Im bitchy, I moan, I groan.....anyway.
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OMG - Since when does the big C discriminate??? Friggin babies get it!!
Joy - that girl was an ass - and should be reported - great job of lifting your shirt - I would have decked her!!
Valerie
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Chantal,
I am so horrified by your treatment today. Damn. I'm speechless.
Huge, giant hugs to you.
Bren
PS - Traci ... can we get the picture of the lady punching the other one here please!!
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Maybe there needs to be a new T-shirt design.
T-shirt any color, but with words
* * *
RAD MAST
FIELD ZONE
* * *or* * *RECON UNDERCONSTRUCTIONZONE* * *The stars are the rad tats. The blue dots. At least they could have used brown dye - to look like moles. I actually asked for some other color but was told blue dye was so any future doctors would know where the rad fields were. Already forcasting recurrence. What a group.0 -
LOL! HannaB0 -
i love this thread and thank you traci for starting it.
i was dx 2006 october, i was told it was stage 1 then
after lumpoctemy went to stage 3 with 4/28 postive
nodes, then the margins were positive and i had to
have a second operation. i made it thru chemo, radiation,
fought tooth and nail to keep my job, i work in nyc in the beauty industry and they were trying to fire me, i'm single so you can
imagine how scary that was while going thru this, i gained 25pounds
i went from (sorry don't want to sound conceided) but i was a beautiful, slim, dynamic, enegetic women, now i'm a frumpy looking, i have 4 inches of hair which is very thin, i used to have long beautiful hair, long eyelashes and thick dark eyebrows, the eyelashes are half the length and the eyebrows are so light and it's been one year since the last chemo.
While i was doing chemo, i too wanted to kill someone, not that i would do it, but i would go into rages, especially after the ac chemo, my hormones were raging, once i started the taxol everything seemed to calm down, but i too was sick and tired of everyone looking on the bright side. Even though it's been one year and i am so thankful to be here and healthy again, i'm still mad as hell, some days it's better than others, but overall i yearn for my old self, my beautiful long hair, my slender body and most of all my passion and energy. i've been put into menopause by chemo, so i feel numb, i've also been struggling for months to lose the 25pounds that i gained, now i've started a very intensive workout, 30 minutes jogging, pilates and yoga daily as well as 1200 cals a day, i've always been a very healthy good eater, but now i can barely eat one sunflower seed without gaining weight, it's so f.....g depressing i want to scream, i can't even look in the mirror and i've been wearing lounge pants all winter, i lost my job right before christmas the lousy f....g place that i worked at despartely wanted me out because i did not suit their image any longer, so the one mistake i made they terminated me, so here i am single, 43, fat, no job, i work in the fashion industry and i can't even get a job because it's all based on image. anyway i go day by day, i bought new outfits, i have an interview on thursday so we shall see if the universe will finally give me some joy!
take care everyone, and first and foremost say what you feel always and health, peace and joy to all!
franca
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Franca,
Take away the stage 1, fashion industry, delete 2 1/2 inches of hair, add 5 months to the dx and yours was my post!
oh and....I haven't bought any new clothing since '06.
" Here you go.: - ) Traci
ps I haven't started my taxes yet. I ate three tostadoes instead.
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uh oh....forget the "started exercise" part too.
yea, no....I haven't done that yet.0 -
thanks for the video i love it, i am pretending that's the women who fired me........i'm stage 3a by the way. the a....e doctors first told me i was stage 1. you too soon will have a muffin top hair do like mine, it's truly the ugliest haircut ever!!! i'd rather be eating a tub of ben and jerrys than exercising.
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I saw your stage 3 .....sucks.....but was referencing the initial dream (not) of being told stage 1. SUCKS!!!
Damn it Brooklyn....you just reminded me I have Cherry Garcia Ben & Jerry's in my freezer......................................................
2000 calories here I come!!!!
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Hi All,
Vicky, can you switch to all electric? We had gas heat with the big tank in the backyard. About 9 years ago, fuel started going up and it was costing us $200 a month for gas and about $125 for electrity. We were all electric except for heat. We bought an electric heat pump and now we pay about $175 a month. Of course, electricity went up so now our electric bill is about $215 for cold months. and $175 in warm months and about $150 during spring and fall. I don't think heat pumps work well if you stay below 42 degrees for much though.
Moving down south is great. The cost of living is cheaper here. Of course so are some of the wages. Depending on what you do.
Joykeeper, what a dip. How do they get heartless people to volunteer. She must have been pushed into it. I have read many stores about women in their 20's getting BC. Hope they never let her come back.
Franca, I have decided to wait until the effects of chemo wear off before I go back to working out and WW. I can eat like a pig, loose 4 lbs and then not eat for 3 days and gain 5??????. I am not able to work out due to the fatigue and swelling. I normally did aerobics and weights 4 x week. 2 x a week I did yoga. I had tried to get back to my routine (modified) and I was gaining weight like crazy 20lb in 6 weeks. I was working out and doing WW. I gave up. Then the fatigue and breathlessness took over. So f**k it. I eat when I can. I have lost 10 lbs. and need 10lb of chemo weight and 10 more lbs to my goal weight. I'll get there.
Question ladies, my hair is starting to come back. I have about 1/4" on the sides but very little on the top. Please tell me I am not going to be the one who has permanent hair loss from Taxotere???? I got every SE exept one. My nails did not fall off (YET) Prior to chemo, I had very thick hair. I lost my hair in 1986 from chemo and it came back. I have a little on top but it is sparse compared to the sides. Do the sides grow back in first? I don't remember. Anyone have this happen and still get a full head of hair? This sucks! Oh, and it is all gray! I don't think I was all grey before.
Debbie
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newvickie, the heating oil thing does truly suck, and the new poster from NY, I totally sympathize with the 25 lbs - mine FLEW on, it's shocking to me, I cry when I see the mirrors at the gym, but all I think the prize for the day goes to:
joykeeperorg! from one "young" survivor to another, your day takes the cake. the nerve of that volunteer! the image of you lifting your shirt will stay forever in my mind!
and that poor youngster, bet that's a lesson she'll never forget. let's hope she's a much better human being for it; what a way for a naive kid to learn not to make huge assumptions. And not to be RUDE. My word, how inappropriate.
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Franca, it totally sucks getting fired... I hate those people for you!
The pounds flew on to me, too, when I started aromasin -- but I was not skinny to begin with!
Chantal, that really takes my breath away -- and as everyone has said, the volunteer training at Susan G. Komen in SA must really suck...
I'm proud of you for lifting your shirt, but the fact that you had to is appalling.
((((hugs))))
and heating oil prices --
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dhettish-i ended my treatments one year ago and only now do i finally have the energy to start excercising in a vigorous way, a year ago i got back into it by doing 2 yoga classes a week and jogging twich a week but it was too much for me and would wipe me out.
take your time and your body will tell you when it's ready. good to hear that you lost weight. i have lost nothing but my mind freaking out about the weight, i used to be slim and i hate being fat!!! but i hope and pray that this regiment works.
annnyc-thanks for hating those people, i will always hate them, especially since they are a spa company and supposedly providing the service of well being and this is how they treat people, i battle bc for 8 months went back to work, worked my ass off because they had me doing the job of two people, and the one mistake i made, they fired me, it really made me lose alot of faith in humanity, how could they treat someone like this. oh well i'm just glad to be out of that negative dark hole. but not happy to be unemployed and fat!!!
thanks take care.
franca
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dhettish-i forgot to mention when my hair grew back, the sides took forever, the top came in faster, i too was going crazy thinking i would be one of the ones that would be bald for life, but it came in, i now have top heavy and sides still a little less, but i do have four inches and it is evening out, mine came back mousy dark ugly elephant grey color, i weighed as much as one and had the hair to match, as soon as i had 1/2 of hair i went and got it colored and then i felt great!! i go to aveda they use 97% natural and very gentle peroxide, it's important to use as little chemicals as possible on our bodies.
all the best and good hair growth.
franca
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My bitch is that Im too old to pull and all nighter. Partied all night for the first time in years - and Im going back to bed.
Debbie: Its funny about hair growth. I was on taxotere. Everyones grows back different. My was very slow coming back. It started in the back and actually on side grew faster than the other. I have a widows peak and my crown was the last to come in.
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I have nothing in particular to moan about today, except that hubby knows I want to clean up the house before the babysitter comes and yet he is lying on the couch watching a video. He doesn't think cleaning is important or that I should try to hide our true (slob) colors whenever someone comes over. I'm not cleaning anything right now myself becuase I don't have the energy. But I'll find it in the next few minutes and then I'll feel resentful toward him as we leave on our "date" that I arranged.
I don't know what I want clearly enough to ask for it. I don't know why I feel like crying or why I feel paralzyed. I don't know how to get out of these funks that are coming more frequently now that the novelty of a cancer diagnosis is wearing off. I have some pills to help me sleep, but what I really need is a stimulant to help me get off my self-pitying a*** and get some things done.
It helps to come here and read others' complaints and the dark humor is better than the pep talks I tend to get elsewhere. Thanks for this thread. I haven't read every story yet but I'm glad to find you all.
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Tracie, I love this thread, when I need a pick me up I come here. thanks ladies for bitches. heather
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I have some pills to help me sleep, but what I really need is a stimulant to help me get off my self-pitying a*** and get some things done.
No, dear 1965sally, what you need is a cattle-prod to apply to the posterior of a certain someone whose priority seems to be assuming a supine position on the couch and reveling in slobbitude.
That SUCKS!
Lisa
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((joykeeper)) sorry you had to endure that, but loved the way you handled it! That girl will think long and hard before she makes assumptions again.
((Sally)) I hear you girl! My dh (and I don't mean darling) has been laying on the couch for 2 days! I'm trying to get everything ready because I'm having surgery on Wed and he is just oblivious to it.
Then today my tooth fell out. It's one that had a root canal previously and now the whole crown, tooth and rods just fell out. I fell apart and all my dh could say is "it's just a tooth."
I've got a mast w/tram in 2 days. . .this is the last thing I needed. Hopefully I can work in a visit to the dentist before surgery and since it was a root canal tooth, I don't think it will start hurting and maybe fixing it can wait until I recover.
Since I lost my job last year, I don't have dental ins anymore so this is just added to the medical bills I'm getting ready to incur. . .excuse me, it's a lot more than "just a tooth."
((Traci)) love this thread and I crack up everytime I see that bitch slap video!
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hi traci,
i hope the ben and gerrys and tostadoes were good!!! i'm sooo hungry right now, but know if i indulge i'll regret it tomorrow, i'm finally getting out of my lounge pants, i just bought new clothes, i've gone up 2 sizes.
can i just say, i'm so sick of all the cancer commercials and programs, there is one on right now for breast cancer, it's so sad that
cancer is a business!!!! also there was a stupid f...ng show on last year called crazy sexy cancer, why would anyone call cancer sexy!!! ugggghhh it makes me want to scream!
no bluesky today, just darkness....((
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Hey Lisa and Sheila, thanks!
We just went out to a movie and I thought "this is good, I'm enjoying this" - just before they started killing everyone. So I came out as moody as I went in.
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That really sucks, Sheila, your tooth falling out! I had a water pipe leak underground somewhere, but at least someone else can deal with that. No one else can go to the dentist for you. Hope it doesn't become too much of a hassle.
Bluesky, I didn't see any blue sky today either. I'm so glad it's getting close to bedtime and I can start over tomorrow.
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Hi Traci and everyone here. Traci , thanks so much for starting this thread! I'm mostly a positive person , but since being dx'd Feb. 07 , life has sucked thanks to bc! I was going to post earlier , but I was busy getting ready for a trip to Tenn (Hi Debbie in Tn! I was in McMinnville) to visit my mom and sis and her kids for Easter.
I read back through the posts I missed while I was gone. I just wanted to give everyone a big , THAT SUCKS!!! People around us seem to think everything is fine and we should be over bc. They just don't get it. And some people are just down right rude! Thanks also Traci for the bitch-slap video! Only , I am going crazy wondering what that was all about!lol OK , heres my bitch. I have a few;
I will never be the same again since getting bc. I hate the "new normal" I mourn the loss of my "old self". My recon is uncomfortable , bigger than my other , I can only wear sports bras , because of the difference in size. Sure , I got a tummy tuck with diep , but my mid-dreft is still the same size , oh make that bigger , since the weight gain , and I now am dis-proportioned nothing femine about my shape anymore. And Soooooo embarassing is the fact my pubic area is huge since recon. I have to wear pants that our loose in the crotch so no one can see my "hippo lips"!
And then there is the loss of friends who just disappeared when I was dx'd. One friend particular , I had known for 30 years , she is a nurse and her sister had bc. Her and I actually went together for our mammos. We both got call back letters. She was OK , I wasn't. To much for her to handle? She should try being the one that it is happening to.
But my biggest bitch is hotflashes. I am on tamox. and in the beginning I was having them hourly! My onc finally gave me effexor. I had a good month where I only had flushes , then boom they came back. Can you say "spontaneous combustion"!? Sometimes I feel like I will burst into flames. And then I sweat and sweat and sweat! My hair gets wet , like I just had a shower. My face turns red and my chest , then I start getting "mountain dew"(sweaty boobs) and then I itch everywhere. So my onc told me to start taking two effexors per day. Which I just started tonight. Please pray that it helps. It is so uncomfortable and embarrassing , especially when its happening and those wonderful people who notice say , OH MY GOD , WHATS WRONG WITH YOU!? Thats when I sooo much need that bitch-slap video!!
OK , well back to work tomorrow. So I better get to bed. Thanks so much for letting me bitch and moan. I really needed that! Bitch-slappin' hugs to everyone!lol Oh , here is a coupon for everyone ,
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Hang in there Mel - hope uping the effexor helps!! And thanks for free card - I'm sure it will come in handy.
Valerie
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My bitch is total new posters with no or very few posts just popping up out of nowhere trying to get tips on pic forum entry. I know most everyone here can spot them, but still....
Just a general bitch....I hate pervs.
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LMAO!
I'm glad I started this thread too!!
Does anybody else have it going to their email? I do and every once in awhile a bitch will pop up that although normally has the SUCK aspect to it....almost always has something funny!
I try not to post during the day cuz I'm suppose to be working but honeygirls post had me lol and I had to see the coupon! Hilarious!!
However, the suck aspect of your post Honeygirl...my 'lil sis just had a tram flap and has the same prob with her pubic area! especially 'above' it. It is still totally swollen. That sucks girl. She also has what she calls 'dog ears' from the ends of her tummy scar sticking out.
Lisa...cattle prod! LOL!!
I'll catch up later!!
Hugs, Traci
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I can't stop laughing at honeygirl's "hippo lips" and now I can't remember my bitch.
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I don't know how to get out of these funks that are coming more frequently now that the novelty of a cancer diagnosis is wearing off.
Hi Sally, I feel your pain. What was the movie you saw? That totally sucks that it didn't lift you up. You need to go see a comedy next time!
Sam, you got a lot on your plate and it's Not just a tooth
Honeygirl, have you tried the Neurotin for the hotflashes? It doesn't get rid of them entirely but may cut down the number of them and the intensity. That Sucks about the "hippo lips"! Thanks for the Bitch Slap Coupon. I'm going to make copies so I can use it over and over!
HannaB, Huh? Where are these frauds posting? I'm a bit slow today ... lol I Hate frauds, they Suck!
GSG ... LOL
Traci, how's the roommate lately? We can thank her at least for your inspiration to start this great thread!!
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editing to delete duplicate post ... hmmm
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honey girl-try inositol 10 grams per day and 5-htp 300mg per day, these are alternative supplements and have greatly helped me with hot flashes, i rarely get them now and it's been one year since on the tamox.
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