CRAZY TOWN WAITING ROOM - TESTS coming up? All Stages Welcome.
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Lucy, That is awful that you misplaced your purse. It's no wonder you're depressed. All that work to recover everything. I hope it turns up so you can have some peace of mind!! My mom was Catholic and she used to say this prayer to St. Anthony. It worked every time. I'm not a practicing Catholic, but I do say the prayer when I'm desperate. It's crazy how well it works.
Cubbie, Hugs to you. I know how terrifying it can be to find lumps and bumps. I've had a swollen neck and face since stopping chemo with no answers. I'm starting to wonder if we are just more prone to things swelling after treatment. It seems like so many of us are finding swollen lymph nodes and nodules. Please mention it to your MO so you can have peace of mind. Hopefully they will poke and prod and send you on your way like they did to me.
In the meantime, we are all right here by your side.Queen, Enjoy your opera! I've never been to the opera and would love to go someday. Safe travels to you!!
Eggroll, Katy may be able to interpret your dream! She's really good at that.
April, Be prepared to gain a lot of pounds hanging out in Crazy Town!! haha
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Thank you Slow Sula I will send a better proportion for the whole thing this weekend. Thanks for the keeping me posted about Evelyn. I am Trusting..breathing
I love how many here are in to music and classic especially and even more opera
Life living and breathing are what matter- no matter where we are in our "diagnosis" ( and please don't get caught in that web) or in treatment or in post anything.
I'll settle down soon ( maybe)- the quash on my 'dance' has really pissed me off
and has been stated here before- 'do not piss off a petite Italian woman'
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Thanks for the hugs, Lucy. I really needed it tonight.
Sula, I'm laughing through my tears about being a "bonehead". Send some of that cake through the tubes!
Slow, thank you for being here and starting this thread. I don't know what I would do without you guys. I am trying to pull it together and remember that I have six (I counted them in the mirror at the YMCA) zits on my chin and jawline. Maybe that is the source of the swelling. I definitely need to get the complexion under control. I haven't been good about using my topicals.
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hahaha Gaia. Aint that the truth??? My Italian grandmother dumped a bowl of spaghetti over my grandfathers head once. Some say it was into his lap. We never really got the location straight but either location is just as crazy!!
I often put on my music very loud and dance like a maniac. I typically pay for it for weeks to come, but at the time it feels really good. I think we should send some coal to the grouchy ass neighbor. Maybe Sula can put one of her crazy chipmunks or whatever she used to post on their porch, ring the bell and run!! Remember ding, dong, ditch em??? What's wrong with people anyway?? They should lighten up for goodness sake.
Sula! Great picture!! I'm curious if you cook 24 hrs. a day??? When my DD was young she used to sleep walk and cook in her play kitchen. It was REALLY freaky. Not sure why that makes me think of you. Do you sleep cook??? haha
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Cubbie, You will get through this. It's such an adjustment living with this stuff. Tomboy and I used to burn up the text waves with our different ailments and lumps and bumps. I've noticed we've both calmed down a bit. I appreciate the thanks, but I've always said that without Tomboy, I probably would have been too scared to start this thread. She really did encourage me to share my crazy here on BCO. She's a fine, smart woman that Tomboy!!!
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Ha Slow- and All my Ladies here
picture this
My beloved - Seth got the text-while he was at work. The text was from our very next door neighbor. A TXT no knocking on the dorr to say something.
Anyway Seth then, from his very busy moment says "hey babe ' (douche bag sorry- he did not say that I am) says music is too loud.
Have I said it was 8:30. There are no children near. and that I am livid. still sorry
any way I decide that neighbor should understand that if he has an issue he should knock. So i knock on his door and request that if he has a concern he should actually face me/us not send a passive agressive email
said it face to face
ok
OY
I'll be back to "normal crazy'soon
Tom katy sula slow cubbie duckie eggroll april momriter PTS QMC ducky chevy Chi- everyone of you xx
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A big thanks to Tomboy, too!
On a related note, why is it that everywhere I go, the doctor's offices ask about your anxiety and distress, but they never do anything with that information? Are they just collecting it for research? I've had this happen three times now, in different offices each time. Nobody ever says "Cubbie, you reported difficulty sleeping, anxiety, sadness, and rated your overall distress a 9 of 10. Let's talk about what resources we can use to address that." Even at the university, where they actually have a psychologist who specializes in cancer patients. I know about him only because I asked myself about what services might be available, at the end of my last appointment.
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Lucy- I am so very sorry you and your purse became separated. I'm not going to say you lost it. It might have been stolen. Either way, how frustrating and what a hassle to have to call the card companies and replace ID. You have my sympathies and support.
Cubby- (((Cubby))) I'm so sorry you are in Crazytown. Are you going to call the doctor or wait a couple of days? I know with me and I see or feel something and then try to remember when it really started. I have a hard time. I should start a diary for my daily moods and aches and pains. It would be a modern tragedy and maybe Queen and Chi and Rainny could make a CT production company and dramatize my drama!!! I have this rib pain that started months ago, I'm going to discuss it with my MO tomorrow. I know chances are very slim it is a progression or recurrence, but my mind goes there. The scary thing is sometimes I realize I just don't care and don't feel like fighting anymore. You see? End Act 1. Exit stage left.
Gogo- my eyes filled when I read how you were happy and reconnected with your body and dancing. I had a full mental image going- and in the next sentence I wanted to come and knock your "neighbor" upside the head! I don't blame you for being pissed. If that person only knew how hard it is to come by those moments. I'd like to give them a knuckle sandwich!
Sula- what an adorable picture of you. Thanks for the suggestion. I do use a light box. It's a fact of my life that I fly high and fall low. I'm trying to take the least amount of drugs to protect my liver. It's living on the knife's edge. Having, having had cancer, WHATEVER, none of that helps.
Egg- I read your dream earlier and my thought as I read your post was how lovely it was that the message was so clear and resolved itself in the dream so I didn't think it needed further uninvited words. I think you were being told by your inner self that you are strong, and you will not be afraid (of heights or anything else) when it matters and that you can let go and be at peace. And you are not and will not be alone and it is ok. Just my sense. A lovely message and vote of confidence from your innermost being.
Ok Crazies, Beppy, Tomboy, Rainny, Octo, Ducky, Iris, and all of our vacationing friends. You are missed when you are not here, or just quiet. Hugs to all tonight.
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That's a good question Cubbie.
I was never offered any kind of session with a therapist until I went to pain management. In fact, no one even asked how I was doing emotionally. I'm not sure which is worse. To be asked and ignored or to be ignored all together.
I know just recently they've acknowledged that BC patients go through PTSD. You'd think they'd have a program in place for all patients. Honestly, the best therapy I've found has been right here on BCO. It's done a world of good for me knowing I'm not alone in the feelings and fears I have.
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Oh my Gaia!! A text? What a wimpy way to complain!!! Good for you for knocking on his door!!! You go girl!!
You should let him know you know a girl in the neighborhood! We will send Italychick to back you up!! hahahaha One mad Italian woman is bad enough, two would have him crying and apologizing for sure!! He would probably buy you a new, loud, stereo system.
Sorry....we've got to laugh at this nonsense.
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hello crazies,
I've been lurking a bit. I love reading your posts. Such a beautiful group of astoundingly strong, thoughtful, caring women you are! It would take four pages to catch up. Ducky loved your pictures, your children, your dancing and beautiful smile
. Sula you are amazing and Yumm! Katy, slow, cubbie, Gaia, tomboy, Octo, chi... You all make me smile or want to hug you.I went to pre-op today. Two weeks and counting. Planning, starting to wake in the middle of the night with a panicky feeling and just try to stuff it away... I know you all get it....
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Notagain- I sure do get it. Waking up in the night already in a knot before you are fully conscious. Sucks.
We are all hear for you, in a protective circle around. If you don't see our faces around you, check your pockets. Breathe deeply and slowly and think of our names when you wake up. I will post a sentry at the edge of my consciousness and if you wake up, my energy is instructed to go to you immediately. Ok?
(((NotAgain)))
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Notagain, I've got your surgery down for the 16th?? We will ALL be in your pocket that day!!
Panic attacks are awful. When going through treatment, I would dream myself into a panic attack and wake up catching my breath. That's why I chose the name slowdeepbreaths. I keep a brown bag in the drawer next to my bed. It helps to calm down the breathing when you're in a full blown attack. It really does help if you'd like to try it. That and the little white pill - Ativan. haha
We will all be here to get you through.
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just jumping in to wish everyone a good night! It will be a busy two days of work for me.....but know it is just work keeping me quiet if I am....then after Friday things begin to slow down for the holiday.....I am feeling better tonight, mostly because instead of being my usual hermit self we actually went out to dinner to celebrate a friends birthday. and get this: food tasted damn near normal! I had a burger with a fried egg over easy on it (the birthday boy wanted to celebrate at a local brew pub. Yes, those do exist in the Central Valley, though not in my little town..we had to go to the next town over :-)) Anyway....the burger with egg reminded me of burgers 'with the lot' in Oz. Beet and egg on a burger, yum! Good memories. I love Australia. Thinking of you tonight, Lucy...
I had something new at dinner that I've never tasted before. It was hard root beer. Interesting taste (more of a licorice taste than most root beer). I enjoyed it, now I need a long winter's nap!
((((Katy))))). ((((Cubbie))))), ((((gaia))))), and hugs to all of you! I hope all sleep well...
Octogirl
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Slow,
Ha! No I don't cook in my sleep...yet. I've just been doing so much now because of the restaurant menu gig. We retest every Sat nights d every day I drive past the place and the construction is just going strong!! Yikes!
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Sula, where can I find your blog? I want to make bread like that! It looks wonderful.
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Marijen- welcome! In case Sula's gone for the night, here is her blog address:
http://www.thecolorsofindiancooking.com
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gaia I love dancing too. In face, tonight I put on a bunch of oldies, like Sam Cooke, Chubby Checker, Roy Orbison, etc., and hubby and I danced around the house like idiots for an hour, totally sweated ourselves up and it felt great! Screw your neighbor, some people just have no joy left in life. I will come bitch slap him for you, just say the word
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I should post everyone's blogs at the opening of this thread so they are easy to find. Are there rules against that?? Mods???
Marijen, Welcome to Crazy Town!!
Please pull up a chair and make yourself comfortable. Here is your Crazy Town kit consisting of a flash light to look for lumps, a magnifying glass to get a closer look and a flashlight to see them in the dark. We also provide coconut oil that works on EVERYTHING. The pneumatic tubes will follow shortly. We use them to pass along delicious food and fun items. Tomboy is still working on the medicine bag. Very glad you found us!!
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SEE??? I told you. Italy will kick their butts!! hahaha
Italy, if you like Roy have you ever listened to the Traveling Wilburys??? If not, check them out. They've got some great songs.
Edited to add: Listen to End Of The Line.......great song!! Tribute to Roy...notice his guitar in the rocking chair.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cwqhdRs4jyA
Handle With Care
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Catching up a bit...
Lucy, a Crazy Town cruise ship to Australia would be awesome. We would have to get Ducky out on the cruise ship dance floor (after she recovers from the last wedding, of course). What a pain to have to cancel all your cards and get a new drivers license.
Ducky, Christmas music does seem so poignant when you've lost loved ones. The one that gets to me is "Have yourself a merry little christmas" - "through the years, we all will be together, if the fates allow"... My Dad died 30 years ago, and Christmas has never been quite the same, no matter how long it's been.
Rainny, you're right, this is really Supportive Town underneath the craziness. Our school board only holds meetings when it is snowing or icy!
Sandy, hope you enjoyed your evening.
Eggroll, I guess they figured you'd have all your questions after they were done? It does seem like they ought to hand that out first, you'd be better prepared. Is the nutrition class offered by the hospital?
Queenie, I like the idea of an anti-crazy day. I'm starting to think we all need to work those in.
Gaia, be sure to tell us about the other wedding site when you visit it. The first one as so picturesque. Shouldn't your neighbor text you, and not Seth, if he wants you to turn the music down?
Jackie, I'm expecting either to see my RO or talk to him on the phone in the next couple of days, so I think I will bring it up with him and see what he recommends. Lord knows I've had enough doctors feel my neck lymph nodes in the past month, you'd think something abnormal wouldn't have gone unnoticed. I actually did start a log a while back of all my worries. I think it has helped in a couple of ways. One is that it gives me an outlet - if I'm worrying about something, I tell myself, "OK, let's write that one down". It also gives me a record so I can note if there is a pattern - for instance if I have an ache that coincides with something I did at work, like standing all day. It's also interesting to note how I hop from one thing to another, and each symptom eclipses the last one, making me forget all about it. And it's helpful to see what things went away on their own.
If it's one thing I'm learning, it's that everyone's mind goes there. It's so universal. I can't decide whether to be comforted or even more scared by that. I know what you mean about not feeling like fighting - this diagnosis and the worry that goes with it takes so much out of you, it just drains you. We have to fight, though, there are people who need us.
NotAgain, I know exactly what you mean. I have those middle of the night, can't get back to sleep times, too. You are not alone, I am probably awake and feeling the same way.
Octo, woot for near-normal taste buds! Thank you for the hugs.
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Jackie, thank you! I found the blog and the bread. Going to give it a try but need one cloche. What a coincidence! I just signed up at Yummly last week! Was looking for gluten free, dairy free, soy free, banana bread and same for hummus.
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marijen,
Glad you found the link. If you enter gluten free, vegan or vegetarian into the search box you'll find plenty of those recipes
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Suladog, you have a very interesting life, I read your about me blog. So creative you are. The gluten free dairy free soy free was for my DIL, the bread is for me. She also can't eat yeast - she has a serious candida problem. I looked around for yeast substitute and I found one part baking soda, to one part lemon - must be added as the last ingredient. Have you ever tried that? I found the cloche at Amazon (from your link). It's getting late, I'll check back in the morning. And have a better look at your recipes. Those chocolate cookies sure look good! : )
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Lucy, I can relate--had my wallet lifted from my purse twice (the second time, with my phone) my checkbook stolen from my purse once, and my garage & car broken into (during a snowstorm!) and my briefcase--with confidential files and my trust acct. checkbook in it--taken from the trunk. The personal checkbook showed up (after I canceled the account and started a new one when I discovered the theft an hour later) two days later in an unmarked envelope shoved through my mail slot--with all checks and the register intact. I found the briefcase, with all its contents, in a snowbank alongside my garage. Both times my wallet was stolen, I went through the whole credit-card-canceling dance and the trip to the DMV for a new license. Two years ago, I had switched my credit cards to an RFID-proof clamshell case, and when I reached for the case at home one evening, it was missing. So I cancelled everything (my license remained in the wallet) and the day after I got the last of the new cards.....you guessed it....I saw a glint of shiny red between the passenger seat and my console. Yup--it had simply slipped out of my purse in the car after I'd gone through the ATM lane. I've since put a ponytail elastic around my credit card wallet for a little friction. And DS has had wallets and phones stolen or lost--most recently, left his wallet in a taxi in Austin, TX last Sept. (The day before my biopsy). At least he still had his phone so I could pick him up at O'Hare. He has since replaced all his credit cards but not his state photo ID. (The cabbie or the next passenger didn't have the decency to look him up or return the ID). And DH once had his phone slip out of his pocket on the “L" train (CTA) home from a party--before he even realized it was missing, the guy who found it phoned it and asked if he could come over and return it. He did--and declined to take a reward.
Cubbie, my skin seems to be turning adolescent on me. Got a couple of bumps at my hairline--thank goodness for bangs; also a smaller one on my shoulder on the opposite side from Super-Zit (which I think is beginning to shrink a bit). It's been my experience that every time I'm getting over some type of infection, the dying bacteria seem to bail out of my body through my skin!
Queen, enjoy “The Merry Widow." We saw “Beautiful" (the Carole King biographical musical) tonight, and unlike most “jukebox musicals" it was pretty good. The lead, Abby Mueller (Tony winner Jessie's sister--both are from Evanston) did a great job of nailing King's accent and alto voice--especially since she's also sung roles in musicals requiring a more traditional B'way soprano voice. The chronology was altered for the sake of the plot--rather than producer Kirschner pitting Goffin-King's “Pleasant Valley Sunday" and Mann-Weil's “We Gotta Get Outta This Place" against each other in competition for placement with the Monkees, “We Gotta Get Outta This Place" was a hit for the Animals in the summer of '65, the Monkees didn't debut till the fall of '66, and “Pleasant Valley Sunday" wasn't released until Nov. '67. (Yeah, I actually used to log Top 40 lists when I was in high school--I'd listen to out-of-town stations at night, sometimes with my radio beneath my pillow so my parents wouldn't hear).
Next week we're going to the Goodman Theater to see “A Christmas Carol." For the second year in a row, my voice teacher's son is playing Tiny Tim. For a kid whose face is plastered all over the marquee, ads and subway posters, he's remarkably level-headed and totally not “affected." Sweet kid.
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Oh, one more thing I forgot to mention yesterday about my visit to the PCP. When he was examining my seromas and said how well the axillary one seems to be doing, I asked him why the blackish discoloration on my armpit behind the SNB incision. He thought for a moment and asked, “How long ago was your last refraction?" I replied “a year and a half, but what does my vision have to do with my seroma?"
“Because that's not necrosis," he replied, “it's HAIR."
Yup, folks--after 2-1/2 months, my pits have finally decided to get furry again! Heeding the lymphedema scare sheet, I went out and bought an electric shaver.
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Gaia..........you know what I say to that..........Screw your neighbor and the horse she rode in on............I would have turned it up louder...............
You play as loud as you want, and dance as much and as long as you want..........your celebrating feeling a little more like yourself, so you go girl......
Ranting, go right ahead.......if it wasn't for BCO I would be in the loony bin now.......trust me, no matter how close, caring, or loving your family is......there comes a time when they think......Enough already...........not us.............you have to go through it, to understand it............no one really knows..................
Its like a man saying.........breath to you during labor when he is sitting there painless telling you what you should be doing...........REALLY HONEY..........come here, get close enough so I can punch you in the face while I try to push this watermelon in my belly through the "Keyhole" in the door............
Dance on Girlfriend..........
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ChiSandy: yep, that's us. Armpit hair? Exciting? Well, yes, under certain circumstances. I think.
NotAgain: another "I'll be in your pocket on the seventeenth."
But off to my anti-crazy day at the opera. We saw The Merry Widow a few years ago--I'll have to check my blog. But interesting to see how the Lyric does this staging.
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Hah, ChiSandy! The armpit story is a classic for the CT logs I think! (and inspiration for me as I wait impatiently for hair to come back..)
Speaking of inspiration, Sula, keep the food porn coming, please. That bread, yum....
Just looked at the calendar and Hanukkah starts Sunday night. Wow, that sneaked up on me. Most years I like to do a party or at least a family get together and make lots of latkes (potato pancakes)..yum! No party this year, but hubby has the task of finding Hanukkah candles in this small town (no small task, though we do have a Target and Target usually has them) and I will make latkes for the two of us this weekend. And I will send some through the tubes, of course!
yep, I echo Ducky's thoughts: Dance on sisters!
Octogirl
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