Lumpectomy Lounge....let's talk!
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Peggy, so sorry to hear about your husband. Hope he is beginning to see some progress. Please take care of yourself
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Peggy: Although I haven't posted here often, I've been a frequent reader since my diagnosis. The information and encouragement you provide have been invaluable. I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. It's so giving and generous of you to continue to share your knowledge and support here on these boards while caring for him. I hope you're making time to take care of yourself as well. Sending you lots of hugs.
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I echo what ChicagoReader said. Peggy, you're such a wonderful, giving person. Please take care of yourself and know you have friends all over the country who are sending you love and hugs.
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Peggy.....HUGS and take care of yourself too.
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PatRN10, I wanted to thank you for your kind words last week Hugs to you!
Peggy, I also wanted to thank you for your added hugs and wise advise to be prepared.
You are truly one of the guiding lights in this group. I think Bluedog said it well: you have friends all over the country (and I've no doubt more than a few readers of the LL are international), who are sending love and HUGS your way. Your days sound exhausting, but I hope you can find many quiet seconds to close your eyes, breathe deep, and feel those hugs.
Please don't think twice about not posting so frequently, when you have so much going on. Your presence is always here! (((Giant and Gentle HUGS))).
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Peggy Sorry you are having to deal with all that. You are a roll model that you support all of us while having so much to deal with yourself.
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"A village of loving arms...nay, a forest of them." Yes, exactly!! Reader425, yes it could be fear of hurting me. I will talk to him tonight. We have been so busy that we barely get a chance to talk. We are going to out to dinner tomorrow night for an early anniversary celebration. And Reader425, sorry about the emotional reaction. I imagine we will have these emotions for quite a while. Hugs everyone.
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Molly, I can relate when you said your DH doesn't handle some things well. My hubby (and true with most guys I know) thinks one of his roles in our relationship is to "fix" things. And cancer certainly throws a wench in that role! So DH gets frustrated when there is only so much he can do. (Maybe I should hand him the vacuum cleaner?-lol).
I agree with Reader425 and hope your talk goes well. It might also help to mention that his touch will not do anything to "spread" or "move" any cancer cells. Keeping you in my thoughts and sending many Hugs!
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Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Lumpie friends! You don't know how much all those hugs and jumping pockets mean to me. He doesn't seem to be getting well but they think his pneumonia may be clearing some. Guess we'll have to wait and see what happens.
You all have such kind words and I do so appreciate them. I'm just trying to pass along the positive attitude my DIL had when fighting through colon cancer. I've never run into anyone so positive while going through chemo. So I took my outlook from her. Although each of us has a slightly different experience with our surgeries, rads and hormonals, there's still a common basis where we can share good ideas. I know I benefitted from binge reading all the LL posts when I was diagnosed and told I was going to have a lumpy rather than Mx (which is what I assumed I would have). I think we all try to pay it forward to the newly diagnosed to make their journey a bit easier (on the mind if nothing else). We KNOW it is doable - just have to convince our new members.
Thank you all again for the great support!
HUGS!!!
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Peggy: and you certainly do that well—make it easier for the newbies, as well as help us follow your positive and encouraging lead! Good news to hear that your DH's pneumonia might be resolving! Hugs to you both!
ALL, thanks again for your kind words and support last week. I'm doing better emotionally (I think
), but still find myself tearful at very random times. Anyhow, I finally heard that my oncotype score was low (yay!) so I will not have chemo. Yesterday, I had the CT sim portion of the rad prep with a few initial inks. Everyone at that office was so nice, treated me like an individual, and I actually felt like they were listening to me—you know, like an ideal situation! How sad that sometimes a positive experience can feel so different from the "normal" experiences at a hospital.
So I feel much more comfortable about having radiation. The RO said that although my L breast is the focus, my chances of heart disease/related problems due to rad is less than 1%, and that "only" the top portion of my L lung will be affected by the radiation scatter. RO will be gone for a week, so the longer sim and the start of rad tx will probably begin in 3 weeks. And although that would make it about 10 1/2 weeks after my Lx, I've grown much more "zen" about waiting. Well, I say that now, but please don't hold me to it!
Hugs and positive thoughts to everyone! TTFN (~Tigger)0 -
((Peggy)) Those are the big hugs I wish I could give you in person. I will continue to pray for your DH. My son has been up and down since my last surgery. I worry about him so much and I know you are the same with your husband. Sweetmamaj, Congratulations on your low oncotype. I am so happy for you. Thanks to all of you for listening and understanding about my feelings.
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Thank you Molly! All these hugs are really appreciated. I'm in your pocket (that's why it is jumping all over the place!). You'll feel me Friday!
Good luck to everyone!
HUGS!
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Peggy, my heart goes out to you. My DH is fully disabled, though not at the level of needing skilled nursing. We've had to deal with his illness for many years, with many hospitalizations. One thing that I learned early on is to take care of my needs. Even last summer, when he nearly died with a bad heart valve and was hospitalized for a few weeks, I learned all over again that I simply cannot be there 24 hours a day. I HAVE to go home, get a good meal, play with the dog, open the mail, and do the laundry. I guess what I'm saying is, it's okay to take care of yourself when you're family is in crisis. No one is going to take care of you, but you. So, it's okay. Whatever you have to do is okay. And I hope you get the best night's sleep!
I've been following this thread, though I haven't posted much. You are all on my mind and in my pocket, trust me. I go back to surgery in the morning (re-excision). Hopefully, the BS will get it all this time. I heard from genetics today. Although the BRCA genes came back negative, there were two other genes that came back positive. Nothing I can do about that right now, so I refuse to be upset about that. I'll go see the genetics counselor next week, then see the BS about an hour later. I'm sure we will have lots to talk about. And I haven't even met with the MO yet.
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Peggy - thinking of you - keep up your strong spirit! You have been so helpful to all of on this board, let us now be helpful to you! (Dancing in pockets right now!)
SweetMamaJ - Yay on the oncotype score - now send me some of that good oncotype juju for mine! I want a low one too!!!
Molly - how did the convo go?
MLP - which genes came back positive?
Everyone else - sorry I haven't been posting much - we had a bad monsoon storm here in Phoenix, and I was without power for 24 hours - been frantically trying to save the food in my fridge, find a place to sleep, etc.
We're back on the grid, however, and all is well!Thoughts are with everyone!!
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Poodles, if there is anything harder than 24/7 caregiving to your spouse, I haven't found it. I did that for 4 years. Only help I had was when I had my lx last summer. And I was exhausted. I'm sure you are too. He left home September 15, 2014 and hasn't been back since - hospital, rehab and nursing home. (And hospital now). Like you, I've had plenty of practice on how to manage DH being in the hospital. I learned early on that I *have* to go home for lunch, feed the pets, eat, read the mail and emails. This hospital is 30 minutes away and I still am doing that. I also learned that I cannot go back up to the hospital after dinner. I need to do things at home. Of course, I'd go anytime if need be. As everyone says, if you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of anyone else. And that is so true.
You'll do well and the BS will give you nice clear margins tomorrow. Don't worry about things you can't change (i.e. genetics). When you find out something you need to share with family, then do it. Not until you are armed with loads of information. All is going to be okay! Make sure to rest!!
BJClaywell, thank you. There's nothing anyone can really do for me except what you are all doing: sending hugs and being in my pockets (I need bigger pockets!). It means the world to me. Just keep DH in your thoughts and prayers - he is sooo weak and sick.
HUGS!
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Peggy: you need county-sized pockets when things are going well for you. Better get larger ones now.
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Good idea, Queen
HUGS!
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Peggy have they got the c diff.under control?
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Tresjoli, they do not. He's had it (diagnosed, that is) for 4 weeks. He's getting Vancomycin for it now. They are x-raying him tomorrow for his pneumonia and seeing if that is clearing up. He's still dehydrated. Has the bed sore. And not eating very much (and even that is fed to him; he's not feeding himself). Very discouraging.
Thanks for asking.
HUGS!
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Peggy, I can get my sis the quilter (she is also one of us) to sew you some really big quilted pockets! Just say the word! Your DH stays in my thoughts and prayers...and Mustlovepoodles, will be thinking of you tomorrow also..and Molly50 Friday....hugs for all of you!
Octogirl
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Today was a good day for me...I had to head to Monterey for the day for work...sadly, a busy week meant I couldn't spend the night, so it was a quick trip back and forth but I did have time for a walk along the bay after my work meetings were done...the weather was perfect, and being by the ocean always soothes my soul. Any divers in the group (waving at Sweetmj) may recognize this as taken from the Breakwater/Coast Guard Pier. A favorite place both above and below the water (but yeah, that water is cold!).
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Cool Octogirl. DH's cousin in San Diego is a quilter as is a good friend (both on Facebook and I put them together - they hit if off!). Big pockets look to be a necessity! And I like pockets. You should see me trying to put my Note4 with OtterBox in the hip pocket of my jeans (and most are rather snug)! Keeping you in my thoughts too as you approach chemo. Not what any of us want, but at least it's there to KILL CANCER, and doable. Keep that thought foremost!
What a gorgeous photo!!!
HUGS!!!
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bj--the BRCA genes are negative, but there are some other genes that support the BRCA pathways. One is PAL-B2 and ChekB. These genes are not as well known as some of the others, but they both have correlated with increased breast cancer risk, and in my case it may be substantial--I have numerous 1st and 2nd degree relatives who have had BC on both sides of the family (my family tree is just loaded with cancers of all kinds). These genes are also connected with some other risks for colon cancer and pancreatic cancer, both of which I have in 2nd degree relatives. So, after talking with the genetics counselor today, I talked with the BS tonight. She is somewhat concerned, but wants to proceed apace and we'll deal with the genetics stuff next week and hopefully, we'll also have the oncotype back by then, too.
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Ladies, I did have a great time last week at my high school class' 70th Birthday Party Reunion! At our 50th reunion 2 years ago we decided we didn't want to wait 5 years for the next one so a friend suggested the birthday party. It was fun and great to see everyone. Here I am all dressed up (a rare occurrence):
Yup, those are 3" heels! I'm either in athletic shoes or nice high heels
HUGS!
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Love the dress Peggy!
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Great pic Peggy!!!! You look marvelous!! Hope you had a great time at your reunion. From the smile on your face I'd say you did 😀
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Thanks, Octogirl! One of my faves too.
Poodles, seems like I read something about those lesser known genes recently. I can see why they could be important for you with so many cancers in close relatives. But one thing at a time. Too easy to overload the brain, body and emotions. Step by step as you're wisely doing.
Nash, I did have a good time! Pontiac Central H.S. Class of 1963. About 60 from a graduating class of 436. Sadly we're losing members. And we lost quite a number early on with the Vietnam war. Even had two teachers attend! One was my philosophy teacher and he's in his mid-90s!
HUGS!
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BJclaywell, I'll do my best to sent the mojo your way!
Poodles, best wishes to you tomorrow--many hugs and positive thoughts
Octo, thanks for the shout-out! I'd recognize that place in the dark; found myself searching the kelp for otters. So lovely-thanks for sharing.
Peggy, wow-fabulous picture! And you rock those heels! I wanted to ask about the reunion, and what you found out about how your classmates put on their bras! Do tell!
Molly, keeping you in my thoughts, and will be in your pockets on Friday.
Hugs and xoxox to all.
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Mlp-good thoughts coming your way.
Peggy- what a darling photo!! I continue to think healing thoughts for your DH
Octo- I don't dive. But I grew up going frequently to Monterey and Carmel. So pretty!
Molly- will be sending positive vibes your way on your big day
Now that the surgical part of my treatment is over and I've moved on to tamoxifen. I find I have moments when the anxiety kind of gets to me. I was pretty calm through treatment. But, the idea that this pill will hopefully keep cancer away is very daunting. I'm sure as time passes the worry somewhat fades(?). Fortunately, school has started and my kids keep me very busy. But, I don't love the dark cloud that can sometime lurk in the background
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Peggy -- Best wishes to you and DH for a good outcome. My mom had Parkinson's... and my grandmother. Totally tough to avoid things like bed-sores and other complications. We were lucky in that both of them didn't have to be hospitalized often and lived a fairly long life (80s-90s)... but quality of life in the last years was not great with that disease. It's good that you're taking breaks as often as you can. Sticking around at the hospital all day isn't good for anyone who doesn't HAVE to be there! (as in-those who are admitted!). Take care of yourself.
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Venting here is OK. We all totally understand feeling low about this stuff!
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So, I finally got my Hormonal Treatment started... It's Anastrozole... for 5 years I think? MO warned me about hot flashes as a side effect, and needs the results of my last bone density test (stupid other hospital sent over the bone SCAN instead, and I specifically asked them for the DENSITY).
Not keen on experiencing hot flashes again after having gone through years of it already, but we'll see how it goes. I might get lucky and not get bad SEs from this. I figure I'm due some SE luck after the nastiness of chemo. I'm still seeing chemo affect my toenails, 4 or more months after chemo. Geesh. And of course I'm still running about with less than an inch of hair! Can't wait until cooler weather so wearing a wig isn't so hot...
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My scars are getting much better, but irritation and slight swelling under the arm still comes and goes--sometimes it feels fine, and at others I worry that I should check for LE. I still have hard seromas filling my surgical site... Makes things a little sensitive. But I guess it's keeping any divots away for the moment...!
But other than that I'm feeling pretty close to normal! Need to start going to the gym, now, to make sure my bones don't get all weak and to lose some of the weight I've been packing on! I went all the way down to 120lbs. during chemo but now am back to 145! Opps. (Just loving all those Coke Floats!)
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