Stop Smoking Support Thread
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Sure love my BCBK sisters.
Janet, loved the joke...got to remember that next time I am in the hospital.
KK69Z: CONGRATULATIONS! One year, that is awesome!!
I love nature and today watching the hummingbirds has been a pure kick. There has been 3-4 depending on the moment having their battles over the feeders. Crazy because there are 2 feeders and 8 spots to eat...guess they don't share.
Have a wonderful evening~~~HUGS,
Nadine
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Hello BCBK wenches!
My wish is that all can have a good, sound night's sleep. You all keep me going and I just love you bunches. Hugs and slarpy kisses!
Nancy, Pat, Susan
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Hi ladies, my little sausage update.
She's going to be spoiled!
Have a good night!
Janet0 -
Oh!!! She's adorable and looks so alert. Give her bunches of kisses from me!
NPS
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What a beautiful baby. Give her kisses from from me also...darn now I want one. Second thought no potty training...you enjoy Janet.
Cooled down finally for a couple days and finally a little rain...nice and cool and making me sleepy so off to dream land I go. GN to everyone. Sweet dreams to everyone.
Nadine
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I went and did...had the kids buzz my hair! I actually like it better then the old haircut! At least now I don't have to try to style it . I'll change my avatar once my face and chest clears up...apparently my body is trying to expel toxins out through my skin as well and I have broke out in a splotchy pimple like rash on my face and chest...my nose area is especially tender and irritated.
Kids started school this week and it has been crazy. Chemo brain has already started...sent my son off to high school on Wednesday, no lunch, no lunch money and then went off to my onc appointment for my Herceptin Treatment. Here I am plugged into an IV 30 minutes away and my son is starving during his lunch break (ok a little over dramatic but I REALLY felt like a bad mom).
I had to go back through and re-read the last few pages of posts...there has been so much going on it's hard to address everyone...
Flfish - I have been having my own little pity party/blue week...chemo has been relatively ‘easy' with mild SE's but it still sucks...so here I am at my onc appt this week and it is a full house! Three people to room all getting their own special cocktails. My roommates were Stage 4 BC and Late stage colon cancer...of course now I feel like an ungrateful wench because I have it so ‘easy'... I HATE THIS DISEASE!!! I feel guilty for feeling good, I feel guilty for feeling bad...I am not even catholic and I have a bad case of catholic guilt.
So happy to have you back Pantafus! You have such a way of cutting through all the BS and telling like it is!!! I agree 200% - I have been thinking of you daily and I am sending lots of speedy healing vibes your way!!!
Nadine - That sucks about your hubby's boss and the insurance!!! I was laid off about a month before dx and my job was covering me and the kids...lucky I am eligible for the Obama Cobra subsidy until Dec 09 but then I'll have to pay full price for medical for 12 months and its off to find other coverage... There is a Patient Advocate site that offers help with insurance and healthcare access problems - here is the link http://www.patientadvocate.org/ I hope it helps! On the non-smoking front...WAY TO GO!!! I am so proud of you for staying strong especially with the added stress of all the above going on.
Kk69z - thank you for the encouragement...I love your analogies and I sure don't need friends like that!!
Janzin - Love the black background website...it is classy and can be spiced up with a rainbow of colors...we are a colorful group, maybe that is why it is so hard to ‘pick' a color! Also love the "Walk for the living" concept. I have felt like poor 'Norma Findlay Room 302.' So many times in the last few months...I'll have to remember this joke next time I am left in the dark...
I know I am forgetting everyone but it has already taken me an hour to write this lovely ditty and my meds are kicking in...I hope everyone has a restful night and sweet dreams!
Lots of love!
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Janiz - what a cutie...she is going to be spoiled but that's how it should be
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OH Janzin he is to cute, reminds me of the little rascals dog think his name was spot? But she looks like a Dutchess or Princess, Mayvis, Is she going to be big? if NOt Frisky,Spunky. Ok I am trying to remind myself of a my favorite puppies I had when I was a non smoker. decades ago.
Cute Joke too
speaking of ranting and venting I kinda directed that at my onoco and PS this week. I am getting so tired of being told not to worry about my exchange surgery on the 11th. But today I was about to leave after my final presurgery fill and than I said to the nurse ok .. What implants are you putting in? Size , style. I shocked the S@@t out of her. She went and got the PS and he started going over things with me. The DRs all week have been asking me what's going on becasue I am usually so mild and just go along. I never told them I quit smoking because they assumed I had months ago.
But I am not smoking - just over thinking everything.
Congrats on your 1st year anniversary.... that fantastic
Have a peaceful nights sleep.
Malle
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Good for you Malle...It's hard to be assertive and demand answers from your doc's when they have, for the most part, been busy saving your life...I am not one to rock the boat and sometimes leave appointments feeling frustrated at myself... Yea for you on not smoking!!!!
When is your exchange surgery?
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Good for you Malle. These doctor's are NOT gods, even though they tend to act like it. Remember that you are paying them and you deserve answers. This is their job, but this is YOUR body and YOUR life. So, if your surgery is on the 11th and you still don't know about the size and style, do NOT feel bad that you demanded to know. Please don't get me wrong, I am not a doctor hater and I am ever so grateful for the care I have gotten, but it is still a business to them, so demand the best service.
O2bhealthy, good for you on doing the head shave. Was the hair starting to fall out already or are you just taking the bull by the horns? I think it is wonderful that you have your children so involved in your treatment and all things associated with it. I think it helps them cope better because they are kept in the loop, not just pushed aside and being told everything will be fine. You are a good mom (even though you don't feed your son lunch....BAHAHAHAHA......they don't need a lot of food at that age anyway.......BAHAHAHAHAHA). Seriously, don't feel bad, there is not one of us out there that hasn't done that and I can't even blame chemo.
Good job on no smoking Nadine and Malle...and everyone else. Keep up the good work!
Hugs,
Ellie
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Janzin......i want your puppy......
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Hey ladies, one more thing. I found mbscruggs on facebook. She is under Mary Beth Scruggs. Look for her. I hope she is doing ok. I have been worried about her. She just added me as a friend, and I am sure she would love to have all you guys there for her to support her as well.
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Hi, all. I was lucky enough to quit smoking beore my sx in May. Unfortunately, the fear of my 3rd tx of chemo last Monday I started smoking again. It is just as I never stopped. I am not sure I really want to stop, now. I missed my ciggs especially with my morning coffee. So now here I am thinking I want to quit again but loving them again.
Cigarettes are like a bad man, that I just cant get away from.
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Hi Sweet Ladies......
What long strange trip this has been....
First of all, I hope that each of you are doing as well as you can on your journey's-I will try to read all past posts, to catch up, but can't promise to. Will try to keep up from now on.
Alright-just to keep you guys updated on my junk:
Diagnosed with breast cancer 10/08. Had right mastectomy, stage 1, no chemo, just tamoxifen 12/09. Expander placed 3/09
Quit smoking June 22 expander to be exchanged July 22.
Diagnosed with Lung cancer July 10, and 2 spots on spine (also lung cancer- not breast)
Exchanged July 22 (but no augmentation like originally plaed because mass is on the side to augment and didn't know if i would need surgery). It feels 100% better than expander. Had to get expander out due to mri
Series of visits with oncologist, pulmonary specialists, radiation gurus
Biopsy of cancer on spine July 24- they didn't feel comfortable going after the actual lung mass
First chemo yesterday August 6- taxol, carboplatin, zolmeta. was going to do avistan, but just 2 weeks out of exchange they want to wait a few more weeks for that to heal more.
Having strerostaic intense radiation to spots on spine in severl weeks. Go this Tuesday to have body cast made for that procedure. Picked out a wig Wed.
Guess that is it for now. Just wanted to let you guys know what was up and I should be able to check in more frequently.
Love to each of you and Ellen- thank you for taking the time to give me the shout outs! You are the bomb.
mb
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cherneski - Do not feel bad that 3 & 4 th chemo really did a number on me too. Total fear but you can get pass this, it may jusst take some time. YOu have come to the right place Welcome.
Speaking of Doctors- Going thru Bi Lat Mast, recon, chemo,hercep and now Tamofin and exchange surgery oh and shot gun menopause I get the feeling that I am on a Merry go Round. I am by no mean a Dr hater - just do not have any energy for that. But I quess I would like to be explained things, Like why am I not being given a Pet Scan- or any scan except for the heart due to herceptin. very frustrated. with that.
I desperately want me back and to get on with the job of living and raising my kids. I know I have lost a huge part of me but I really feel I have to just put that behind me and move on.
Well Have a great smoke free day,
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Mary Beth, I am sending you prayers and strength, you have been on my mind too.
Hang in there and we are here for you always.
Malle
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Hey Mary Beth. Thank you so much for the update. We really appreciate you keeping us in the loop as we were all so worried about you! With good reason, oh, I am so sorry to hear the latest diagnosis. Your head must be spinning. Please know that we are all praying for you. So much to take in, I can't imagine.
Cherneski, welcome, you have come to the right spot if you are looking for support! You will get to know all the terrific woman of this crazy bunch in no time!
Malle--hang in there. I understand you just wanting to get back to your old life. I would love that myself. Even when I look at old photos I think in my head "that was BEFORE I was sick"....isn't that sad? My life has been split into 2, before and after cancer. Weird.
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Everyone (so many posts since last logged in!) - finally feel good enough to sit and read posts. 1st chemo side effects kicked my a@@ and then I tried to go back to work. I work for a public school and my contract start date was Aug 3 (1st chemo was July 29).
kk - sweetie, loved your analogies but was surprised that no one commented on what you stated as the price of a pack. Would you believe it's just under $10 per pack here in Hawaii? Should be more incentive to quit, no? Nonetheless, I was able to quit for only 4 days and have restarted even when cigs now taste super crappy.
mb - what can I say? Wow! Is there anything we can do to support you?
Nadine - all that employer cr@p is the last "one more thing" you and your husband need right now. I bet that guy makes the charity rounds playing the "good guy" while at the same time doing this kind of stuff to his employees. I'm guessing too that because your insurance is an under the table thing, you won't automatically fall under the COBRA alternative since basically you're self-insuring. Maybe not though. I hope that you guys can keep your insurance in place. Check with ACS (American Cancer Society) for more financial support. The local office here indicated that they can give you stuff like a free gas card to help offset the huge expenses of our BC treatment.You just need to be registered with ACS and although the gas card is a one time thing (I think) every bit helps.
Janzen - your puppy pic was the brightest spot in my whole day! Thank you so much for sharing the joy!!!! Puppy's name will Magic?
Michelle and Pam - thanks for the PM's! I'm sorry that my back spasms are making it very uncomfortable to sit for any real length of time at my computer. I'll answer as soon as I can.
Well, so happy I was able to check in with each of you. I love reading everyone's posts. Need to get ready for my physical therapy appointment and hope that she can help with these back spasms. Then it's off to work for a few hours... Will check in when I can. Love and hugs and prayers for wellness to you all!
DeniseM
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Hi MB, sooooo sorry to hear the news. My heart aches for you! You have had a really tough time of it, please take care of yourself. I worry about you and you have come to be a part of heart! I will be sending you much positive vibes to get through this and onward to your life. I wish I could be there to give you a big hug. Thanks for checking in, I have added you in FaceBook. Best to you!!!
Got to run ladies but will be back to check in. Lots of love heading your way!
Best,
Janet0 -
DeniseM: Never been rich so I have no idea what its like...however if its to screw folks then I guess I don't want to be mega rich. We aren't holding our breath on the input for the insurance. I was on Cobra years ago and it cost a fortune. I keep telling myself that their are folks far worse off with no jobs and insurance is the last of their worries.
Finally getting rain here in my Idaho town so I think a early nap is in order. Nice and dark and the sound of the rain is wonderful.
Mary Beth I added you on Facebook.
Thinking of all of my wonderful BCBK friends.
Love to you all,
Nadine
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MB - Thank you for the update! I am so sorry to hear about the new dx and am thinking of you often. You are in my prayers!
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Oh Mary Beth- this is just awful news and my heart goes out to you. This damn disease! Have I told you all I HATE CANCER! Not that that is not understood here. Please let me know if there is anything at all I can do or say to help you emotionally in any way possible. I remember my desparate plea early on in this thread for someone to help me with smoking. You responded right away, so kindly offering any help I might need. We are ALL here for you and I hope you don't forget or minimize that!
MB, I will be friend requesting you, shortly.By the way, I can't believe how much I am enjoying Facebook. My girls were doing it for years and I just thought it was a young persons thing, I surely couldn't understand why so much info? But now, particularly with relationships developed between all of us sisters online, it's such a nice way to feel even more that we've met. Or at least another great step in making the friendships even stronger.
I went for my post op visit with the surgeon and I am healing BEAUTIFULLY! A wonderful thing surely helped by all your good wishes. In order to put myself out there as the mental case I really am, I saw that as an opportunity to feel entitled to a cig or 2, or three! Did real well prior to surgery but now I am slowly adding to how much I smoke. After all the time spent getting through the jonesing, I have got to think more of myself by following through on the knowledge that I can at least just smoke when the need becomes overwhelming. It's the "giving up the best (ha!) friend", the one that hangs with me that I am battling. Especially being home all week recuperating from surgery.
Well my friends, that's about it for now. Oh Janzin, I just LOVE LOVE LOVE your baby!
xoEllen
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Hi Pantufas! Hope you are feeling better, will chat with you online soon.
O2Bhealthy, I bet you are beautiful hair or no hair. No worries on your son, I am sure he is okay and you got a lot going on with chemo, BC, life, blues, everything! It's okay to feel bad for yourself because you are important! Just like everyone is important too. But you know you have a special place in my heart so validate your feelings!!! I think we BC women have enough love for all!
Nadine, glad you posted your insurance problem. Together we might find a solution if nothing else to make a voice because it's not fair!!!! If I win the lotto, you all will receive too!
Malleme, Glad you got everything straighten out with your Dr. I am like you, too quiet about my needs and just along too. Love the name, she will be Magic in my life for sure. Small energetic dog, like the one in Mask. I like Mayvis too. Maybe we should call her Butt Kicker lol. Or BK for short. Glad you ranted, it is good for you!!! Congrats on not smoking!
Fifish, you make me smile every time you laugh.
Welcome Cherneski! This is a great place with awesome ladies. We will walk the walk with you. We know what you are going through, hard to quit with the stress of BC, etc. We will help you and post away, you are on your way to being a nonsmoker just by wanting to quit! Good luck to you, I look forward to hearing from you.
Denise, lol, we have done posts on pricing before, perhaps the reason for no comments. But it's good to comment because you never know when someone needs to hear it. Can't believe how expense it is in Hawaii, but then Hawaii is pretty expense anyways. I wish I was there with you, I would love to walk the beaches!!!! Sorry that your chemo kicked your butt, happy you are back. I am thinking about Magic, we all could use some. Hang in there, sending you hugs!
ReKoz, so glad you are healing up well, I bet that is a load off your mind. Stay strong and keep at it. You are right, facebook is pretty fun. Working with all of you plus my biz and the games are fun which I don't feel like drinking my 1-2 glasses of wine anymore. And been cutting down on the hard liquor too. Have you done MySpace yet. I am suppose for biz. Well don't beat yourself for 2-3 cigs. I have walked with you for awhile and You are doing way better. We will get there one day!
My baby says "Love unconditionally and she love you all"
Janet0 -
Hey Janet. I think you should name your new dog "Boobie" to make up for the one you lost!! BAHAHAHAHA....
have a great weekend ladies!
Love you gals!
Ellie
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What about "TaTa"... 0
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flfish, if the cancer doesn't get me, you will.lol! You reminded me of the episode in Black Adder when the monks were having their booze-up and were wearing a pair of boobies on their heads. Couldn't tell you why but they made me laugh.
Sorry my posts are so disjointed and I can't remember what some one says until I'm half asleep and jerk up and think ahh crap! I forgot to mention this and that to so and so. It's bad having short term memory loss but after four strokes I'm lucky to have a memory. So bear with me ladies. I read your words and I laugh and I cry and my thoughts are with you.
mb, so glad to see you posting and feel honored that you have let us in on what you are dealing with right now. I believe in prayer and positive energy and I know that is why I am still here. It makes me strong and stubborn and you need that (we all do) to get you through. Know that you are loved and we are with you.
o2b, sorry about your rash and no you are not a bad mother and your son knows that. I did that a couple of times with mine and started paying the lunch room lady in advance for a month at a time. At least that was a system you could take advantage of in the schools where they went. Or, if it helps, put a week's worth in a pot and let them get it themselves. It's amazing how well their memories work.
REKoz, hope you are doing okay after the wedding excitement is done and dusted. I remember being a little depressed after the fact. You have a son now and I think that's pretty neat! I am sooo glad you are healing well. I know I shouldn't say this but treat yourself to a cig. I'm not being very supportive of you quitting but I am just thinking of you and I do remember what it was like. Weird thing is, I smoked like a train through all of my other surgeries and healed beautifully. I quit smoking and my lung is still giving me fits. But I guess that has a lot to do with the fact that I poured tons of smoke and nicotine into that breathing apparatus for years and it just couldn't take anymore. I really do miss smoking though. I guess I shouldn't say that either.
malle, I agree with everyone else. Make sure you know that they know exactly what it is that your bs is going to be doing before they put you under. Let your nurses in theater know and your anesthesiologist know. I had to laugh about you asking the nurse what she was going to be doing for you. Sometimes sarcasm is what is needed.
Well Janzin, that sausage is going to have to be named. Call her Babylon because she's wild and exotic or Echo because you'll be hearing a lot of that or Snapdragon because she'll do a lot of that too if I know JR's. The suspense is getting to me. Just kidding! Keep up the amazing work you are doing for the site as well as getting your tournament together. You are fantastic!
Nadine, I still owe you one about trying to milk the bull. I hope you get your rain. I think your DH is dealing with his boss in the best way. I owe you an apology for when I thought he was being insensitive while still smoking when you are trying to quit. I learned from your posting on another thread that he was tender and very supportive of you during chemo. I'm sure he's been carrying the burden of his boss longer than you know to try and protect you and keep you from worrying.
I know I have missed a slew of you and it isn't my intention. It will take a while to work you into this feeble brain. Will try to do better in the future. Welcome to the newbies. You have a place here. These ladies are the best!
Saw a beautiful butterfly today and it reminded me of another beautiful butterfly. I hope you are well dear one. Chin up!
Have a peaceful night you adorable wenches!
Love and big slarpy kisses,
Nancy, Pat, Susan
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Pantufas: Hubby continues to smoke and when he first lights up it smells good...so we do a handshake instead of a drag for me and so far its working pretty good. We are going out of town for our anniversary and I told him to get a room with no-smoking. I was in the bathroom and I heard him ask for smoking...I lucked out they only had non-smoking rooms so he has to go outside...funny.
I have been so lucky to have a husband who went every step of the way with me through the cancer trip. Knowing him, he is protecting me and I do appreciate that. I had a mild stroke about a year before we met and was on a verge of another one or worse a few years back and then BC came along.
I have a 5 o'clock shadow for hair...I have so many colors on my head I just may have rainbow of colors on my head...white, brown, black and redish~~~different kind of rainbow.
Well back to crashing on the couch.
Love you all,
Nadine
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Nadine,
I love the handshake deal. Some times you just know there is a God! ( no smoking room being the only one available ) Reading about your DH reminds me of how much I miss mine but there is nothing we can do right now. He has to stay in Portugal for his disability and health insurance and the same thing for me here. The most bittersweet thing is he is the one I should have married to start with but it took half a life time to find him and maybe that's why we appreciate each other so much. Besides, I would go through what I went through again just to have my kids.
I'm not saying this to be a know-it-all because I still smoked after my worst stroke but it is so much better for us that we don't now.
I had to laugh about your hair! I have a 5 o'clock shadow too but what's funny is the back is black and the front is white with a big black upside down question mark from my forehead to my crown. Here's to your rainbow! I am already thinking about the hair dye and I think maybe not. When my oldest son found out about my bc he said it was all of that hair dye that did it. I had to laugh! I've been dying it since my late teens because of the white hair (thyroid).
Rest well my friend and a good weekend to you and all of my other BCBK buddies!
Love you bunches,
Nancy, Pat, Susan
Remember ladies...........STOP THE INSANITY!!!!!!!!!
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My hair is going to drive me nuts and wear out the carpet going to the bathrooms to look at it. This morning like clock work I checked out the growth progress...I have a patch of dark hairs in the front, its more like a sideways strip. I used to use the color the gray when I had no grays, the wash out kind. At 55 my whites wouldn't show so I would find one and make sure it was showing above the other hairs...somehow I missed the gray stage. And its funny because I am getting all of these make-up and hair color books. Little to no hair and missing eyelashes and half of my brows.
Looking forward to our little trip for our Anniversary. Told DH that we must get out and walk because of my swollen feet and legs. Last think is for the swelling to get worse and wreck the few days we get to get away. The place has a hot-tub but doc says I can't do those yet. How well eating out and is the best part...no cooking, Yippee!!!
Thinking of you all and hoping you are having a wonderful weekend. Sending cheer and smiles to everyone.
Nadine
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OMG, you ladies crack me up. Love you for that! Boobies and Ta Ta. I could name her Nip, for the one nipple I have. Will I got a lot unpack yesterday. Couldn't go to surgery and come home to a place filled with boxes. I like to clean everything up, laundry done, something cooked, Netflix sending my favorite movs, you can tell I've done this a lot, lol. But a clean house is a MUST!
Pantufas, glad to see your post. I know it's hard to keep up sometimes, can you imagine when we have 30 regulars or more, lol. Each post will be one page, lol. I am sure we will figure something out. I love this size too as it makes it possible to reach out to all and we have become close because of it too. Babylon is awesome and Echo reminds me of my brain, lol. I could name her Shut Up, just to mess with people. "What's your dog name?" , "Shut Up" lol. Kisses to you!
Nadine, don't mean to laugh on your hair but you make it funny. I can just picture you checking every 5 minutes or doing a neck crank and checking on your hair when walking be a mirror. I have some pretty good stuff for the eye lashes, mine are getting long and fuller. And it grows them in darker. Tired putting some on my eye brows but it didn't work, was hoping to get rid of the white or gray hairs, lol. It's good to hear a sense of humor while you are going through so much. Just love you!!!
Well BC But Kickers, will work on the web today. Sending out smiles and laughter and best wishes to all.
Janet0
