Starting chemo July 2014
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Merry Christmas to all my July 2014 ladies. I pray 2018 only brings good things into all our lives.
Shi
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Thanks, Shirley. Merry Christmas to you all, as well!
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Merry Christmas everyone, and hope 2018 brings good things to all.
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Merry Christmas ladies! Hope you all are doing well
Nancy
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Merry Christmas to all - also. So glad we are still together as a group. I'm Facebook friends with Pink and she keeps posting silly pictures from her weekly chemo. As we all know, she is such a ham, she keeps me smiling. I'm titrating up on Nerlynx, the 'new' anti Her2+ drug. I'm currently on 3 a day (need to get up to 6). I have nausea, fatigue and diarrhea, but can manage it in the morning and go substitute teach in the afternoons. It is nice to bring in at least a little money and help to contribute to the family coffers, especially at Christmas time. I never even realized that there is such a demand, you can set your own hours practically.
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Mags, thinking of you and continuous prayers
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Has anyone heard from Mags? She hasn't posted since November. I think about her often. Hope you are all doing well.
Nancy
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Nancy,
I haven't heard anything about Mags since November. I wonder about her, too.
I'm getting ready to start Prolia for osteoporosis. It's a shot every six months, as opposed to the weekly Fosamax.
Hope you're doing OK! Still on the Tamoxifen?
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Hi Elaine,
I'm doing fine thanks for asking. I had my D & C back on 12/6. It all came back benign and nobody can tell me why I had atypical endometrial cells 😒. I saw my onc on 12/18. She suggested a complete hysterectomy 😳. Um no thank you so we settled on me switching to letrozole. I have been on that for almost 2 months now. I can't really even complain about it lol as it seems to be ok for me.
I'm assuming you'll be doing prolia due to the aromasin? I worry about that - I had a bone scan and have oeteopenia in my left hip. Hope it doesn't get worse since I'm on letrozole now. I hope the prolia goes well for you. Does it cause side effects? How often do you get bone scans? I think my onc said every 2 years? Can't remember.
I'm really worried about Mags
Nanc
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Sounds like letrozole is going OK for you so far.... According to many Prolia veterans, its side effects are minimal. I can only get bone scans every two years, per insurance. However, after talking it over with MO and GP, it seems as though having a dexascan every year wouldn't make much sense. Bone densities don't change that quickly, so if you want to see change, it's best to wait the two years.
Yeah, I'm worried about Mags, too. Maybe I will PM Beatmon, who is also from OK.
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Oh my word! Y’all know I am a survivor, right? Shirley PMed me on facebook to let me know you were worried about me. It is a long hard slog, that is for sure (as Puffin can attest!) especially when a husband of decades passes suddenly. It’s even worse when he has always managed the finances and you don’t even have a single password to any online accounts. DH was only 57, and he never wanted to think about his mortality, so he never told me where he wanted to be buried, or made a will, or any other preparations. Fortunately he worked for 23 years for an awesome company, and so apparently I will not starve. But to be honest, the last 3 months have been hellish. All of November and early December was spent cleaning up the financial mess he left and filing for social security and Medicare etc. My cousin and I decided we didn’t want to be here for the holidays, so we went to my sister’s in Michigan. IT’S COLD THERE!! And white, soooo white! I basically hunkered down in the guest room most of the time, sleeping and paying bills. We came home January 6 and picked up from there. Oh, one thing that made the trip to Michigan easier, I was able to take my sweet Rose along as an emotional support animal. She was so good! Riding on my lap on the plane and through the airports, making friends with everyone, and while we were there, sleeping at my feet.
I’m going to continue this in a new post so I don’t lose it.
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Well, I’m starting a whole new chapter in my life now, and I must confess I feel I am being carried on a stream I didn’t choose - wouldn’t have chosen - but I often say, be careful how you pray!
Oops! I gotta go, to be continued later. Stand by
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Ok I’m back. Just got off the phone with my niece, who called me in tears from NYC where she’s in college. Her dad died when she was 9, and DH was a surrogate for her all those years. He was the one who instilled a love of theater, which is her career pursuit, and she’ll graduate in May with a degree in dramatic arts. She brought him so much joy, and his death was a week after the anniversary of her dad’s death. Right now she’s feeling the loss so intensely, and by the time we were through talking we were both in tears. I will tell you the rest of the story of how he died, in time, but right now I’m trying to make sense out of what seems to lie ahead.
As I said, I feel like I’m being carried along on a stream I wouldn’t have chosen, but no matter how much I pray that God will close the doors he doesn’t want me to go through, all of them seem to open wider and wider along the way. People have come into my life at exactly the right time to make things happen, and I’m just riding the raft here, faster and faster.
I decided I needed to move. At first it was a question of the mortgage being too high, coupled with the thought that has become an obsession over the past several years, that I don’t want to die in this house. Never liked it. Wasn’t my choice.. A friend introduced me to a realtor who also goes to my church. We started looking around. I saw a picture of a house, on the internet, and couldn’t get it out of my mind. It’s only 3 miles away, but closer to our church and the cancer clinic. Finally had the realtor take me for a look. I fell in love. But no way could I afford it. And it’s bigger! Not a lot, maybe 150 sq ft, but bigger. Then my brother put me in touch with his financial planner, who’s done very well for them over many years. He gets me thinking outside the box on what DH left me, and all of a sudden it’s doable. I still don’t know how, but i’ve been put with people I trust, and here we go.
Someone reminded me that one is supposed to wait at least 6 months after a loss to make any major moves. But DH left me long ago. And by the time this happens it actually will be close to 6 months. My sister thinks I’m crazy, but she seems to be the only one. Everyone else says “Go! Be happy!” Also, my cousin, who will go with me, is in love with it too. So we shall see.
How am i doing? Who the heck knows!!
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((((((((((Mags))))))))) so happy to hear from you. I hadn't seen you post since November and I got really worried about you. Sounds like you have a lot on your plate but are doing ok. The house sounds exciting!!! It would be a fresh start which you so deserve. Please keep us posted. And please keep checking in. We worry! Lol
Hugs
Nancy
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Mags - do I understand correctly that you and your cousin will be roomies in your new house? How wonderful, going back to that time when it is just us girls. I think the move sounds wonderful. I hope those extra 150 sq ft are flat and easy to maintain. I'm thinking stairs are such a pain to vacuum but a big open room is a breeze. Your situation sounds like my mother's college roommate's. My mother flew down and stayed for about a month to help go through all the financials. I also realize that although my husband and I both know most of each others passwords, the office is a mess and it would still be tricky to figure out what is going on. As to funeral plans, I'm not sure what I'd want... so I'm not sure I could tell him. Ultimately, I'd like it at my home parish, but that is 55 miles away and I haven't been back since my father died. As to him, he wants a keg with a tap at the kneeler for his casket at the funeral home and a Kiss casket. Does he really? Is that even legal, who knows? Thinking about you and hoping you can enjoy the ride down that stream every so often.
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Mags!
I'm so happy to hear from you and that you were just super-busy. Reading your posts, I have decided to make DH write down all of his passwords to our financial accounts and to put that list where I can find it. I'm glad to hear that things are settling down and that you've found a new home you like. Happy moving!
I've been doing OK; I will be shifting from Fosamax to Prolia soon for my Aromasin-induced osteoporosis.
Again, super happy to hear from you!
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Oh yes, Mags, I know exactly what you're talking about. It took me months to sort through all Lew's finances,hate to think how many hours I spent maneuvering through phone trees and sitting on hold. It also made me think what the family would need to know when I die. Lew's kids wouldn't know anything about writing my obit. I've written my obit and arranged my funeral. Besides preparing a passwords list, I also put together a list of all my financial accounts, what payments I make, what automatically payments are set up, changed any of the beneficiaries for the accounts where Lew had been the beneficiary. I put all of it in a packet and gave copies to family, my executor and the bank who will be in charge of my estate if my executor can't. I even wrote my Dad's obit and sent a copy to his chosen funeral home to put in his file in case I die before he does since I'm the only close family he has left.
I can tell you that everything eventually does quiet down and life gets back to a new normal.
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So, I wanted to show y’all a picture of the house I want to buy. Take a look:
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I love ❤️ it
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Mags,
What a lovely house! I can see why you find it so appealing.
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Mags the house is beautiful - go for it
Nancy
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I put in an offer on the house yesterday, expecting a counter offer tomorrow. Fingers crossed.
(Actually, I’m ok if I don’t get this house, because if that’s not where God wants me, I’ll be as miserable as I am in this place. So no worries.)
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Well I hope you get it!!!!! I really think a fresh start would be good for you. So I am keeping my fingers crossed for you. It's a beautiful house. Let us know what happens tomorrow or is that today now lol?
Nancy
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Mags send us a link to the MRIS listing. I'm dying to see what it looks like inside. I love it. Is it old or new build meant to look old? I love the cross above the window in the middle dormer, Looks like it should be a rectory. I sure hope you get it and am thankful you have included us as part of your journey.
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I'm not familiar with MRIS, but here's a link to a slide show. Depending upon what part of the country (or world!) you're in, it may be outrageously expensive or equally cheap. Never ceases to amaze me. In any case, I know it will be a stretch for me, it's both more sq ft and more $ than this one, but I feel so strongly drawn to it I had to try, and all the signs are a go.
My dream houseOne not so good thing is I will see little if any profit on the current abode. The amount of work required to pull it up to pass inspection will quickly eat that up. Unfortunately since my dx, DH had become very lax in making all but emergency repairs, and realtor insists that unless I'm selling to an investor, the place requires major updates. I'm not sure I agree with her, but at this point I want out so badly I hope I don't do anything stupid. Oh well.
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Wow - I didn't think about the fact I was asking you to post something that would have the price on it, sorry for being so intrusive... and yes, depending upon what part of the country you are in... you would never see a palace like that in the DC area for under a million. How absolutely DIVINE!!! All those built ins. That backyard looks like a park. Please tell me it is a park, as that looks like a lot of yard work. BTW - what is the material for most of the floors? Sure hope you get it (but only if it is what God has in store for you). As to selling and what is necessary, always good to ask more than one realtor. In my HOA, first ones on the market in late winter are what sells ASAP, then the others, either fabulously upgraded or the norm, sit for a bit. Heck, some for a while. Wish I had the time, I'd fly out and help you get your home set up. We found, getting a storage unit and putting half our stuff in it was a good idea. Makes your closets looks so much bigger, when they don't have all your clothes in them same with kitchen cabinets and counters. Bad thing is that then you have, in essence, two batches of things to unpack. I wonder if there is an organization that helps those dealing with breast cancer to do fixes to their homes. If so, let me know, my husband isn't even doing the emergency repairs. Also, if you are thinking about all new appliances, or new granite counter tops, when my neighbor did that, she shopped around. There was a HUGE difference in costs. Granite was actually cheaper at a granite place than Home Depot and I think she got her 'matching stainless' appliances at a big box store, but since she was purchasing the complete package it was at a great reduction.
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Wow what a beautiful house. I'm sure it would cost over a million here in San Diego. It's huge. Still keeping fingers crossed you get it.
Nancy
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Hi ladies, it’s been a rough day. Between being hormonal and stressed, I just melted down. Actually took some Valium finally and i’m better. But it’s been up and down all day.
Sellers countered higher than I hoped, and I went back and forth all day over what to do. Lender gave me a fresh prequal at an even lower %, financial planner said go, finally cousin and I sat here and prayed. When we were done she said she got a strong message that I should actually write the buyers and tell them why this house is important to me. Realtor had told them about being widowed recently (ack that sounds so strange to me still) but not about the cancer. So i sat down and wrote to them. Sent to realtor. She said beautiful. Sent with our counter. Waiting to hear. They have until 5 tomorrow.
Now i’m exhausted, nauseous, and cold. I just want a nap.
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By the way, this is what I wrote:
To the Sellers,
Thank you for considering this counter offer. I want to tell you a little about myself. My realtor has mentioned that she told your realtor that I am recently widowed. My husband passed away November 1 of last year. We had been married for 30 years and 3 months to the day. What she hesitated to mention, and left to me to tell you, is that his loss came not long after my doctors found that I am in remission from the metastatic breast cancer I have been fighting for the past 4 years. Of course this doesn't mean that I am cured, only that the cancer isn't progressing right now, and that I must continue to fight, right now by the oral chemo I take at home.
When I first talked to Terri (my realtor), I really didn't know what I wanted to do, except that I didn't want to stay in this house that has held so much sorrow for me. Then I saw your house and was instantly drawn to it. The moment I walked in I told her that it spoke to me. Since that day I have prayed constantly that if this house was where God wants me that he would open every door, and so far that has been the case. And I've prayed that if that isn't where he wants me that he would close the doors, and he has not. You see, I believe that God is passionate about real estate! Acts 17:26 tells us that
"From one man he made all the people of the world. Now they live all over the earth. He decided exactly when they should live. And he decided exactly where they should live." (NIrV)
It's been my wish that I would find a place to leave sorrow behind and spend my last days, however long God chooses to grant me, in a place of joy. I have felt that in that house. My cousin, who at a vigorous 81 is my caregiver, will be provided for after I'm gone by the trust I have set up for that purpose.
I pray you will accept this offer, and if that's not possible, that we can come to some mutually agreeable terms. I just wanted you to know a little about me and why this house has captivated me so. Thank you for considering this.
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hello ladies! I know I haven’t been on here much lately but I just wanted to post a quick update. I’ve been doing weekly chemo for the last year and today made number 50! It’s been such a long year, I’m so anemic and fatigue beyond.
Anyways I had my scan on Monday and got the results this morning. All my tumors are stable or have disappeared so my oncologist totally surprised me and is taking me off chemo. No more chemo! I was so shocked that I am just absolutely speechless. So the plan is I’ll still do Herceptin and perjeta every three weeks since I’m her 2 positive and I’ll have scans every three months to keep an eye on the tumors.
I asked how long till the tumors would come back and she said hopefully best case scenario is I’ll get two years and then have to go on a different chemo. For now I’m going to live it up and enjoy life and I’m just still so shocked.
Now I’ll spend the next several months just getting my health back, getting my blood levels up and just getting rest.
Glad to see Mag is doing well and everyone else. Miss you guys .
I’m on Facebook if anybody wants to follow me, Rachel Hatanaka Bowers
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