The dumbest things people have said to you/about you
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OMG. You gals just made my day!
I am stunned. I feel mid-way between laughing and crying tears of joy.
Wow. These days it often seems hard to feel that people fully "get" things I'm dealing with. I can't tell you how AMAZING it feels to read your replies!
You gals f-ing ROCK! I feel like I have a street crew or body guards or something! :-) So cute.
Yeah, I think this whole bc experience is turning me into a real letter-writer! All my doctors got nice holiday thank you cards, and I have at least 2 very serious letters that will be sent out soon (one to this woman's boss, and one to the original doctor that saw me, never examined me, and chalked it all up to "breastfeeding" even though I don't have children). ;-)
Wow again. Thanks so much for the replies!
I love this thread, by the way, it's been my favorite since I first joined the board. Because there are SO many potential examples of this stuff... and at the end of the day what else can we do but vent and laugh about it? (Well, actually, mentally tossing them under buses doesn't hur too much either!) ;-)
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Well, I have a dental hygienist who is (I think) somewhat looney. He knows about all my health problems, including my LCIS. I have not researched this, but he claims in the movie 'The Gerson Miracle', that Gerson was a guy in the early 1900s that came up with some sort of remedy and 'It cured even advanced 'incurable' cancer 100% and not just cancer.' Oh boy, from their website, The Gerson Therapy is a safe, natural treatment developed by Dr. Max Gerson in the 1920’s that uses organic foods, juicing, coffee enemas, detoxification and natural supplements to activate the body’s ability to heal itself. Over the past 60 years, thousands of people have used the Gerson Therapy to recover from so-called “incurable” diseases such as cancer, diabetes, heart disease and arthritis.
Now, of course, I have nothing against organic foods or juicing, I even eat organic foods myself on a regular basis. I think it will be a very, very long time before I do a coffee enema voluntarily. And I do not believe eating organic and juicing will cure everyone's cancer.
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TUNDRA: i had problems with getting a wig with 2-3 centers. the American Cancer Society was one of them. couldnt give me a red one.. that colors so Passe" with a little knowing smile.. {{{{sigh}}} anyway, Looking Godod, Feel Better where i am gives out wigs.. plural to anyone who needs them. get one at every session; and they had many to choose from. polease look into them. they give you makeupo; and lessons, its fun, as well...
as far as the bus, plus the band, plus sumpo wrestlers, i dunno.. but im sure i can fins a special bus.. somewhere. i need to switch computers, so watch for it, ladies..
do report that woman, Tundra. i did when Iencountered them. the hair situation is fraught with emotions for all of us; and they really need someone with a brain, and compassion for that job!! think of the ladies to go to her in the futeure, and write the letter! 3jays
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so, there.s the bus...3jays 0 -
a marching band.. 0 -
..and your'e sumo wrestlers whew!! 3jays..hope it helps, girl.. 0 -
smile_on - it took courage to take the hurt and walk away, well done. And yes, she would be off my guest list too!
riley702 - 'well, that's one less for your list' - LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL ROFL.
3jays - the bus - always makes me giggle!
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Tundra - your comment "I feel like I have a street crew or body guards or something" brought a picture to my mind which made me laugh. A whole bunch of us, all different shapes, sizes and ages in hip-hop clothing, swaggering down the street, snapping our fingers and sneering at all the fools on the side walk.
Something new to keep my mind occupied while at Zumba class - instead of imagining myself hiking up my dress and doing some wild moves at my daughter's wedding, I can imagine some gangsta hip hop moves in defense of my sistas!!!
Julie E
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Go for it Julie! I had to laugh at the picture you painted, too funny.0
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Oh man - love the sumo wrestlers pic! And the marching band. I"m thinking multiple marching bands in a parade! But my favorite image is the caravan of the football team repeatedly running these folks over.
SmileOn - Definitely one less for your list. I have so many things I'd love say to that one but of course at the baby shower you can't cause a scene. And if she is dear Aunt Sadie and your family insists on her being invited, make sure she is in wedding reception Siberia. For old folks this is a table far from the table of honor and next to the band or in front of the blaring speakers. For younger folks, as far from the bar as possible.
Annie
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Julie,
Yah, that's kind of how I pictured it! :-)
Would kind of bring people a different impression than the whole pink ribbon thing eh? ;-) hehhehe.
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Smile_on- yeah I think she's off the guest list... cause you know her social calendar is more important than your breast reconstruction surgery... I swear it seems like you use breast and surgery in the same sentence and people just lump it in the same category as someone getting breast implants for cosmetic reasons- as if its a totally elective procedure you're just doing for the sake of your vanity!
I agree with Annie - if you can't get out of inviting them- stick them in front of a speaker far away from the bar! or maybe next to your least favorite relative- the one who talks peoples ears off about their latest medical problem.
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Especially next to the relative who talks people's ears off about their latest medical problem! How else will they learn to be sympathetic to those with medical problems?
Or, put another way - how else will they learn that lack of sympathy is a problem in itself?
Leah
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Leaf p=one of my friends recently posted a video on Facebook of a women who had her metastatic bc cured by the Gerson therapy- good for her, but I think for everyone of her there are a handful at least who eschew conventional medicine in the hopes of a miracle cure who end up with disease progression.
Don't get me wrong- I wholeheartedly support alternative medicine and I think there are alot of issues that conventional medicine just doesn't have any help for- or it just treats the symptoms and not the underlying cause. But this women on the video flat out said chemo didn't work and I had to comment and say well I've heard tons of stories of women on this board who did neoadjuvant chemo and had complete response- so um yeah it does! Just because it doesn't work for everyone... well I don't think the Gerson thing does either.
I have to admit if I was ever diagnosed with a recurrence I would be willing to try a lot of things- including a coffee enema. But I wouldn't forego conventional medicine.
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It was probably the residual result of her chemo that "cured" her not the coffee enema!
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I had the same "conversation" with a woman on facebook, she popped up in the comments on something, claiming up and loud that some "natural" cure got her rid of ovarian cancer. When I started questioning her, she said she had had surgery, chemo and radiation, but she is sure that the"miracle cure" was the one that "cured" her. Doi!
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So far, I've been fortunate to not have had many dumb comments but here is one for the books...my co worker and I were discussing the tops we were wearing that day.
She (large breasts, large mouth): "Boob are overrated."
Me (small breasts, large mouth): Until you have to have part of one removed."
She still didn't get it. I wish I could have come up with a snappier response but I was caught so off guard that all I could do was look at her with the WTF face. Gina
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The woman in the video didn't have chemo. She was dx with breast cancer and had mets to her lungs and inoperable lymph nodes- showed a pic of her PET scan . She started the Gerson therapy immediately and when she went in a month later for the surgery or whatever, the cancer was gone. So in her case she didn't undergo any conventional therapy and just stuck with the Gerson.
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Gina -Marie-Antoinette is generally credited with the phrase, "Let them eat cake". She is reviled in history for this statement which indicated she understood little about the plight of the poor and cared even less.
Your co-worker shows similiar leanings.
Under the bus, I say!!!!
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Well I've been reading and laughing at everything but blessed by non-idiots in my life the past few weeks....until today..........
My boss (a woman) was talking to several of us about women being overly "endowed" as she put it. Then she turned to me and said, well you don't have that problem any more though honey!
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Ok, how do you address the comment of "you are my hero" from a person who just joined a social stitching group and after finding out your diagnosis, just blurts that out. I had to take a good friend of mine outside ( and it was FREEZING cold to me anyway) and just yell. I DID NOT SIGN UP TO BE A HERO! I just want to be well and have this hell over with. It's not like I am a soldier or an athlete who does something spectacular.
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beccad
The same thing was said to me by the scheduler for my mammagram.
I didn't know what to say - then she said - wait a minute my mascara is dripping lol
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The day I was having my double mast (cancer already confirmed) the volunteer came back into the green room where family could still sit with us gowned-up patients and said very loudly "Who was it I told to take their underwear off? You can keep it on. Oh, there you are!" Then she stood in front of me and told me that she "had what you have and here I am 22 years later!!". I'm sure everyone is wondering what I "had". My room-mate the first night was in the room at the same time and everyone was SOOOOOOO embarrassed for me and thought I acted with such class. I guess I was just too stunned to respond!
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Barbe ... <sigh> I am stunned. What is it, with those volunteers? Do they not have a clue? (I thought hospital volunteers had to go through training sessions before they were allowed to interact with patients.)
I have something I want to say, and I am hoping I can say it here without offending very many people. This thread has a colorful history, so I think I might be safe.
In response to some of the comments and PM's I've seen lately, and in the spirit of a thread that has appeared in the "Surveys" section of these boards, I am going to say: "Please keep your positive attitude out of my face!!!".
Now I feel much better. Thank you for your time.
otter
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Oooooo, you said it SO well Otter!!! I HATE hearing "stay strong" and all that crap!!! I just answered a friend who is Stage IV by saying "I am scared for you too!"
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I swear the next time I get the "Stay positive" line from someone I'm going to respond with "Oh, is that how cancer is cured now?" Or maybe "How positive do I have to be to get back the 3 years of my life treatment ruined?" Or "How positive do I have to be to get my own breasts, the ones with feeling, back?" Good Lord, save me from the Positive PollyAnnas out there!
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Or "I've often wondered if I should have been more positive and had fewer mammograms."
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I HATE the "you're my hero", you're so brave, such a fighter crap!!! All I did was show up and endure everything. People who aren't going through what you are going through- from their outside point of view- they think- Well I don't think I could handle what she's going through- so she must be so brave. Like I had a choice! I just think that people don't get that you just do what you have to do.
Sometimes I wonder what things I did that made people think I was so brave. I tried to make the best of a bad sitation- I had a head shaving party rather than crying in the shower when my hair fell out. I posted pics of my bald head on facebook. I still tried to have a social life and attend functions. I don't see anything I did as brave.
its like if you are dx with cancer and you don't just lay down and die right there- then you are automatically labeled brave.
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So ladies, what is the alternative to having a positive attitude, being miserable for the rest of your life and making others around you miserable, too??? Do you think we are the only ones dealt with a raw deal. My friend's son just came back from Iraq with both legs blown away plus his left arm and I have never seen anyone more positive than him. My family and I just came back from his fundraiser in Valparaiso, IN. He said he would go back and defend his country again. I lost both of my breasts to cancer but I can still walk, run and throw a curve ball. I treasure positive attitudes and will continue to have one of my own.
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