My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Philly,
Wahoo!!! So glad everything has been worked out. But to put you through that at all is completely unfair. BTW, I love the Funktrain cartoon! Simply awesome.
Moomala,I'll be thinking of you as you get started on your new tx. I am feeling better about getting started on mine. Thanks Moving for your words of support. I appreciate it!
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hello lovelies~ Philly. !!!! Thank goodness. My gosh what the heck do people even think, when they are dealing with Ibrance. I just finished a three month break. I think your mo will say you're ok with a few days! So glad it's resolved.
I just woke up. Again second. Nap today. I am also stuck in the wind tunnel of the cyclone bomb. Terribly windy. Everything's blowing all over the place, good thing it wasn't trash day. That's the worst.
Grannax~Hugging you, I know this stupid cancer shit sucks.
Santa~ LOL at you pointing out you got roll called. I'm loving that sense of Mae humor!!! You're home is here also you know?!!! Feel the warmth as you enter! Traveling ? Where? That's awesome!
Masonsma~ glad that move is over. I've lived here 21 years I'm afraid to know what's in this house. We've had 22 hamsters, some been crabs, two dogs. I can't lie and say that some hamsters didn't end up swimming in the sump pump, because they did. But it was called the hamster hotel. You'd have thought I was dealing something, when we were trying to give hamsters out free to anyone who wanted one or ten!!! The kids will never forget that. They still Talk About it! You must have had hard time getting rid of things. I still have my dads boxes in my Closet. His clothing. I can't part with it yet. Just not ready. So I can understand the feeling!!
Moomala~Your pants are going to fall Down woman! You're loosing. And i open my mouth and gain immediately! Arghhh! I blame my DH and his yummy cooking. That is a lot of weight loss. Just rest assured knowing. I have enough for us all.
BooBoo~Love you sweetheart!0 -
Hi all, saw Mel mention me in one of her wonderful roll calls. This thread moves really fast. It's hard to keep up sometimes.
I've been busy trying to get our temporary office set up after the fire so we can begin seeing patients again. Total headache. On top of that I have a UTI. I'm thankful it's not painful but hate going pee every 10 minutes. Ack!!!
I'm hoping everyone finds a remedy for the funk that seems to be catching. No fun at all.
Sending prayers, good vibes, and positive mojo to anyone with upcoming scans or who are moving on to a new treatment.
Hugs to all
Laine
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Hey everyone. Had a good day today up until I lost control of my bowels again. I cannot take this SE. I cannot imagine trying to live with this permanently. I did call the cancer clinic but I am to the point of telling them to keep the drugs. I can't live with having to worry if something is going to happen or being so constipated that I feel like I will explode. Trying to tell myself to make the best of it but it really really sucks so bad. It's only going to get worse for me with each infusion. I don't know what to do. Trying not to cry over this but really have had enough of this.
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Mara,
That would be difficult to put up with. Can they reduce the dose?
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I plan to ask what we can do. I would have no problem just taking immodium but then I am constipated.
I will ask again if we have to keep perjeta in this treatment. If it means I will lose my other drug Herceptin, I will just start taking immodium all the time after a BM to avoid this later. I just can't take the not knowing when I will have an accident but I just don't want to be set back by this issue. The only gain I have made today is that although I have complained here, I did not actually cry which is a big deal for me. I will try not to see it as such a problem since I know other people don't cry over this and still live good lives even if dealing with incontinence on a permanent basis. Guess I need to grow up a lot when it comes to stuff like this. It's the SE related stuff that reduces me to tears versus my own cancer. Funny how that can work.
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YES Mara!!! The side effects bother me more than the cancer! Exactly. Ok lady - it's ALL cry-able stuff. I am glad you are glad you didn't cry today but if you did that would be okay. I hope you also found something to laugh about today. That would really make it an okay day. Someone on this thread a long while back that their deal breaker is losing their hair That does not bother me at all but other things do and I'd be crying over them for sure. Everyone's different and different things bother us. No growing up about it. Trust me there a lot of people in this world who are plenty grown up and would be on their knees at what you've already been through. You can do this! More importantly I agree with you that a little advocacy for yourself is in order if you can. That's affecting your QOL period. Someone needs to help you get D under control. Big hug!
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Thank you so much Moomala. My evening was better. Watched a Star Wars movie which always cheers me up. Took some immodium and decided to let it go for the evening.
On the plus side, I got my new wig in the mail and it looks really nice. I am always perked up when I have new hair. I did not mind losing my hair permanently because it opened up a new world of colours and styles.
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Mara you do rock your hair.
Enjoying my company tonight but tomorrow I’ll have to sleep late so we’ll be doing after afternoon stuff.
Tany
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Hi everyone, I do read most days, but sometimes this moves so fast I just cannot keep up. I think of you all every day, I sympathise with ladies suffering se's etc. I've been lucky over the last while, but I know if things go wrong you will all be there to hear me.
Much love xxxx
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Mara,
I am feeling your pain. There is nothing worse than not having control of your bowels. You feel like your dignity is being compromised!!
Today is my last day of radiation to my hips, and I have been nauseous the whole time. I told my DH that this is the last time I am doing radiation. I have decided that if I cannot live a good QOL, than I’m going to stop treatment. I don’t want to continue to feel this way until the end.
But today is a new day, so chin up for all of us. Moomala is right. We can do this!
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Booboo, thank you. I am sorry the hip rads are making you nauseous. That really sucks. Surprised they wouldn't have offered anti nausea pills since they are not far from your abdomen.
As far as I go, I have to get over myself. Realistically, I would suffer more with meta than incontinence so stopping treatment is not in the cards. I will have to quit complaining and get real. I can look after myself with this problem. People deal with it every day and don't whine like me.
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Lanie~I am still so sorry about that fire at your office. Wow. Scary stuff. It really shows you how fast something like that can happen.
Minnie~Hello lovely. I'm glad you're doing well lately and no worries on catching up. Just put your feet up and let us entertain you in the funk train!!! I am forcing a shower today. Can't go out attracting flies.
BooBoo~, I am so sorry that you have it with radiation. I can't speak from experience there, I've never had it. But I know it's taxing. I have thrown around the stopping treatment at times. Which is why I was granted my three month break from Ibrance. We need breaks our bodies are tired. Constant daily battles, I'm so sorry for your hip pain. I swear my hip pain only comes when I lay for too long in the same place.
Mara~ I am hoping your today is a good one. I am joining your ranks.... my stomach had some explosive issues first up with coffee.. that's never a good sign. I'll be grabbing the Imodium along with you. Hope you're feeling better!
Waving to Tanya and Moomala!!! 👋👋🌹🌹💗
Hello to all. And much love ~M~
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This ring is a family heirloom, my mother is giving me her precious items for me to enjoy. Ever since my father passed she's been thinning out her items. They haven't been married in over 47 years but it got to her. This ring is over 85 years old. It belonged to my aunt Marilyn who died at the age of 20 due to kidney failure. My mother was aged 10, when she passed away. My mother held itfor all those years and now it's mine. I get a special feeling when I put it on, its so special to me words cannot explain. She was an amazing woman and I knew that just by the stories. This is my happy thing today. To own such a part of my family history, but to own such beauty from such a beauty touches my soul! sorry to babble It just hit me with such joy! Love to all! It's a garnet. And so beautiful!0 -
Ok Ladies. Bear with me. Yesterday was "We can do this." And " Find a little happiness in your day". And today----- cried twice so far, and only been up 2 hours. Monday is my scans. Hoping stable, of course. But knowing at some point there will be progression. Thinking about how my family continues to let me down. And what is it going to be like when things get much worse. Then looked at obits online. Always do to see if I know anyone and BAM... saw obit of 32 year old woman from next town over-didn't know her. DIED AFTER LONG BATTLE WITH BREAST CANCER. DAMN IT DAMN IT DAMN IT. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And there goes the water works again. This is serious shit. And I am right in the middle of the pile.
Damn I need a Hug right now. I don't want to do this. Can I do this.
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Good morning friends. I'm feeling better yesterday and today.
Also getting some things done around here. Javier has put on an antique screen door. He found it on a 1906 home in FT Worth. It goes out to my patio. Also he's painting my front door and porch. He also power washed all my windows. There's no end to projects that need to be done around here.
Why do so many crazy things happen to us while we're just trying to extend our lives? Seems like everyone here is dealing with a lot.💞
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Mara you always strike me as a very strong minded woman, who is the opposite of a whiner. You have a lot of grit! I am in awe of your attitude.
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It's funny but I went to have a bowl of cereal this morning. Noticed I thought it tasted funny and I took a look at it. The milk had gone off. It's also funny that the last couple of days, I did not enjoy my cereal. I am thinking that bad milk may be partially responsible for my digestive woes. I am so surprised I did not notice it sooner. I am usually way more on top of these things. I know I still have SE but they may not be as bad as I thought because who know how long the milk has been bad.
Santabarbarian, I try to just make up my mind to deal with things. It can take a long time for me to reach a conclusion. Like today, deciding if I want to take a rest day or walk. Walking is better for me but I also waffle a lot or find stuff to do on the computer. Housework is not bad as my apartment is quite small. Literally takes a minute to vacuum the whole thing. As far as my personal attitudes, I have to maintain a tight reign on myself as I tend to really make any health issue a catastrophe for myself. I am wimpy with pain or minor issues and can be quite a suck. Only with myself. I need to keep telling myself to keep going in spite of things or I won't do anything at all. Nobody here to kick my butt but me. I usually use everyone here as my example of persistence with all of the treatments they are on and yet they do way more than I do. They work, have more social engagements etc and I am here at home not doing much with mostly OK health issues. I need to expect a little more from myself.
Thankfully, I have not bothered my brother and SIL with my tales of woe is me. They need a break and I am not having an emergency issue. I can learn to live with stomach issues again, don't need to like them but have to learn to live with them. Mention it to the MO and let her deal with it. I know if I truly don't want certain drugs, I can say no BUT there is not much freedom here in Canada to go against how the drugs are given. I don't want to give up all treatment. Can't see that at this point anyway.
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Mel, the ring as well as your manicure are beautiful. Glad that it is bringing you some well deserved happiness.
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Mel. Beautiful ring! So wonderful when you know the history of a great piece. When my Aunt had to leave her job due to MS, she started selling her valuable to pay for her health assistants. I was one of her faithful purchasers, and although her rings will fit my daughter, there is a special joy when I see them.
Booboo. Hope you start feeling better soon.
Mara. Fingers crossed that the milk has been the culprit. I completely understand the frustration and tears about this particular side effect.
Candy. Sending you an all day cyber hug. It is devastating to read daily about women who are dying from BC. Personally, it is almost worse to read about one of the ladies posting at BCO who have progressed and are changing medications. This disease sucks and is worthy of your tears--yours too Mara. I believe you must allow yourself to acknowledge this is a deadly battle/fight/journey (pick your choice), and allow yourself grief and tears. But I would also say after that--find something that does bring you joy. Your advice yesterday was spot on. Embrace that, and then just do one step after the other. You CAN do this and all of us are here to support you while you do so. No family is perfect. And none of them will understand. But those of us here in the 'living room' will send as many cyber hugs as needed to help you keep stepping forward. All anyone can do is their best.
Grannax. Happy to see you are getting things done. DH and I have a multi page list now that we are back home. The challenge is putting them in order!
Hugs everyone!!!
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Candy, you can do this. You can. I'm sending you the warmest hug you could ever imagine.
I know how terrifying this all is but you got this. From reading your posts, I know you can handle just about anything. You seem like a very wise and grounded person.
I know your faith is important to you so I'll be praying for deep peace and strength for you.
I'll be in your pocket on Monday.
PS: YOU GOT THIS
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Candy, I took your advice and found some happiness yesterday (with nuts on top!) 😋
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Thank you ladies. Here I go again crying. But a good cry. THANK YOU LAINE. You don't know how much your words mean to me right now. Your kind words, from a total stranger, are more than I get from my family. Not exaggerating. I fear getting worse, but I truly fear facing it alone. I honestly do not think my family members will be there when things get worse. Why would they when they are not here now.
Mara- Hoping your stomach issues get better. Bad milk- good grief. Hahaha. But seriously talk with your MO. QOL is important and with the incontinence issues you need some relief.
Mel- The ring is beautiful and I love your nails.
Grannax- Fun getting things done around the house, isn't it. Pics please.
Moving- Thank you for your words of encouragement. Crazy how one day I feel hope and want to enjoy things and the next I am lower than a snake.
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Mae- Now that is what I mean !!!!!!!! Yes. You go, girl. The small things. Get enjoyment from them.
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Candy, thank you again. Doing better today. Just taking it easy doing short walking bursts on my treadmill. I pick a song, walk really fast. Repeat several times. I enjoy that more than long walks and they are just as good for you.
Decided to just keep buying the Tena underwear as it is comfortable and not terribly visible under my leggings. Even if I don't need them a particular day, the security is better. I am going to stay on treatment and just use immodium after EVERY bm. I don't get super constipated and that usually helps. Between all the fiber and water and walking, don't think I have to worry. No point waiting for the inevitable. Hit it before it happens. Still gonna talk to MO.
Mae, I am with you about the sundae. I could have it without the peanuts since they don't agree with me. I may make plans to visit my nearest McD's. I could even go to my favourite burger place (Harvey's), get a junior burger and bus it up to the McD's for dessert. Would be a fun thing to do. Thanks for giving me a good idea for inexpensive stuff to do. Plus all my bus stops require more walking as well. That is great!
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Candy, I did think the milk thing was pretty funny myself. I am usually so paranoid about bad food but obviously missed it. The milk carton even reeked. Surprised I did not notice the smell. Oh well. Did not have any today, spat out the cereal as soon as I tasted it.
Speaking of my sense of humour, came across this which fits me to a tee. It made me laugh quite a bit.
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Candy, you are very welcome. From what I can tell you are a courageous person and I believe you will handle anything with the same courage you have shown post after post.
Mel, beautiful ring and beautiful nails for a beautiful woman! 3 of my daughters are taking me to get mine done today for my birthday.
Mae, I WANT THAT!! Did you finish your four letter note cards? Did I miss that post? Where dem pics at???
Mara, I have to tell you...you are amazing!! I have a UTI and have been peeing frequently and I'm just so cranky about it. What you are enduring makes me feel like a whimp. You've got grit, girl!
I can never remember everyones name but I'm hoping everyone that posts here is doing as well as possible.
Laine
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Laine, a UTI is nothing to sneeze at. Painful urination sucks rocks for sure. I hope it clears up soon for you. Mine is not painful, just really annoying. Accepting I need to wear special underwear even if I don't expect it takes half the stress away. A UTI is painful. I do remember having some as a kid and they were miserable. Hugs to you.
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Laine, I did complete the four letter word set, I’ll post those next.
WARNING
My apologies but if you are sensitive to profanity, please scroll quickly.
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Here you go, lol
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