading your blog!  You are an inspiration!

  • shevawn
    shevawn Member Posts: 13
    edited July 2012

    ksmatthews - thank you so much. I hope my blog helps others feel less alone & KNOW that if we can kick cancer's butt, there's not much else we can't do too! Never, ever give up on your dreams!!!

     

  • MarS676
    MarS676 Member Posts: 1
    edited July 2012

    Hi Ladies, 

    I am 36 and was just diagnosed on Wednesday (not sure what kind since I'm terrified of googling the terms in my pathology report.) The shock has finally worn off and now I'm in the terrified stage. The only people I've told are my husband and boss (she is AMAZING and super supportive!) I can't even begin to think about telling my boys (19 and 13) and my parents. I'm glad I found this site but sad to see how many women are going through this horrendous experience at such a young age.    

  • borntosurvive
    borntosurvive Member Posts: 194
    edited July 2012

    MarS676:  I sent you a private message

  • Delmarina
    Delmarina Member Posts: 1
    edited July 2012

    Mars, I was diagnosed on Tuesday. I wanted to keep it quite for as long as possible from my kids(19 and 7) but my daughter found out yesterday by catching a few words I had with a doctor over the phone. Even though I am so scared myself I had to comfort her and reassure her that I will be fine. I talked to all womens I know who had breast cancer and it helped a lot. I know it will not be easy but I also know that I will be fine. Keep your cheen up, we will get through it.

  • Cottontail
    Cottontail Member Posts: 64
    edited July 2012

    Well, my chemo is working.  The tumor is no longer detectable by touch.  I've got two more to go (next one is Thursday).

    I'm seeing my surgeon on Friday to talk about my surgery options, and now I'm super stressed out about having to make that decision. 

  • shevawn
    shevawn Member Posts: 13
    edited July 2012

    Listen to your doctors, assuming they're the best doctors. Make sure you're going to a good cancer research hospital! Once you find the best, LISTEN, LISTEN, LISTEN. Do whatever they say. They're paid to save your life!!

  • borntosurvive
    borntosurvive Member Posts: 194
    edited July 2012

    AWESOME NEWS Cottontail!!!!  It's good to know that your chemo is working.  The surgery decision is a tough one.  Just know that whatever you decide will be right for you.  You know your body, what you can handle and what is right for you.  Good luck in the decision making process.  Our cancer seems to be very similar except I was grade 3 and triple negative.  You have the option for hormonal treatments after your chemo.  They know what caused your cancer (hormones) so you're at an advantage already.  Good luck with those last 2 chemos and your surgery.  Keep us posted on how you're doing.

  • ksmatthews
    ksmatthews Member Posts: 743
    edited July 2012

    Had scans done yesterday and just got the call from my onc and all CLEAR!!!!!

  • borntosurvive
    borntosurvive Member Posts: 194
    edited July 2012

    HAPPY DANCE ksmatthews!!!

  • radioactivegirl
    radioactivegirl Member Posts: 7
    edited July 2012

    Yippee Cottontail!!  that is amazing!!  mine is getting smaller, but is still there.  Were you doing chemo first to shrink it to get a lumpectomy?  That is my plan, although radiation is starting to scare me now.

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