Illinois ladies facing bc
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Just a quick hello to all and welcome to Christi. (I don't think that I can ever get caught up with the posts-I apologize, but please know that I try to hop on and say hi, and know that I think of you all everyday.) I hope each of you continue to feel good, and those going through treatments and rough times, hugs and positive thoughts to you.
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I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.
-- Agatha Christie0 -
Michele, It's SO GOOD to see a post from you. I miss you! I imagine that you've been busy helping those boys get ready for prom!
Donna, I'm so glad you're through with #2. Just mark it off nice and bold on your calendar. I always found that gave me a special sense of satisfaction!
Thinking of you, buddy and hoping that all went well for you yesterday.
Jackie, is the sun shining down south or are you getting more rain, too? I'm like you and Laura. I need the sun to perk me up! I think I've always been a sunshine gal and a warm-weather person.
Jan, are you back yet from vacation? I hope you had a great time!
Blackjack...how are you doing? It won't be long now and we'll be heading for Vegas. We're staying at the Flamingo....mainly because we got a complimentary room there and I do like the location. Can't beat those comps!!!
Wendy...I was going to hunt for more plants today but I think the rain is putting a damper on those plans. I am meeting with a newly diagnosed gal at Borders this afternoon for coffee and a talk. Let's hope I can find the right words to help her as she struggles to "grasp" this diagnosis and make her decisions. I don't think I'll drive up there with the top down! LOL
Connie, I can't tell you how many times I felt those "growing up pains" over the years......the first day of kindergarten, sixth grade graduation, junior high dances, the first day of high school, prom, the Eagle Scout Celebration, the first high school golf match...and the list goes on and on. Each time it tore at me a little bit more but my love and pride matched the bittersweet milestones. You've realized already how fast these years go, so just continue to enjoy those kids. You will have so many memories when those days have passed and so will your kids! They are lucky to have such a great Mom!
elfsong....I hope your hubby finds out soon if he does have the job. It's pretty stressful when you're in limbo and don't really know what's going to happen.
Well, I need to get moving. I'll be back later. Everyone have a good day!
Rita
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Rain, Rain, go away
Come again in three years, ok.
Guess I'll get by but it's too many gray wet days. I'll be in working today so maybe it won't seem so bad. See you when I get off work.
Hugs,
Jackie
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I am with IllinoisLady...Rain, Rain, go away! How the heck are you supposed to get over the flu with this kind of weather coming down on you. Ugh.....
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Hope Buddy's doing okay.
WHERE'S WENDREW! I know you're not outside gardening! This weather - boo hoo!
Connie - Would love to see the Com Dress... I made my niece's Com dress... it was a TON of work... but it turned out really well.
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Keep dry and warm today!
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Illinois Ladies-
Sitting in hospital, had my BLM w/ sentinal lobe removal. Surgery pain is getting easier and easier but I found out that 1 of 2 lymphnodes tested positibe. I know feel like i'm going to puke, I'm so scared. Should I be scared? What does this mean for my longterm outcome? Did any of you have the same prognosis
jo
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Hi Jo...I would not be hitting the panic button any time soon. I think there will be a pathology report which will go into detail.....exactly what was seen in the one lymph node --- how extensive or not etc. Many, many people have lots of lymph nodes removed and end up doing fine. This is a terror-filled time and it takes very little to get your attention. In fact, much of what you are going through now tends to seem negative as your cancer is being dissected.
All of this tells you where you are, and what other steps it is possible to take. Though it will be one of the most difficult things you have ever tried to do, relax as much as you can, think of all the positive things you can and visualize your own health returning to you. I think so many of us have learned that everything sounds desperate and frightening at this point. Yet, we are all here to comfort you and hold your hand because so often what may sound like the dickens turns out to be not so bad after all.
Rest and try not to worry ( great advice huh !!! when your the one lying there and I'm here ) because until the report comes back...no one really knows. If it will put your mind at rest, it does not sound bad at all to me, but I am not a Dr. And I did not have lymph node involvement.....just two different cancer tumors in one breast....one large, one small....but I am here minus three lymph nodes anyway. I will be sending healing hugs and thoughts to you and visualizing a "good" path report with viable solutions for anything there.
Blessings Jo.....just keeping taking deep breaths and know you have many people here caring and praying you will do as well as we have.
Love, strength and big hugs,
Jackie
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First - a belated welcome to Christi! Glad you found us...
JACKIE - WOW - Jackie - your post to Jo - couldn't have said it better.
Jo - I would like to add... my Sent Node was positive... at the time, I FREAKED... but like Jackie said... there's many girls here with more nodes positive - and they're doing really well. I was dx'd in July of 2005...bilat masts., chemo, rads, etc. I am doing great! But I TOTALLY understand the fear of having even 1 node positive. Try to not let it get the best of you. Hang in there... try to concentrate on healing... you've been through ALOT! We're here for you... and I'm sure others will chime in... don't over do it... don't do too much, too soon.... let your body heal. Take it easy... best wishes...
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Jo...MamaQ....I sent you a PM and lots of hugs and good vibes!
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Jackie, Laura & Rita-
Thanks so much for the words of wisdom. You actually calmed my nerves a little. I am just so scared, I want to see my children grow old.
Thanks-
Jo
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Jo - You must remain positive....I know that's a diffuclt thing right now... surround yourself with positive things... AGAIN... you have been through ALOT... but please... think of this as one chapter of your life.... the chapters that will follow will be better. I KNOW this is hard to digest... but that's what we're here for... to help you through this chapter. Hang in there...
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Hi everyone,
Just popping in...I have been so ridiculously busy and I'm SO behind on posts. Please know I'm following and thinking of you all though.
Jo- you will find much wonderful advice and support here--- that's what I accidentally stumbled into and why I stay. These ladies are all amazing.
I saw a GI specialist today...it's time to look closer at what may be causing my long standing iron deficient anemia. There is also a growing concern about connection btw breast and colon cancer. That she recommended a colonoscopy is not surprise, but she is also recommending an endoscopy- which was. Can I tell you I think I am more scared about these tests than all my breast surgeries and tests combined..... I won't bore you with all the details---- heh- I was going to joke about starting/finding a Colonscopy.org--- but there actually really IS one. I'm terrified of the prep, the procedures themselves, but most of all what might be found. Haven't even scheduled the test, but know I'm in for a big cry tonight. Would anyone believe that I actually was once, pre-bc, a calm rational person? Heh-- that's what one of my reviews at work once said-- "Handles crisis situations calmly and carefully." Guess that person is gone gone.
Enough whining. Stinky kids to get in the shower. How does a 6 year old get so stinky in just a day! Maybe they will let me sing this time. (Am told to stop lately)
-julie b
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THANKS FOR THE HELP.
LAURA- I LOOK AT HOW HEALTHY YOU LOOK IN YOUR PICTURES AND THAT KEEPS ME POSITIVE.
JULIE- I DEFINATELY WILL COME HER FOR SHOULDERS TO LEAN ON.
JO
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Oh, Julie ((((hugs)))- I'm sorry to hear of your continuing health tests. Hopefully, everything will be okay.
Jo- big (((hugs))) to you as well. I hope it will help to know that I was 4 positive nodes out of 17 taken- AND that was after dose dense chemo. I did the chemo, had the surgery, then radiation. It's over 2 years now and I'm feeling very, very well. Everything looks clean.
Praying that everything went well for Buddy1.
I'm sorry that I've not been around much- two jobs (and the unofficial "3rd" of the house addition) just seem to take all my time. I'm going to try and post more, but they will probably be short and sweet.
I just want to say that I care for you all- and especially want to wish the best to those currently in treatment!
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JANCLARE-
THANKS FOR SHARING YOUR STORY. IT HELPS TO KNOW THAT OTHERS HAVE GOTTEN THROUGH IT.
JO
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Another rainy day.. I am tired from radiation and herceptin.. took a little nap and here I am at night again..
I hope Buddy feels better today..
Jo- do not worry too much it's gonna make you feel bad and sad.. so, think positive and be strong for yourself.. When I heard that one of node got positive, I cried but that didn't stop me.. I just move forward with my treatment.. I finished my chemo little over 2 month ago and I am doing radiation (2more weeks to go).. You will get through this and if you need shoulders to lean on, you know where to go~! hug~~~
Julieb- don't we all hate to do more tests and it makes you wonder how the result will be this time.. I hope everything will be ok..
Donna- how are you?? I hope you are resting..
It's time for bed, Ladies, sweet dreams~! talk to you all later~!~!
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ELFSONG-
THANKS FOR THE WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT. I WILL TRY TO STAY POSITIVE, JUST GET SO HARD TO DO IT SOMETIMES. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? WHAT DID YOU TELL THEM. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO BE STRONG FOR THEM IF I'M NOT SO SURE MYSELF.
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Jo...sorry I didn't see your post sooner....
Getting news of positive lymph nodes is scary so you are feeling normal. But remember...it is those exact nodes that are SUPPOSED to capture the cancer cells BEFORE they can travel elsewhere. And yours did exactly what they were supposed to do - stopped the cancer cells. Many girls do just fine and go on to live long, happy and healthy lives with no return of cancer altho they had positive nodes. Hang on, honey. We will be around to always listen to your fears and anxieties...but for right now, concentrate on recovering from surgery. You need your strength for that ... we can worry for you for the next few days, so give it all over to us. The cavalry has arrived!!!!!!
Please let us know how we can help - as this is what this thread was founded for, for positive, healing, loving support - and nothing else.
Hugs, honey! Remember, IL gals are TOUGH - and you are one of us!
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Hi !! Sooo sick today and slept terrible.. this second tx is defintley not like the first. Want to know how Buddy is and hope today she will update. For now, goin to rest today and lay low. Thanks all for being here.
Hugs;
Donna
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No time for anything but the quote this a.m.....late for work. Talk more tonight.
Those who contemplate the beauty of the earth find reserves
of strength that will endure as long as life lasts. There is a
symbolic as well as actual beauty in the migration of the birds,
the ebb and flow of the tides, the folded bud ready for the spring.
There is something infinitely healing in the repeated refrains of
nature-the assurance that dawn comes after night, and spring
after the winter. The lasting pleasures of contact with the natural
world...are available to anyone who will place himself under the
influence of earth, sea and sky and their amazing life.
- Rachel Carson (1907-1964)0 -
Donna....if it's nausea, call and ask for something! You might need something stronger to take. PLEASE don't sit and home and feel miserable....there are drugs to alleviate most if not all the nausea. As for sleep - ask for a sleeping pill. I took ativan during each chemo round, not because I was sick but just to shut off my mind. This is the time you need to pick up the phone and tell them that you need to feel better and what can they give you. If they blow you off, stand your ground. There is NO reason for you to be sick and without sleep. I hope you are feeling better soon....
I need a laundry fairy!
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Donna, what day are you in? I always felt terrible days 3 and 4 and even 5 and then, like a miracle, it lifted. I remember being in bed on the fifth day and then realizing....it was passing and I should get up. I know it is hard (especially om this weather) but try to walk. I always felt better when I forced myself to move. Like Wendy says, they do have meds for nausea, which I never experienced. I just experienced overall raunchiness and there are not too many pills to cure that.
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A quickie here at work. Julie...it is difficult isn't it. I'm sure I would have major reluctance as who wants to have to get into anything else requiring lots of tests and time, and maybe meds. You have come so far and just want to relax and not spend so much time on health. I hope it all goes smooth ( if I can put it that way ) and that you are able to get to a point where you can feel some "health" freedom for a change.
Buddy....huge prayers and visual healing thoughts coming to spend time with you.
Donna...Wendy is so right.....you need your rest and sleep so much right now and your general comfort. Please do ask for medications to ensure this. The chemo is cumulative and you seem to be showing a lot of change and this is only the second one. I was not smart enough to demand other meds or more help but you will do so much better if you do. You are on a hard road sweets so do ask asap for what may make a big difference for you.
Jo, hope you are a bit more comfortable about things this afternoon. My kids are grown, but my feeling is honesty is the best policy---tailored to their age of course. I think if you have a positive attitude anytime you tell them anything they will be more inclined to accept things as they are...that you are indeed ill but that you are doing everything you can to get well. If it's consolation...it was hard to tell my adult children.
So many answers on your path report and while a bit early there is a spot in here that will help you read your path report so you won't have to be confused about anything. I got a copy of mine and no one to tell me what it all meant....you may have someone to give you some guidance with that....but nice the spot is here as you can go back over the report later and re clarify.
See you all later.
Hugs,
Jackie
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Hi girls!
Thanks for your insights on kids growing up. I will post a picture of my DD in her dress as soon as possible.
Jo - I had one positive node and 11 clean ones. My tumor was really large so my surgeon was very happy with those results. As Jackie stated - wait for the path report and you should know more. It is a very frightening time, but we are all hear for you.
Good to hear from you Jan Clare! Glad you are doing well.
Julie - thinking of you and your tests. You know we all understand the fear.
Donna - hope you feel better. I took Zofran and never had any nausea as long as I took it regularly.
It's been crazy at work as we put together our swine flu action plan. We have to be prepared in case we have a lot of workers out sick or home with kids. Crazy!
Have a great weekend!
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Hi all.. slept most of day and actually my stomach is better. I even took my Lorazapam last night and i was like hallucintating or dreaming so weird and kept waking up.Usually i get good sleep with that med. I may take a Ambien CR tonight.. I am better and will lay low as this is day three and expect bad times until day 6-7. Promise to be sure i do not get worse and not call the DR if need to.Thanks for being there. This really is a rough journey and am usually not a complainer.
Worried on Buddy!
Be well and thank you ALL!!!!
Donna
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I keep checking in because I am also wondering about Buddy. Funny how we start worrying about people we have never even met in REAL life. Well, acually this is real life..cannot get any more real than this.I think maybe it is too soon to worry.
Donna, the dreams are what I experienced as well. They say the chemo does not cross into the brain, but I find that hard to believe. How could we have chemo brain it didn't reach the brain? I understand when you use the word "hallucination-like" as that is the perfect word. I hated it You wake up feeling like hell because your dreams have put you through the wringer. I have trouble in the bad dream area to begin with (my DH says it is because I have such a lively imagination
). Imaginiation is a wonderful thing when you are awake; but a lousy thing when you are sleeping and without the control to stop it. Are you keeping water and foods down?Susan
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WENDY THANKS FOR THE CALVARY CHARGE. IT'S NICE TO HAVE PEOPLE AROUND WHO UNDERSTAND.
JACKIE- THANKS FOR ADVICE. I TRY TO ALWAYS BE HONEST (AGE APPROPRIATELY) WITH THE KIDS. I ACTUALLY HAD WHEN PEOPLE DON'T TELL ME THINGS STRAIGHT, SO I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT TO THEM.
CONNIE- THANKS FOR SHARING, TOO. I WILL TRY TO STAY POSITIVE BUT IS KIND OF HARD. I FEEL A LITTLE BETTER NOW THAT I'M AT HOME. NOTHING LIKE THE KIDS FIGHTING TO MAKE YOU FEEL NORMAL AGAIN.
DONNA- I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER SOON.
JO
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Good Evening Girls....just wanted to stop by and let you all know that I am still dealing with the esophagus/ stomach issues. I had my cat scan done today of my chest and abdomen and had a small reaction even with the pre meds I took. I spent half of my day in a fog. Oh well.. this too shall pass. I hope you all will forgive me for not emailing about the lunch bunch. Laura thank you for posting it. I hope you all can come.. we do have lot of laughs and good food to eat. So save the date..email me if you can come as I will try to get the private room. Then you all can get wild and crazy....lol
There Is so much chatter here that I need to catch up on. To all the new girls welcome and I hope you come back often. To the one's in treatment Buddy / Donna I hope you are resting.
To everyone else I hope you are living life to the fullest..enjoying everyday with the one's you love.
Just wanted to check in...need to go rest now...jammie time. I hope this fog lifts by tomorrow as I am not liking this feeling. Have a good evening...Hugs to all
Remember to be healthy...be happy
Blackjack
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Morning everyone
I am a happy camper....there is sun here and I'm hoping it lasts the day. Oh please. Jo....great that you are home. Well, they don't keep you in the hospital like they used to anymore. Probably a good thing as there are so many BAD germs there...for sure. Hope you will keep posting when you have time. We try our best to help or to just be a comfort by listening when you feel the need to vent about something.
Donna, I bet you are laying very low as there are those days when almost everything takes too much effort and I know you are there. Hugs to you.
Buddy.....hope all is well with you.....you are a real fighter and we are sending healing hugs and lots of healing energies to you.
Bj, how great to see a post from you too. I was about to send out he Saint Bernard's looking for you....with cosmo's in their neck canteens, but now I don't have too. Hate that you are still having to deal with the stomach/esophagus issues. Hopefully, soon......like no later than Monday.
Hope you all have a pleasant day.....a little sun if possible. Dry too.
Hugs,
Jackie
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