My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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booboo, I’m late but I too am sorry that the beast is so difficult, it’s hard to exist in this state without clear and promising next steps.
No call from my neuro onc yet with results, her nurse called with routine questions prior to my virtual visit on Wednesday, not sure what to make of the normalcy.
DH and I left Houston at midnight and made a couple stops, we arrived at 11am unloaded and promptly took a nap. I took a daytime and nighttime photo. The lights on the ground are neighbors but a few stars were visible, can’t wait to capture a clear night in all its amazement.
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Lovely view you have to look at Mae. Hope you get info soon.
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absolutely lovely. I’m jealous!
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Beautiful, Mae. So peaceful. The drive, though. I thought my seven-hour drive was bad. I was so uncomfortable.
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I would love to grab a cold ice water and a comfortable chair and sit out on that deck until I couldn’t see a thing anymore. I love porches And decks. I enjoy sitting outside with my. Coffee or a good book. Listen to the wild behind me. I honestly love the view. I know where I would be most often If it wasn’t too hot of course I can’t take the heat. Glad you got a nap in.
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Laurie, I do hope your MO comes up with something to help you through and it’s lovely to see the support and empathy the ladies here provide
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Mae,
Thank you. You are such a precious part of this group, and I am blessed to have met you here. Also I am hoping for good results, so please post whenever you know the outcome.
That view is a killer. We used to go camping when I was a kid, and oh the memories...the best! That view reminds me of all good things outdoors. Hope you get to enjoy it for many years.
Karen,
Me too. I suspect that the antidepressants I am on are no longer working. I’ve been on them for years for anxiety. So I will discuss that with the MO too. She will most likely refer me to a psychiatrist.
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It is so hard to read about someone’s progression or difficulty with treatment as deep in my heart I know that could be me in the blink of an eye. When first diagnosed 35 years ago, my mantra became “the most consistent thing about cancer is that it is inconsistent”. It still holds true today. While I don’t often read beyond the MBC blogs, all of them sure show that this 🤬 disease is the sneakiest bastard around, robbing us of friends and family, robbing us of quality of life.
This group is amazing and while I more frequently just check in rather than post, I pray for all those who accept same, that we can all find peace during this journey that is only compounded by this pernicious Covid. To be able to come here to share good or devastating updates, is a gift. Mel - thanks for starting this and giving us a place to come. To everyone else - thank you for sharing so much. I wish we all shared a little neighborhood, and were only separated by our picket fences. But for now, this virtual neighborhood is the perfect place to set up a home.
Mae - I too love decks. How beautiful is your view! Enjoy☺️
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Like GoldensRBest and others have said, it is really nice to have support here from all of you when we need it, and to be able to offer support to those who may be having a bad day, a bad week, a bad run or whatever. We all know this is a safe space to commiserate about being in the club that no one wants to join.
Hope everyone has a good day.
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I agree with everyone's summary that this is a club that no one wants to join but we got stuck in it. I really do help something can give Laurie better qol, I want less pain whether it is mental, physical or grief to ease up as well.
I am planning to go out since it is sunny and will be warmer today. Going to do a 5K to walmart and get my queso but take the bus home. Not interested in a marathon and this afternoon will probably walk up for a bus pass, not as long a walk would be. Interspersed will be all the usual things, laundry, surveys etc. Not an exciting day but that is fine for me.
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Good evening
Mae the view is fabulous. Wow just wow.
Booboo thanks for checking in.
Back to the pain clinic in the morning for my back. Hopeful for whatever’s new.
Have a good evening all.
Tanya
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Well, the 5 K did not quite workout. Got about 30 mins into the walk and just tired out. Took the bus and still went to dollar tree and walmart for some things. Got extra walking this afternoon to go get a bus pass downtown. Getting there was fine but the road is all ripped up and I had no idea where to get the bus home. Would have been better off struggling to walk but I was tired. Made it and got home, had supper and sat on my butt. I am going to start walking first thing in the morning to make it easier through the day. It was just such a struggle but was happy I got done what I needed too.
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Mara~Glad you’re safe. You definitely have drive my friend. Way to push it. I admire that a lot.
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Thank you Mel, I appreciate. You all have drive as well for what you are all dealing with.
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Mara,
I agree with Mel. You inspired me to go for a walk yesterday with my DH and little Teddi (our Yorkie), and even though it hurt a bit (it’s been awhile since I did anything but sit on my chair), it felt SO good. It really changed my perspective. I am going to go again today, and work up to going everyday. My depression is lifted when I get outside. Thank you, Mara. Your posts really help me to get up and go!
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Mae- Any news yet?
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Laurie, I am glad something I did was helpful to get you outside. Even 5 or 10 minutes outside is beneficial. I started at that after whole brain radiation and I finally started recovering. Glad it was helpful.
I am MAKING myself go out for a walk first thing in the morning after feeding cats. I have also decided that these long distance walks are unncessary. For my level, I only need to be able to do 30 to 40 minutes at a time. No need to try to do 2 hours. It was causing me to be less active. I can also walk to bus stops further away if I should wish too. The only place I feel I NEED to be able to walk to is the hospital for my appointments. Must walk every day though.
I already walked this morning, I am probably going to take a bus to a dollar store, 10 mins walk for the bus and 10 mins walk to walk to the dollar store, I did not like the dollar tree yesterday. Going to see if they have my la totally awesome oxy cleaner there. Exciting stuff.
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Candy, no news yet. I have my virtual follow up at 4:15 today. I’m hopeful that since I received no call this last 3 days, it’s not urgent. Unless, they’ve been discussing a plan this whole time, who knows. Waiting sucks.
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Hello Ladies~ I am reporting for any pocket duty I have lots of snacks and hot chocolate!
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Good morning, here’s a deer in the yard
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Pocket duty Mae. I live in town limits, but just barely. I have deer that come thru my yard all the time. Walk right past my truck in my driveway. Also have squirrels, groundhogs, possums, and skunks.
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Candy, I really enjoy the critters as I assume you do as well. The most interesting to me is the herd of wild donkeys out here, I love seeing them around.
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In your pocket Mae, love hearing about the deer for Mae and Candy and donkeys for Mae. Mae I am strongly hoping that the lack of urgency for the followup is good news. My MO does the same if I have a scan. She knows that I understand that if nothing has been covered for a couple of weeks, means the scan was clear. I worry if i get the call sooner.
Just heading out in this beautiful weather. Am going to Harvey's to stock up on my burgers then Dollar tree and the Freshco grocery store next door for the cats. It will include walking for about 30 mins in total which is good. I am riding the bus though.
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Mae, holding your hand virtually until you get the news.
Mara, I took Teddi again this morning, and the walking soreness is already starting to get better. Who would have thunk it? That I would feel so much better by going for a walk!
I talked to my MO this morning, and we agreed no more Navelbine. She wanted to do all kinds of tests to see what’s going on with my stomach, but I told her no. This was brought on by the drug. She just doesn’t think outside the box much. Anyway, she asked if I’d be willing to contact their palliative care group. I almost fell off my chair. I said yes, yes, yes. I asked her about that several months ago, and unless she didn’t hear me, I would have signed up back then. Oh well. So I’m waiting to hear from her assistant. I’m so excited. This is what I’ve wanted for a long time....ever since you told us how much you get from yours, Mel. Yay!
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BooBoo~yay is right!! I’m so happy finally for you. Talk to them. Explain to them. Get your medical card for topicals and thc helps pain. So glad for you. Yay.
Loving the nature shots. Mae~. Thinking of you! Waving to candy.
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Mel- Waving back.
Mae- Yes I love watching God's little creatures. The groundhogs with their fat little bodies. The deer, so pretty. My cat doesn't get too excited about the deer. He gets more excited about the squirrels and the birds---would taste like fried chicken, is what I tell him about the birds.
Boo- So no treatment for now? Did your MO suggest anything else for the cancer treatment? Weren't you on no treatment earlier in the year? Happy you are going to get in touch with Palliative Care. I just had an appt with mine-- for the first time. I posted a couple pages back ( appt was last Thurs the 29th). I guess each office is different in what they offer. Mine is a Social Worker and a doctor. Some, not mine, offer meditation, Yoga, mental health, acupuncture. We agreed to meet again after my next scans. Not much going on till then. If progression or treatment change, then we will have more to discuss. That is the way I took it, at least. They did give a script for some muscle relaxers to use at night for my back pain/leg spasms. I have not took them yet though. My bad, but I hate taking a new med. Will it make me loopy and I am alone here.
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muscle relaxers will make you loopy yes they certainly will. Be careful with that, you make an excellent point. Safety.
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Laurie, I am so glad to hear you got out this morning again. Every bit you can do helps. I did my harveys pickup, dollar tree and grocery store pickups. Probably half an hour of walking between bus stops and stores. I feel good and not over tired from the walking. Unclear if I will walk again tonight.
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Mel- That is what I fear-- loopy. Getting up in night to go to bathroom (I usually get up twice) and be loopy and fall. I have chronic pain. Use Tylenol. Palliative Care said to try lidocaine patches. But can only use 1 patch at a time, and I have several areas of pain-- low back, hips, shoulder, knees. So, I don't understand how the patches can help with just using on 1 area. But I will try, I guess, so I can say I tried when I talk to them next. The muscle relaxers are for leg spasms associated with the low back pain/issues. But the spasms don't happen every night (thank God). So I would need to use the muscle relaxers when I see it is going to be a bad night with spasms. I have the pills, just need to get up the nerve to take them. So the Palliative Care didn't really help with the pain issues, so far. We will see.
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Candy ~ I have lidocaine ointment. I use it wherever I need relief. Ask about that form. It comes in a tube. It has helped me many times. I’ve even let family members use it for pulled muscles etc. they said it helped. So just a thought instead of patches. They fall off easy.
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