Wardrobe pics for boobless days
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My new resolution is to drop 40 lbs.Without my breasts I now can't stand my belly.I think I look permanently pregnant.Not good when your 50yrs old.
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Just want to add a bit about that chest wall tightness since I've had it from the beginning as well as a bit of tenderness right along my scars. I just assumed it was related to the scars and have been massaging them and the surrounding tissue whenever I feel either tight or tender, usually first thing in the morning. Then I'm usually good for the rest of the day. If not, a quick reach under my shirt and some local skin stretching does it for me. Over the months, some of the tightness has gone away. It's kind of a bummer to think it will be with me longer.
Weight and belly fat must be the issue that never goes away. Well, maybe it would if the belly did. LOL My DH has been in and out of the hospital lately and some of the weight I had dropped came right back. Just popped right back on my belly and hips. Sigh. You ladies inspire me to keep working at it cause permanently pregnant doesn't look or feel any better at 61. Not to mention the consequences to our health of that extra weight.
Judy, an increasing sense of confidence is part of the bc process, I think, but it takes time and practice just like any skill. I've found behaving as if I have it works really well to actually make it happen. At some point I just stopped thinking about it and it became a part of me. Life is sooo much easier.
I have to wonder how similar this process is to adolescence when body image was so central to who we were. We didn't realize how gorgeous we were then (I sure didn't) and maybe we just need to remind ourselves that we still are beautiful. Now I'm wondering if there is any correlation with how we worked through those adolescent body image issues and how we work through the changes that MX creates. That would be an interesting study if it hasn't already been done.0 -
I had a horrid body image growing up as I was a 38D at 14 years old! Was teased incessantly for my large chest. I grew up when "painters" smocks were in style and just looked pregnant all the time...sigh. Is that why I'm handling losing them so well?
As for confidence:
Fake it till you make it!
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I can relate to the horrible body image at 14. What a difficult time that is. I was so flat and stick thin I was teased all the time even though Twiggy was a top model then. I remained flat way into my late thirties when I quit smoking then gained 20 pounds and developed boobs. The only other time in my life I had boobs was when I was pregnant and pretty soon the belly overtook the boobs so they pretty much were a non event except for being sore and in the way. I've been thinking that probably is why losing them has been comparatively easy. I had already gone through 2/3's of my life without them so readjusting has been pretty smooth. I still think this would make a great study for a masters level nursing student.
Confidence is such an amazing thing. It's all interior and we get it from experience and how we process the world's response to our exterior. I agree absolute: fake til you make it!
Barbe, I sure can see why you do well in sales. You are really good at putting yourself out there, girlfriend. Thanks for helping me along on this journey we share. And I do remember those smocks. The first time I wore one in college, my boyfriend took one look at me and ran out of the room screaming it wasn't him. hee hee hee
Linda0 -
Thank you all.
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Several years ago, I took off 60 pounds and managed to keep it off for 4 or 5 years. Then last year...........a pretty stressful year (and I'm definitely a stress eater) I gained it all back. Unfortunately, I now have this huge spare tire! Maybe it was large before and I'm just not remembering correctly, but I did hear Dr Oz say recently that if a woman has a disproportionate amount of belly fat, it's likely caused by stress. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it! Anyhow, going comando would be a lot easier if I wasn't lugging around the spare tire.0
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Belly fat in women is caused by excess Corisol, which is brought on by stress. I find that I stand differently without breasts so I look thinner even though I haven't lost weight!
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I guess I am full of Corisol instead of ### HE HE
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Cortisol is VERY heavy....
(it CAUSES the weight gain, it isn't THE weight you silly goose!)
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I can say that to Mum because we're meeting AGAIN next Friday for dinner.....we's be buds.
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I am only 5'4 so my belly makes me look permanantly pregnant. But it has given me extra incentive to loose weight.
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I'm only 5 4 3/4 inches! You'll start to stand differently Mum. I haven't lost weight but look like I have.
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Barbe,
At the risk of being too repetitive, I'll ask you to put in a few more pics. You are a very good example of someone who is not built like the standard model, but who looks fabulous in clothes, and I think a few more of your pics would be encouraging to those who don't see yet just how attractive they can look too.
I won't be putting bathing suit pictures online, but I have been going to water aerobics classes at the Y. At first I wore the tankini I bought this summer, but today I got brave and wore the modest Speedo I had cut the "cups" out of, because they were so wrinkly. It really worked well for the activity, and I almost don't think about being concave any more. There is so much more to worry about in this world!
Dawn
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Amazing women! All of you! I am wearing my forms every day now.
Judy x
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I cut the foam forms out of my bathing suits too!
My memory card drive is not working right now but should be repaired within the week as the part FINALLY came in.
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Great, Barbe!
Dawn
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My friend sewed pockets in her tank top (as underwear) and it looks great under clothes.
"Not knowing when the dawn is coming, I open every door." -- Emily Dickinson
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Lucy, is this the TLC camisole you didn't like? I have one and rather like it and the way the shelf bra is only on the front.
http://tlcdirect.org/products/sku-8067_dept-15.html
Hopefully I got the link right, but if not, it's the cami with lace across the top called Cool Comfort.
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I thought I would post this link. You'll have to cut and paste it into your browser. I love the creativity of the designer.
http://www.chikaradesign.com/flash.html
~elaine~
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Bumping up this fantastic thread.
~elaine~
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I think somebody else mentioned this but I've forgotten.
Is there a blouse/shirt with safari pockets that I can stuff? I was small breasted to begin with so I don't need much but I do need something.
I was wondering if Speigel or Eddie Bauer catalogs had this kind of normal clothing we bilats could stuff.
Molly
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Molly, you may find that just the fact that the pockets are there is enough to cover your "flatness". I was pretty big, but have a T-shirt with flap pockets and no one seems to notice I'm flat!
Anything with an elastic waist is safe, too, as it puffs up and disguises both belly and chest.
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BoobsinaBox, I love your name!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am about to have a dbl/mast with no reconstruction this Monday, the 25th of Jan., and look forward to the eventual feeling of "breast free" and not "breastless". I plan to have plenty of boobless days. I have thought of vests in the winter and blouses over tees in the summer. I look forward to getting on this blog again. I am not looking forward to the recovery time, and probably radiation following, but hope to eventually get back on here. I am so impressed and encouraged by all that I've read here. Thanks so much,
Latricia
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Thanks, Latriciadawn! My d-i-l started it when I took my boxes into her house when we were visiting. She laughed, "boobs is a box"! and then when I joined BC.org I chose that name. My boobs - or foobs - are all in boxes now that I don't wear them again. I hope your recovery goes quickly and smoothly and that you will find your own new normal and be happy again. This is a great site, as is our bc sister Barbara's (screen name Erica) non-profit site www.BreastFree.org, which has all kinds of info to help in this process.
Dawn
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Latricia - good luck for the 25th! We look forward to hearing of your quick recovery.
I haven't posted here for quite a while. I am now almost 6 months pfc and wear my forms every day. I am finding them quite comfortable. I am still not sure about reconstruction. I am holding off on that decision fro the moment.
Hope everyone is doing ok on this thread.
Take care all, Judy xoxox
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oh...mumayan...i'm so on the losing weight train!...that's the first thing i noticed when i got home from the hospital and had my wits about me...i was, "where on earth did that huge pooch come from?!?!"...interesting how much farther out it protrudes when there are not boobs to even the score!...mom2two - during the cooler weather i almost always wear a zipper hoodie over whatever i'm wearing when i go out...it seems to add a layer of dimension so i'm not self conscience...i haven't ventured out yet in just a single layer shirt, although i might wear just a sweatshirt...it just takes some getting used to...
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cathi...I'm new to this site. Had a bi mas in sept 09 and have since then been doing chemo. Six months of that, my last tx is feb 10th. I will then start radiation for 6 weeks. This is extremely difficult and lets face it discouraging...I too have tried to wear fake boobies and they are so uncomfortable. I guess im just to sensitive still. So I was feelin a bit down at the prospect of going boobless. But your beautiful pictures brought tears to my eyes. Your so right...sexy is not defined by the size of your tatas. You rock!! Thanks
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Iinincinn,
I'm so glad the pics help. Of course, time and healing help the most, but this site has been a big help. And this thread has really been an encouragement for me!
Dawn
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linincinn - It took a while before my forms were comfortable, but now they feel like a regular bra.
Whatever decision you make - it all just takes time : )
Hugs to all, Judy xoxox
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I just discovered this site -what a relief ! Finally! Thank you all for sharing your hearts and thoughts on this sensitive topic.
I had a bilateral mastectomy in March of 2008. I too was undecided about reconstruction. Other women I know were recommending it, but I was skeptical, and medically, I was advised not to start recon until completion of 33 radiation sessions. Long story short, I tried the breast forms, and found them uncomfortable after surgery. My incision sites and skin were sensitive, and I felt like every one was looking at my chest. I liked not wearing a bra (less laundry too).
I think this is a very personal decision. Going breast free was not an easy decision, but there are many ways to live fully without breasts. No one wants a breast cancer diagnosis or mastectomy, but the reality is it happens to the best of us. What we CAN control is how we define ourselves, and not let cancer define us.
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