new and future flat sister, with questions
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Hi Ladies from a very soggy UK today!
Firanch - Do you feel annoyed that the decision has been taken from you to have recon? I always think it's harder when options are taken away. Sorry I hope you don't mind me asking that and please feel free to tell me to bog off and mind my own!!! You are so positive battling something else as well as bc, you kick ass girl, you're awesome!!!
Ideism - you would be more than welcome to have my kids to do your shovelling, could be expensive to get them there though!!!! Haha!
TB - so glad you are happy with the outcome of your results. I had the same although with a micro met .7mm in my sentinal node although they didn't treat that amount so I escaped chemo and other treatment. It's such a relief for you. Onward and upward now!
I'm feeling weird about my bmx today, don't know why but I just sometimes look at it and sadness overwhelms me and then I know I don't want recon because it scares me too much.
Hope Bobo is comfy and warm at home and being spoilt!
Lots of love to you all,
xxx
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TB - So glad for your results ...................
Vivtwins - I have absolutely no issue being honest here ..........however I will need to give you some history before my final answer to this may be a novel.
Once upon a time I was young and stupid and got married at age 19. I got uterine cancer and a hysterectomy at 25 and Breast Cancer at 28 (lumpectomy). MY DH at that time viewed me as flawed and less than a woman. I made the decision to leave him the night I was laying on the kitchen floor sick with chemo , trying to stir the spaghetti sauce with him screaming , is that shit done yet? I told myself I had to live to raise my son (he was 8 at the time). I left that A**, and put myself through undergrad and grad school and raised my son myself until age 13 (married the current DH then). Another thing I told myself that spaghetti night was I would never allow anyone make me feel that way again . I was also convinced that constant stress contributed to both cancers. Many more great but stress filled years in corporate America. I retired early last year at 55 as I was worried about cancer again. Sure enough 6 months later cancer again........... . This time I wanted both breasts removed as I had dense breasts and wanted no more mammograms or any probability of cancer hiding under some implant.
My current DH said I don't care if I end up "carrying around just your head in a box" please just don't stop fighting . Life to me now is very different. I may not have as much money as I once had but all the money in the world can't replace family or give you peace. I am opting for a simpler live now , trying to eat right, remove the stress that I can and watching my DS turn into an amazing young man .
In closing when the MO told me that she could not support recon........I was actually relieved that I had made the right decision. Everyone has to make the choice that's right for them . I feel horrible hearing what you and Bobo have gone through. I stupidly googled failed breast reconstructions last night and was horrified at how many examples were out there. I have also made my final decision not even to get fitted for prosthetics. I may be flawed and flat but "I am what I am, and I am still grateful to be here " ..........................
Oh I did tell my DH if he was carrying my head in a box it had better not be Cancer Pink, LOL
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TB - that's fantastic news! I hope the other test confirms the results. You definitely are right to do a happy dance, and it's further proof that you focus on the positive in this crappy adventure!
M - Amoena is lucky to have you test their products! They don't realize how they have hit the jackpot with such a smart and knowledgeable lady! Maybe you can start doing paid consulting work, whether for their products or mx patients looking for advice of FoobMoires!!
Idesim - I hope you're done with shovelling and can enjoy a break before the next dump. We're supposed to get snow tomorrow, not sure if you will get some on Monday?
So glad bobo is home, it's so F'ing awful to be in the hospital. Hopefully no more setbacks for her.
ndgirl, gB, spookiesmom, and all - hope you are well today.
Viv - thanks for the picture of the rainbow! Sorry about the sadness - as you know, it's totally normal. Losing a body part is not natural, right? My son was cute yesterday, he was checking me out when I was getting dressed, saying "yeah, they're really gone. But at least [with the foobs], you look like you have some." I said that it does not matter, the important thing is that the disease was removed from Mommy. He said "yes, but at least my friends at school won't laugh when you pick me up". I found it a little sad, I did not realize that at 5 yrs old, they are already concerned about what their friends think about their parents. It will be interesting explaining chemo and its effect, if/when I need to have it...
Fiaranch - sorry about the dx and all the tests you will need to go through. I guess it will become part of the new normal, your new life... F! But as you say, it could be much worse... Just read your story, thank you so much for sharing! You are so strong, I am so proud of you (even if I don't know you!) for having taken the steps back then to respect yourself, rebuild yourself, and then de-stress your life. I really admire you and I am SO happy that your DH is supportive, you deserve it!
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I HAD MY RIGHT REMOVED IN NOVEMBER. I AM DOING good and healing good.I do have a marbel
size lump above the scar which concerns me. I called Dr and he said not to worry about it.Has anyone else have lumps
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Thank you for the welcome.
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Hi gunnergrandma, the only lump I had was the big one under my armpit that moved to the front and became a serious infection. I hate when drs say not to worry about it, how can they know if they don't see it? My only advice to you would be to watch if it changes, if it becomes red, and if you start having a fever. If so, I would ask for an apt to have it checked out. Could be just seroma that your body will absorb, could be another type of benign lump, or could develop into whatever. Take care!
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Gunnerman, good advice from oteb, maybe it could also be scar tissue starting to form.. not sure but if it makes you feel more content go and have it checked, peace of mind is huge at this time. I hate when drs. say dont worry, well of course we worry after a bc diagnosis! Good luck
Fiaranch... You are a strong smart woman, glad you kicked that bum to the curb! and more glad you have a good one now! Thanks for sharing your story. I was young when married too.. 18 (what was I thinking), anyway we have made it to almost 47 years, but the boat was rocking so hard lots of time, thought for sure we would fall out! Stay strong and we are all here to support you now, just an added plus!!
Viv.. that is such a normal feeling I think, I also have times like that as well. I keep telling myself I made the choice I had to and need to stay focused on no more cancer lurking, but still at times it hurts to look in mirror, I so hope before too long, new procedures will develop so we dont have to have the drastic surgeries. Sending you hugs, soggy dreary weather doesnt help our outlooks either does it? or at least for me it doesnt.
Hi to everyone else! hoping for a bobo update again.
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Thanks everyone for your positivity!
Fiaranch - I just PM'd you. What a bloody awesome woman you are! Thanks so much for sharing your story.
Gunnergrandma - I had a lump under my 'good' side where my breast would have been. Went into meltdown when the scan said it was breast tissue. I also have what we all call my nub on my right side where I had the implant removed as it had gone capsulated!!!!! If you are worried though push to get it checked. Peace of mind is so invaluable as ndgirl says.
I have just driven back and forth to town in the pouring rain to take my son out with his friends. I have just put turkey (I know everyone's had enough but we love it) in the oven and I am going to do half an hour on the treadmill (aka the beast).
Sending everyone lots of love!
xxx
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No snow here, 28°F and that is about as high as it will get today. Wind is blowing so it feels a lot colder. We aren't due for more snow until sometime next week. Stay safe and warm all of you in areas getting pounded by the bad weather!
Also hoping for a bobo update. Hope she is feeling a lot better.
Fiaranch, thanks for sharing your story. You are so strong, what an @ss hubs #1 was. Glad you have found a jewel now and he supports you totally.
otc, yep feeling fine. Will have to go out and do some errands in a bit but that is about all that is up for today for me. That is sad that as early as 5 kids are worrying about the physical appearance of their parents. Way too young to be having that sort of pressure.
gunner, good advice from all above. If it scares you, call the dr and get seen. Make some noise, your peace of mind is the most important thing right now.
viv, sad times are normal, I have some too, but I think they will lessen as time goes on. I know I did what I had to do to have peace of mind for the rest of my life.
Off to run some errands, will check in when I get back.
Thinking of you bobo!
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Wondering about idesim, maybe she has lost power.. sure hope not! Looked like Boston really got dumped on.
GrammB, not much snow here either but the &*#$ wind never quits! staying warm watching NDSU play for a "three-peat" in college football in Frisco, TX. son # 2 is there and it is his alumni college. if they win this year... 3 years in a row. Go Bison! 74 degrees in my living room
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Wow, you girls have been busy!
I have woken up with the biggest burst blood vessel in my eye, ever. WTF there's no white showing and it hurts a bit. Great, it is Sunday, no clinics open.
I watched the news last night and saw what is going on with the weather over there. Everyone keep safe and I hope you don't have to go out.
Fiaranch, what a woman! I am proud of you too! So glad you found this man, you deserve it!
What is it with the cervix and BC? I had the Pre cancer 9.5 on a scale of 10 for full blown cancer of the cervix at 24 years, right after having Bec,cone biopsy and radical diathermy fixed it. I've been catching pre cancer for a long time. I have read of so many women here having the same cervix Dx.
otceb, thanks for the kind words. I really enjoy the research on the Mx accoutrements! LOL Even though ny Mother had BC and I went through all her fittings etc, I wasn't aware of the shortcomings of some styles of clothing. She was older than I am when Dx, and didn't dress as I did at the time of my Dx. I kept reading posts from women who thought they had no option, but to cover up and live with just one type of Prosthesis. Nothing could be further from the truth. The only neckline I really avoid now, is the plunging V, and that's no hardship with all the other options out there. I've been banging on about the options available on the threads here for the past year.
I wrote to Amoena, which is really the only company that sells Mx prosthesis and some clothing where I am, in the country. I thanked them for the great service I got from the lingerie store in town, and also for the great products they have. Their company sales rep also came and spoke at one of my BC meetings last year. The Manager of Amoena contacted me and asked me if I would write my story for their magazine, which I did, and it was published in October in Amoena Life Australia, from that, they approached me to "test drive" the prosthesis, which I am doing now. It has been an interesting and fun collaboration. They are lovely people who are very interested and supportive. Even though I really had no emotional issues after my surgery, the writing of the story turned out to be very cathartic for me. I am glad I did it.
Very warm here today, and it looks like a lot of the tourists have moved on, there aren't so many boats on the water this morning. Chat later...Hoping Bobo is getting stronger...M x
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OMG M, that sounds awful.. have you had this before.. wtf is it from? That would FREAK me the hell out.... actually it IS freaking me the hell out.. you have a devil eye! Worried about you now.
All's good here Ndgirl, we got about 18 inches or so.. and now it's just freezing cold. Didn't mean to make anybody worried, I woke up so late this morning and just tucked right into washing the kitchen floor other general housework and did 47 mins on the treadmill.
My fav tv show ever was ER... so I am enticing myself to commit to the treadmill by re watching the series and since the episodes are 48 mins... I'm good to go!
Hmm.. my keyboard isn't acting up much!!!
Fia! You rock!! Thank you for sharing your story... he wasn't an @ss.. he was an f'ing douche bag. What a dick, honestly. Oh well, you probably needed him to appreciate what you have now. In total agreement with you on the stress situation and I am laughing my @ss off over your head is not EVER to be in a pink box
Posting and be back later.. last load of laundry to throw in the machine.
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Holy Crap M !!! Go to the Emergency room they are open. I am worried about you too . We don't need one more of us on this thread with some kind of infection !! all of these infections are now making me into a GERM A PHOBE
Idesim - Yeah George Clooney could make me get on the treadmill too . Get on anything for that matter he is still HOT !! LMAO
ND - 74 degrees would have me sweating and swearing
OTC - Good answer to your son but wow 5 year olds worrying about that
Bobo - hope you are better and check in soon
Hello to all ............... Idesim has not motivated me to go see if I can find some Clooney to watch :-)
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Hi Gunnergrandma.. welcome... I concur with the others... it's important to you and that is enough reason to have it looked at.. end of story!
Viv, your rainbow is gorgeous... and you live in a beach hut? That's fantastic! I too live near the ocean, I just love it.. we can only see it from our house in the winter when the trees are bare, but during the summer we can smell it and if the wind is blowing just right, we can also hear the waves crashing. How was your turkey? Yes, I am already sick of it I have to say lol.
GrammaB, how did you make out with your store over the holidays? I hope you had plenty of business.
Damn keyboard is acting up again.... insert a string of curse words here.
Ndgirl, I'm so excited for you! When does your fun filled trip begin? Perfect time of the year too.
Fia, you're doing pretty good if yesterday was the first day you got pissed what a double dx and having already gone through this sh!t before. Sucks that you will have a crapload of appts and test, all I can say is you better invest in a nice big bag so the we all can fit in comfortably.
TB! Awesome news!!! I am doing the happy dance with you!! This whole journey is bizarre don't even bother to question it lol.
Hi Spookiesmom... bet you're nice and warm!!
Otceb, your son is so cute, but I am in shock they worry about such things at 5!H
Haha Fia.. yes indeed.. love me some Clooney.. in fact, I'm going to go some more on the treadmill.
Haven't heard from Bobogirl, didn't want to bother her.. I will text her in the morning and check up on her. I'm hoping things are finally looking up for her.
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M - wow, take care with this red eye, I hope it's getting better. If not, I hope you can have it checked out soon. Have you had this before? Good for you and the other Aussie mx patients for your collaboration with Amoena, you're providing them with crucial feedback!
ndgirl - I hope your football team won! I love football, although I don't follow it much these days. I even used to play flagfootball in university! And San Diego, what a beautiful change from ND in the winter! We went for a family vacation last August and totally loved it, it's such a nice and sunny city, and I find people there are very friendly.
Idesim - oh yeah, totally agree with you and George and ER. I stopped watching it when he left! Good for you for finding motivation for the treadmill!
Viv - just saw the news and how the UK is getting drenched, good luck and stay dry!
Good night all!
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I'm warm enough now, check out our lows for Mon and Tues. Helloooooo heating pad! No dog park for us!
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Spookiesmom,, I would so trade you weather reports!! even your worst.
Otc.. yes my football team won 35-7!!
Idesim... I love love love George!! I dont care what he stars in I love him!! Glad you will be texting Bobo and will be waiting for update.
Good nite all!
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Ariom, that sounds terrible. Can you go to an emergency clinic? I hope it is better by now. That is so cool about the article and how cathartic it was for you. Who knows you may end up with some sort of job with Amoena!
ldesim, 18" of snow! Wow! My store did OK, not fantastic. But a lot of it is my fault for not buckling down and getting a lot more listed. I just can't seem to get the drive back.
OK Spookie, rub it in!! Those almost look like summer temps for here! Sunday here is predicted a hi of 18°F and lo of 12°F then next week is very mild in the 30's and 40's what happened to Winter????
Hugs!
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Count me in as a George Clooney fan too!!! What a hunk!!
Hoping we get some good news about bobo tomorrow.
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Ariom, I hope you get yourself to a clinic as soon as possible. I remember a pre-school mom telling me her mom was a nurse and she said there are 2 things you never mess with...the eyes and a head injury. Those words have stuck with me over the years.
Spookiesmom, those of us in the tundra would take your low temps any day of the week! We're in the middle of a storm that could dump up to 14 inches by tomorrow night. Ugh. Thank goodness I have a snowblower. I have to say I was afraid it would flare up my lymphedema, but it actually seemed to help it the other day. Maybe all that vibration shakes up the lymph fluid! New form of therapy ... plus I love the smell of the 2-cycle engine exhaust. Guess it reminds me of snowmobiling as a kid.
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Hi all! I have had a very loooong day in the ER in town! Not a good idea during Summer in a Boating Town. It was very, very busy. I did manage to have some very interesting conversations with interesting people. All the while in the background was the huge flat screen with the Cricket.Not just any cricket, but Jane McGrath Day at the Aussies v England test match. She was the wife of Aussie cricketer, Glenn McGrath, who passed away from BC. The entire Sydney Cricket Ground was a sea of Pink, even the players had pink hats to replace the usual "Baggy Greens", it was HUGE, they raised $450,000.00 for the placement of more Breast Nurses around the country, just in this game alone. They have raised over $12,000,000 to fund Nurses in regional areas. We have 2 in our region, and had it not been for Dianne, I wouldn't have found my way around as easily. She was a great help to me in many ways.
I hate Pink and I hate so much of the crap that goes down during Pinktober, but this Charity is raising staggering amounts of money in the McGrath name.
I waited almost 4.5 hours to see a Doctor, they kept apologizing and even gave me food while I waited. When I finally got in, just 5 minutes before my "I am Definitely Leaving" time, the young Doctor gave me a good check over and put a stain in my eye to see if there was a scratch. She couldn't find anything, and said it was just a really bad looking, broken blood vessel that will take a couple of weeks to resolve. Great! I could have avoided all that! Well at least I got it checked out and met some interesting people in the waiting room. I have to say I was a bit yucked out though, because 2 were White Tail Spider Bites, one was a young Aboriginal guy who was sitting next to me, and chatting, the other was a tourist.
I treated myself to a McDonald's Grand Angus Burger on the way home, so now I am full and wishing I hadn't eaten it!
I loved ER, the show too! Can you imagine having a Doctor who looks like George? I had a Gyn that was a stunner many years ago, just didn't seem right somehow!LOL
Catch you later...M x
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Ariom, so glad your eye is OK. Pretty impressive amount of money earned by that charity!
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M - so glad your eye is ok! Sorry about the wait in the ER... but now you have peace of mind and just have to be a conversation piece for the coming weeks "What happened to your eye?"...! Those spider bites sound awful, you definitely have unique creatures in your country. That is fabulous about the charity, it's good when they are for something specific and you can see and enjoy the results of their fundraising.
Spookie - sorry, no sympathy from us! Stay warm!
PRB - glad you're well equipped for winter and we can totally relate to smells carrying us back to our childhood. I think you might have something here, about vibrations helping LE, it makes complete sense!
gB - sorry your store wasn't more successful, but please don't be hard on yourself.
Quiet day ahead for us today before DS goes back to school. Brunch at a restaurant, groceries, take down the Christmas tree, meet a friend for coffee, and build a snowman since the snow should be stickier today.
Cheers!
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Had to come home early. 12" and 3 days below zero weather in Ohio starting today. Was worried about our cat being out in the cold. Going to drop 40 degrees today. Snow and -30 windchill here. Bet boy's school cancelled tomorrow. Ear bugging me with weather change.
Shoveled poop (cleaned stall). No claw. Didn't ride. Maybe next time.
OTC. So sorry about your 5 yr olds feelings.
ND. I'm so envious of your trip. Have a blast!
GrammaB. I think we all feel that way. I'm sure winter and holidays don't help the mood. I feel better if I take a b complex. Don't beat yourself up.
Hello Granwe!
M. Glad your eye is nothing serious.
Idesim. Way to go to find something to motivate you on the treadmill.
Hello to everyone else. Can't keep names straight today and don't want to lose post.
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M... sure glad your eye is ok, that happened to dh several years ago, everything was fine, but scary, agree with the statements that say dont mess around with eye or head injury.
Zills, seems weather is yucky many places.. such a winter! Riding horses sounds great to me, we used to have 11 of them,, palaminos are my favorite. They are alot of work too. Yes, I am so happy about my trip and spending time with my bf, and of course getting out of this cold.
OTC, read with interest about your 5 year old story... wow. you handled it well.
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what an ordeal M! Glad is was nothing serious... that sounded so scary. What was the ER ensemble? Is there a specific foob one wears to the ER? You make going there sound like a social event.. I am smiling over the recap.
Spookiesmom.. stop torturing us with your weather forecasts.. ok?
Zils, stay warm.. sorry your trip was cut short... DH is still away?
Bobo seems to be doing better although she never actually answered that question, she is obviously still unhappy over the whole situation. She got an additional week off of work.. not sure what the next step is for her or what she is leaning towards.
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Oh all right I'll stop. Those snowballs are COLD!
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Yes DH in NJ. Supposed to be home tomorrow. Funny story now but I was spitting mad and worried yesterday.
He got lost, had a flat tire, forgot to get tix on toll road, stayed in a hotel with no service. His brother was ready to call the police. No one had heard from him since 5 pm on Friday. He finally got service at 11:30 on Sat and was three hours late arriving. Said he was tired of driving and wanted to be home. Made me feel good.
He refuses to go thru Va. Will be driving into the storm. Hope he has a better time.
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Hi gals!
We do have a mixture of weather here on the board!!!! It's bloody freezing here, wet and miserable with another storm due overnight! Back to work tomorrow so whoop! My first official flat day! I'm excited!
Went out with the dog today and negotiated some fallen trees and extra rivers. I've done 7.5 miles on my challenge so far. But slow and steady will see me crack on!!!!
Ariom - wow your eye sounds painful, glad it's nothing serious. That's a long old wait in ER. Shame George didn't show!!!! ;-) I saw the Jane McGrath event on tele over here the other day. What an awesome thing to do, great outfits too.
Spookie - I'm not very good on temps unless they are in Celcius! I take it that's cold!!!! I don't know what I'm complaining about really, it's not too cold here, just miserable and dull!!!!
Zills - bit of an odd question but what is the claw?
Ideism - I wish I lived in my beach hut! I live about 20 mins from the beach but the beach hut is one we rent from our local authority. Google Sandbanks, it's the 2nd most expensive place in the world (apparently) to buy real estate!!!!!! So my Dad pays and we use!!!!! Haha! The turkey was a bit over cooked but nice!!!!
Otceb - Hope you enjoyed your day, sounds like a busy one! Well done by the way for dealing with your little one's comment. It's amazing what they pick up and learn.
PRB - I want a snow blower it sounds like great fun!!!!! Although having that amount of snow can't be that much fun. 1 inch here and the world stops!
Fiaranch - Hope you are okay today.
Grammab - Hope you okay today too!
Hope Bobo is continuing to improve!
xxx
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Well, we are getting dumped on here in Michigan. After 7 days without power from the last storm 2 weeks ago...I am turning into a survivalist! Gassed up the car so if the power goes out, and the roads are not passable...we can stay warm in the car. Geesh, is it spring yet? Bonus - my neighbor snowblowed the driveway early this morning...but it
won't be long before it needs a second go. This is like an
old-fashioned snow storm. Very beautiful, but such a mess.I'm thinking no school tomorrow. You would think my daughter would be bored silly since the first week of break we were staying at a friend's house because of the no power situation, and then we did nothing all last week... but in her words "anything is better than going to school". Ahh, the life of a 6th grader!
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