Ladies in their 30s
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Hello ladies- I'm doing research to better understand needs and wants of other survivors throughout their journey. Would love your help by answering a quick 3 question survey on products you have found to be a big win or big flop. I appreciate all your honest feedback.
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Hi ladies...I'm 2 years out from finishing chemo. My treatment team has scheduled a chest CT (routine to follow up on tiny lung nodules that were on my original and post-chemo CT - but were unchanged) for next week. They've told me not to worry, it’s just routine,but how do you not? Anxiety has set in and I feel like I'm reliving those early days/weeks post-diagnosis...
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Hi Countrygirl- sending hugs and best wishes your way. The fact that the nodules are not new and have not changed should encourage you. I guess anxiety will always creep in everytime we are assessed. Hoping for a good outcome for you!
I will also be doing baseline scans after completing radiation.
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Thank you, Palesa...I’m ashamed to admit, that I’ve put way to much energy into worrying about it.
Hugs to you as you finish radiation and move forward with your journey. Light and love
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Countrygirl, I also had some nodes seen on my lungs in a scan last year. It turned out to be scarring from pneumonia that had me in the hospital (caught it a week after finishing chemo!). They show up to this day and sometimes the size changes very slightly. My doctor said this could be because I’m in a slightly different position from the last scan, the nodes aren’t perfectly round so at different slices it can catch a wider profile, and always the human factor as a technician is the one who clicks the 2 points of measurement. I always worry they will tell me these have changed, but I try not to spend my emotions on what if’s. If it turns out to be bad I’ll worry the because the what if’s can lead you down an entirely made up world of worrying you don’t need. My advice is to repeat what you do know, facts, and positive thinking (I hate when ppl tell me this but damnit it’s true). Good luck
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So I guess I'm part of this team now... As someone who was always, always chosen last for team like situations as a kid I have to say I'm not really digging being part of the early picks right now.
I just turned 34 last month. I have three amazing kids and three equally amazing step kids and a new husband and a cat who rules the household.
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34, dx about ten days after my birthday..
IDC < 2cm, Er+/PR+,HER2-
Just had my lumpectomy three days ago + sentinal node biopsy.. even though dr was positive she could get clear margins without touching my muscle, she ended up removing a bit of muscle during surgery.. not sure what this means in terms of treatment. Also removed 3 nodes through SNB..
Is chemo a must for under 40s? Or if the lumpectomy comes clear radiation + hormone therapy sufficient?
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Raysal:
Whether or not chemotherapy is indicated depends on the specifics of your cancer.
Mine was larger than half a centimeter, HER2 positive and aggressive so chemo was necessary. With HER2 negative, hormone receptor positive IDC, sometimes they do oncotyping and use the oncoscore to determine of chemotherapy is indicated. With triple negative IDC, I think chemotherapy is typically indicated.
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raysal- My MO wanted me to do chemo. I got a second opinion and Oncotype and ended up with just rads + Tamoxifen + ovarian suppression. I’ve since stopped OS. Not sure what my next steps are in that department...MO wants ooph. Chemo will likely be offered to you.
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Chemo was one of my only options, however, if I wasn’t I still think i would opt to do it. I didn’t want to look back and regret not doing everything I could and then be left in a worse situation. Didn’t know I would have a recurrence or mets, but I’m still glad I did all I could with the knowledge I had. At the end of the day you have to do what’s right for you and what you can live with in your heart and mind. In the beginning it’s so rough because so much information is coming your way and you are also in the middle of grieving your health and having to make big decisions rather quickly (at least i felt this way). Take time and learn about your type of cancer and the options out there. For me it helped to keep up with the medics lingo and treating onc was talking about. It allowed me to bring up concerns about chemo and what my other options might be and why we were choosing the path we did.
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Hi Ladies!
I’m a 32 year old single mom to a 6 year old daughter. I was diagnosed with IDC Stage 2 Er+/Pr+/HER2+ on 9/19/18. I just started standard dose neoadjuvant AC on 10/19/18. I just found out earlier that two more malignant masses were found, making my cancer multicentric. If the neoadjuvant chemo doesn’t eliminate the two smaller masses, I may not be a candidate for a lumpectomy.
It’s crazy that I didn’t really want more kids, but the possibility of losing the option to have more scares me a little. There are just so many important decisions that need to be made so quickly.
How are you ladies handling your careers? I feel like this happened as soon as I was given a new career advancing opportunity at work. Now that’s on hold because I’d never be able to manage extra work, my normal 50 hour work week, treatments, AND single parenthood. Anybody else feeling overwhelmed?0 -
JS0404 I have no idea how I’m going to keep working but not working really isn’t an option. I’m the primary provider for my kids and my work doesn’t offer short term disability coverage. I love my job. I just started it this year and it was a massive promotion for me, slowing down on it or taking any kind of leave that might alter my career path almost makes me feel worse than the knowledge that I have cancer. My ability to work and earn a living and provide for my family is a huge part of me. I’m having to give up my second job because I know it will be too much to handle. I too feel incredibly overwhelmed by all the things that have to be done
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Hi JS0404:
I was wondering, are you also on herceptin and perjeta? And why AC instead of taxotere/ taxol and carboplatin?
I have triple positive BC and was on TCHP, taxotere, carboplatin, herceptin, perjeta. My facility does not do AC with herceptin because it carries a greater risk of heart damage.
Sometimes life just doesn't go how we would like. I couldn't manage working during chemo because of the nature of my job. I just decided this was really the time to focus on my health and particularly getting enough sleep.
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Hazel-Nut- I totally get the stress about working. Luckily, I have short term disability, so I'm in the process of getting all the paperwork turned in. Hopefully, it will be approved. I only have about a week and a half of sick time left and I can't afford unpaid leave. People keep telling me that work should be the least of my worries, but they don't have to worry about providing for a small child. Hopefully, everything works out with the disability. Sending positive vibes to you and your family
WC3- I have 4 rounds of AC, then 12 weeks of Taxol with a year of Hercepti and Perjeta. I met with the cardiologist before starting the AC and he said that because of my age and the fact that I am relatively healthy outside of the cancer, I should be ok to proceed with the planned treatment schedule. I'm going to meet with the cardiologist after my second AC cycle and again before I start the THP. They are very strict about patients getting MUGA scans every 90 days and getting clearance from the cardiologist before continuing treatment.
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Hi JS0404 - on the point of managing career, I have continued working full time. I took 3 weeks off work for the BMX other than that no time off, by choice. Like Hazel-Nut I enjoy my work and more importantly feel an even stronger need to provide for my family. Fortunately I did no chemo, Oncotype 12, which makes a difference i imagine, but did insist on radiation which I do at 7am daily before going to work. I also started Zoladex and will be starting Tamoxifen in the next two weeks when I finish rads. It was a personal choice for me. I feel strong enough to work, I do work at it (walking 1 hr daily and taking supplements). I am taking the career opportunities coming my way because of the many many positive stories of people who have gone on to live with the diagnosis and finished their treatment and went on with their lives.
Hoping for great outcomes for everyone on this discussion. Gentle hugs.
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Hi Palesa2018! I originally considered trying to work full time, but after discussing the issue with my manager, we agreed that it would be best for everyone if I just took the time off. Because I’m having neoadjuvant chemo, it’s hard to predict how I’ll be able to function. Being in and out of the office has made my job a living nightmare lol. I end up spending half the day trying to catch up or fix issues that weren’t handled correctly while I was out. Unfortunately, people start cutting corners when they are under staffed. Luckily, there won’t be significant decrease in my income if I take the disability, so I’ll just have to cut some of the unnecessary items in my budget and we should be ok financially.0
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JS0404 I'm glad your employer was able to arrange an appropriate alternative for your work schedule.
I had my appointment this morning with the breast surgeon and RO. The BS gave me a lot more info on my diagnosis and treatment options which was helpful. Apparently I fit into the very small percentage of BC that are classified as metaplastic IDC. I'm feeling like maybe I should play the lottery this week, I obviously have an affinity for attracting unlikely scenarios lol. The BS wants me to meet with a MO to attempt to get in a clinical trial along with neo-adjuvant chemo before pursuing surgical options. I had to laugh when the BS told me that my cancer was not at all easy going and needed to be treated with respect. I have my bone scan scheduled for Thursday and I'm learning to despise any sort of medical testing - nothing ever comes with good news these days. I've had a persistent pain in my left hip for a few weeks and while logically I know it's probably because I've been hitting the gym pretty hard lately it's hard not to let the worry creep into your head.
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Hazel-Nut- Good luck with your tests
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Hi all!
Thought I'd introduce myself. Diagnosed at 33. Halfway through neoadjuvant chemo.
Found my lump earlier this year back in March, but since we were getting ready for our wedding, and I was interviewing for a new job, I kind of just forgot to follow up on it. Got the bad news in August, but everyone was fine with me delaying treatment until after our honeymoon and a work trip I couldn't miss. Anyway, yada yada, I'm here now, getting pumped full of drugs every three weeks! Still working full time, but luckily I work remote and have been able to schedule all my client meetings for my “good" weeks Happily, my MO said today he'd be ok with me accelerating my final treatment by a few days so I can be done before Christmas!
No kids, but I have a 55-lb fur baby, and a supportive husband.
@BT39 - One of my friends was diagnosed a few years ago, at 32. Super aggressive tumor, already spread to one lymph node. She just celebrated three years cancer free.
Don't google anything! There are so many success stories out there, but we only hear about the bad ones.
Good to meet you all, though I'm bummed we're all here!
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Mt, welcome
congrats on the wedding! Doc’s are good about working around the holidays us usually. I just had mine make an exception to my treatment plan so I could do infusion the day after Christmas instead of the day before since there was only a 1 day +\-. Same happened with radiation last year. Finished Tuesday Thanksgiving week! 0 -
I was going to keep working but mentally I cannot. But my surgical oncologist won't write me the leave permission and I haven't met my medical oncologist yet so it looks like I have to take a psychiatric leave. Which I kind of hate. Because it is mental health but it's really about the cancer. But I think I just have to do it. I'm lucky to have the option. It won't be easy financially but I figure that's what savings are for. (Single, no kids). And going to work is making me feel super stressed out. Any other teachers?
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Hi Salamandra
I totally understand what you are going through the mental and emotional part of this cancer journey is the hardest to over come. I teach preschool children and when I found out about my DX last year I had to take a month off from work because I could not focus on anything but what was happening to my body. I was also an emotional basket case. I knew that I could not care for my students instead I needed to take care of myself!
Glad you are taking care of yourself in realizing you need to take this time to focus on you. So sorry to hear that your surgeon want write you a letter to get leave from work did they say why they won't do it? I hope you can find a doctor that will write you the letter you need.
What grade do you teach? What do you love about teaching the most?
We are all here for you for support.
Wishing you well and sending you lots of Hugs!
Take Care,
Sara
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Thank you sm627. It's been really tough and every day that I think, tonight I'm going to submit for leave, I chicken out and think, maybe I can hold out until President's Day, or Thanksgiving, or starting radiation.
I teach special ed high school, mostly co-teaching and one self contained. I lucked out with my self contained class this year and got such a sweet group of kids, and I hate the idea of leaving them with a sub.
I love when a kid asks a question that you can tell they're really thinking about what you're trying to teach.
My admin more or less tacitly gave me permission to phone it in for now (still better for them than getting a sub for me), and I want to be able to make that work. But it's demoralizing, especially with the one of my co-teachers who isn't the greatest communicator...
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I wanted to drop by to let everyone know that I am leaving this thread. I have graduated to the 40's thread. When I was first diagnosed at 35, this group helped me so much. But it's been 4.5 years and I'm doing well, most of the time. To the newbies: it's so overwhelming at first, but you have such a great group here. They are here to help. Lean on them, comfort each other and know that one day you too will be moving on to the 40's thread.
Thank you all for all your support! I couldn't have made it this far without you. Be kind to yourselves and each other.
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Thanks, MeToo. We all hope to join you in the 40s thread in the future!
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only 33. Diagnosed. Numb. trying to stay positive but struggling to do so. Felt lump & went for ultrasound In Oct showed nothing, thought was only fatting tissues. then lump still there and persisted in jan and still not shown up on Ultrasound as a mass , however just shown a "peak" slightly higher than entire tissue. nurse said cant tell what it is from the screen and did Biopsy, confirmed one day after.
I am only 33 and have a young child. I feel so helpless as I want to be with my son for many many years... I dont know what to expect. hope it is early stage and I can be cured after treatments.
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Hello Bestrongforeveryone, I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. Totally understand what you might be feeling in these early days. You will find a lot of support and information in these forums. I'm 39 with two small kids and I experience similar fears. But with time and treatment I feel really positive about the future.
I hope it was caught early for you. Please share more details as you have them.
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bestrongforeveryone, I'm sorry you're going through this. It is very jarring in the beginning - be patient with yourself and kind to yourself as you adjust.
I don't want to overwhelm you at this early point, but I will briefly tell you a couple things I learned that affect younger women: 1.) If you end up needing chemo and you want to have more children, look into fertility preservation options. Do this sooner than later, because the whole process takes time and needs to be coordinated around your other treatments. 2.) If you aren't already at one, get an opinion from an NCI designated cancer center. Young women have a unique breast cancer situation, and it's generally handled better in highly skilled facilities. When you call, you can tell them you've just been diagnosed, and you are seeking a second opinion. See: https://www.cancer.gov/research/nci-role/cancer-centers
I'm wishing you the best. It's not something any of us wanted to do in our 30's, but you are not alone and you can do it.
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Hello everyone,
I am glad to have found this group. I am 38 and was diagnosed in December 2018. I have a husband and no kids. I noticed a lump shortly after my mom went through surgery for DCIS. I have multicentric stage llB invasive ductal carcinoma with lymph node involvement. One tumor is ER/PR+, her2-, and the other is ER/PR-. her2+ (left breast). I am currently in the middle of my 6 cycle chemo treatment (perjeta, herceptin, taxotere, carboplatin). I also chose to do the zoladex shot. I will have surgery after chemo and then radiation.
I have fatigue and appetite loss for a week after each treatment. Also taste changes that improve as the next cycle approaches. My family is very supportive and I do my best to keep a positive attitude and maintain my healthy lifestyle. I do not have the energy for running, but I do elliptical, power walking, and some strength training when my energy levels go back up.
Good luck to everyone!
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