Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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There was a gap, but Sandy posted in "How about drinking" today.
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DH is on the mend. No fever today and he is eating. He feels much better. Yay
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Life often gets in the way of me working all the way through "My Favorite Topics" on any given day, lately. (Cat care, snow issues, appointments, dealing with minor crises here & there, shopping, Olympics, etc.). No vacation till Gordy & Leslie's wedding. Stuff I used to save for this thread has been "front-loaded" into the Drinking & Dinner threads.
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Sandy - glad you’re doing fine, sorry you weren’t off on some fabulous vacation.
Yesterday we washed both cars, after I did my bike ride and went to the gym. Hung out and ate lunch, before my second wind had me getting the power washer out to clean the back lanai. Once I got it out I washed the outside of all the windows w soap and a squeegee. Then power washed the lanai and house. Took a breather before running to Winn Dixie to grab meat on their weekend sales, and grabbed a pizza for dinner. It was a long day, and not horribly hot.
With all the activity yesterday I should still be asleep. But alas, partner got up when it was still dark out. I assumed using the bathroom but he never got back in bed. So I went looking for him. He said he had a tickle in his throat and didn’t want to wake me. He took something and got back in bed. I tossed and turned until at 7, I just got up. I will crash for a nap later.
Hope everyone is doing well.
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Hello folks -- BCO has been a close companion for a couple of months, but I am signing off.
From mammogram on 12/29 to lumpectomy 2/1 I was glued to the information to be found here, and needing the personal support from you all. Now I am through, there will be no further treatments. As my BC says, if I grow another DCIS in ten years (I am 71) they can do another lumpectomy and radiation then. But for 2022 and the foreseeable future, I am not playing this game. This cancer is in my past.
So long, my friends, I have enjoyed (as much as is possible) knowing you and I wish you all, all the best.
--Vandercat
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Cindy, I had a night similar to yours. I did go back for a nap and slept until 9:45. Hope you were able to do the same.
It is a beautiful day, warm, sunny and the trees are full of birds. DH is feeling better, but I think he still should go to the doctor and get checked out.
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When we endure our own tragedies or trials, most of us develop some empathy and compassion for others who are suffering. The trick is to keep that sense of compassion going throughout our daily lives, when we are likely to go on automatic pilot and move back into being judgmental—especially when times are tough. -Bill O'Hanlon
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Just now getting ready for a nap which I have been enjoying most days. Usually comes a bit earlier but I had some computer woes and it ended up taking longer to fix than usual. I did a lot yesterday myself -- more than I normally do. Today all I have to do is wash my hair and do a couple of bills along with that precious nap.
Hope you all have a wonderful day.
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Vandercat, congrats on the "one & done." Happy trails from hereon in, but we'll be glad to see you pop in just to catch up.
Rainstorms overnight (b'bye, snow on the ground), but Snowmageddon returns Thurs & Fri., with single-digit low temp predicted for Sat. a.m. Ah, Chicago in Feb.--weather rollercoaster.
So here's the saga of the MOG dress for Gordy's wedding. The navy blue Ralph Lauren from Bloomie's (which site's sizing tool told me to order a 10, even when I "fed" it a 36 I bra size), turned out to have a nipped in (seamed) waist not apparent from the photo, and a bodice not built for my Parton-esque "balcony." Even with a Spanx camisole I couldn't zip the back all the way up--and if anyone were successful in doing it for me, they'd have to scissor me out of the dress. Returned it--only to find that all the Special Occasion dresses at the downtown Bloomie's were (almost all) sleeveless spangled bandages (either floor-length or micro-mini), with nothing larger than size 8 (mostly 0-4). Would've panicked had I not had a Plan B (C,D,E. & F) in reserve.
Was able to dig out my old burgundy Holy Clothing "Ophelia Mini," which is longer on me than in 2014...because I'm shorter (duh). Almost 2 sizes too big (XL/1X)--but tying the back belt as far as it'd go gives it a nice nipped-in but still comfy silhouette. Wrinkled & needs ironing--but I showed Leslie the photo and she loves it. Have in transit a ready-to-ship Azazie "Francine" knee-length jacket dress (since there's a thigh-hi side slit, pantyhose necessary) in the same plum color as Leslie's mom's "Julia;" a navy chiffon sheath with jacket and crystal neckline from David's Bridal, both size 14 (ego blow). The Azazie is final sale, so if there's no way it'd ever fit there's always eBay; the David's Bridal would be perfect for the next Hospital Black Tie Gala From Hell (although I suspect it'll need more than a few nips & tucks). Also ordered (from Holy Clothing) a dark green Ophelia Mini in M (site says that style runs big), a dark green Cartriona Midi and navy Daphne Midi both in size L. If the latter are too long & big, I can return them; will keep the green Ophelia for another occasion (might not be a dark enough green for the wedding color palette).
As to shoes, Leslie's mom is wearing flat dressy sandals because the second-line recessional will be 4 blocks over cobblestones. So my strappy kitten-heel metallic Stuart Weitzmans will be in the coat-check room for the reception; for the ceremony & recessional, I have a pair of gold Alegria rocker-sole slight-wedge sandals (with orthotic footbeds) that would be perfect.
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Thx ChiSandy. Happy trails to you too! ;-)
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Sandy, Sounds complicated, but I hope you find the perfect dress.
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When you live in the present moment, time stands still. Accept your circumstances and live them. If there is an experience ahead of you, have it! But if worries stand in your way, put them off until tomorrow. Give yourself a day off from worry. You deserve it. Some people live with a low-grade anxiety tugging at their spirit all day long. They go to sleep with it, wake up with it, carry it around at home, in town, to church, and with friends. Here's a remedy: Take the present moment and find something to laugh at. People who laugh, last. -Barbara Johnson
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Ah, we awoke to rain this a.m. Should have known immediately with my arm aching arm. We are due to receive a lot of Sandy's winter woes. Gone the 61 degrees making possible the rain. Sure won't be liking what comes next and it will hang around for a while too. Hoping next week (as often happens) will give us something better. Just hard to say this time of yr. when weather is almost always iffy.
Going to do some taxes this afternoon. We don't really have too but as we found out with stimulus checks we had last, even though we don't have to file -- if you don't and something (like stimulus checks) come up you are no longer registered on the roles and wouldn't receive yours. So we will go and file the one for people in our category who don't really have to file. I forget what it was called -- something like a non-filers form.
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We took yesterday off from working in the basement which is coming along nicely but slowly because DH has far too much stuff and needs to seriously winnow it down. There is actually some extra space in the storage closet and no, he has been contained to two shelves only in there since he has ample storage in other areas. Sort of a give him an inch and he will take a mile guy. My DD and DSIL joined us for a shopping jaunt to the outlets in Lancaster, PA where they benefited from finding the dining room table, 4 chairs and a storage cabinet at the Crate and Barrel outlet. They saved a bundle because we checked out the same items online when we got home and the savings on the table alone was > $600 which literally covered the cost of the other items. They do need to rent a truck to get the items home but they live about 30 minutes away and even the truck rental should be covered by what they saved on the chairs and cabinet. So a win-win for them. My DD can be a procrastinator (like her DD) so this also solved a problem of an empty dining room for over 6 months as she "searched for replacements". For us our purchases were mostly food items such as sausage and cheese stuffed mushmoom caps, cranberry stuffing stuffed chicken breasts, some jellies and of course a wet bottom shoofly pie. Other items such as ham loaf were purchased for the freezer. I did buy some clothing and lingerie items that were necessities. It warmed up to 60 degrees so by the afternoon we had abandoned jackets enjoying being bare armed. I will visit the Tanger Outlet center next time since many of the stores in the older Rockvale center have moved there due to rent issues. Masks were not universal but I did see more than I had expected.
This is such a pretty area with the Amish farms, seeing their horse drawn buggies, and finding their food which did not happen yesterday. The restaurants we would normally have visited were permanently closed so we will need to find new sources of the real PA Dutch food (carb loaded). We did visit Stolzfus's for the meats, baked lima beans, etc. So dinner for the next few nights will be covered by foods I can just bake or reheat. Lunch was at one of the few Friendly's still left in this area and of course, we all had sundae's for dessert! They had outdoor tables so we opted to eat there.
It was nice to just have a day out with great weather and good company.
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Had to add this because my DH finally admitted he has "TOO MUCH STUFF" so no wonder it is raining here today. I'll take the rain since he is doing a major purging but I wish he would not use the floor as a sorting, & filing site because it creates a major tripping hazard.
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another sub zero morning. Yesterday high was 8F. It’s been snowing the past few days but little accumulation. It won’t break 32 till the weekend. Betrayal, sounds like a nice day shopping. Happy for you the DH is getting rid of stuff
Stay warm and stay safe
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Good morning. It is foggy this morning, but going to 80. MO tomorrow.
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It need not discourage us if we are full of doubts. Healthy questions keep faith dynamic. In fact, unless we start with doubts, we cannot have a deep-rooted faith. One who believes lightly and unthinkingly has not much of a belief. One who has a faith which is not to be shaken has won it through blood and tears--has worked his or her way from doubt to truth as one who reaches a clearing through a thicket of brambles and thorns.
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Glad to hear admissions of too much stuff. Had to chuckle at my Dh. He is saying our sil has too much stuff. This is being said by someone who has doubles or triples of so many things and who had the garage in such a dis-ordered state it wasn't safe to walk around inside. It looks great now and I'm highly skeptical that sil has any more and maybe less than what Dh has and likely has forgotten it is even his. I wish your Dh much success Betrayal and a huge hope that he soon get sorted items off the floor and in goodwill boxes or in file 13. Good for him and you.
Seeing very small snowflakes outside. I think nothing major will go on till this afternoon. then it may be sleet plus some snow. No one seems clear or just who between parts of Missouri and us who are about 80 miles East, will get and exactly when. We will be under the threat though until after some time Thursday. Cool temps to continue thru the week-end, but good warming afterwards.
A visit planned today with our friends Dr. B and Jo. I agonized about going but finally decided that I really should. They have a few things coming up and will go to FLA. as well for a sm. amt. of time. Family there who want a get-together. So, I will go over and see the puppies while they are gone and their daughter is at work. It will seem like old times. Would be nice if I had my car back by then, but I probably won't. SIL is looking to get home as soon as he can, but things are still not as yet settled in Ca. I do think it won't be much longer though.
I do miss having my car when I want it, but since none of the three cars my kids have is in working order right now -- we will just have to leave things as they are. When sil gets back he will get their cars going.
Hope you all have a really good day.
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Jackie, it is a laborious process with him but just the admission that he "has too much stuff" was a lightbulb moment. I finally lost it when I could not find a path to get from one side of the office area to the other nor walk at the base of the steps because he had items piled up that needed to get moved to the garage. I blew my lid and told him he had to clean up because he was creating a safety hazard plus it had a negative impact on what I was able to do. So far we have a bunch of boxes going to Habitat, a few to go to the teacher's organbization that benefits them and their students and lastly, Purple Heart. Because he was able to store so much stuff out of sight, it was either forgotten or sometimes because he doesn't take stock of what he has and ends up buying more. I found 14 rolls of packing tape as an example, yes, he does do some ebay sales but it will take a while to use all of them up.
Once we have finished the house which will probably be by late spring, the next site for culling and tossing is the garage. It is attached to the house and is uninsulated so quite cold in the winter. I want to clear it out, have my DB install insulation and drywall and then we will have someone paint the interior again. I have an extra refrigerator and an upright freezer in the garage as well as an overflow from my smaller pantry. I'd just like it to be presentable and more organized since we do store garden equipment there and I'd like to pare down my collection of garden pots.
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Was able to get out late this afternoon to finally at last get my long put off mammogram. Dh went with me since it was late afternoon and didn't feel too sure about weather conditions. Well, the mammogram from signing in to being done and in the waiting room again was a trip. Don't know exactly when it started snowing but it was coming down good when Dh went to bring the car up to the hospital portico. I was glad Dh went with me. I was having a bit of a time with breathing in the N-95 mask and would have really felt ragged if I had to walk though snow to get to the car.
By the time we drove the couple of miles back to our house and got out of the car we could hear and feel sleet mixed in with the snow. Had hopes we wouldn't get that part of the storm, but no dice. It may happen off and on all the way to midnight tomorrow night. Hopefully they will be wrong about that part.
Daughter came home early from work to have a nice long rest as she is going back to work tonight at 11p.m. I'm not liking that at all. The highway crews do good on the highway which is about a mile from where we are but things can be dicey on our roads until you reach the highway. She hasn't done much driving in snow and I think even less if there is ice/sleet on the roads. I'm hoping there will be just enough snow (fingers heavily crossed) on top of the ice to keep her doing okay. She is a good driver and hopefully she will start out early.
Betrayal. I think my Dh may have met his match and then some as far as buying repeat items. It is maddening to me sometimes, but for better or worse huh !!
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She should do fine so long as she goes slow and has a cellphone. Do you have a dependable cellphone signal around where you live? There are places around here where a cellphone can pick up nothing-- no matter which provider you have.
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Strength is a capacity for endurance. One of the dividends of suffering is the universal discovery that we possess a strength within us we never knew we had. Navigating through a difficult episode not only shows us that inner strength is there but convinces us it will always be there to serve us in the future. Overcoming gives us an assurance of personal confidence and value that far exceeds what we thought we possessed before our struggles began.
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A light snow (along with a bit of ice) lies just outside my window. More due today if weatherman is correct. Sigh !!! We are out of milk. It is what it is and maybe with care we can get the three blocks to Dollar Genral and get some milk. Otherwise, I think we are fine with plenty of food for the couple of days we may have this going on.
Daughter did do fine pretty much. She goes pretty slow but she did slip around a bit. Last night when she left for work around 10:45 there would have been little on the highway once she got to it, so she could go at whatever speed would make her feel safe. By then they likely had the highway dept. out salting the roads. They usually don't come do our country blacktops out here. We have a new mayor so we might not even get the cindery materials they used to put on the corner. I'll have to ask Kate when she gets up.
Our cell phones seem to work okay here -- could be better. You have to know where to be in the house and sometimes have to go in the screen room. We have boosters on everything here which does help back here in all the trees.
Not much planned for the day but I wasn't much going anywhere save for the bank or medical appts. Did visit out friends yesterday for a bit. Dr. B told me that some people who had open heart surgery could feel their incision/bones for a real long time. I complained about having so much "feeling" still where my chest was opened.
Praying for the Ukranian people.
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DH had heart surgery at 49yo. It was numb for months and then started itching where it was stitched.
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It does take a while for nerve endings to regenerate after surgery and many of the incisions today are closed with self-absorbing sutures that breakdown months later which could explain the itching. My surgery was the end of October and I still have no sensation at the incision site. I am using an anti-scar cream to keep the scar soft since it was really hard at first. It is a work in progress and is less hard but still not as soft as I would like.
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DH had open heart surgery two years ago next month. He can still feel the wires in his chest and the incision is sensitive both on his chest and his leg. I remember when I had my bone graft on my leg it took years before touching the incision wasn't annoying.
It got into the 20s today - a heat wave!!
Stay safe
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Hi ladies, I’m new to the group and I’m feeling better just reading all the posts.
I’m 60 and I’ll be two weeks out of a lumpectomy and axillary node dissection on March 1st when I go back into surgery to get a clear margin around the second smaller lump they discovered during the post surgery biopsy. I was a little freaked out about going back to surgery, but my sister tells me it’s not uncommon.
What’s more troubling and I hope some of you can offer me words of wisdom, is the pain from the axillary node dissection. The lumpectomy area is tender but manageable. The arm and armpit pain is relentless. How did you relieve the stinging, aching, burning and swollen feelings?
We’ve had icy rain here in Dallas the past two days. I’m hoping the sun will be out tomorrow for a walk to the mailbox I’ve neglected for 2 weeks!
I look forward to your advice.
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KathrynW, Welcome. I had the surgery in 2019 and still have strange pains in my arm pit. I don't remember how far after surgery, I was instructed on exercises I had to do for for my arm pit. The SO called them "itsy bitsy spider" from the childhood Nursery Rhyme. I still do some of the pumping exercises when I get the strange pains. I find it difficult to stretch and lift on the surgical side. I had to sleep with my arm slightly elevated and still do. After your surgery on the first, talk with your doctors.
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KathrynW - welcome to the group no one wants to be a member of, but here we are. It’s been a while for me but the node area is always tender. For you I’d suggest icing the area, small ice pack on and off. Also as Petite mentioned there are exercises, facing the wall you walk your hand up (spider like) as high as is comfortable. Before you know it you’ll get it higher than the day before. Ask your surgeon for exercises. I too had a re-excision, it’s not as bad as it sounds and it is common to go back for clean margins.
We’ve not been receiving much mail. We had an insurance company for the FL car tell us the insurance cards sent to us were returned to them as “undeliverable.” We were skeptical. BUT partner has been waiting for membership card to AOH, which he paid for by credit card months back. He called them and was told it was returned to them as undeliverable. They then sent an email with a picture of the mail. Envelope is correctly addressed and has the yellow sticker for “undeliverable.” Today we have to take a ride to the post office, this is totally unacceptable and has to stop. Ever since Joy tried to destroy the USPS we’ve had some issues. But this is the first time we have proof of failure to deliver our mail.
Weather has been HOT. They say similar to summer without the rain. I hate it this hot and humid. I know, no sympathy from my northern friends. Our NY house is in the path of the snow storm and is expecting 8-12”. We’ve hiked, I’ve biked early before the heat rises, but I find I don’t get much done outside after noon. We had thought of a baseball game, college using the MLB spring training field, but not sure I can sit outside for long.
Wherever you are I hope you’re safe and sound
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