Topic: I look for other flat chested women. A rant.

Forum: Living Without Reconstruction After a Mastectomy — Discuss prostheses, swimsuits, bras, and other options for women not having reconstruction or waiting for reconstruction.

Posted on: Jun 13, 2012 05:39PM - edited Jul 2, 2012 09:56PM by mt1

Posted on: Jun 13, 2012 05:39PM - edited Jul 2, 2012 09:56PM by mt1

mt1 wrote:

I know many of you wear prosthesis, so I probably wouldn't be able to see or 'know', but. I look for you. I want to see you. I want to form a union, lol. I wish it were even more accepted, acceptable to be flat. To not wear prosthesis, not feel the need to, to opt out of reconstruction-if that is your choice. I do hope that women who see me, flat as can be, see there are options, that reconstruction isn't par for the course. I want to make flat beautiful, sexy, stylish. Normal. And it is normal for me, is becoming normal, but I am talking about society, norms and expectations. Breast cancer is not about 'boob jobs'. Yes, many of us opt for them, want and need them. But it is also about choosing to be flat. 

Geez, would I like to meet up with other flat chested women. I would love to take over a hotel, make noise, laugh, cry, be flat together-to see you. I want to meet other women who, like me, have decided not to reconstruct. I want to be able to see you and high five! I want to experience our society of normal.

I was picking up my vegetables from the CSA and a man could not stop looking at my chest, I wanted to yell, 'Breast Cancer did this!! Get it together, man!' I wish all of us would!

Rant complete.

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Nov 15, 2012 10:18PM Starak wrote:

Djustme - At least worth a look around seeing as your silicone is quite small.  A whole industry has sprung up out there making camis and bras with pockets to hold modesty pads.  They are made for women with breasts but I think may be workable for us though in some case with minor modifications.  The pocketed Genie and Ahh bras are prime examples that are typically in the As Seen On TV section of a number of local stores.  But far beyond that, just start looking really closely through the racks in the likes of Walmart, Target and Kohls.  They have become really common not only in regular bras and camis but in the active/exercise areas.  Sometimes you have to look at the back side of the shelf to find the entrance to the pocket.  Look for any reference to removable modesty pads.  I have even run across such things at TJ MAXX or Marshalls.  There is at least one model of the Barely There bras with pockets. 

I have two Amoena Valetta pocketed camis which are made specifically for mastectomy.  I do love mine especially in the heat of summer but are not cheap at around $50 US.

Barbara

Freed 'em when they tried to kill me. BMX, no recon, center dog ears removed, currently living flat but still tending an extensive foob and mx bra experimental farm in the back of the closet.
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Nov 15, 2012 10:26PM lindakr wrote:

The cami's I got are mastecomy cami's and are made Amoena one is Talia style and the other Valietta

Modified Radical MX w/axillary dissection; 6xTCH, Hercpetin for a year, Rads, trying 3rd AI Aromasin. No Reconstruction. Lymphedema. Dx 3/19/2010, IDC, 4cm, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 5/18 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 4/2/2010 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Left) Targeted Therapy 5/15/2010 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 5/15/2010 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Hormonal Therapy 9/15/2010 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane), Femara (letrozole) Radiation Therapy 9/25/2010 Whole breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Nov 15, 2012 11:23PM - edited Nov 15, 2012 11:25PM by erica

I love my Still You camisoles. They're not cheap, but I've had mine for years and wear them almost every day. They are unstructured, kind of like a shelf bra (elastic) with pockets, so all but the smallest, lightest silicone forms won't work (too heavy). I wear mine with the ABC First Forms (memory foam) or with other foam forms. I wind up with very natural-looking shape but no weight and it feels as if I have nothing on, only better because I love the soft feel of the fabric against my skin. 

I can't wear the Amoena camisoles--they just doesn't fit me well or feel comfortable. It's so individual. For me, the Still You camisole is my one indispensable garment.

BreastFree.org (breastfree.org); BreastFree Blog (breastfree.blogspot.com); Twitter @BreastFree
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Nov 15, 2012 11:50PM lindakr wrote:

I'll have to remember that Erica for after my prophylactic MX next spring!  They sound quite comfy!

Modified Radical MX w/axillary dissection; 6xTCH, Hercpetin for a year, Rads, trying 3rd AI Aromasin. No Reconstruction. Lymphedema. Dx 3/19/2010, IDC, 4cm, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 5/18 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 4/2/2010 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Left) Targeted Therapy 5/15/2010 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 5/15/2010 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Hormonal Therapy 9/15/2010 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane), Femara (letrozole) Radiation Therapy 9/25/2010 Whole breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Nov 16, 2012 03:11AM Momine wrote:

Inspired by somebody here, I made a super-easy MX cami the other day. I bought a snug-fitting tank and a cheap bra with molded cups, but no frills. Put on cami, then bra, pinned bra to tank, cut off straps and back, sewed bra to tank, leaving an opening to stick in foobs.

The geni bras did not work for me (bad fit), but I found some cheap jogging bra-like tops, intended for looking cute in yoga class, I think. The fabric is double, so I simply stitch a line center front and cut small openings for the foobs. I use the modesty shields that came with the geni bras for foobs, with a little material glued to the back. They work well, because there is no "edge," especially when they go in the molded bra.

As long as the foobs are relatively small, both of these solutions work perfectly well. I see no reason to suffer with proper bras.

Dx 6/1/2011, ILC, 5cm, Stage IIIB, Grade 2, 7/23 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 6/20/2011 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Ellence (epirubicin), Fluorouracil (5-fluorouracil, 5-FU, Adrucil), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 9/13/2011 Mastectomy: Left, Right Radiation Therapy 1/9/2012 Surgery 3/8/2012 Prophylactic ovary removal Hormonal Therapy 4/1/2012 Femara (letrozole)
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Nov 16, 2012 06:12AM greenfrog wrote:

Happy day today - my referral has come through to see another plastic surgeon about my extremely painful hypertrophic MX scarring. He is not a reconstruction bod - he focuses more on melanomas, sarcomas etc. What a massive relief it will be to have a consultation with someone who is NOT determined to chop my stomach off and sew it to my chest.

Dx 5/2008, IDC, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 3, 0/19 nodes, ER+, HER2-
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Nov 16, 2012 08:06AM Starak wrote:

Greenfrog - this really does sound promising.  YEAHHHHH!!!!!  Do keep us posted.

Barbara

Freed 'em when they tried to kill me. BMX, no recon, center dog ears removed, currently living flat but still tending an extensive foob and mx bra experimental farm in the back of the closet.
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Nov 16, 2012 08:30AM Starak wrote:

Barbara (Erica) - Where do you buy the Still You Cami?  I did not see it on Metro or Park. 

Barbara

Freed 'em when they tried to kill me. BMX, no recon, center dog ears removed, currently living flat but still tending an extensive foob and mx bra experimental farm in the back of the closet.
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Nov 16, 2012 09:39AM Starak wrote:

I have a question regarding a prior discussion of nipples.  I know many of you have husbands or other significant men in your lives and I would even be up to hear what they have to say on the subject.  This came to mind when I was looking around Metro for camis and ran across stick on nipples.  Even had a moment of might be fun to have a pair to stick on breast forms.

When it comes to putting them on a flat chest, my initial knee jerk reaction is that instead of looking like a woman with surgery and scars, that it would really start to look male.  Note that I have never seen a photo of what this might actually look like on real women with flat chests.   I know there was discussion about tattooing nipples at one time.  Has anyone actually done it on a totally flat chest?  Speaking nipples here.  I know some have gone to beautiful elaborate tattoos to cover their scars but that would seem to be different.

Just wondering what you all might think.  Has anyone experimented with the concept on any level?  If you feel comfortable asking men in your life, please share their thoughts.

Barbara

Freed 'em when they tried to kill me. BMX, no recon, center dog ears removed, currently living flat but still tending an extensive foob and mx bra experimental farm in the back of the closet.
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Nov 16, 2012 10:02AM Tina337 wrote:

Barbara, I have seen a pic of both PS created nips and tattooed nips on a non-reconstructed chest, but for the life of me cannot recall where. I had the same feeling you described, that it looked more male than nips covering surgery scars. Others may feel differently, and to each their own. Someone who really misses their nipples might find it reassuring. I have seen those fake nipples and almost ordered them when I had reconstructed, just to see what they would look like. I eventually decided that with my recon problems I wasn't going to bother having another surgery, so I never ordered. I know some of the recon gals have played with them to see how they would look. More expensive ones come in several sizes and colors, but there is a cheaper version that has less options. Made by different manufacturers. I will ask my husband about the tattooing of nips on a flat chest, as I think he would talk about it. I do know after the fact when I had deconstructed that my husband said I looked more like myself flat than I did with implants. I am pretty sure putting fake nipples on them wouldn't have made any difference. Anyway, I will ask him about nips on a flat chest, but I can almost predict his answer.

"Life isn't about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself." ~ George Bernard Shaw Dx 11/13/2007, DCIS, <1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-

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