March 2011 chemo-lounge
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Sorry I have been MIA so long! I thought about all of you here and hoped you were all feeling well. I haven't had time to catch up on everyone's posts yet.
I am four weeks out this Wednesday from last chemo. My skin is like a lizard's - sooooo dry. I have tried every lotion and potion known to man, at least it feels like it, and haven't come up with one yet to do the trick. I'm drinking lots and lots of water too. My energy is coming back, somewhat slowly. Mojo, not so much. I'd better find it soon though, DH is probably tired of being patient. My eyes seem to have stopped watering so much. I'm still having hot flashes, but not as bad. Night sweats are better, too, more like hot head but still minimal hair so that helps.
Is anyone else having swelling in their feet and ankles? I have serious cankles going on. Not sure if from chemo or LE or dehydration or what. I had lots of lymph nodes removed when I had my hyster two years ago, so hoping it's not that. 100 degrees and humid here today, so could be that?
Have a good one, I'll write more when I catch up with y'all.
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Kay, stiltls and kristy: I had acupuncture for the past 4 treatments. Went into it a total doubter because I had felt so awful with the A/C and figured it only would work if you believed in it. It has totally worked for me! They say it is also kind of a cumulative thing, so when she focused on joint pain with the taxol, it was after the 2nd one of those that it really started working. I haven't had much neuropathy. I recommend at least trying it...my hospital has a grant so it doesn't cost me anything, other places may not have the same deal.
fluffqueen: yay for you! Congrats! I have my final taxol Thursday, and I can't wait.
Husker: I have been really sensitive lately, too. I think it's the end of chemo doing it to me. This has been such a crazy ride.
Is anyone else nervous about the end of treatments? Tied to my excitement is a profound dread. The knowledge that no one will be doing anything to keep the bc away; the only way we know if it's back is through periodic scans or other symptoms (that indicate mets!). That really scares me. I have a month between chemo and rads, and it will be so strange not to be visiting dr.s all the time. Trust me, the good feelings will overcome the fear (I hope), but it's definitely still there.
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Maxine - the chemo nurses told me some people have to be almost thrown out of the lounge they are so disturbed by finishing chemo, its probably going to take us a while to adjusting to the next phase and managing the worry that it will come back. After I have finished rads they just do a 3 month clinical exam - no scans or anything.
Its great to hear of those of you who have finished getting your energy back.
I have my useless port out tomorrow, then last chemo on Friday. Rads start 5th July.
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Okay, just lost my posting -- arghhhh!
Stilts - I started AC on Mar 4 so we are at similar stage. On Fri I'll have my second Taxotere of 4 (at 3 weeks intervals) so anticipate being done on July 29.
supersally - I use Cutemol emollient cream and Derma e hand and body moisture therapy and they help me. Good luck!
I am thrilled for everyone who has finished chemo or is preparing to finish - yippee! I know mdg is treating herself to Pandora jewelry and fluffqueen is doing a dinner party. What else have people done or what are you planning? I'd like to start to think about it now (dangling carrots work well with me...).
I am getting acupuncture a few days after chemo and a couple of days before chemo to help with side effects and build up my wbc. I can't prove a thing but do believe that I'm getting through it as well as I am because of this. My acupuncturist is very experienced and gifted. Depending on who you have, you may be disappointed in your results. Anyway, just chiming in FWIW.
Wishing everyone a great week. Penny, so glad you are getting that #$%^ port out!
P.S. mdg, still cannot get over your in laws. Happy for you that you'll be moving away...
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Updating to say that my last infusion of TAC will be tomorrow, I am so thrilled. Then a couple of weeks to get over the worst of the SE.
I contacted my BS's nurse and told her I was nearly finished with chemo and was anxious to get the re-excsion of my lumpectomy over with. So she changed my apointment with him from July 27 to June 30, and sceduled my surgery for July 8. Of course all of this depends on everything going smoothly tomorrow. I've had no major problems so far, so I hope I'm not jinxing myself.
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Jules: So glad this is your last round and they moved up your surgery date. That's awesome! Congrats.
Fluffqueen: So glad you are done. Enjoy that celebration dinner - you deserve it for sure. YOur parties sound fun...If I was closer I would pop in with a good bottle of wine for sure!
Silia: Yes DH's family is classless...don't know how him and his other brother came from the same stock. Can't figure it out...neither can my nice SIL. We have talked about it.....we are purplexed but feel lucky we got the two good ones in the family. I did celebrate with my 4 Pandora rings and we took a trip to Chicago a few weeks post chemo - we waited to make sure I had energy. It is nice to have something to look forward too when getting done.
Maxine: I can relate...I have had trouble feeling like now I am doing nothing to fight this. THe things I am am focusing on are the things I CAN do...diet, exercise and reducing stress. I am exercising 5 days a week and exercise reduces recurrence risk by half. I am following The ANti Cancer diet as much as I can to avoid foods that fuel cancer and inflammation. I am also making some major life changes - giving up the job I have had for years because it is too stressful. I will not go back to doing this once we move. I also plan to start some yoga/relaxation.... I need to find a better balance.
Supersally: I have super dry skin too...I think that is part of my itching problem. I put on Aveeno Anti Itch Cream three times daily at this point because I want to make sure the rash does not come back so I can have my exchange surgery next week. If the rash comes back...no surgery. I too have no Mo Jo. I was reading the Mo Jo thread last night...they have some good ideas and suggestions......I think my DH is tired of being patient too. Like I need more stress............
Penny: So glad you are finishing up! It's so nice to have more of you done with me!!!! I hope rads are a breeze....
I don't know who else I missed..Hi to all of you! The rash has been staying away...I have been off steroids since last Tuesday and PRAY it does not come back. My skin is very sensitive and dry...I think body hair is starting to grow again too so maybe that is also contributing to the itch..who knows. My surgery is scheduled for the 23rd (next week!!). I just want it over with.
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Anyone else out there getting weekly Taxol ? I have had 3 of 12 Taxol following the 4 AC and today noticed I'm starting to get "fuzz" on my head...didn't believe it's possible already but DH confirmed...
Really made my day !!!!
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Jules, I "graduated' from my chemo treatments June 3rd, am lined up for a couple tests (MRI today, PET scan later this month) and am tentatively scheduled for a lumpectomy on July 8, same as your surgery date. So, barring anything out of the ordinary on the scans, which the docs aren't expecting, I will be moving forward with that. It is an outpatient surgery, which did surprise me to hear.
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Stilts--I'm not on Taxol, nor weekly. I still have 2 TCH to go and I'm definitely in the baby orangutan stage. I never did lose everything and now have about an inch standing straight up all over my head. There's a new crop coming in behind it and it's about 1/4" long. I have my fingers crossed that it can withstand the next 2 TXs.
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Good luck to both of us, then, MrsM! My first lumpectomy was outpatient, and the worst part was the drain from the lymph node excision. I had it in a week. I won't need a drain this time, and an going to ask for local anaesthesia, because the general they gave me made me very nasious. My BS even put a little pump in my breast that put pain reliever in my breast for 2 days and we removed it at home. Very little pain involved with the whole thing (except for the nodes).
Good luck with your scans. Keep us updated.
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jules: happy to hear you you're almost done! And that you were able to get your surgery in sooner; get it over with so you can get the recovery over with...
supersally: I'm happy to hear you are feeling better! It's great to hear from people on the upward trend from chemo. It gives me hope that a lot of these SEs will eventually go away!
penny: Hope your port removal is as harmless as your port was!
penny and mdg: I am glad I am not the only one who is nervous about ending treatments. I agree wholeheartedly with doing everything that I can to prevent this from coming back (I really like the Anti-Cancer book). It's all we can do. Unfortunately (perhaps fortunately) control is not in our hands.
penny (and anyone else starting rads in July): there is now a July 2011 rads board; not much activity yet. I don't start until July 20. I hope all will continue to visit the lounge, of course; you all are a bunch of wonderful women.
silia: I would like to celebrate in some way my chemo graduation. I think the big celebration will be after radiation. For that, we will take a family trip somewhere wonderful. Perhaps a dinner party is in order for my chemo graduation...
Last chemo on Thursday!
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Well, perhaps I'm a little spoiled, but I try to celebrate every day in some way. It might be reading a good book, watching trashy tv, putting on make-up so I feel pretty, eating a healthy salad. I don't know, I just try to do at least one thing every day that makes ME happy. That said, it's important to celebrate with the people who have supported us, too.
Jules - be sure and tell all your docs about getting nauseous from anasthesia. That happened to me at some surgery I had, sick for days, and I tell them about it every time now and they give me good anti-nausea drugs to prevent it. Haven't had an issue since, knock on wood.
Silia - thanks for the advice on lotions, those are two I haven't yet tried. I used acupuncture a while back for a different issue, but it was very helpful. I broke my pinky and even after PT couldn't bend it all the way. After acupuncture, I could. I see a chiropracter every other week or so, I'm a big believer in alternative medicine and Eastern medicine practices.
Maria - praying the rash stays away and nothing gets in the way of your E surgery next week. I think you are right about the body hair. I'm two weeks behind you, but I did notice some strangely long hairs sporadically on my legs. Of course those are growing fast and well, my head looks like baby bird fuzz. My mom told me I had hair when I was born and it just got better from there, so hoping with the biotin, massage, creams, etc. it's going to be shoulder length by next week (ha!).
Hope everyone else is doing well and feeling good!
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GRADUATED!
That is the theme I am using as I just can't view it as end of chemo. I would be jinxing myself.Here is the cake my nephew a pastry chef made for me to take in to my session today. Well apparently I can't post photos. It said Jill's Chemo Graduation with a little grad cap. Had a pill bottle on it with jelly beans spilling out, a stethoscope and an iv bag. So cute. They loved it. I also took ginger ale with plastic champagne glasses and we toasted.
Our dinner at Capital Grille was fabulous and so much fun. The restaurant put the 13 of us in a private room. One couple's son-n-law is the sous chef there. Next thing we know, we have three $100 appetizer platters being delivered to us, along with some other ones with lobster,etc Delish! The stories we told were fabulous and hysterical (although my 26 year old son believes he may be scarred for life-way too much info about his parents and the parents of his friends!) We are not a shy bunch. Our waitress told us our group was much more fun than Mitt Romney and the Republicans who were in there early in the day. Dinner was great, and then again surprise, complimentary dessert platters and champagne toasts. YUM! And...I hope drinking a lot of liquid on chemo day includes booze, because I violated the chemo rule of no alcohol and had two mojitos and a glass of champagne. It was truly a celebration of life. The centerpiece was my framed chemo calender that I put a sticker on each week. On the final week, I put a graduation cap sticker and lots of friends phrases around the date. I gave each of my friends a small gift and said what meant the most from each of them over the past three months. We got by without crying and a lot was funny.
Regarding Taxol-I had 12 weekly taxols and herceptin (still going on that)-hair thinned dramatically but I can wear a baseball cap and still work out with my own hair. Everything else gets a wig. In my male pattern balding area, I think it looks like it is starting to come back in just a little, but I have been told it is not unusual to lose the hair after taxol is done since it is cumulative. I am glade I didn't go crazy and shave it as I have been able to work with my own hair for three more months. Bottom eyelashes just now disappeared and upper eyelashes are thinner. Eyebrows still there. I try not to touch them in hopes they will just stay stuck in their spots. lol. For dry skin which I have, I use Body Shoppe Body butter. Love it. the Shea one and the cocoa or coconut one. Ive also tried organic coconut oil which I like a lot, but it is fairly oily (duh) so I generally only use it on my breast area, and hands or at night.
Chemo-I am scared about ending chemo, and I wasn't even a chemo candidate other than it works better with herceptin. My onc doesn't do scan tests routinely, which is driving me crazy, but I figure I have 9 more moths on herceptin to wear him down.
Themes for chemo graduation-Found one online that used Remission Rocks. Thought it was cute, but for me, a jinx. (I am pathetic, I know). I only want to use phrases that are not ultimatums and don't predict a permanent outcome of any kind.
I had a great idea earlier and now I can't remember it. I'm blaming it on chemo brain. If I think of it I will post it up and someone can use it. I thought it was better than chemo graduation. Maybe I''ll take another shower and it will revisit!
Night all!
Jill
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Yesterday evening, when I finally finished my last TAC, there was not another single soul in the chemo ward. Before my chemo nurse unhooked my IV, ........all of the nurses and workers dressed up in crazy outfits and hats and sang several courses of "Hit the road, Jules, and don't come back no more, no more, no more, no more." They then presented me with a pink ball cap that says "Survivor". Not sure just how much I'll be wearing it. It was great fun, wish there had been others besides me and DH where there to see it.
The real celebration will have to wait until my taste buds return to normal and the nausea goes away. The NP put me on on a round of antibiotics because the vein they used for #5 looks pretty inflamed and nasty. Just one more drug to make me queezy.
BUT I'M DONE! FINISHED! IT'S OVER!
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Look at us!! We are starting to move beyond chemo and into our "new normal". Not sure how I feel about the term "new normal" but I can say for myself it certainly does apply.
Pasmith I can relate to the hair growth. I too have a half inch growth sticking straight up, followed with my stubbies. I cannot wait for the hair thing to take off! I need at least an all over covering so I don't get sunburn.
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Yay Jules and Jill!!! Your celebrations for ending chemo sound like they were fun.
Jules, when you get your taste buds back, what will you do?
Jill, that was on heck of a party! It sounds like it was a great time. Glad you could spend it with your family and friends.
Diagnosed 1/19/11 at age 36; ER/PR+; HER2-, 3CM; Grade 1; Stage 2b
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Jill, what a great evening that must have been. Hoped somebody took lots of pictures. A whole evening of memories-totally hilarious that you guys were letting it all hang out and what your son must have been thinking.
Jules, I think its great that your chemo center did that for you. My first week at my new place a lady graduated and the look on her face was pure joy-but nothing was done to mark the occaision. When they unhooked her she had tears streaming down her face but no one even patted her on the back. I thought it was so sad. I hope your antibiotic kicks in quick for your nast vein. Is there a horseback trip being planned for after your surgery?
I had a breast MRI done yesterday and thought it was pretty much no big deal til i got home. They told me to drink tons of water and keep moving to get the contrast out of my body. The only place I moved was from the toilet to the couch. I will never again eat whole grain Cheerios!!! I know I chewed those dang things but they kept coming up whole-pretty gross-sorry. I have had numerous scans and never got sick but apparently this is gamma something and the CT people use something else. I haven't been sick 1 time since starting tx-thats what I get for bragging!!
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Congrats Jill and Jules!!!!!
I have 2 more treatments to go and I cannot wait!!! I am just so ready to move on to the next step, and then the nxt, to get all of this behind me. I am ready to have a "normal" life again.
Good luck to all!
Karen
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Congratulations graduates Jill and Jules!!!!! I am so excited for both of you! I love that your nurses made such a big deal out of it. I suspect my hospital will be too snooty to do the same, but we'll see. I graduate tomorrow!
Sorry about the sickness lilylady. Isn't that just something: fine through chemo and then the scans make you sick.
I will meet my onc tomorrow to find out about followup scans/visits/exams. My number 1 question is, is the onc the dr. we will continue to see into the future for scans, etc.? Or is it the surgeon? I still have one more dr. to go (my radiation onc), but I don't think she is the one I will continue to see.
I know many of us still have treatments and surgery to go, but it is so great to see celebrations at the end of chemo. This has to be the hardest few months for us.
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Jill - What a wonderful celebration! That sounds like a truly awesome evening, the cake sounds great and how nice to have such a thoughtful connection at the restaurant.
Jules - that is nice that the chemo nurses made a big deal. No one said anything to me about finishing. I just wanted out of there, so I really didn't think about celebrating there so much. My celebration was my week long vacation last week.
Lily - I hope you are feeling better. I know it will take more than a little test to really get you down!
Maxine - I had my first follow up, post-chemo visit with my onc yesterday. I will see him in three months. I think that is the protocol, at least for me. I'll see the med onc every three months. I see the BS again at 3 months but I think that is more surgery related, not cancer, if that makes sense. MO said he will do blood work and physical exam, but that's really it. He gave me the script for Tamoxifen and he and the nurse told me to call if I experienced any bad SE's. I'm anxious too. My gyn onc that I see every 6 months does CT scans, now annually as I had cervical cancer in 2008, but it was every 6 months. I'm hoping he keeps doing that as that will be one thing to help alleviate my anxiety.
I had a dream about my hair last night. I dreamt that it was a 1/2 inch long and you could actually see it and I was so happy because it happened so fast! so far it is very light and maybe 1/4 in long? Funny that my brain is thinking about that ALL the time. I knew you all would appreciate that!
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Thanks for all the well wishes for being done. I consider it a big milestone. I have to say that all of my chemo nurses have been totally wonderful throughout my whole treatment.
Lilylady, sorry you got sick after your MRI, what a miserable feeling. Regarding the horse trip, I would love to take one, but very shortly after surgery, I will be starting radiation 5 days a week for 6 weeks. That will pretty much keep me tied down. I'm thinking maybe a short trip right before surgery if I feel well enough.
Colodisneylover, when I get my taste buds back, I will go out with DH and a couple of close friends and eat the most wonderful Italian meal I can find, including a big, fresh, green salad and a glass of wine. I have been told by the oncology staff to stay away from fresh veggies until about a month after chemo is over to avoid the danger of salmonella and e-coli. I have been able to eat a few coming out of my own garden though.
MaxineO: congrats on your graduation tomorrow. Hope all goes well for you.
Karen, just 2 left! It will be over before you know it.
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Congrats Jules and Jill! Sounds like you had wonderful celebrations. Hope things are going well for you Maxine. I think your last treatment is today.
Lilylady, sorry you're not feeling well. It sometimes seems crazy what gets us. I hope you're feeling better now.
Maria, I hope you're still on track for your surgery. Fingers crossed.
Karen and Colodisneylover, I think we're the same with two treatments left. I have one in two weeks and then the last in 5 weeks. On Taxotere, switched from Taxol. I am not getting any hair back on it. In fact every day, I have less eyebrows and eyelashes than the day before. It seems tougher on those than AC was.
Great to hear all these good stories of celebrations and people returning to normal or new normal. As TimerDog says, Look at us! Wish I could buy you all a real celebratory drink. Cheers and have a great day everyone!
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Well, TX #5 is in the bag. Nothing left to do but weather the aftermath. I think this will be the longest 3 weeks and I will be counting the days to #6. Not that I'm done with the chemo clinic but Herceptin alone is supposed to be easier.
The "graduations" and celebrations all sound like they were fun. I'm not sure if I will do anything. The chemo clinic is fairly large and busy, so I don't expect any fanfare other than being invited to ring the bell. I don't see anyone else bringing stuff in. We don't get the same nurse each time, and they have so many. I remember someone suggesting a fruit arrangement-- it ends up looking like a flower arrangement. I'm not sure if that would be ok.
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I am so very happy for everyone who has finished!! It's inspiring. When I "graduate" (still a ways off...), I don't think my chemo center does anything. I say that because I have not seen anyone finish so I'm figuring they just don't do that. I definitely like the idea of doing something for myself and dp and maybe a few other dear friends/ relations. I'm just not convinced I'd be able to enjoy the festivities as much as Jill did at her Capital Grille excursion. Hope everyone is feeling great (or at least okay these days). I'm gearing up for Friday's Taxotere. Hoping the onc may ratchet back my dose based on my extreme fatigue and losing the big toenail, etc. At the same time, I want as much chemo as I need to kill any runaway cells... Maria, SO PSYCHED for your reconstruction next week. This has been a long time coming, right?!
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pasmith: My chemo office didn't say a word. I too only had the same nurse twice...different for the other two chemos. It was rather impersonal there with a large chemo room filled with patients. No parties for me there....oh well. Still glad it's over. So you are done in 3 weeks...simply amazing!!!! It will get here...hang tight!
Lily: I so wish you were getting sick because we were out partying too much and got crazy. Hugs....I hope you feel better soon. Now I can't think about cheerios either.....blech!
Jules: Surprisingly my tastebuds were back about 2 weeks post chemo. I figured it would take much longer....I hope it's quick like that for you. I wish I were closer since you are craving Italian. YOu know I am 100% Italian right? I make some mean meatballs/sauce oh and chicken marsala too! YOu should top off that Italian meal with some prosecco....(Italian champagne....). It's my favorite to celebrate with! I also was never told to not eat fresh foods...ate salad and raw fruit/veggies all through chemo with no problem. I buy organic and wash good too......oh well.....never knew. I ate whatever I wanted.
Oh and another newsflash..I noticed I have hairy legs today! Normally I would not be excited by this but you all can relate. I guess I need to shave them! I have not done that it a super looooong time. Between that and having some straggler hairs on eyebrows to tweeze this is big news for me this week! LOL! Please tell me I am not the only one excited by such things.....I will spare the details fr "downunder"...ha ha!
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Silia: YEs..I had my MX on 1/27 and have been sporting coconuts since then.....so next Thursday is exchange day as long as nothing happens between now and then. I am looking forward to having softer, more natural breasts again but I know I need additional work on them...my doc anticipates I will need fat grafting done and he won't do that until he does nipples in 3 months....boo! He said on thin patients like me the upper breast usually looks hollow and needs to be evened out with fat. I had two PS's tell me I would probably need it so I know they won't look super good at first. I so want this OVER. I won't be done with things until Dec at the earliest. Now that we are most likely moving, I don't know whether to come back and have him finish everything or just find a new surgeon when we move. More decisions......oh well....one step at a time..
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Congratulations to all you graduates - love to hear about the celebrations, jules - you will feel like celebrating soon, have a great one like Jill's.
Maria - it will all be worth it when you have wonderful boobs - I would be tempted to keep the same surgeon - they all have different ideas.
lilylady - so sorry the scans made you bad. I was OK after the MRI it just terrified me at the time as I hat enclosed spaces.
Karen, Kay and Colodisneylover - sounds like you all graduate about the same time - hang in there only 2 to go isn't it.
My last TAC is tomorrow(Friday) - thinking that with the time difference yours is Thursday MaxineO - happy graduation. I have had the same nurse the whole way through but she is on holiday now so I said goobye to her last time - before she went to explained to the other nurse the best approach to finding a vein on me. I bought both of them little butterfly earings, they have been so kind.
Port came out yesterday - they did it with a local under twilight anasthaetic as I have a cold/cough, but didn't feel a thing.
Pretty soon we can all put pictures on with our hair back!
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Penny: Good luck tomorrow!!! It's the last one. Yippy!!!
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Weekly Taxol #4 of 12 tomorrow...
mdg: I'm so enjoying the "fuzz" on my head...will be overjoyed with hairy legs again !!!
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Maria, I bet you are a wonderful cook. Do you ship to friends? Best of luck with the exchange.
Penny, happy to hear you one and done. Also that the port removal went well. Now you and I will just need to get through our SE.
Hoping everyone will post when you get your new hair. My chemo nurse said it will start coming in in 4 weeks, but am not expecting anything great for a long while.
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