Ladies in their 30s
Comments
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HI Meekone: Sorry to read about your sad experience. Just remember cancer does not occur overnight, it has taken many months for the cells to finally become cancerous, so you have TIME to think. Don't make any hasty decisions, and you can always decide to have chemo after 2 months after surgery, there is no rush. many patients believe they have "to get the disease out", truth of the matter is that it's been there for awhile, so feeling overwhelmed is normal, just get different opinions, and see what suits you...Goodluck ...xox
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Meekone, second opinions are good....if you are not feeling 100% support with your current dr's then find another...It took my second opinion for me to know i was on the right path! i knew something wasn't sitting well with me the first go around..
Know that this is a great place to come vent, scream, cry, or just talk...all these ladies have helped me get thru these long nights of stress and worry...I completely understand trying to get all the information as possible, i did and still do the same...Take one day at a time....and breath...we are all here to listen and talk...pm me any time! your in my thoughts and prayers
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Hi Meekone: the girls are right, there's no hurry and it sounds like you are researching and giving yourself the right ammunition to question everything to be happy with your decision. I would be asking myself this: If it's 'recommended' that I do chemo/rads/etc etc and I decide not to, how much could I regret this in later years? It's a hard one but I prefer to throw everything we medically have right now at it rather than go through this crap ever again (which may never happen).. Good luck with your decision Meek.
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Thanks ladies, that is exactly how I have been trying to work through this process, if I in fact refuse to do a certain treatment how will it effect me in ten years or so. Seems like all of the decisions we make (or at least in my case) appears to be to reduce the stats and probabilities, and I know that is what it is all about. Wow, I have become a stat!
I know that it is a very Strong likely hood that I will be doing chemo, I just want to understand it a little better. Have you guys ever felt like sometimes you have to much information and that you can possibly get in your own way? And you guys are right, I want to be as aggressive as possible right now to reduce the possibility of it returning. Its just happening so fast. I think yesterday I had a little melt down, surgery is on Monday, today is a little better......one day at a time. Thanks again.\
Meek
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Yes, Meek, the info thrown at you in the beginning is overwhelming. So much to process. It does get better, though, once you have a plan in place. The whirlwind in the beginning can be dizzying, so a step back and some calming breaths do help. Good luck!
Sherrill0 -
My 2nd opinion went great!!! here is my blog if you are interested in reading all about it. http://hewillcarrymethrough.blogspot.com
I am so much more at ease about the whole thing!!!
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Anyone hear from Lady Madonna lately? Hope she's okay
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i am 39 yrs old and recently had a BMX. I have great respect for you women who have young children. I have one son who is 12 and is having a hard time with this. He keeps me busy.
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I had a thought recently, thought I'd see if anyone has had the same. Part of why I feel so devastated being diagnosed so young is I really can't think of anyone in my peer group who has a major health problem, cancer or otherwise and it just seems so unreal that I was the first. Why me?
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Alyad: (((HUGS)))
I don't know anyone this young that has it either. I just lean on this group for support. We could ask the questions forever and never have the reason. When my sister asked "why you?" I told her "Because I am strong enough to handle it." Same goes for you Alyad. We may never know the reason but know that you are strong enough to get through this. Not sure of your beliefs but I believe that God gave this to me for a reason an I have seen some benefits from it already. I have a renewed relationship with my biological dad. I have seen him 2x since I was a little kid! It is amazing!! Lean on those around you and on us. We will all get through this!!
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Thanks Kerri, I am through it all already and mostly just dealing with the post BC fallout- trying to get back to normal and realizing normal is different now.
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I'm mentally exhausted. I have to remind my family members that I have stage 4 cancer, that most of my bones in my body and liver have cancer, just so they can help out. I've always done everything, so it's my fault. I try to put on a brave face for my 5 children, but I'm tired, so so tired....
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(((HUGS))) Kouragio hang in there girl and let others help.
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Hi Ladies - I wanted to introduce myself (and hopefully join along in this thread)! My name is Sandy and I was diagnosed last June at age 31. Since than I've had a lumpectomy, 6 rounds of chemo and am finishing my last week of radiation. I wanted to let you ladies know I've been following this thread for a while and it's been a great comfort to me. I have yet to come across anyone my age during treatments (which is actually a great thing) but it sometimes leaves me feeling alone. It's nice to know there's other like me out there facing the same battles!
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Sheuber, I was also diagnosed at 31 in November, now im 32, Started Chemo at the beginning of January. Neoadjuvant ...chemo first, surgery and then rads...this site has help out a bunch, it gets me thru my late nights and worries!
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anyone doing taxotere....i got three more to go and ill be done
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Hi all,
Also wanted to say hi. I was diagnosed last summer at 35 and I'm about to finish up chemo.
Coni, I am doing Taxotere now after 4 AC and then an allergic reaction to Taxol. I am not particularly fond of Taxotere -- I have a lot of annoying side effects and they last a very long time. But it will be over soon.
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Coni - I did 3 rounds of taxotere (after 3 of FEC). I found taxotere easier in some ways and harder in others. With the FEC my stomach was always upset and my insides felt rotten. My mind was also really foggy. With the taxotere, I didn't have any nausea and my head was clear but after my first treatment I ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks. My immune system was whipped out and I caught a rare bug (which was resistant to antibiotics). I also had wicked bone pain (had a hard time standing) and food and water tasted really funny (like eating sand). That being said, my second and third treatment of taxotere were a breeze. They gave me pain killers for the bone pain and I started taking shots of Neulasta (which causes the body to produce more white/red blood cells so you don't become neutropenic). To combat the food tastes, I put crystal light in water and ate a lot of applesauce and bananas.
Beeb75 - I'm sending you a big congratulations hug on almost being done chemo! It's a great feeling to put it behind you. I've got 1 more week of radiation to go and I can't wait to be done. Every day that passes since chemo I feel stronger and stronger. The hardest thing after finishing chemo was wanting my old life back immediately and having to be patient still. But like they say, good things come to those who wait.
Melissa - it great to meet you! Since starting treatments, I haven't met anyone else my age (which is actually a really good thing). It's nice to know there's other 32 year olds out there. I wish you all the best with the rest of your treatments!
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Hi everybody,
I'm 34 and was just diagnosed. I had mastectomy almost 3 weeks ago. I'll start chemo in the next few weeks. You're all in my prayers.
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Welcome braveheart sorry u had to join this club...
Sheuber....yes I do get the pain on my joints lasts about 3-4 days oh and spams on my back. Really bad, sore throat and mouth sores, thrush...I got it all, also getting the neaulasta shots too..I didnt get the pain killers onc said to continue with steroids but I find that it upsets my stomach even more..so i had lots of pain.....are u in Ontario?
Beeb75 how many more u have left, I got three more to go well after next Friday I'll be half way done with taxotere and then moving on to surgery0 -
Hi there,
I have one Taxotere left (next week). I'll have my exchange surgery (switch expanders for implants) at the end of March. Yes, I'm really looking forward to the end of chemo! I still have to decide about radiation. I had a MX so it's not a given and with 1 node positive, I am in the "grey area." Did anyone else have this situation? My rad onc recommended breast radiation only (not axilla or supraclavicular area) but he seemed a little wishy-washy about it. Like it might be overkill?
The one nice thing about Taxotere is that my hair has started to grow. Very slowly, but definitely noticeably.
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beeb75 - I was in the grey area for rad's as I had a thin margin near my nipple. I decided to decline rad's since the thin margin was not near the chest wall but closer to the surface. I am trusting that chemo got it all. The rad's onc was really pushing for rads for me because 'you're young and handled chemo well'. That was not a good enough reason for me.
What is important is that you are comfortable with whatever decision you make.
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Hi Coni - yes I'm an Ontario girl. I live in Mississauga (getting treatment at St. Joes and Princess Margaret). Where are you?
Braveheart - welcome! I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis and hope you're healing well from your surgery. I wish you all the best through your upcoming chemo treatments.
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I'm in Ottawa!! Are u getting rads? My home nurse told me she wouldn't cause it can cause cancer in other places, radiation stay in the body for a long time... They told the same thing to my father in law he had cancer a few yrs ago, but they said cancer could be in like 20-25 that puts him at 75-80 yrs old, but 20-25 for me us at 50-55 still too young... So just wondering if we all have to do radiation
How about your hair did it continue growing while on taxotere I have some stubble left from AC... I was 31 when I was diagnose, I'm doing 8 cycles 4 ac 4 taxotere..did u have surgery first or chemo... I had chemo but I Want to know why I need Sooo much chemo? I'm going to talk to onc mon...0 -
Hi Coni - I sent you a personal message (check your in-box)!
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Michelle - I wish I had your determination! My radiation oncologist didn't give me much of a choice as far as radiation goes. She said because I was node positive (1 out of 11), I should move forward with radiation. When I asked her about any alternatives, she said a mastectomy. But even than, she said she would still "strongly recommend" radiation. When I asked her about the long term effects, she said I'd be better off focusing on getting through the next 5 years instead of long term. Totally unfair as I'd like to be healthy in 30 years as well!
Beeb75 - my hair has started growing as well (I'm 2 months out from chemo). I've got this wicked bald patch at the front and back though (like mail pattern baldness). How's yours coming in?
Coni - just realize from your earlier post you mentioned you've already started taxotere. I'm sorry to hear you're having such bad side effects. I was given a prescription for hydromorphone 1mg and it helped big time. I hate taking medication (always have) but this is one that definitely was worth it. It didn't make me feel drugged at all and just took the bone pain away. The steroids were the worst part for me - I hated them too! I swear they caused just as much stomach pain as the chemo. As far as the mouth sores go, I found if I constantly kept ice in my mouth it helped. I also switched my toothpaste to sensodyne (which I believed helped). Watch out though - when I tried to switch back to my regular toothpaste once chemo was done my teeth were super sensitive (and I never had that problem before). Now I'm stuck using the sensitive toothpaste forever!
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sheuber- I sent you two lol
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Hi All! I'm 37 and was dx in November 2010. I had a BMX in December and am in the midst of DD ACx4 followed by Tx4. Chemo has not been fun, but thankfully it's been tolerable! Having 2 positive nodes I, too, am in the gray area for radiation. My BS went ahead and did the AND during the BMX so it's very likely we got everything with one surgery. My oncologist is actually making some calls to collect some other opinions about rads. Everything seems to come back to the fact "You're so young!" Not a day goes by that I don't question, "Why me?" I've spent over the 5 of the last 10 years pregnant and/or breastfeeding. I find myself being really angry at my body for letting me down like this!!!
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Hello sisters!
I'd like to join to this group of wonderful girls as well
I'm not so happy to meet you here, but you don't know how big support you have given to me already! For the first and certainly not the last time I must apologise because of my poor english (I live in Central Europe), I must learn the abbreveations as well.I'm 35, have 2 beautiful daughters (3 and 5 years old). I had the diagnosis right before Xmas, lumpectomy 3 weeks ago. The sentinel node was negative intraoperatively, but unfortunately the hystology showed micrometasis, so I'll have axillary node dissection next week. Then chemo and radio and hormontherapy as weel. So I will get everything...
I'm lucky, because I don't have to work and I have a very supportive family and a great husband.
I've changed lifestyle - I sleep in the evenings
, I do sport every day, I try to eat haelthy, but this is the hardest, because I can't always decide which food is healthy enough.Now I'm always sitting in front of the monitor and read and read, and I'm full of information, it's getting to be so boring and sad. Hard to decide what to be the perfect for me. Who is a good doctor? I work against time permanently - I have to wait for everything (surgery, path diagnosis, again surgery) a lot, and this is worst: happening something bad is better, than just happening nothing!
Sometimes I'm angry as weel, because instead of going for skiing with our friend I have to sit here, because I'm constantly worrying about my parents, who look really bad, I worry about my 5-year-old daughter, who sits on my lap, and cry and sais "mommy I worry about you very much, everything will be ok?" (I did'n say any frightening, but she knows from the faces and I don't konw how, that the problem is serious). I want to be with my daughters, when they have babies and I want to help them, like my mother did and does it. So I have to live at least 35-40 years more! and we will!!
But I think anger is good, it gives me more strength - Tsundermann, I think you become even stronger with anger! and love your body, it needs help from you:)
I decided to love my breast and my lympnodes, maybe it sounds foolish, but it helped me to accept my body with the disease.
You know the one person, for whom I fear the least is myself. Maybe I will be not so positive a few weeks later, but you will be here to comfort me, won't you?
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In my humble opinion, no diet or exercise can quell stress. There are a lot of things they think can cause the "perfect storm" for cancer. For me, whatever the doctors say, I am clear that the past five years of extreme, constant stress was a tipping point for me. Now that I have gotten past some crazy times in my life, things don't phase me the same. My veg diet and exercise didn't save me before, I hope that with stress reduction and agressive screening, I will catch this early when it rears its head again...
And yes! Loving your body for giving you what it has already is such a good attitude. I've decided to do the same. All the anger, fear and resentment is just no good for us. 40 years is a lot more than many people get, why am I complaining??
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