I look for other flat chested women. A rant.
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Bak, thank you. The WearEase is on my list of garments to try, as others have also recommended. How does the sizing run on that garment? I am fairly small but wear a larger compression tank than my usual clothing. The sizing of them can run so small. Since it's a mastectomy line, perhaps the sizing is more true?
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Hi Wrongchick...that would be awesome if it's not too big of a hassle. I may be able to find that book at our local bookstore; it's a massive place and has almost everything!
Where on the West Coast are you located? I'm in Portland and would definitely be interested in meeting up with other "flatties" in the area!0 -
Hi Having Faith,
I am just up the hill from you. I am a soon-to-be half-flat-chested. I have an appointment with my surgeon on Thursday. I am flat chested anyway so I can't imagine it is going to make much of a difference. It is amazing to me how some of the women I have talked to are incredulous that I am not considering implants. I am up for a flat chest convention in California. Where did you go for your surgery? I am headed to UCSF. Best of luck to you in your recovery.
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For everyone interested in Flat Fest 2012 iin New York - I created a facebook page https://www.facebook.com/FlatFest2012. Not much there now, but please put your suggestions for venue etc. up.
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I just had a bilateral mastectomy April 12th. So far I'm not planning on reconstruction. I like the freedom of not having to put on a bra and that everything fits so much nicer! So cudos to you!
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Hi everyone interested in coming to Flat Fest 2012. I put up a facebook page - although there's not much on it yet, but if you're interested please sign up so I can get contact information. I'm willing to do the organizing, but I need to get a ball park of how many might be attending.
Go to Facebook and search for Flat Fest 2012. Somehow the link I put up isn't working.
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RozieP, You will find wonderfully supportive ladies in this discussion group...all walks of life, all choosing to not reconstruct. Why needs more surgery after cancer??
I am happy flat, I am happy wearing small memory foam or microbead breasts...it is all working out well enough for me.
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I'm so glad I found this thread. Not sure if I'm facing uni or bi-lateral mx yet, but if it's uni I don't want to reconstruct. Bi is scarier to me at this point, but your attitudes are an inspiration.
I've always been relatively flat, late developer, never had more than small A cup. When I had the elastic wrapping after my CNB flattening both, I thought it actually looked kinda good. I was wondering if I can wear some sort of flattening bra on the remaining breast and look pretty much symmetrical.
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Ann-I thought the same thing. I had bilateral BC. The tumor on the right was thought to be larger than it really was. The surgeon didn't think a lumpectomy would work in that breast. I would be too disfigured. The tumor in my left breast, it was thought could be treated with a lumpectomy. I'm a runner & so is my breast surgeon. If I had a lumpectomy on one side & MX on the other, I didn't think anyone would notice. I was small (A-B) & those sports bras were very flattening. My surgeon thought it would be noticable & started telling me about "forms". I went the BMX route. Deciding treatments is hard. Wishing you the best.
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Just checking back in after a couple weeks "on vacation" in VT. Usually such a healing place for me, not as much this year. Thought I would get the strength and attitude back that I usually do there, but fatigue and pain just wouldn't let me get past it as well as I have in the past. Oh, well... next year....
I had been having much more chest/incision pain, worse when I get over-tired, just want to slouch shoulders, curl up, hug myself to get relief. So I tried a little experiment using snug bras + silicon boobs to see if the compression would give me some relief. Don't really know if it was that or the pain pill, LOL, but something helped!
I have been going completely flat (except for last night) for the past 6 weeks, and seem to be getting less self-conscious. But the swim suit thing is still a bit of a problem - I didn't have much to start with (A- cup!) but now I seem to actually have a slight concavity that makes me look REALLY FLAT in my swim suit. I am OK with that in our own pool, but feel self-conscious if others are around, so I have been wearing a cover-up and just sitting by the pool - how did some of you get to the next step in self-acceptance???
I live in TN, and wonder if there are some of you near the midwest, heartland, or south that would like to do Flat Fest nearer home than NYC? I would love to do the trip to NYC in Sept. if I am up to it, but the trip to VT has left me totally wiped out for days! (Will I EVER get my strength & stamina back????).0 -
Linda I got over it slowly now there is no holding me back.Go to beach resorts and cruises all the time, just wear regular tankini suits.No longer self conscious when I walk the beach.Give yourself time.((hugs))0 -
Mumito, thanks so much for the encouragement! You look fabulous!
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I have been a "flattie" for almost a year now. never considered recon. I so enjoy the freedom from bras in our humid Ohio weather. Clothing styles that work for us have been abundant the last couple of years also. My sister even pointed out that the mannequins at JC Penney have no breasts.
I recently returned from a Fla vac where I sunbathed topless at the home we stayed in-there were 5 other women there-my best friends for 45 years. They were somewhat shocked at how odd it looks-I always say I look like ET or an adolescent boy. They also couldn't believe how long my scars were. I am pretty sure none of them will skip their mammograms ever again. I don;t think I will ever get used to looking at myself but I wear what I want and stick my flat chest out and rock it.
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Count me in on the Flat Chested Fest- bi-lateral mastectomy, NO reconstruction- thank you very much- in January 2012...flat chested and proud to be so...if others don't like it, don't look.
Where and when are we gathering? Maybe we can get a group going thru the Wanderlust Festivals...
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I need to say this every day when I walk "Stick my flat chest out and rock it". I love that!!!!!!!
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No recon here. Had a bilateral mastectomy in Dec. 2011.
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Alexandria, I can't find the Facebook page. Searched Flat Fest 2012 and it returned 0 results.
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Feeling a bit envious of you guys with a BMX (who would have ever thiought that
.... I'm a uniboob; just began rads today so no bra for at least the next 8 weeks... I often don't wear a bra anyway (like before all this cancer stuff) but a few days ago I felt a bit self-concious for the first time and found myself busily scratching my right ear with my left hand (left MX) as I walked down the street. mmmmm I wonder why now - had the MX in February; probably with summer I am not able to hid behind a coat. So not as self-assured as I thought I was ... sob! My onc keeps asking me about recon - I think he harps on a bit about it cause Im youngish and single. I told hom i dont want anything foreign in my body; he said can use your own body bits; I replied I don't want any (more) scars for cosmetic reasons. If he asks me again I'm going to ask hiom why he obsesses so much about it and then gentle tell him to shutup!!!
Incidently was lying getting the radiation and found myself crying, crying and channelling my elder sister who died from BC in 1999 ... sometimes it just hits you that if not for this shitty bloody disease I wouldn't be at that place at that time doing that thing.
Got a bone scan next Monday 'cause my onc is worried about my ribs, spine and left hip.... haven't even finished treatment for the primary yet! Keep calm and carry on. A lousy day - sorry.
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Sian65, hugs for you tonight, and a shoulder to cry on.
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Said goodbye to the foobs! Screw it.......... they are too hot and I wear my flat chest as a badge of honor of fighting the good fight!!!
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Sian, sorry for the bad day at rads. I have had a few crying bouts during treatment.
I understand what you mean about being jealous of the flat chicks, lol. My friend is a uniboober like you, and when we were talking about how we manage, it was clearly more of a bother to "even out" the single boob than just deal with no boobs at all.
My shrink friend kept asking me if I wasn't all messed in the head over losing the boobs. I finally told him that he was projecting his own anxiety about potentially losing his balls. He sort of laughed and said I might be on to something.
Like you, in theory I would love to have new "built in" boobs, but I don't want silicone and I do not want to give up any more body parts in order to make boobs. Maybe I will change my mind one day, but for now I really don't see it happening.0 -
Ann Marie - How did you search? Try going onto Facebook first and then search within Facebook for Flat Fest 2012.
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I had a really good cry about all this last night.
I think my body is really cute. It is fun to look like the nine year old I once was, many of my best childhood memories rest in the 8 to 10 year old period.
The first day I ran across the street and didn't have breasts tugging at me? Awesome. I don't want to wear breast forms, they seem like a chore to me. I want my body, my way. My brain will catch up. I had breasts for a good 30 years, I am used to how I used to look. That look isn't better, it is just how I used to look.
I love the term uniboober. It's similar to unibomber, and it makes me think that there must be sass and talk back involved in the look, a bit of zing.
Sian- its all OK. Cry it all out.
I spoke with my therapist yesterday and I asked her how I can be compassionate with myself. She asked me what I would say to a friend, "it is all OK, you are OK right now, it is going to get better. You have made independant decisions that work for you and you are learning to embrace them, give yourself some time."
I can't find Flat Fest 2012 either...
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MT1, thank you for your self-compassion talk. I need to use that with myself- it is much easier to be compassionate toward others than toward ourselves. I have had a rough morning with pain issues, woke up at 3 am, cried from 8-9 am, dragged myself to a Thursday morning study group, felt better. It is VERY HOT here, so when I got back home, I put on my OLD swim suit that has soft cup bra, regular V-neck/halter tie and cute swim short bottom from Land's End, decided it doesn't look half bad despite the slight depression in the soft cup that isn't filled out with my body any more (OK, so let's be honest - I never truly completely filled it out anyway! LOL). Headed out to face the heat, drinking iced tea & sending lovingkindness to the world.
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Linda and Sian there is nothing wrong with a good cry ((hugs))and time will help heal.Enjoy the weekend ladies. 0
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Hi. Sorry about the problems finding the page. I think you have to search for Flat Fest 2012 once you're on Facebook. If you search with Google or other search engines, it's not going to come up.
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Did both, actually. Searched initially while on Facebook. Zero returns, so checked via Google. I will try again. Thanks.
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Just stopping in. I have surgery coming up soon ( no exact date yet). I don't plan on having recon because the idea of more surgery is depressing. While I wouldn't chose to be flat without good reason, I don't believe it will bother me that much. I've had 4 months while on chemo to think about it. As hot as it is here being flat will have it's advantages. I like the idea of the Flat Fest!
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Here the url, but the link doesn't seem to work here. If you copy and paste into your browser, it should work.
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Tack till alla! Thanks so much all of you guys. Day 2 of rads and it was better. Scared witless for the bone scan on Monday though.
Question.... after just 2 days of rads I have got a big swelling of the tendon that runs (little bit diagonally) from my armpit down to the middle of my ribs. Anybody get the same? Not lympodema right?
We need a Europe FlatFest - Momine are you in? Who else is sitting in Europe? I saw someone from France once I recall but did not note her name.
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