NOLA in September?
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I knew right after stage IIa there would be a stage IIb... and went into IIb saying there might be a IIc.... so I scheduled IIb in January to get it all in in 2013. I too went into my first surgery with great breasts, and want what I want... I will say though, that I am a short surgery away from being done. In my opinion, a little more fat grafting in two areas and cleaning up one incision... That's it... I think its ok to have another surgery if it will make you feel the best you can be, and you are up to it... I never thought a 6 hour surgery would be my finishing touches... I think a quick one is all I need. In the meantime, I am going to be patient and see if I change my mind... But in the areas that I think need grafting, it isn't like the area will fill in all on its own...
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For me, it has to do with not settling because of the position I've been put into. If I'm going to lose both of my (otherwise perfectly fine) breasts at 35 due to cancer, I want the replacements to be incredible abd as close to perfect as I can get. I figure I owe at least that much to myself and my hubby. Granted, I've sailed through both surgeries with flying colors. I may feel differently if I were prone to complications....might be too risky for me. But with my history, I have no problems whatsoever going back for perfection, if Dr. D thinks its attainable, I'm game!
I will also add...I've struggled with poor self-esteem since I was a pre-teen. My post pregnancy body literally disgusted me and sent me into a deep, 4 year depression, that cost me my youngest's baby years and almost my marriage. I'm just beginning to emerge from that depression and a nice body/breasts are certainly helping my confidence and depression. I feel like I'm getting my life back! If I can finally get rid of my body image issues, I am absolutely going to do it.
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Thinking of you Mags!
Does anybody need a date added? PM me!
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Y'all make me feel so much better! I think I am being picky about wanting a 2b, but I also think I've earned the right to be picky, and that's ok. My husband supports me in whatever I decide, and I think I'll just keep it quiet for everyone else who thinks I am insane.
I have no intention of doing anything until fall. I want to enjoy my summer, and we have a couple nice vacations planned. Then about October I will decide what my next steps will be- either tattoos or stage 2b. If I still have money left in my FSA, I'll schedule something in November and if not, I'll look at January. Last year we used the entire FSA amount in February, so we contributed the max this year. Gotta spend it or lose it!
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TRACY.. I feel exactly the same way. I want perfect. And I am one who did start off with complications, and I am still game for more... I have told my husband, mom, friends that I plan on a IIc, and no one balks at it. I have also put it on the table to Jeanine and Laura... I have been laying the groundwork for a while... If a short little tweak will make me happy, then why not do it... I also would wait until November.
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I am stopping at just the stage 1 and stage 2 surgeries. I had weight loss surgery 3 years ago and I ended up in the hospital 5 times after my initial WLS surgery with major complications, I am surgeried out...... I have to say though I am extremely happy with what Dr. Trahan was able to do for me. My breasts and stomach look better now than they did before the cancer DX.
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teddybear71...I so agree with you! Dr. D did an absolutely wonderful job, sure there are things that need to be tweaked, but honestly, I wasn't perfect before and I'm a LOT thinner now (went from size 8 to a 1-2 pant) and MUCH MUCH smaller (by choice from a exploding 34DD to a 34 C/D) in the chest area. I'm so done with surgeries!!!!!!
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I felt very guilty even thinking about wanting more. I came to NOLA after stage II. Happier than before but not quite ready to do the tattoos and call it quits. Hate that money is such an issue. Seems weird that at age 50, I am obsessing over perky perfect boobs. How much is too much and when do we stop? Is symentry really ever achieved? And the ones that started here at NOLA, were you able to stop at just stage II? Still dreaming I will win the lottery and spend a couple more weeks in NOLA!
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Thanks everyone for your honest answers. I guess the difference with me is that 1. I went in with not so great breasts and they are now enormously improved. 2. With ovca I am almost guaranteed a recurrence and shortened life span and I don't want to spend anymore then I have to in medical intervention. (I hope this is not depressing anyone.) On the other hand, I recover very well from these surgeries and a quick surgy would be easy for me. I will see how things shake out, I do love my new body- I will see how the imperfections go and if they are nothing in the overall scheme of things or if they bother me and I can tolerate a quick fix. I guess my dilemma is- what if my breasts are beautiful to me though not perfect and I am told I can get them better if I take the opportunity to do so- am I driven to perfection?Anyway if I did do something it would be after the summer, so I might see you again Betsy.
Has anyone heard from Maggie?0 -
Well Pamela... wheher we meet again in NOLA or someday up in Ridgewood (I did tell you my BIL lives there), I am sure we will meet again.
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Betsy- you have a deal!
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I made a big long post yesterday, but I forgot to mention that my pathology report read clear margins all around, and the sentinel node was negative. They did find some ADH and some DCIS on my right prophylactic side, which doesn't surprise me one bit, and means absolutely no regrets about the bilateral mastectomies. Great news!
In other news, I came home from NOLA to Boston today with all 4 drains, but one is clearly ready to come out. I'll make some calls tomorrow and see whether my GP or my gyno can do this quick on a walk-in basis. Otherwise, I may very well see whether I can do it on my own. I'll report back on this tomorrow.
And finally... I need even some more advice from you experienced post-surgical ladies. I'm having what can only be described as a psychiatric complication! I'm super tearful and emotionally volatile. I've cried more in the last 7 days than in the last 7 years put together! Nothing is wrong. Pathology report was good. Everything seems ok with my breasts. I just suddenly feel like crying for hours on end. I reported this at my followup visit with Dr. D. and was assured to find this is "normal". but normal or not, I really need to pull myself together! Does anyone have any advice for me about that?
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Kim, it's completely normal to feel emotional. You are worn out from surgery, relieved that it is over, relieved that you made the right decision about pbmx (yay!), and you just had hormone-dependent tissue removed. I was very emotional after my bmx but I found that the tears eased up after about 2 weeks. I had to let it out though. My hormones are still not quite back to normal though. My periods are irregular, and I can still have sudden mood swings. After almost 8 months, the mood swings are improving. Congratulations on being on the other side of surgery. Life will slowly get back to normal. Rest well!
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Kim...what you've been through is a BIG deal and it's certainly normal to be emotional about it, especially as fresh out of a major surgery that you are. It's a huge amount to emotionally deal with.
When I was really down in the days following Stage 1, I found what helped me the most was getting up, getting dressed and walking. My Mom was staying with me and I treasure the midweek lunches we had. She got me up and got me back into my life in a way that I could physically handle, and in turn it helped heal me emotionally. Another thing that was helpful was keeping my mind occupied. I played lots of games...solitaire, rummikub, anything to keep me from wallowing in self pity.
I did let myself have one REALLY good cry. It was a huge bawling sort of cry on my hubby's shoulder and I did feel better afterwards. I'd been bottling up so many emotions trying to get ready for stage 1, that after I was done...I let it all out.
Hang in there...you sound REALLY great!
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Hi Kim. It was great to see you in the hospital and I am so glad for your good pathology results. That is just great. Re crying, after my Stage 1, I spent a lot of time lying in bed and crying. I also watched all of Friday Night Lights (75 episodes!), which is great for cathartic crying. I had a lot of feelings re my mom's death from BC years ago and also processing the BRCA diagnosis so I just tried to let it all out. Eventually I felt better and stopped the daily crying. So you aren't weird. I hope you are feeling loved and supported in your healing - it helps with the hard work of patient recovery. Sonya
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Hope mags is doing good, been thinking of you a lot!!! Be well!!!
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Hi everyone! So far I feel much less tearful today than yesterday (my travel day), and your soothing words and related experiences help a lot. I have very little experience with surgery, and I envisioned that it would hurt much more physically, and hurt much less emotionally! LAstar, if my experience is similar to yours, I'm more than halfway to the 2 week point, and I'll prepare myself for volatility. Audrella, I am just settling down into a home routine starting today. I'll arm myself with strategies to stay mentally and physically occupied. I noticed in NOLA that I was less tearful when busy out and about than I was during my downtime. And Sonya, I relate so much to your experience of postsurgical mourning. It seems that for me there are a lot of past traumas that seem to be needing more "work" right now, and probably at least some of that is productive. I was delighted to read your post-stage-2 report here, and I only wish I could see how your surgery will come out! It was really a joy to make your in-person aquaintaince. I'll see my therapist this evening after a week off, and maybe he'll have additional helpful tips. Thank you!
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Ok, call me crazy but I think they are getting more even. I think some of the ?swelling ?fat grafting has gone down from the larger size since I posted. I will probably post pics again at 8 wks.
Has anyone heard from Maggie?
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Pamela that is wonderful to hear!!
Since I'm totally without boobs now..I put my mastectomy bra on and added some prosthesis that I was given from a dear friend. I wore them pretty much all day and I have to say that I don't like them one bit! Hot and itchy, and it's not even summer yet. I know I'm making the right decision to reconstruct. I commend women who have been wearing these sob's for a long time! There has got to be a better invention for this. I'm thinking like a pump where you can just pump some air into the bra to your desired size! Wouldn't be so heavy and itchy!!!!!
Mags hope you are well:)0 -
Russell-What a great idea! Air-filled boobies. Maybe for fun we could use helium and float away. I sincerely hated my prosthesis - at the time I was a DD. That sucker was huge and heavy! It was hot summer in the south after my first MX. After my second, I took a GF to an old fashioned 5 & 10 and bought foam falsies. They were much better and lighter. I wore them for several months til they could begin the recon. Have you got a firm date yet for surgery?
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martyJ.. I have the foam ones too and they are lighter, but mine are small and I wanted some big ones!! lol
I'm still waiting for Liz to call me with confirmation. She emailed Tuesday and said she would call me that day with info and she still has not. I called today and was told she was at lunch and she would call me after. I'm patiently waiting for my confirmation....not! lol I want to know now..just to put my mind at ease:)0 -
Not crazy Pamela, Dr. D. told me that there will be some shifting around as the healing continues. As in some moving forward and more to the center if that makes sense. Glad to hear yours is going in the right direction!
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Betsy, Audrella and Pamella, you ladies look amazing. Thank you for sharing the photo's. It was all I could do to send pics to NOLA. I admire your giving of yourselves in this way. Thank you.
Quick question on bathing post stage 1 and 2. I enjoy my long hot bath soaks. At week 4 post stage 1 when I could finally soak again, it made all the difference in the world to me. It was when I didn't hurt or feel those skin sensations that drove me crazy. However I never asked if the hot water (hot but not scalding- obviously) was bad for the flap. How long should I avoid the bath and opt for a shower post stage two lip and fat grafting?
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Hi ladies...I am awake but confined to bed..dr m did not like look our sound of flap yesterday but shewas just here and said it looks great...fever up too..went to 102.8 in night but coming back down now
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Maggie - Sounds much better. So glad that you heard us all cheering for you!
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Thanks Paula Kay.
Maggie, wishing you the best for everything to resolve and that you have a speedy recovery.
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Mags, so glad to hear from you, we are all praying like crazy for your quick recovery, will continue well wishes your way!!!
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Maggie... I read your post last night on FB... and was thinking of you... Glad things are looking up...
Paula.. Thank you... About baths, I think the only restriction is on closed holes and incisions. So as long as your drain holes are closed and incisions closed, I think baths are ok.. But certainly check with the doctor.
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Mags!
So great to hear from you. The big talk today on this thread is "how is Mags?"
I have a friend who was in the same situation as you. She had a PAP flap that finally did the trick and said she is praying for your leftie.
Stay still, hang tight, and know that you have a whole lot of prayers and positive wishes going your way.0 -
Maggie. I saw your post on Facebook. I have been so thinking about you. I am sooo happy to hear things are better. We have all been wondering. Thoughts and prayers going your way. ((((Hugs))))
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