The Hermit Club
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Blondie- vacation will force to me to slow down and relax. You are right, this girl needs to dial it down a notch or two. I took things easier today and am going to bed early to get some good rest. I hope you sleep well my friend.
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Good morning hermits- off to get blood work done and a visit to the eye doctor for second eye test. Have a good day!
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Jazzy, why a second eye test? Hope you have a great trip!
Mags, hope the big D has settled down. I did not have chemo, so I don't know about preventative meds.
Teka, I sure do like the graphics you post.
Cami, what's Joey up to with his summer days? It's already bouncing around the 100 degree mark here, so I don't see kids playing outside much. But then again, kids don't seem to play outside like my kids did.
Blondie, hi.
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Big D and I had a quiet night. Started rumbling so I took Imodium and Gas-X before bed. I'm going to call the MO in a bit and see about a rx.
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Shore this weekend................
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did you know that every bull in the bull run is stabbed to death in the bull ring straight afterwards? A very cruel so called cultural event 47 bulls died yesterday for human fun.......who are the real animals?
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Hi hermits- I hope everyone is doing well today.
Sally- the second vision test is something called a detailed visual screening test and HRT (takes photos of the optic nerve). They discovered a few years back I have something called "drusens" that are small califications in the optic nerve that can affect your peripheral vision. I have them in both eyes, but where they are located in each sort of compensate for each other. However, I have noticed sometimes I leave things behind since I have some minor impact to my peripheral vision so I just look around to make sure I don't leave anything behind. No impacts with my driving and doc said today no change, everything is stable. I will never go blind from it, a question many people ask around this. So my vision stuff is done now until 2015. And thanks for asking about this too!
Mags- I hope you were able to reach the MO for something to help with the GI SEs.
Teka- shade looks so nice. Computers have their purpose, but nothing as nice as being outside in the fresh air.
Lily- I had no idea they did that to the bulls. How awful. Never a good thing to hurt animals for human pleasure/entertainment.
I went to lunch today with a music friend (Jazzy plays with him in latin jazz classes/groups) and he just had an appendectomy. Fortunately it did not rupture like mine did, and I wanted to go see him but we ended up deciding on lunch at one of my fav salad places in town (kale chicken ceaser salad). He wanted to get out for a bit so we did today. He has a blood cancer and goes for maintenance chemo, so this was hard on top of all that.
I could tell it helped him to get out for a bit to have something good to eat, but he was tired after being out for a short hour. I remember that well after my big surgery and encouraged him to take it easy and rest when his body says to. Takes a long time to recover from abdominal surgery no matter what kind you have. It was good to see him today, been worried about him. It was a good visit.
Jazzy is going to work on packing now and then has a massage later.
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Horrible about the bulls.........never knew that.......how inhumane.......where is PITA now...........they are more concerned about "furs" then killing innocent animals for the "fun of it"..........very sad........
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Interesting e-mail sent today from the one friend I told who "disappeared" after I got diagnosed. We have not really kept in touch much for a good year and a half. Today she surfaced on e-mail to ask how I am doing and talk about a few things. She lives back where I will be visiting this coming week but I have said nothing about being there and we don't have mutual friends so no way she would know. Well it looks like she will be gone on a trip this coming week anyways.
She made a comment to say "sorry we have lost keeping in touch." More like "you decided to go away when I got breast cancer."
I am not going to respond right now, I will park it and also if I do respond, I will keep things light and superfacial and won't say anything about my trip back to CT. No need to bring things up that will only create more explanations from me.
I remember Teka once said we can say something simple as "check ups going fine, no signs of reoccurrence." I think that is sometimes all people need to know?
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Wow Jazzy that's strange she contacted u now after all this time and Teka is right keep it short, BUT knowing me I would say Yes we lost touch, well I was busy with my cancer and u were busy with u'r life. I know I'm a bitch--That was nice that u went to lunch with u'r friend. It's good thing for him.
Lily after all these years I never knew that about the bulls, that makes me sick.
Sally we don't have extreme weather yet so Joey is outside a lot swimming and stuff, he comes in makes hos lunch and goes back out--he's 10 now. So there are lots of things to do, But when he's home it's computer like crazy and he tries to teach me, but somethings I've learned but others just to complicated for me. We do have the air on tho the humidity is a little high.
Good pics ladies
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Surgery follow up all positive on whats happened this time BUT, and its a big BUT, for the first time surgeon mentioned that maybe i would be happy to stop doing fat transfers BEFORE I had a complete "breast" as I am so difficult and had such an extensive and rare infection...........I could not even mention this til now as I am beyond upset.
I feel even more isolated and different now...........and I still cannot wear normal clothes as I am missing so much tissue above still, yes its better than before but still horrible.......and I am VERy aware of it living in hot sunny beach area where everyone has perfect bikini bodies, two breasts and doesn´t have to wander around like a hunchback hiding themselves, or sit down with an arm in front of their chest to hide side views etc................
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Lily I'm so sorry. Did he give u any other options? There must be something else or maybe waiting a while til u get more strength and u'r immune system is better?????
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He said before last procedure that my only option is fat transfer as so much fibrosis, necrosis and as result of rads I don´t have good blood flow there, its one reason why i am using the Brava. Iit seems my so called modified radical mx actually took some muscle away too, so I have ribs and skin in places, no tissue so harder for fat to settle.......it is better than it was before this last fat transfer, and feels better too, BUT its the first time he has ever mentioned stopping before I look normal.........and you can´t have fat transfer done more often than every 3 months, minimum.....he was not saying No but said review after each procedure.......I told him its already been too long since I have felt normal and it is no exaggeration to say every day I am hyper aware of my abnormality......and how I am just not like other people.
.I am a lot healthier than I was before but I am a difficult challenge clearly.........there is not even any room to put in a TE to inflate!!
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Teka - its very different when you have nothing on one side.........nothing hangs properly and I could never go anywhere hanging loose. I don´t even go out in the garden like that without a disguise on, and even then I feel ultra self conscious. I´m a DD cup so its pretty noticeable
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Hi hermits- got a nice massage to unkink my body before I fly this weekend. Going to relax at home tonight and then tomorrow finish up and get ready to go Sunday am!
Cami- my initial response I wanted to write was "thanks for touching base, you still SUCK!" She went on and on about going to visit some distant relatives next week who are aging and have cancer and on the way out. I thought that was odd to share, given how she has been with me but perhaps she knows she has been a turd and trying to make herself look good in my eyes. But I don't care what she does for others, I care about how she treats me. I may do a Teka and say I am still above the sod or just not respond and send a generic Xmas card. I think she is hoping we can just pick up and go on, but Jazzy cannot pretend things are the same.....
Lily- you really need some good reconstruction options. It must be terrible to live around all the bikini beach bunch with all this going on. I am sorry things are so hard.
Hope everyone sleeps well. Sweet dreams hermits!
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Jazzy i wish!! There is only this option. I consulted other surgeons before and none were positive and warned high risk of failure of DIEP, they dont seem to do TRAM here, no room for TE so lat dorsi not an option plus post rads plus post infection makes it more risky and difficult. I do agree with the surgeons as i can see and feel the challenges they face myself.......I am struggling to keep myself going really
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Jazzy u must be really serious talking in the third person LOL
Lily I wish I could give u comforting words but I know u feel terrible and like Jazzy said it doesn't help being around bikini people. And I'm sorry there are no more options for u, but I'll tell u what I would do if I were you, of course it's stupid but this is how I think. There is a new show on the E channel called Botched and they fix mostly breast and noses and do what other PS's have said can't be done and what PS's have screwed up but of course they have turned down people that they can't help but have help people that other PS's wouldn't have ever done--but Lily I write to everyone about things some I get accomplished and other not so much.
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Good morning hermits- slept well after having a good massage.
Lily- are there a couple things you know make you feel good every day? Do you know what those are and can you be sure to incorporate them into your day to help you along this difficult path? It is so hard to feel positive when things work against you all the time. Those bikini people may have their skinny bodies, etc but you are so much more than them. You are a fighter whether you see that or not (I do). You have your life and all the possibilities that go with the future. I want you to be happy again.
Cami- I like writing in third person, LOL! I decided I am not going to write back to that woman, but do the thing I had told myself I would do. I will send a Xmas card to let her know I am okay and that is it. I don't want to re-engage into the e-mails and lets pretend like we are the way we were. She cannot be the kind of friend I want in my life (you know the ones that don't split when things get hard). I have made my decision and feel good about moving on.
Last day before I head back east. Going to check in on line for my flight in an hour, head to aqua zumba and then do some music downtown for a few hours as part of the NM Jazz Festival. Oh and I saw Natalie Cole is going to be here in August and just got a ticket to that! I saw her out in Southern Cali a few years back and it was one of the best performances I have ever seen anywhere. Can't believe she is coming here! Diana Krall and Natalie Cole concerts all in one summer! I am one lucky Jazzygirl.
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Hi folks- fun afternoon (although hot and steamy here today) with the kick off of the NM jazz festival featuring a creole band. Great music and got to see a friend I have not seen in over a year and nice visit there.
Sharing a funny photo of some of the folks dancing. The guy without his shirt on in the cut off is a fixture in this town and always shows up shirtless with the cut offs at every outdoor music festival. He always gets out there and shakes his thang too.
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Jazzy again you make me smile. You are such a good friend and I know he appreciates the time you took to take him out to lunch, bet it made him smile also. As for the e-mail...you have to do what is best for you, she probably is feeling guilty about ignoring you and that was her way of reaching out, oh well your friendship will never be the same. I had alot of people who walked away the first time and this time I have friend that will talk to me and see me and honestly has gone to a dr appt with me, but can't deal with the whole chemo thing, so she never went and honestly neither anybody but the twins, my friend Rita and my dd2 went 1 time....which is why I would like to sit with someone is who alone at chemo.
Lily I am so sorry, ((((((((((BIG GROUP HUG)))))))))
Teka can you give me some I am uneven and since I am losing weight that is the first place it leaves...
Cammie....how is work?
Sally HI!!!
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Teka- good point! Most of the rest of us lather up with 45-60 SPF out here but don't think he touches the stuff! He has fun where ever he goes!
Blondie- yes, no doubt the friend is feeling guilty. I think I am okay just keeping in touch a couple times a year to let her know I am doing okay without the need for conversation.
My challenge this evening is to finish packing a suitcase that does not exceed 50 pounds. I put it on the scale and taking some things out. Jazzy wants to take too many outfits on her trip!
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Teka- aren't you a pretty thing!
I am watching Gravity on HBO with your boyfriend, George Clooney.
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beautiful. love it simple but awesome!!0 -
Teka- I saw Gravity in the theater earlier this year and liked Clooney in it. I liked that SB had the greater role. She has had some really good parts in the movies the last few years.
Going to go finish up some outside watering, and then wind down for bed. I will be away for a bit from this thread, but may pop in next week from back east to check in on everyone.
Until then, you all take super good care of yourselves and each other, okay?
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Happy trails, Jazzy.
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Jazzy ... Have Fun!!!
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Onco, good to hear from you. I always wished I could travel light even for a week. Our window attacking robin has gone away without us being able to find his nest. We have enjoyed other nesting birds.
Teka, thanks for super moon info.
My cosmos flowers are withering away. I may hunt for some new ones as I really like them. I have never had cosmos look so "finished" so early in the summer. I just have one pot of them this year. Maybe they like more growing room.
Happy Sunday everyone.
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Nice pics everyone. Oh Jazzy I hope u have a really great time and be safe. And u are truly a good friend.
We had a big storm didn't see the moon and didn't see the inside of the house without a flashlight, no power for about 5 hrs. I hate that. But today it's seems ok but humid. So now I'll wait for the next moon.
Mags how are u doing? I hope better.
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Hi Hermits.......just got back from the shore....nice weekend..........wanted to say HI..........hugs all.....
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