STEAM ROOM FOR ANGER
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runor, dig through the old meds - I save them for emergencies too - but please pass on the stuff the vet left!
I'm in the circle.
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I am so sorry to hear this Runor and I wish you a benign biopsy. I went through my records and saw that my uterus scan showed 1.7cm thickness and the biopsy was negative. This was before I was diagnosed with BC. Another scare was after I was diagnosed with BC when I asked to have my ovaries removed, doctor did the biopsy while I was under anesthesia that came back benign. I regret I didn't ask for a hysterectomy when I had ovaries removed and get over with this problem. I am letting you know about my experience and I am sure many others have similar experiences. Please have the biopsy done but I have learned the thickness of the uterus with heavy bleeding doesn't always mean cancer. I wonderful doctor explained to me how the uterus gets this thick layer when estrogen fluctuates and then starts shedding (bleeding). Big hug and wishing you good news.
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Big hugs and sorry you are going through this.
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Runor - sending hugs, sorry you are going through this.
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runor I have a silly question--when I say your screen name in my head, I say ROO nore. Is that how you say it?
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Edj - that's how I say it. Roo Nor. But without the space in the middle.. Roonor , Runor.
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Oh the space was merely to illustrate I emphasize the first syllable.
I've always liked your name b/c it reminds me of Roo in Winnie the Pooh.
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Haha - glad to know I've been pronouncing "runor" correctly! There's another poster, "CeliaC". I keep wanting to say "celiac" - like the gluten intolerance condition. My apologies, CeliaC! Feel free to call me anything you like! I probably deserve it!
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Looks like I've been pronouncing runor correctly too.
Sunshine, I prefer to be called by my correct screenname, but it seems that no matter how clear I try to make my name, I still end up with Bessie rather than Beesie. My icon includes a big picture of a bee..."Bee"sie.
I have nothing against the name Bessie except that I conjure up the image of a cow, and that just doesn't work for me.
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Well, I didn’t, and stand corrected. I said it RUNor. As one who runs. Beesie comes out right, but just noticed spell check tried to fix it. Most call me spooks. That’s ok. Call me anything but late for dinner.
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I had always imagined runor like rumour, sounds like I was close... it’s neat the way we see and interpret things in the world. Been following along thinking good thoughts for all. Happy Easter. Xoxox
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runor, if you're lurking please know I'm thinking of you and still virtually in your pocket.
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Thanks Edj, I am lurking. Clunking. Dragging. Cringing. Wow, I cannot believe the physical manifestations of this anxiety and dread. It has made my feet leaden, my heart race, my face slack, my eyes dull. Every step leaves me breathless and exhausted. Hmm...maybe I should have my ticker checked out? I might have had a stroke and not know it!
I had a phone meeting with the gyno/surgeon and as much as I tried to avoid any kind of biopsy and go straight to hysterectomy she said no. She said that my cancer must be staged. If it is stage 1 she is able to do the hysterectomy. But if it's a stage 2 or higher, then I will need to see a specialist for that surgery. She said it would not be ethical medicine to just yank out my uterus and I said I'm perfectly comfortable with unethical medicine if it will get this thing gone. I am going to be having (much to my horror) and hysteroscopy and D&C which she said will give the most tissue for pathology. No stone will be unturned. This scope and D&C should happen next week and then she'll put a rush on the results and I'll have them in 2 weeks. Two weeks is a rush. Save me. The only good thing in this is that my research into this hysteroscopy says that it is a procedure that many women find horrendously painful. I am not a fan of pain. But since I will be knocked out for the D&C they will do the scope while I am out. I'm good with that. So that's where it stands for now. Thank you Edj and everyone who has been so tolerant of my howling self.0 -
Runor, hanging in your pocket as you proceed with all of this. Sending hugs and an extra large handkerchief for wiping tears, screaming into, or whatever it might be useful for.
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Hi runor, I had to have a D&C with hysteroscopy and it wasn't bad at all. What hurt was when my Gyn tried to do a biopsy in the office and wasn't able to get enough tissue. For about 2-weeks after you won't be able to vacuum or lift anything 10lbs or over. My daughter bought me this from Esty: theferriswheels Abdomen Heat Pad Cramps, PCOS Polycystic ovary syndrome, Hysterectomy Gift after Surgery. I found the weight of it very soothing and used it after my hysterectomy. The D&C will result in a plan or plans of how to proceed. Treatment before or after your hysterectomy and what type of surgery you will need. The unknown is too scary. Thinking of you.
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Howl away, dear friend. If not here, where would you go who would get what you're going through?
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Glad to hear things are moving anyway. Best wishes to you runor for the procedures next week.
I had a visit with my primary yesterday (NP). I thanked her and told her I feel so much better taking the Prozac. She said I looked well. It has been a long, long time since I have heard anyone say that to me. So with all that's happening, don't be afraid to ask for help if need be. I have a mammo next week and my appointment anxiety has kicked in gear but at a much lesser degree than before.
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Landlord's witch girlfriend called me yesterday. Paid my rent with a note saying that I did not receive a water bill. I'm not sending in extra money when I don't know what I owe, right? She said yesterday she was making a deposit and didn't leave the amount I owe on the message. Sooooo, just got another message from her, this time she gives me the amount. How dumb are you? Then, to further show her dumbness and feel better about herself she has to talk to me like I'm a 2nd rate citizen reminding me that if the rent and water aren't paid by the 5th that there is a $50. late fee. No kidding! Jesus, to end the message with even MORE dumbness she admits that no one received their water bills this month. That's their problem not mine, don't try and make it mine, you dumb witch!! Thank you/rant over
I should deduct the cost of the fricking stamp!
OK, now rant is over. LOL Some people are just dumb and don't know it. They think they're better than you. Yup not this one. God she is horrid
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Check is in the mail witch!!!
My dead husband had a bill come today. It’s from oct 31-2019 for a $60 co pay. Are you f’ng kidding me? Don’t make me go in his claims folder and look. Don’t make me do it! I almost tossed it in the trash. And where the hell is my tax refund and stimulus checks? The mail is definitely broke. At Easter I went to the grave and the stone now has our names on the correct side. I sent off that check last week. When it goes through my balance will be Ahhhhhhhhhh til next pay. Mundane and principals. Sets me off at times. Thank God for Prozac!
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ctmbsikia
Good grief. When I get a bill that late, I figure I have just as long to pay it as they took to bill me. You should get double time for them adding distress to you.
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Here's another trigger. Email from provider-"Prepare for your upcoming appt" UM, it's on the 15th, today is the 9th! Could they have waited until Monday to hit send? I don't want to think about it, especially over a weekend, but there it sits in my inbox. NOT going to click on it! Ha! I thought I'm just supposed to show up!!??
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What you to prepare for? Just plan to be there on time? I know DH gets notices from VA about 5 times for every single appointments. Post cards come with notices on appointments, letters with information in them, text messages, and several phone calls!! For ONE appointment! We are not that senile we cannot remember them!
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I read recently that almost 20% of medical appts are no-shows. I think that's where the endless reminders come in...
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I received a text from a cardiology group a few days ago asking to verify my phone number to opt into their patient contact system. What with doctors moving around and all, I googled my cardiologist to verify they never were and are not now a member of this group. Twelve years ago, I consulted a doctor in this group. Nipping this one in the bud!!!!
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Some of my drs are real pests with reminders, others don’t even send one reminder. The dogs groomer starts 2 weeks before their appointment. I have grumbled, I think it’s their particular software setup.
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My mother quit using a dog groomer who kept bugging her all the time with reminders. She told them a few times she would call when she needed to take her dog in. She is 83 and gets annoyed by those calls. After 2 times she changed groomers.
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runor - you mentioned being out of breath. I went through that very recently. During that time it seemed like I was having frequent BMs (no diarhea), and very yellow urine. I thought the breathing was from getting more and more out of shape. I mentioned this to the PA at a visit, and she said she noticed my breathing seemed labored and sent me in for an angio-thorax CT. Turns out I had pleural effusion. I was sent to the ER, they removed 1 1/2 liters from the lining around the lungs. No explanation for the frequent BMs or very yellow urine. Fluid has not returned (3 weeks ago), urine looks more normal, but BMs........
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Ii was just diagnosed T1N1 stage 2A on April 2nd. I've always been the type to over prepare for things, so I'm constantly thinking of every possibility. I've been brining up these possibilities for the past two weeks to my husband, since he's the main support that I have in the house.
People have told me throughout my life that I'm pretty, but I have never been vain or focused on that at all. I was a tomboy as a kid. My only makeup is lipstick close to the color of my lips. I was trying to be positive and said something about just going for it and have a bilateral, be done with it and maybe even come out with nice ones. Finally for the first time in my life I allowed myself to be vain and I was also feeling some sense of loss of my femininity.
My husband said something to the effect of, why are you even thinking about that? I got upset and said why do you keep telling me what I should be thinking and doing? Every time I bring up treatment regimens or how we will handle the daily he says I'm being negative. I'm tired of thinking about his feelings. I'm literally trying to fight for my life, thinking about our four kids and him, and all he says is why are you even thinking about that? He says why don't I think about them (our kids), today. I'm like have you EVER been in my shoes? Every breath of my life has been doing everything for them. I was trying to find some kind of silver lining or light at the end of the tunnel. Actually it would be in the middle. I don't even care about freaking boobs. I have small ones to begin with. I WAS trying to take my mind off of chemo and whatever else I'm going to need to do. Finally he says "FK YOU". Seriously? Why do I have to deal with his mental health too? I've done it all our married lives together - over twenty years since high school. He finishes the rest of his rant with, I've been trying to find out what to make you and how to deal with the kids and how to deal with money. He literally doesn't even see that I'm trying to survive here. As if I'm just sitting here pining for new boobs. NO jerk, I've been waking up trying to find the latest research on what I have so I can make sure my oncologist takes the best approach. I'm looking up how to balance work and elementary kids while on chemo. I'm contacting the insurance companies. I just wanted to think of something else other than everybody else and of course other than dying. I'm wondering if he even empathizes with me and he's not just angry because he'll lose me. It's like he's only thinking of how he'll feel. I'm tired of taking care of everyone else. I want to be selfish. I really do.
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Bluegirlred - I also have very yellow pee. But I know I should be drinking more water. I have been too stressed out lately to eat or drink much of anything. I'm even off coffee - which must mean I am near death!
As for breathlessness, I was just bitching at myself about that yesterday. I was shovelling debris out of the chicken pen. Load the wheelbarrow, rocks, dirt, sticks, and lug it over to the dump pile. Repeat this 5 times. Our land is mountainside so none of these trips are on flat ground. All of them are an uphill trip in one direction. Then I had to fill in chicken holes, so that was digging soil and tossing, digging tossing, digging tossing. This took about 40 minutes. Then the last trip was back up to the house with wheelbarrow and shovel and rakes and shitfork. Half way to the house I had to stop and bend over and catch my breath. But the incline is probably the equivalent of about 10 flights of stairs, up, pushing a wheelbarrow. No wonder I"m out of breath! Everything I do around here is a serious workout. Nothing is easy. But I am certainly out of shape.
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