Shadow in chest is recurrence
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Liz/Marion,
The fasting depends on what is being scanned. I am frequently told that I cannot eat several hours before the scan and that I need to drink a litre of water within the hour before the scan. However, I have also frequently been told when I get there that fasting/water was not actually necessary. I suspect it is for stomach, colon and other internal organs that could be influenced by food and fluid levels.
Well, decision finally made regarding my trip. I will likely arrive in London on May 22nd with a few days there before I board my British Isles cruise. Twelve days and numerous stops in Ireland, Scotland etc. I return to London on June 6th for a few more days in London. Unfortunately, it does mean that I won’t be able to meet you Liz and Claire when she is in “town” but the dates work better for me. Can’t wait!
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Hi all,
What a strange week it has been. Yesterday was the coldest March day on record and we have the army and police helping stranded motorists. Complete meltdown. The rest of the world who deal with this kind of weather all the time must be looking on with a wry smile on their faces!
Love to you all. X
Will catch up over the weekend.
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Hi Liz,
Pat is spot on - on a CT with IV contrast - uptake in blood vessels may give false positive in the stomach lining if filled with a meal and active. Very few cases reported but it's something they do.
Brilliant - love snow - and miss it!!
Pat - couldn't be happier you have booked your trip - sounds fabulous!
Totally agree with your scan decision.
Hugs to all,
😊🌷🐣
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How exciting Pat! Will PM you later, just got to get through today.
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Hi all,
The CT scan was Fri and I was fine in terms of the cannula was fitted by the expert nurse and was first attempt and pain free.
Unfortunately I find myself in a dark place again. For about a week now I have been aware of swelling over top of rib cage under the left ) affected Breast)
No pain, but a bit tender now with all the prodding. I can see this swelling as I look in the mirror. It is something.
So feeling like this I feel I have to go back to York tomorrow and see if someone will take a look at me. I don’t have an appointment but I’m hoping I will be seen even if I wait a while. Maybe they could fast track the CT report.
I’m already wondering about when:if there is a new area of concern. I have just 2.5 weeks left before the Easter holidays begin. Part of me thinks I might be better just being off from work now while I sweat out this post scan period. I am very achy from the lettozole and as you can see mental state poor.
L x
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Oh Liz. How I wish I were closer so that we could meet for a cup of tea. I understand completely and unfortunately, the post scan anxiety is something we will both face many times. We also become so ultra aware of our bodies in this situation.
I know it’s difficult but don’t imagine this symptom is ominous. It doesn’t sound like something cancer related based on your description but yes, have it looked at for your own piece of mind. Hopefully they can ease your worry and give you the results of your scan.
Sending a big hug and lots of positive thoughts your way! Pat.
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Liz, the CT should show if anything at all~~I know how hard the waiting game is but if there is any way to fast track go and beg for it s that you can hopefully have peace of mind. It does not help that it is the weekend for you but is there anything that gives you pleasure that you can turn to now.
Hugs, Marian
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Thanks Pat and Marian,
I’m grateful for you responding. I am going to get up and make some tea to drink with you in spirit Pat. For a while now I have been thinking about anxiety meds. I just need to have yet another appointment to get some, but that can be sorted within the day on Monday.
Last night we spent hours looking for a week’s holiday over Easter to find some sun. I live only a few miles from an airport: it’s called Robin Hood can you believe! Anyway this recent cold snap has resulted in a surge for holidays! However, unfettered I shall have another look.
The appointment for results is not until 22 March and the holiday period begins on Fri 23 March.
Marian, thank you so much for being there too.
Perhaps I just need a good rest from what is of course a demanding job.
L
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Liz
It takes minimum of 2-3 working days to get a films read, unless you drag a radiologist out, at least here.
Tomorrow go to your local doctor and get the anxiety meds, you don't have to take them, just get them as a back up - then take the day/days off - tell him about the lump/prominence - do not stress it would be a most unusual presentation.
Try and contact York on Tuesday and ask for your results - if you are getting nowhere, then go to York.
I think you will not need the whole 2.5 weeks off but it does sound a few days to walk and pamper will do you the world of good.
Take the time off Liz if you need it -the school will not fall apart without you.
😊
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I am on call this week/end - does that sound familiar but had a light week last week.
Friday I shouldhave tied up a thousand things that needed doing...my day off .
But no - I went out to a local waterhole instead ( second time in one week 😱)
It is 20 minutes away from my home and I have never taken the time to swim there before - it is brilliant because the water is super salty and breaming with fish and
Magnificent creature.
Little fish and chips shop just next to it. A fish and chips shop with fresh oysters.
Now I have a very very messy house...and I am stressing the home help tomorrow will find us disorganised.
Reading a book called The wife drought Why women need wives and men need lives by Annabelle Crabb.
And on the subject of reading the liver thread last few post on CDK4/6 resistance are good.
😊🌷🐣
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So take the time off if you need to.
Sending you GC heat!!😊🍷
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Ioana,
Thank you for your advice. I feel a little calmer this afternoon. I watched ‘To kill a mockingbird’ and ironed a new spotty silk blouse for work.
Unfortunately I have an additional problem, apart from anxiety and puffy rib! In London, I pulled my left knee and although it settled down a bit, I have damaged it again with the walk to York hospital on Fri. So I am sitting with an ice pack on it. I won’t be able to drive with it like this. Will go and get it checked.
The water hole looks beautiful. Ioana, going there on your day off is a good thing! Don’t worry about a messy house. You are doing what’s right for you. I should heed the same advice.
Reading: there is a delightful, little book shop in York and I treated myself on Fri. Currently reading: ‘ A separate peace ‘ by John Knowles. Will check out the wife drought book. Is the title- why women need lives and men need wives?? ☺️
X
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So glad you are feeling calmer Liz but do push for results on that scan. Good lord, three weeks for results? You need to let them know that you want them sooner going forward. That delay is unacceptable. It makes me even more grateful for my MO. He simply sends me an email if things are stable. Of course, the down side to this is that if he calls or books an appointment I something is up.
Sorry to hear about the knee. We deal with so much already... you would think that the ailments of getting older (and less flexible) would leave us alone! 😜
Lovely place to swim Ioana. I’m pleased to hear that you took a day for yourself. I have noticed that I’m building a bit of immunity to the sight of dog hair. The dirt will be there tomorrow....
Hugs to all. Pat.
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Hi Liz,
I am glad to hear you are feeling better. I usually try to watch home videos of favourite movies when feeling down.
Iona - the picture is lovely!!
Thank you all for your responses on my question. I am not thinking of doing the recon now but once regression or stable disease it shown. Also, thinking later in the year. I will try to get an appointment with the plastic surgeon after May and depending if I get any of the new jobs I have applied for.
My sister's surgery is on May 21 and it has been confirmed as uterine cancer but grade 1. She will have a hysterectomy with some sentinel nodes being removed a long with the fallopian tubes. She is 42 and I don' know if she was ever planning to have kids but at least she will keep her ovaries.
I was a bit surprised yesterday and not sure if I need to worry yet ut it would appear that I have lost 4.4 pounds in a week. I don't think I did anything more than the other weeks and I have never lost this much in a week. I will monitor and see if this continues ... I have about 10-13 more pounds to lose to be at my ideal weight and I think this is helping me achieve it but I am also wondering if it is a sign of something else going on. I have no symptoms of anything going wrong and unless this is a side effect of the meds I will take.
Hugs to you all.
Lola
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This is the bit that I thought I posted twice - it’s a sand enclosure which forms a salty waterhole - you can tell by the number of pelicans the water is fish full...
The book is called The Wife Drought - the rest is like a subtitle. It is far from lyrical but not feminist - she manages to just describe the state of play.
A long time ABC political commentator with three children ...
I will get both John Knowles and the Road Dahl suggestion - I love your imagination Liz - now every time a surgeon is relaxed I imagine him gulping down a baguette 😉
Hugs to all
😊🌷
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I am going to share with a rather unusual but true anecdote.
A strong and beautiful clinician I know, was going through a particularly rough time - ( nah not me), and she became so stressed by the situation she was in that she used to have two recurrent thought processes:
- one was that her two children would fall from a balcony - a problem since they lived on the ninth floor
- the other that as she walked down the street a fence wall would crumble on top of her
She saw an old prof of psychiatry and requested anti-anxiety meds. He said after listening to her - here they are but first I want to try this - read cheap travel romance or detective stories. " What do you mean ?" was her answer for she mixed in a world where Russian literature was the norm. I mean give yourself a chance to escape and heal, read some trash, spend some time in a world of no problems, where all ends well. "But I hate cheap trashy novels - Hmmm, you also hate taking tablets"
The crazy thing is that for her it worked - three months later she had started to learn a little about lightness. and the walls stopped moving. Her outside stress situation remained the same for about 4-5 years after which she found/more like dug a way out.
There is no question that dopamine modulates brain pathways involved in fear and anxiety.
There is a huge body of work in this area.
http://nova.newcastle.edu.au/vital/access/manager/...:12235
And certainly there are biological genetic factors that cause depression. BUT in those who have anxiety as a result of a major life stress - the pathways were essentially intact to begin with - and they need SPECIAL nurturing to try and stay healthy. So whether it's a crazy book, a walk, a precious hour doing bugger all - think of all pampering as you would of essential medication. Your daily dopamine fix if you like.
Quite happy to going into the nitty gritty of the neurophysiology - unfortunately a lot of anti anxiety meds have potential interactions with anaesthetics - so full bottle on it...
Liz let us know how your knee is - when you can.
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Hello everyone,
So it is Monday morning here and I e mailed work to say I would not be in.
I am icing the knee as I type this. The deputy head has just called me. If you are a Roald Dahl fan you will know what I mean when I say Miss Trunchball! She has just called me and said: ‘ We do have a wheelchair in school’
So I really should rest it, elevate it, ice it but you can see what sort of pressure I am under. My initial worry was driving on it.This woman sent her kids to boarding school and so has zero empathy for any personal issues too; she belongs in another era really.
Ioana, these are the other books I purchased. Quite random selection. Spent £30 and so left the bookstore before that total increased.
- ‘A history of Britain in 21 women’ by Jenni Murray.
- ‘Stone Matters: nine wicked tales’ by Margaret Atwood.
- ‘ Regeneration’ by Pat Barker.
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Thank you Liz,
I have picked at the plot of A separate Peace. Ok a little off the beaten path of trashy romance novels - go detective if you have to.😱🙄🙃
Thank you for sharing - love Margaret Atwood. I am a little odd I always read better when I am told what to read. I can't believe I have told you that - it's a little more complicated than, that but you get the drift.
So you have made my evening!😊🌷
Do not worry about Trunchball - yep we love Matilda. A stupid thing to say - I can't expect she proposes you or anyone take care of children while under the effect of strong pain medication.
Needless to say her comments open her up to culpability - if you were under duress from a superior and feared for your job when you already stated you are unwell and can not come in - and then had a car accident on the way to school...
The reality is that firing a English teacher just diagnosed with Breast Cancer on IV treatment and a great capacity to write is LOTS of trouble - they are not going to do it - just be sure you document why - as you have and take care of yourself. Also encourage them to text you or message you or email you - avoid phone conversations with such people. I usually send my message very timely (the night before) and finish it by saying as I need my rest - I will not be contactable for...please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as I am feeling better.
(suspect the kids asked to go to boarding school - there I am being unkind)
Enjoy your day!! That well deserved stretchy and cup of tea!
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First of all, Liz I really did laugh out loud~~not because your deputy head said what she did, but by Ioana's return of "suspect the kids wanted to go to boarding school." I have a friend from our Saudi days who taught at a boarding school where kids as young as 5 went. She told me about these little ones who cried themselves to sleep every night for ages. We sent our kids out for their last 3 years of high school and though they had reasonably good experiences, in hindsight I might not have done so. However it did allow us our life now and they are all doing well.
This book was mailed to me a by a friend to bring on this trip and I did enjoy it. My friend Suzanne who was with us for 2 weeks of this trip and for the sailing bit suggested not to give it to our son Steven's girlfriend who will be crew from Tahiti to Victoria. "Love With a Chance of Drowning" by Torre DeRoche. Ioana, the author is an adventurous Australian. It was the first book I had managed to read through since August so this is a sign to me that this NZ month has been good for me.
Liz, it is ridiculous to wait so long. Ioana, I managed to get results from MRI and CT 2 days after each but only by being assertive~~my MO and my pain doctor called radiology and got the tentative results. The longest I ever waited was 3 weeks post lumpectomy and that is standard in BC~~we are supposedly each assigned a pathologist and even if he/she is on holiday or whatever that is/was protocol.
Lola is it possible that stress is causing the weight loss? Ioana, I love pelicans and saw thousands when we sailed in the Caribbean. We saw mot of the important birds on an island bird reserve a couple of weeks ago and loved that. But Australia makes NZ look boring for birds!
I am having several hours on my own today at SIL's house with fabulous views. My son and girlfriend and her mom who arrived Friday have gone off sailing for the day~~it is cool and windy and showery so a good day to find out about sailing. She will have months ahead though from Tahiti lucky her!
DiV, how are you? Any change in phantom/nerve pain?
This was my view not long ago.
Hugs to you all,
Marian
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Marian that view is lovely!!!
I don't think the stress is causing the weight loss. I have had more stressful times than dealing with the recurrence.....it feels like I don't have cancer. I am asymptomatic which is the way we want to keep it and my menopausal symtomps has subsided, I am not sure if immune system impairment has anything to do with the weight loss. I am not eating as much as before...my neutrophils are down to 1.4 from 2 and I knew that was the case as I had cold sores twice in a row in a matter of two weeks.
I have my first scan after my diagnosis in two weeks....hoping it shows some regression or stable disease....
For the ladies that went they menopause how long did it take for the side effects to subside??? Mine have become very minimal in the past couple of weeks after a month and a half of very strong symptoms. I am not complaining but I am just wondering.
Well ladies it is 11:30pm and I have to drive to work tomorrow but I am so hooked on his show The good doctors that I don't want to go to sleep.
Hugs
Lola
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Hi all
I am waiting for the train to York to take me for another HP treatment.
Work has been very stressful this week. The headteacher asked to speak to me and noted that I have 4 absences since January that he classed as unrelated to the ones for tx. Apparently I make him nervous about time tabling classes next year and “ teachers at independent schools need a certain amount of resilience.” This was a chat but I am under the spotlight. One absence was a Fri when I had post tx fatigue but they said that on other occasions I have been in school.
A good friend of mine has given me some advice to ride the storm a while and not make a, ( excuse the pun) knee jerk reaction. So I have been smiling. I didn’t particularly argue back and it has passed. The Head of department had a go as well thought about my abrupt e mail. I had 8 lessons to write cover for and so a long description of my ailment was not the priority!
It will pass, it isn’t fair but people are generally clueless about cancer and so I just get on with what I can. Down the line this could be a blip or it could turn into me suing them. I really can’t call it!
More in a second....
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Ioana,
Thank you for pointing out that I am protected to a good degree here and that is a comfort but I just don’t want any hassle. If it comes to it though I will challenge them. Let’s hope it doesn’t.
Lola, I have hot flushes but they come and go in seconds. My joints though are painful and my knee is worse because of the letrozole. Being menopausal hasn’t been dreadful though as I sort of expected.,
Marian,
Thanks for the book recommendation. Will check it out.
We now have the baguette munching surgeon and the deputy head’s kids locked away in a vicious English boarding school to play with.
I feel a theme going on here...
Pat, i will get to your PM as soon as I can.
Z- how’s things?
D- chime in when you can
Clare- ❤️
L
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Liz,
Your headmaster is a self centered bully.
He is also an idiot - resilience is the capacity to recover from difficulty. There is no proof of resilience for those who have not had difficulty.
Having said that I understand you not wanting hassle. I was prepped for court once - try and answer everything with yes or no, do not give away a thing, women have a tendency to say too much because they want to fix things, and remember if you want his coat make him feel warm.
It will blow over.
More importantly you will have to find a way to carve some time for yourself.
And gently try and find a few allies at school - it's a team game - and if they treat people this way you are likely not the only person put out.
If anyone knows how ...chime in.
Please believe that on a smaller scale I am dealing with the same shit.
I have clearly asked not to be lumped with more on call than my colleagues (we have 22 men associates and 3 women - ohhh yes). Every 3 monthly roster I do 1 night more - not enough to not make me look like a bitch for complaining but enough to piss me off.
I could list a few other items - the latest email from the group list allocator 🙄 - could I pleeease do the very long Tuesday ( not my surgeon, 0700 start and likely 10 pm finish ) because the only other person available is trying to cut back for health reasons ( my age, divorced, kids live with wife, overweight - that is all I know). This is in the context of me saying I would prefer not to cover colleagues who work with surgeons who operate electively for more than 12 hours. I strongly encourage all my surgeons to keep their list/days to 10-12 hours of elective theatre time.
Hugs to all,
😊🌷🐣
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hi Liz feel for you re work as i have been there.
Here in NSW to belong to a union was very important as issues like this need to be carefully recorded a union support person would attend if requested
Please make certain that you carry a diary and always record the discussion as it happens. Bullying can be ve ry subtle.... Even better state to the person that info being discussed would be benefical if it was given to you in in writing so youcould check....
Also if asked to attend a meeting you would be entilted to have someone with you as support. Working in the private system has the same workplace policies with regard to staff wefare
Also it would be beneficial to print off a hardcopy of any work employment welfare policies related to leave ,leave without pay and check your sick leave entiltements
Big huggs
Bright in hope
Nb Always back up time off with medical certificate..it is no ones business to discuss or query the reasons for your health leave if this does happen it is bullying harrasemement.
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Hi guys,
The weekend has landed and I am taking a breath.
Firstly, Ioana and Bright: I am so touched by your support. Bright I know we have chatted about work before and at this point I think I would be wise to seek the opinion of a union. In the meantime I will record the events of this past week and plough onwards. We break up in ten days time- can’t wait!
Got stacks of marking to do this weekend but for now I’m drinking tea and watching the rugby- England v France.
I hope you are all having a nice weekend x
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Liz, I am so glad for all the support for you here but also for the advice and steps that you are taking. It seems incomprehensible that heads of school can be so lacking in compassion.
DiV, still thinking about you. I often wonder about your adaptation over this past year. Though my arm works fine, have really noticed in the just the 4 weeks I was away, how much more diminished the strength is in my hand. I had never struggled to put items in the overhead bins before but I could not do it well yesterday and today and I so much dislike asking for help all the time. But I got home today and sister and BIL leave Tuesday so am going to make an effort to start looking for ways to adapt with the use of my left hand.
Great time away but so happy in my own bed with my cats.
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https://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/891251
https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamaoncology/arti...
This work refers to melanoma and beta blockers. It seems that beta blockers modulate immunotherapy in a positive manner.
What no one is willing to come out and spell out is "what is the effect of stress on cancer?"
Most epidemiology studies would say negligible but will all know/feel/experience it otherwise....
Exercise clearly decreases recurrence and improves outcome across all stages.
Now we have beta blockers showing a significant effect in a small but prospective study.
The other thing that bugs me big time is - a lot of drugs that are cheap, we have and may show some benefit get often put aside as part of the package:
- bone strengthening agents are not given to all women who are on post menopausal or on AI
- low dose aspirin is not prescribed to all early post menopausal women who do not have a contraindications to taking it
- metformin is not prescribed to all Stage 4 or women with glucose intolerance
And that is just scratching the surface of " potential additionals"
Marian,
😊 I have been meaning to say this for a few posts now.
I will check out the book - I totally get what you mean by concentration - I could not read easily for months, just getting back in my stride. Beautiful photo - just my sort of thing. I love the green of it all.
Liz,
You did the right thing!
We finally got some decent rain - and the evenings are cool.
Everyone - come over I am making pancakes - a bottle of Pinot and a bowl of raspberries.
Claire - if you are up to reading - they are for you!!
😊🌷🐣
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Hi All,
It's been a bit hectic for me the last couple of weeks. Lots to do at home, medical appointments and, of course, planning that trip. I finally feel like it is coming together (albeit in a ghastly expensive way - I'm not used to spending this kind of money on leisure!) which is good as I am definitely getting planning fatigue. Cruise booked and paid for, hotels in London booked with a small amount of drama (thank you Liz for your help - turns out rooms were disappearing by the minute due to the Chelsea Flower and Garden Show) and flight booked and paid. Now I have to turn my mind to excursions but that can wait a few days, allowing time for my credit card to cool off! LOL.
I had blood work last week and, good news, the tumour markers are down. I have never had extremely elevated levels so am not sure if this is statistically significant. Unfortunately, my MO has been somewhat sporadic when asking for the TMs. As a result, I only have three measures but it was higher in December so hopefully that means the Faslodex is doing its job. I see my MO on Friday (same day as my next shots... oh joy) and then CT scan a week later. Hopefully all is well as there is no going back on that trip!
Hope you all are well and Liz... hope this week is better. Ioana, sorry I missed the pancakes!
Hugs. Pat
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Pat,
I found the tins for a bargain - your words in the mist of a storm - grateful for my newadopted mantra.😊🌷🐣🍷
Great news on the TMs!
Liz,
I feel a bit bad because I encouraged you to take that time off if you needed it - hoping it all settled - are you closer to getting that Scan reported??
Thinking of you all!
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Pat, often spending a little more on a holiday gets you a lot more in comfort and satisfaction. Fingers crossed on good results carrying on right into holiday mode. My CT this morning was rescheduled for Thursday night at 8:30 PM but luckily that could not work as no staff on for port access. The only machine broke down and I can only hope that it will be up and running for tomorrow as she did find me a good spot and it is in between my Faslodex injections and my MO appt. tomorrow AM. 0845 injections, 0915 show up for CT at 1000, see MO at 1100. Liz and Pat, you are quite right about the fasting prior to the CT. a liter of clear fluid but no food unless necessary for meds and then just a small amount.
Even though I have lost most of the strength in my right hand and would say the pain from my scapula through my shoulder and down to my hand (hand the worst) is worse, I still don't think the tumour has grown. Power of positive thinking.
Hugs to you all,
Marian
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