STEAM ROOM FOR ANGER
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Ladies and Gents I need to know WHY when you hire people to do a job and you warn them multiple times that they are performing below standard and putting the company at risk that they lose their minds and blame YOU and others when you hold them accountable. Holy crap am I disappointed. I don't need all this BS. Do your job!!! We get paid exceptionally well where here and still every no and then someone has to go off side. OY VAY! That's all. Funny my rant is not related to BC. Yay me!0 -
re: "that's not a bad idea.
I think I am actually going to try that "please help me" approach with my doctor, and see if she can get a move on for my pathology results."I tried today to reach my doctor. My doctor's not in. There is a Civic holiday in Canada on Monday so offices will start closing on Friday August 3 and not be open on Monday August 6.
Bear in mind there is NO REASON for this holiday, there is no occasion or event it is marking; it's just a holiday to have a holiday. Just another free day for government workers, who I guess felt that summer dragged without at least a few paid long weekends. That's the reason no work ever gets done effectively in Canada and the whole country is bogged down in a sloggy bureaucratic mess- everyone is always on some freakin' paid holiday.
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Absolutely clean floors only. But it works! I've gotten visibly upset and loud And professionals don't Ike that, they want to seem like the Hero. Running to your rescue!! Good luck and get those results ! ~M~
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I love your attitude Micmel
And I really am going to take your advice. cheers,
Amica
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No work gets done in congress either with this administration. I'd take Canada if I could. Not just healthcare issues but the US needs to be made great again domestically and abroad. We are going backwards and it's just ugly to see.
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I love all of Canada's statutory holidays! The reason for stat holidays is to give workers a break & I especially love the August long because it's purely for fun and unadulterated by religion or colonialism. Labour Day is my favourite holiday though - celebrating the rights of the worker. I try to remember to sing The Internationale that day (Billy Bragg's version).
My rant is about a neighbour who put in new turf, failed to water it, had large chunks of it die because he didn't get the proper sprinkling permit from the municipality and now is freaking out at me when I walk by with my dogs because he's SURE it's the dogs that have killed it. Even though they don't pee on his lawn (they pee in my yard, before leaving for a walk) and I *always* pick up my dogs' poops. I was so gobsmacked when he started up his bitching that I just walked away & my very calm and diplomatic husband chatted with him politely but now I feel like marching over there & yelling 'Are you seriously going to whine about your freaking lawn to someone who has been fighting cancer since last December? Do you really think I give a rats ass about your lawn????' oh & yeah, unless he's a bigger idiot that I can imagine, he should darn well know I'm dealing with cancer because I am bald & don't wear head covers except in the sun & pretty much everyone in my neighbourhood knows I'm doing chemo because I've told lots of people. I was literally standing there bald, no eyebrows, no eyelashes in front of him as he was ranting at us.
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I don't think there should be holidays for important medical services, no matter what country. I worked at a cancer hospital and I worked many a Christmas, many a New Years, many holiday weekends when everyone else was out partying, and I didn't even work in patient care, but DNA-based services for transplant. What's the big deal? They are JUST DAYS. There should be no holidays for provision of vital medical services. The idea that my life-and-death pathology results are further going to be delayed so over-paid workers can take another day off pisses me off. That's my rant.
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How about this: My step dad died on July 11th, his brother came down from Alberta in May or June to spend time with him and help take care of him. So he has left for home and we can get into my mom and step dads house - the a$$holes stole a bunch of stuff! They even tried to steal the brand new lawn mower, but the neighbour caught them. How could they do that to their brother and his wife? They opened a brand new train set, took out what they wanted from it and left the near empty box. WTF is wrong with people. I am so upset about this, they went through their private things taking whatever suited their fancy. OMG!!!!
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So very sorry, Vamp. No one can disappoint us like family. You (& your mother) should not have to deal with something like this, especially while you're still grieving. But anyone who is capable of doing such a thing lacks the ability to feel shame so don't expect them to feel any guilt. They've shown you who they are. Now believe them & put them where they belong - in your past. I don't mean that you should ever forgive or forget this. Maybe you want to file a police report & have the local authorities contact them with a few questions. That should send them a message!
Sending you warm hugs -
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Thanks JKL - my brother is so mad he's looking into legal stuff. I don't care about the stuff so much, it's that they just helped themselves. My mom lets them stay there and they do thisi n return. Like my brother said Karma will get them!
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Oh Vampeyes I’m so sorry. Unfortunately it’s more common than anyone thinks. Their response will just be that Dad said he wanted us to have it. It’s a no win. Liveand learn is the best we can do.
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Oh Vampeyes! That is so awful. That is is beyond the pale It will come back and bite them in the a**. Karma's a b*ch. They will have to live with this on their conscience for the rest of their lives.
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Muddling Through - I was thinking yesterday about the spam (I get tons, pretty sure it's from one of the Keto sites I joined), anyway sometimes other peoples email accounts get hacked and that is how these spammers get your email address as well. For now move them to junk and block when you delete them, it will help lessen the amount you get.
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Just venting....Saw my rad doc yesterday so he could "check how my skin was holding up". He asked if I had fatigue, I said yes. He said Ok. I told him I was achy in the breast they were treating, he said, What?" I said I'm achy, he said Huh? I said I'm hurting. He said, It will stop don't worry about it! My RO has the personality of a piece of cardboard. I don't even like talking to him. Have to see him every Tuesday. I asked questions once and was blown off and made to sound like I was melodramatic so I'm not going to bother anymore. Feeling like the next rat in the maze.
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Sorry that’s happening to you. I think one reason I get second opinions before choosing a doctor is to rule out the “cardboard” docs. I know that may not be a good indicator of their skill but I need to have my questions answered. On the other hand, I think I probably chose the wrong plastic surgeon because she made me feel good even though I had some reservations. It’s too bad that when we are under the pressure of getting rid of cancer we don’t have the time to think clearly. I was fleeing a university cancer-mill where I was quite definitely a rat in a maze. I often think I should have just surrendered, put a bag over my head to eliminate my need for human contact, and continued there.
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I feel very ashamed for saying this, but my DH is driving me insane. He has been disabled with heart and lung disease for about 12 years and his health gets worse every year. Up until this year his symptoms were primarily physical--shortness of breath, considerable fatigue, low stamina. Things began to change last fall, as far as I can tell. He began to slip mentally. By Feb 2018 he was having speech, memory, concentration, and balance issues. CT scan revealed a silent stroke sometime since the last CT in June 2017. We have no idea when it happened. There is also something going on in the pons, which is near the brainstem, but is not affecting the brainstem. His doctor thinks he has sarcoidosis in that area, because DH already has it in his lungs, heart, and another area of the brain. So, now DH is on 30mg prednisone, in addition to the 23 other meds he takes (you think I'm exaggerating? I'm not).It's not helping. DH has had 4 serious falls since May. One results in 8 stitches. His cognitive impairment is evident to strangers. The doctor says it's not dementia. But DH will ask the same questions several times a day and doesn't realize he has already asked before. He has set up several reminders on his phone to remind him of appointments, but he often forgets them. He gets lost driving--eventually he figures it out, but I cannot trust him to drive to his doctor, the hospital, of the library. We live in a tiny town, so this isn't rocket science. The two things he does manage to remember are paying the bills and taking care of the car. Thank goodness for that. But he is having great difficulty recognizing words, so he asks me multiple times a day to spell the most random things. It's wearing me down.
So here's the thing. I feel cheated. I could deal with the physical side of his illness. He's been sick a long time and we've always done just fine. But I feel betrayed by his cognitive impairment. I am really tired of being his mother. I have to verbally remind him of things several times. I leave post-it notes on the bathroom mirror. I set up a calendar on the fridge with all the appointments. He still forgets. He has nearly missed several appts. At this point, I go with him everywhere. Every. Where. And he goes with me EVERY. FREAKING. WHERE. I cannot have him cook anymore, because he loses track of what he's doing. I don't allow him to drive much, unless I'm in the car. I feel like I don't get a moment to myself. We have friends. We both have things to do. But he chooses me. And then I feel guilty for feeling so badly toward him.
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Awe Poodles I am so very sorry you are going through this. It sounds like Alzheimer's to me, couldn't be all the meds could it? Any chance of getting help around the house or someone to drive him to appointments? HUGS hun, you need a vackay.
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poodles~ I am so sorry for your situation. I think he always wants to be with you, because you are his person. He knows your soul, you're his protection source. It sounds like you need a planned spa day or a day just for you. No matter what, you do for you as well. When you Come back, from the spa day bring him his favorite candy bar or his favorite treat. Show him it's not so bad... you'll come back. Also... for you. In case you haven't heard of a service called “cleaning for a reason “. They offer up to three free cleanings of your home for no charge, for any woman who is suffering from breast cancer and the treatments. Look into it, give yourself at least a break from the dreaded cleaning at least. I will keep you in my thoughts ! Much love ~M~
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my aunt's husband has Alzheimer's. She feels the same way, like his mother. He is aware of his issues but can't help it. He's scared and frustrated and sad that he's losing his cognitive abilities on top of physical stuff. At some point she'll have to put him in assisted living. Insurance doesn't pay for it and he's not that far gone yet so she holds off.
Can family give you breaks like couple hours here and there? Helps her because he is stuck to her like a lifeline.
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(((HUGS))) Poodles
Could you ask his doctor(s) if DH needs all 23 medications? I realize that he has a lot of medical conditions. However, that's so many medications there's a big possibility of drug interactions and side effects. Despite his stroke and other physical effects, some of the medications may be exacerbating his cognitive issues.
Also, there are some medications that may help improve his cognitive functioning.
Best wishes to both of you.
Mominator / Madelyn
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Great idea from Mominator, in fact I have heard that some pharmacists will go over the collection of meds to see if any conflict. Are they from more than one doctor? Could be that one doesn’t know what the other is doing. Too many cooks may be spoiling the broth... I'm so sorry you're in this situation.
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I'm pretty sure DHs meds are a factor. Unfortunately, he needs them all. Thankfully, housework is at a minimum--we live in our RV up in the mountains. Its just beautiful up here and that helps us both.
I do think that he sees me as his person, much like my little curly dog. I imagine i represent his past and his future. We've been best friends for 42 years. The only person who has known and loved him longer is his sister. I never really thought about it that way.
His neurologist says this is not Alzheimer's or another dementia. More likely these symptoms are related to the stroke he had, and neurosarcoid. I am trying to be understanding--i know he's not trying to be aggravating, but there are days i just want to scream. I just want things to be normal, like it was before sarcoid, before cancer, before heart disease took so much away from us.
Foo! I think I'll have to take you up on your idea for spa day. Maybe a massage and a pedicure would work som magic for me.
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My little curly dog, Tiki-bird.
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hugs for everyone I hope !! Precious lil puppers. So pretty white! Just take one day at a time and arrange that spa day! Or make a dinner just for him and tell Him that. He needs reassurance and comfort from the only person he probably trusts. YOU. I know that my DH is my care taker. I honor the ground he walks on. I adore him more than words can express. But I do realize that at times. He needs to have something for himself. You being the caretaker must do things for yourself. But always bring him a trinket of sort. To kinda make new memories. It will show him you're thinking of him also.... and that you're going out to do things alone, isn't so bad after all. He may even want you to do more things, if he wonders hmmmm wonder what she'll bring this time. Maybe silly things, candy rings. Candy bracelets. Funny things. Change his way of looking at you briefly stepping out for errands or a hair day. Slowly, he may become more comfortable as you go on. I'm sending hugs across the miles. ~M~
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Tiki-bird is a doll! so cute. Cheered me up to just to see his big black eyes and his expression
I feel for you mustlovepoodles Your situation sounds really trying, and there are no easy solutions. I don't know what to say, except I'm sorry you have to deal with so much.
Amica
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Thank you all for your kindness. My hubby loves this little dog. Tiki was a badly abused rescue. We've had him 5 years, but he's probably about10 now. He's the only dog my DH has ever allowed in our bed, LOL. If something happened to Tiki, it would destroy my husband.
Micmrl, i like your ideas. Today i disappeared to the library for about 2 hours. I brought hin some donuts and it just about made his day. Then i fixed him some ham, potato salad, corn, and green beans for dinner. Its been raining here all day, so it was nice to throw the door open and get a fresh breeze in here. Did us both some good
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that's awesome! I believe if you can just change his way of thinking about you going out. He may be more accepting each time when he thinks about it, you always show him you always return! I hope it continues! 🌷~M~
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Cute little doggy.
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I hope this is the right place to post this, I need to get it out somewhere.
I've been off work for the past four weeks after a crainiotmy for a brain met and have just started chemo today. I was meant to go back to work this week but at the last minute they advised me I need a medical clearance, which I completely understand.... But getting this clearance is so bloody frustrating. Every nurse/doctor I talk to about getting a clearance looks at me like I have two heads. Asking why I would want to work during chemo.
I have no side effects from my surgery and they keep stating side effects that I might get from chemo. How can you deny someone the ability to go back to work based on a side effect that might happen.
My regular oncologist is on holidays and every other doctor refers it to someone else to deal with.
I feel like because I'm metastatic they think I should just stay home till I die. Like I am unable to contribute meaningfully anymore. I wish they would consider the mental health effects as well.
Rant over, thank you for reading and sorry for the long post.
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Allybee- some chemo can be brutal. See how today goes. Once you’re written back to work it can be hard to write you back out. These 2 reasons are likely why they're looking at you crazy. On the employer side, often they’d prefer you stay out than come back and have to go right back out again unexpectedly a second it messes up their workload/projections. Or have to take a bunch of sporadic sick days putting them in a bind.Just depends on what you do for a living.
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