new and future flat sister, with questions
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OK, so I did the reveal today. Shed a few tears before taking off the bandage because I could see it was concave. I have to say I was surprised at how big the incision was. Not sure why my surgeon suggested it was 4 inches or so to my sister...because it's at least 8 inches. I hope she didn't take more nodes, because I had that done during the lumpectomy. Kind of worried that she saw something and decided to take more nodes. Surely she would have said something to my sister after surgery?
So, I'm adjusting as the day goes on. I've looked at it several times now and each time seems easier than the last. For some reason there is a small amount of what appears to be cleavage on the sternum side. I don't understand why...maybe it's fluid buildup, but if it stays, I think I could wear a V neck shirt and no one would know. Again, slightly worried that she left too much tissue behind.
Up until now, I have simply loved my surgeon...so I don't know what to make of all this. I could call her I suppose. The good news is that my drain output is very low. Last 24 hours was something like 37 cc's...so hopefully it will be down to under 30 cc's by Friday and I'll be able to get the drain out. Speaking of drains, I already hooked it on something and put a big tug on it...damn that hurts.
Other than that, still taking the pain meds, but am hoping to stop tomorrow. The only pain I feel is on top of my ribs and also the drain port site.. The nurse said the pain I'm feeling might be the drain pressing on a nerve.
I took 2 naps today... pretty sure it's the meds. One minute I'm fine, then the next I can't keep my eyes open. Like right now.. I am nodding off! OK, good nite to everyone...oh and I Fiaranch1.. that picture was fantastic!!!!!
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PRB ,
Your are still VERY SWOLLEN. What you look like now wont be what you look like in 3 months !!! Deep breaths .............I had my BMX 10.22 and am just not starting to see signs of reduced swelling and less redness in my scars . I have been faithful with using Bio oil 2x per day to improve scars . But don't try to use it before about 1 month of healing. We are here for whatever you need ! I am very focused of the Foob scarf pic . I swear I want to wear one out shopping ROFL........................
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Fiaranch, oh what a good belly laugh you gave me and my DH, he said "what the hell is that" and I had tears running down my cheek! Thanks for that, nothing like a good laugh. nope dont have one of those in my foob collection, but maybe should have, look like scarves, at first I thought they were those wrap around things that you warm in the microwave oven and put where it hurts, or to just warm up.. whatever they are it is funny!
Ariom, hope things get better for you, nothing is easy anymore is it? Take it slow and easy.
PRB, yes those drains hurt at times, I still think when I wear my bra for too long it rubs where the drain hole was and it stings or aches or does something like that, not sure how to describe it. Not sure if that could be fluid build up or not, I left my drain in a little longer than I had to because I didnt want any left over that the body would not absorb. yes, concave is present with me too, but not too bad. Take all the naps you need, and maybe a few more just because you can!
Bobo, told my hubby to look out he has another woman after him now!!
He got a good chuckle, said you gals must have a good time chatting together, love the humor here too. Not sure you would want him tho, snores pretty loudly!!Sweet dreams to everyone here.
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OMG you all I just figured it out !! Its like soap on a rope !!! There you go Wren figure out how to make Boobs on a rope and we can market it for shitty Pink FOCKTOBER . My personal request is Fuschia crystal nipples and a dragonfly tattoo !!!
Bobo I swear I have not put any pot in my vitamix soups !! My mind just goes to places most don't !!!!
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Woke up today with my back hurting (3rd day). Went to PT and she spent the time massaging which really helped. I have 2 new exercises with bands and she let me stop trying to do the flying Superman exercise. If I were rich, I would have a massage every week and claim it was medically necessary.
I made the mistake of bringing a can of kitty tuna home and now Goldie doesn't want anything else. I don't think it's good to feed cats just tuna, so I'm going to have to persuade her to try other things. Right now she's making DH feel loved by sitting in his lap and letting him pet her.
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Hi Togetherness, I am so sorry you're going through this. It's like 1 step forward and 2 steps back. Having to deal with all that yucky stuff is awful. I feel for you. I would leave it to the nurse too, trying to do it yourself would not be easy.
I know the scar issue is so different for every one, I don't know what it is that decides how we feel about them. I guess having seen my parents scars when I was young, with them explaining what they were and where they came from, may have struck a cord for me and removed the negative feelings, I may have had.
Fia! I really didn't realize they were meant to be scarves! Duh!
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Wren I am so sorry you're in pain. Do you have a beauty school anywhere in your area? When I was in the city, there were beauty schools and a school of Naturopathy where you could have treatments done for a fraction of the cost of going to a salon, clinic, or massage therapist. It is all watched over by professionals.
I have been having massages for many years, for my Rheumatoid. When I was working, it was once a week, now I can only justify every 2 or 3 weeks. I do get a rebate back for some of the appointments because I have private health insurance. I know if I didn't do this regularly I would be on more drugs and I would be seeing a PT instead of this therapist. M x
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I should check into that. We have both a big naturopathic college here and several massage schools. A woman comes to the senior center and does chair massage for low prices. I'm going to make an appointment for next week. And tonight I'm going to take the muscle relaxer my GP says I shouldn't (because old people fall, you know). Can you tell I'm still mad about that?
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You take that muscle relaxer, and remember, Doctors can be Bitch Slapped!:)
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They are called boob scarves or neck knockers. Etsy, pin interest, etc. can get them customized.
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Hey Zills, thanks, I just can't imagine anyone actually wearing those things!
I am a little less stiff this morning, just irritated by the cacophony of sound from the birds that have claimed the Fig tree. It is unbelievable, I have been out and turned the hose on them to stop the noise. It works for a few minutes and they are back again.
It is Thursday again, I just don't know where the days go! Today I visit the Opp Shop and my friend.
Quiet here today....check back later! M x
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M, I am glad you're feeling a little better. Standing by.
Idesim, how were your appts today? I wish I was more drunk than I am. Thought I would drink beer in your bag, but did not have any yet. Home and sitting in front of a pile of work after working all day.
ND, you had better watch out! Last night I had a dream that I was DOING IT with the newscaster I refer to as 'Superman' (Brian Williams). So, as you can see, anything can happen. Perhaps it was because he did a story last night on the all-girl Russian punk band Pussy Riot? I remember saying to DLLP, Ooh. I can't believe he just said that.
Fiaranch, who gives you those looks? I will come punch them.
Birdie, so sorry your back feels poorly. I say Better living through chemicals for the moment. Love my Goldie story -- love it when she is pushy. She came to you a mess. Now she is selecting her meals from a menu of her own choosing. You guys should not get into the cat-training business
PRB, thinking of you. Agree with the others -- this is not how it's going to look. Good job looking, but just know it is going to change quite a bit. Once it settles down, then you can be mad at your BS..
XXXXXX
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Wren, hope back is better, take those pills and go to bed, so when is that old, hasn't he heard 70 is the new 40? Massage sounds good, I haven't had one since mx, a full body one anyway, just neck and back in hospital,
bobo, I better be careful for sure, with your wild dreams, love it! Some days I would ship him to FL, but not for long and would be wanting him back!
glad Ariom is some better, none of these things are fun or easy, but sure hope you get the results you want.
our melting weather will be gone tomorrow, damn it!
Hi to everyone.
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Totally exhausted!! Ran a bunch of errands to and moved some furniture around in living room. Lightly snowing with wind out side, it feels good to finally sit down by the fire and try to catch up!
ndgirl, I love your DH's "looks like life" wonderful!
Ariom, sorry you are sore today. I suppose it is to be expected, but I doubt it will keep you down! Amazing how fast we forget all the contortions used taking a shower right after sx!
ldesim, I sure hope they get that construction done soon! And that the snow lets up for you peeps back there!
OMG Fia, those are hysterical!! What a "hoot" LOL, pun intended!
Togetherness, glad it helped you understand the process better. It does help.
otc, sorry about your hair. I didn't have to do any further treatment than the sx so I can't give you any insight on dealing with it. (((hugs)))
posting as a new page is next.
Hugs!
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Just realized that I missed a couple of posts above. prb, you're amazing! I can't believe how you have come along since the surgery! I thought my Surgeon had left me some cleavage too when I first saw my chest, but alas it was just swelling and it had flattened out in a few weeks. I am so glad it wasn't as confronting as you thought it would be when you finally saw your chest.
I am smiling at your description of the tiredness. I had it too, you can be in mid conversation and then you are overcome by tiredness, I call it the "I feel a nap coming on.....thud!" LOL Go with it, your body heals during sleep, and it has a lot of healing to do.
I was so sorry that our Bobo didn't get much nap time after her surgery. It sounds like you'll get the drain out soon. It's incredible how the different countries have different rules. Here it is when the output is under 50ml, it is removed. I think I had mine in for about 9 days. I am like ndgirl, I still have a sensitive spot where my drain exited, and I find it hard to explain too, sort of a burning, can't quite put my finger on it feeling.
ndgirl I am feeling much better since I have been up and out. I saw my friend and she filled me in on her week. She couldn't do her chemo and had to have a blood transfusion. She was there waiting to find out how my procedure went. She is so thoughtful and sweet.
It is much cooler here today and we have had a lot of rain which we've needed. I am going to make a cup of tea and spend some serious time with my V pillow on the couch.
Anyone watching True Detective? I just heard about it and will watch some today. I like both the main characters, so may be interesting. I am still looking for a replacement for Dexter, and what happened to True Blood? I thought there would have been another series by now.
Take it easy everyone....M x
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PRB, what you see now is not how you will look forever. There is still lots of swelling and angry stitches. It will get a lot better, really! Glad you are getting more used to looking at it. (((hugs)))
Wren, hope your back gets better quickly.
Zills, of course boob scarves, who would have thought? I'm with you Ariom, don't think I'd ever wear it out in public, but it would be a good joke to play on someone.
Ariom, glad you are feeling better today. Hope you find some treasures at the Opp shop!
Yeah, ndgirl, our melting weather was gone this afternoon. It is snowing like crazy outside right now!
Hugs for everyone!!
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Hi gB, I just knew you'd be there as soon as I left, how funny that timing always seems to be!
Step away from the furniture!
You're unreal, if you aren't shoveling and chipping ice, you're shifting furniture! Stop! Take it easy, for a bit, you've had rough time with all the outages and the cold.
It is snowing again, so you'll be at it again, soon enough!
I am exhausted just thinking about what you've had to do recently!
I am pouting and petulant because I can't sit in the spa. I would love to be out there today with a book, but alas I am too afraid of another infection to risk it.
It is so quiet here with Dex at the kennel, but he will be returned tomorrow, and I will have the full force of doggie love draped across my chest! That's why he goes for a little holiday when I have surgery, he's too boisterous for me to manage in the first few days. Fortunately he loves it there and gets to play with the dogs that are pining, he doesn't pine, but keeps them distracted. The owners of the kennel really like him and let him into the house with them, and even occasionally take him shopping in their truck to the feed store for the horses food. He's a spoiled little boy our Dex.
Take it easy everyone...M x
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Hi All,
I know I have been MIA for a bit, but so much has been going on. I had an echo, which was fine as usual. Next I was sent to a cardiologist who was quite nice and really spent time with me. Monday I will have a "pharmacological stress test" to see if any of my arteries are blocked. I've had a problem with my heart racing and shortness of breath and now they want to "be sure". I still haven't figured out how I will breathe as they are racing my heart! Today I had to see my PCP who sent me to the hospital for a sonogram of my left arm to see if I have blood clots! The tech told me he didn't see any so now I have to figure out why my arm hurts and feels like a tight rubber band is running from my wrist to my underarm! ( north and south, not around.) All this in the past three days! I won't bore you with anything from before that! My DD2 keeps telling me I am mean since my diagnosis and my husband sleeps at night, gets up for 2 hours in the late morning or early noon, goes back to sleep for 6-8 hours, gets up for a few hours and repeats. I know he is depressed, but he doesn't want to do anything about it but self medicate! He had to get up yesterday to bring me to the cardiologist who is almost two hours away and again today to take his mom' scar to be serviced. So I guess he was tired and became quite aggravated with me saying ,"why do you want to have lymphadema, that's all you ever talk about." (Since I got back after him, he asked me where I had gone.) well, I don't want lymphadema, I have just been baffled by my arm! My mother did have it and I am probably more aware, but my fing arm really hurts and no one in the entire state of VA is helping me! So there you have it. I really didn't want to boo hoo and have a pity party tonight. Fing cancer! I hope everyone is hanging in! As too many little girls sang, " the sun will come up tomorrow...". Hopefully I will rise and get a grip. Always Susan
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Hello! I've been busy working (when not at the hospital), kinda of looking forward to my few days off with chemo happening tomorrow! Ha!
PRB, I am jumping for joy for your new outlook! Your posts are night and day from before surgery! Re. how your area looks, like the others have said, you are swollen at the moment. Something else that might be coming into play are your ribs: I too thought that the BS had left breast tissue since I have a bump on each side of my sternum. My BS reassured me that all the tissue was removed, but I have some ribs that are protruding. Weird, I never knew our ribs could be like that. Anyway, it's possible that yours are like this too. As for drains, don't be in a rush to get them removed, you want all the fluid out. I'm glad you're resting and napping!
Hi Zills, the lymphedema clinic yesterday was interesting. I just found a pdf on the web that has some of the content the PT discussed:
http://www.theprincessmargaret.ca/en/PatientsFamil...
If the link does not work, you can google "Princess Margaret Hospital lymphedema". There's also a video on that site, I have not looked at it. One thing I learned is the importance of deep breathing - I'm not the kind to relax, I'm always go, go, go, but there's actually a physical benefit to taking deep breaths as it expands our chest and gets the lymph circulating. So they recommend deep breathing before doing the series of LE massages. Finally, my other lesson learned is that everyone's LE is different, our bodies all react differently, so it's important to observe how our own body reacts, to know what triggers LE for us. The PT suggested for me to try running without my sleeve (e.g. I hope not to have to wear it in the summer), then see if I swell. Or maybe not wear it during exercise, but put it on for 2 hours after. Anyway, all interesting.
Good for you for making your funeral arrangements. My mother was a funeral director for many years, so this subject was never taboo in our house!
Togertherness, I'm sorry I forgot you in my earlier post. I really feel for you and what you are going through. I also wish that no infection develops from all these packings. Good luck, I hope it gets better fast. {{{hugs}}}
M, oh, it must take patience to be resting, limiting your movements and activities, etc., after having been healed for so long. I'm glad the weather is cooler, you can at least go for walks. Sorry you can't enjoy the spa now, that suck$! Have fun with Dex tomorrow!
Hi gB! You never stop, good for you for having all this energy!
Fiaranch, where do you find all these crazy pictures?! You're hilarious, thanks the laughs! How's the decluttering going?
Wren, I'm sorry about your back pain, I hope you feel better tomorrow.
Hi Idesim, thanks for sharing your experience about hair and wig. My hair is falling slowly for now, no clumps yet, so I'm just enjoying what I have!
bobo, dreaming of Brian Williams, lol!! I just noticed the other thread you started, that's great, I love your attitude!
All turned out fine for me at the hospital yesterday, it was just hour long waits for everything. Coming back from a long weekend and the recent snow dump probably made every department busier. So, off to chemo tomorrow, with DH. Hopefully my nurse is as good and everything goes as smoothly as the first time. It is a tortureous process to get this, feel bad (not too bad for me last time), get better, then go through the whole thing again, time and time again! Gotta love roller coasters! Anyway only 5 more to go including tomorrow.
Good night!
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Sgc: The feeling that you have on your arm . . . could that be cording? It is quite common following surgery with lymph node removal. Seeing a physiotherapist would really help. They will get you doing stretches. I had it a bit following my surgery, but from armpit to elbow. It can run down your entire arm. Check that out if you have not already.
Ariom: I was walking my Lily (bulldog) today on a leash when our Sam (white German Shep.) got loose and decided to "play" with us. We rescued her so she has always had a few issues. She would play and then come running at us as though we were enjoying this. Poor Lily hit the ground to protect herself and then would try to bolt. Sam never actually jumped on me, but Lily damn near tore my arm out of it's socket. Sam clearly had no idea she was harming us. My armpit has the claw tonight and hope it does not complicate anything as I start the dreaded rads tomorrow. I totally understand why Dex is in the kennel!
Prb: You are doing so well! See, a mx is easier than rads. But I have had lots of encouragement from the rads group. Tonight I am getting last minute thoughts of running away from all of this. If only that were possible.
Togetherness: Sending healing thoughts your way, and to you too Wren.
Otceb: It is so hard to live with a bad hair cut, never mind lose your hair. I think it is such an undeniable confirmation of having cancer. I hate entering those doors that say "CancerCare" when I go for radiation.
I have left lots of women out, but am not good at this tonight and am not my usual upbeat self. I did bake a healthy banana bread with flax, etc. I typically do not eat sweets (but pass the salt!), but think I am about to have a great big slice right now.
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Sg, of course you do not want le, nobody wants that crap! Hope hubby realizes you need his help and support now more than ever, meds can help. Hugs to you, feel free to vent anytime, we get it here. also hope heart tests go ok, take care.
OTC, hair is important isn't it? we know it will grow back but still another thing to deal with.
togetherness, hope things are ok for you.
know what you mean by not wanting to see the cancer care sign, always hate to hit the elevator button to the onocology floor either, hits me every time that I have (hopefully had) cancer.
on another note, the Northern Lights have been magnificent lately! Canadian friends here have probably seen them, last night just a beautiful green, red, purple, tonight it is cloudy so nothing. they are just unreal! sometimes it is nice to live way up north
. Sleep we'll everyone.0 -
Maybe we all can wear the foob scarves when we are in the bag for each other. And pop out like a Greek chorus when needed. WITH the scarves at full tilt.
HollyBoo
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Ok. Full tit.
HollyBoo
I could not resist that.
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You're a character HollyBoo!
ndgirl, love that new photo!
I haven't ever seen the Northern lights, but loved a movie, years ago called Local Hero which was set in a Northern Scottish town. The Northen lights were magic!
Tb, my Dex is a rescue dog too, and he still has issues too, nothing bad just a bit crazy weird sometimes. I have organized for him to stay till Monday now, so Colin and I will go to the Music Festival this weekend without worrying about him barking at people passing. There will be lots of tourists around. It is a Festival that is held here every year, organized by friends of ours, so we will go to the outdoor performances during the day and to an indoor performance at the golf club on Saturday night and dinner. I hope I can lean back against the chair by then:)
otceb, big hugs for you, and I am in the bag for you tomorrow. It is such a shitty roller coaster!
sgc, don't you ever worry about coming here and talking about how you're feeling. We are here to listen and even if we can't actually "do" anything, we're here for you.
I agree with TB, I had cording too, and although mine was down my front, and not my arm, the feeling was very strange. I couldn't stand completely upright without it pulling and burning. It may be something to have checked out. I know you've got lots on your plate with all the tests, but if it is cording, and not LE, that' a good thing. The cording goes away! M x
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HI Ariom, it is kind of odd how that happens isn't it? LOL, I have to do what I have to do. Sometimes it is nothing, and some times it is a lot all at once!!
sgc, oh dear, so much going on all at once!! And on top of that stress at home too. (((hugs))) I wish I had some advice to give you.
otc, not always, sometimes I do run out of steam and hit the wall!
In the bog for you tomorrow!PRB, I have to echo what others have said, you sound so much better now than before the sx! It's nice to see!
Hugs!
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Kids up. In the bag. Be back later.
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Good morning Zills and the kiddies. Once again I've been gone forever, so I've skimmed post but not done an in depth reading. M, glad that your surgery went well sending a gentle healing hug. Love that you are already back into shopping mode.
Before the OG awakens and snags his tablet for movie watching I'll give a quick life update. He is still out of work, has been home for 60+days! Bored, tired of wearing his splint,but his hand looks great!
Still NO BABY, she is 3 days over due, not a happy pregnant lady. If that baby drops any lower she is going to bruise her ears with her knee caps. We have tried every old wives tale trick to bring on labor, nothing has worked. She, the Weasel, the Weasels son, and her 2 pugs spent 5 days with us last week during a snow/ice storm. Interesting to say the least. We are much closer to the hospital and thought if labor started it would be much easier for everyone. No labor, but tons of food was consumed, hundreds of loads of laundry washed, and someone was always taking 1 of the 4 dogs out, or trying to stop the dogs from chasing the cats. More fun than a 3 ring circus. : (
Missed my MO appointment due to the weather, so far I haven't rescheduled. I'm not sure if it's the F-femara, or something else, but my bones/joints hurt so badly that I wakeup crying unable to move my hands, or roll over in bed. It is beginning to really frighten me. If this child will ever make her debut then I can make it to the doctor, and hopefully stop living on pain meds.
I hear the OG making his way to the coffee pot, we will be wrestling over his tablet. I let little mommy take home my laptop so she could watch movies in bed so now I'm really without means of communication.
Know I love and miss you all and that I'm always in the bag. HUGS LOTS OF BIG GENTLE HUGS!
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Good to hear from you Gramwe, what an ordeal you are going through! Babies have their own timetable to enter this crazy world , hope it happens soon and all goes well. You had a houseful and to be feeling so shitty, wow, hate to hear you are in pain. Sometimes when the weather changes it can cause aches but yours sounds too much for that. Glad og,s hand is looking good,. if your joints are stiff you probably won't win the wretstling match for the tablet, ha ha, sending you positive hugs for some needed pain relief.
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Ariom, picture is the beach where we stayed in San Diego, I love the ocean/beach, so jealous of your paradise! Thanks.
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I think babies wait until they hear the Mom say, I'd do anything to get this baby out.
ndgirl, We're thinking of going to San Diego for a few days. DH has some problems walking and wants a short trip to see if he can keep up. I have problems walking slow after years of trying to keep up with him so I wouldn't look like an Indian wife, trailing behind my husband.
In the bag today. No word from the mammo folks, so probably nothing wrong. I think I will bring up that BC patients would really like to hear sooner, even if it's nothing. Back feels better today thank goodness. Maybe I'll be able to get something done.
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