TRIPLE POSITIVE GROUP
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Shore1.....
LOL...I 've done the same. No scrimping anymore! I don't even save letters for the next game on Words with Friends ! I'm in the NOW!0 -
Shore, hmmmm, I never realized there is soy in there, but it makes sense now that I think about it. Let me do some research...I usually prefer to buy my products from Andrew Lessman on HSN because he is a biochemist who knows his stuff. Plus I've researched him on FDA's website and he has a pretty good repuation with them, but I ran out and have been a ditz since my diagnosis. I bought Sundown Naturals Fish Oil (from Rexall Sundown) in my local store (Meijer, which I think is just a mid-west chain). They are in an orange bottle. 1000 mg with 300 mg Omega 3. I don't see soy as an ingredient, but it isn't also stated in the No XXX category, like gluten, starch, etc. They have a number on there you can call (1-888-VITAHELP). If you call, let us know what they say. I think a good dosage is to aim for close to 900 mgs of Omega 3/day, but I'm also seeing it is being supplemented in foods now.
Heck, I'm not used to worrying about soy at all, but since I'm pretty much a vegetarian, I bet my freezer and cupboards are full of it. No wonder I've had no menopausal symptoms over the past 2 years...
Sol, I think one of my biggest fears with the diagnosis was if I would miss out on my Fall gardening. Gardening is really my only big hobby, and I make it almost a year-round one. I don't do a thing during January or February, but I'm back out there in March no matter how cold! I just love digging in the earth and trying to nurture and control mother nature on my 0.22 acres
You make me feel better. I can't wait to be done with this chemical onslaught. Oh, and one of the reasons we are so low on Vitamin D in the US is because sunscreen blocks the synthesis of it in the skin. Who'da thunk it? This nation is full of D deficiency! My company just FDA cleared a blood test for vitamin D and it is selling like crazy. Our doctor customers tell us they rarely see someone who is not deficient.OK, no side effects at all yet from yesterday's first chemo. Is that weird?
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Jenn, one of my favorite "breast cancer experience" stories came from my mother-in-law and it goes like this -
Her aunt found out she had breast cancer at age 50 and lived another 45 years - to the age of 95!
One of the most amazing breast cancer stories I've read came from a letter written in the 1850s. I saw a link to it come up on Twitter a few weeks ago and I've thought about it almost every day since. Here's the link, in case anyone is interested, but be forewarned - it is a harrowing story...
Here's the first paragraph from Letters of Note (a website that originally carried the story):
In September of 1855, Lucy Thurston — a 60-year-old missionary who had been living in Hawaii with her husband since 1820 — underwent a mastectomy after being diagnosed with breast cancer. Incredibly, she somehow endured the operation wide-awake, without any form of anaesthetic. She wrote the following letter to her daughter a month later and described the unimaginably harrowing experience.
The procedure was a success. Lucy Thurston lived for another 21 years.http://www.lettersofnote.com/2012/02/deep-sickness-seized-me.html
Also, I agree- experience is a good word for it.
MsTori - I'm chiming in 100% with what soltantio said in her post:
soltantio: "Mstori, you are NOT a downer. I can tell you’re usually a very upbeat person but sheesh! This is a big deal!" Breast cancer is the downer - you're not!
SpecialK - thanks for the info on the krill!
Moonflwr - great info on the drains - I copied and pasted it into an email to my husband, not because I can't do the drains myself but because he really likes to get everything all organized and keep charts and, well, play doctor/nurse/patient coordinator, etc. I am grateful that he likes doing it and since he seems to like doing it, at least for now, I'm more than happy to let him don the gloves and go to it.
Pbrain, I've been chuckling about this on and off since I first read it this morning:
"Never apologize unless you turn into a raging lunatic and call us all turd muffins or something."
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PBrain (and anyone else!), I would love to see photos of your flowers/gardens. If that veers us off topic too much I guess we could start a Gardening is Therapeutic thread (there may even be one somewhere on this vast site).
I'm looking out on some of my babies right now. I take care of all the potted plants/hanging plants and the gardeners do the in-ground plants (I never had a gardener in the midwest but it seems to be the thing here - so we have one - mainly because there's no way I could handle parts of our property that are uphill and hard to get to, plus, my husband is not a gardening kind of guy).
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I must of missed the downer post because I don't remember reading anything that bummed me out
Vitamin D. I was in the single digits… in spite of all the power walking I was doing. After prescription strength I got up to 30. After that took over the counter total around 2000 (in multivitamin, D3 and with my calcium) got up to 79. That's above normal. So some of us don't need mega doses to improve. That's why you need your doctor to recommend and watch your levels.
This was no journey, battle etc. It was a trip, like a bad drug trip.
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U guys are great doing gardening that is true nature.
Lee whatever topic there is veer off sll u want--talk about what u wsnt to talk about. I'm always veering.
Pbrain Damn I wanted to call everyone turd muffins, now I'm not allowed LOL Also there is no time to get SE if they happen they happen when they want--but usually u see some sort of pattern as time goes on. And zi hope it easy enough for u. Pbrain I think Andrew Lessman has the real thing for vitamins, except I sure get tired of his blue shirt every single time. LOL
I hope everyone feels a little better today hand yesterday.
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Thank you everyone. I know I will get through this. Today, slowly, a little better mentally. But physically tired and crampy and just meh! From the chemo. Plus set bask with healing from TRAM which can take a year since he took the muscle. Again, mentally trying to push forward and see a future after this surgery and chemo. Jenn- you were so smart to go with the free TRAM. I will try not to hurt my plastic surgeon during my follow up this Tuesday. My abdominal skin is so freaking tight! Okay, I vented. So, a lot is playing into my feeling so down. I guess before chemo, I was focused on healing, and I guess, I wasn't doing to bad. Mentally I was fine. I was moving forward. But, after chemo, it set me back physically, so it's been hard. I think I've shared this before, but I don't know. But that my reconstruction story. I do have a friend I've found to talk to in California who has had the same surgery and is doing great! And she is 5 years out. She is an encouragement, so I speak to her when ever I can. And most of my friends are 3 hours away in Tampa. I'm in St Augustine where my parents can care for me. I do have a few church friends, but just met them recently. And I do have one friend that I can call on here that I've known for awhile. Again, I didn't want her to see me so down. But I am going to take your advice and reach out to her. Wow! You all are awesome. Thanks for reading my novel here. And thank you so much for being here for me. More than words can say. And yes, one day I want to be the one helping. That's who I am, a helper. I am just mourning right now the loss of my body that I knew, and the life I once had. And these chemicals are not helping me to move forward any. But I know they are killing this cancer. I mean this when I say it, this is like a family to me, and I am so grateful.
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Lee, I love showing off my yard. It really looks gorgeous in June, then after that it kind of goes beezerker and then I clean it all up for the next year. Cami is right, it is truly natural and it makes me feel good. Sore, dirty, dry-skinned, sun burned and sweaty, but good. Let's start that link!
Ms Tori, I feel the exact same way, this board has been such an amazing place to be. I feel like I can ask anything and there are always wise people who can comment back. Post anytime and all the time and don't ever worry about being a downer. If anyone can understand, it is us. I feel a lot safer here than in my regular environment. People have kind of surprised me in good and bad ways with this whole thing.
And Cami, we'd expect nothing less than turd muffin from you!
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Ms Tori I remember when I felt exactly like you. Eventually all this stuff ends and you start to feel like you again. I think that was what I was most scared of. When I started all this I was in great shape and feeling awesome. You will be there again. Granted a little different but not in discomfort like you are now.
Granted I'm saying this and I have the worst bloat/gas pains in my tummy from lunch. Ha ha, yes even that port surgery will take me about a week to get my digestive tract back to normal. Even 1/2 of local does a job on my digestive tract… but I'm done! you will be to in time.
BTW my port surgeon said no exercise for 2 weeks. Bullshit. I was power walking the next day and every day since (not swinging my right arm though). Today I actually did lower body strength training. Might hold of on upper body though.
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lago - My port surgeon said not to bend over and not to strain for a few days.
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Oops I was lifting boxes of tee shirts yesterday at the American Cancer Society. We were stuffing envelopes with tee shirts.
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Well if that was yesterday and you are fine then you are fine!
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Thank you for the support. Okay, let me just get mushy here for a second, because ya know my hormones are whacked now too, and water just pours from my eyes and cant get it to stop sometimes! I love you all! I mean it. I'm so glad to be able to come here and be understood. And to have the advice, and the care and concern. I am going to hit the sack early, and know tomorrow is a new day.
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lago - this:
"lago: I think that was what I was most scared of. When I started all this I was in great shape and feeling awesome."
This is what I've railed against the most - the whole "but I don't feel sick" thing. My husband had it just the opposite. He felt horrible and we had no idea why. He kept saying "I'm so worried you're going to get this flu" and then he moved on to "how is it you're able to avoid getting this flu as well? You must have a strong immune system" Well, what he had wasn't catching.
MsTori - I'm thinking I read that on top of everything else you started a period during chemo! It's been years since I've had a period (early menopause) but that on top of abdominal surgery AND chemo AND cancer - well, right now I'm sure it feels like the deck is stacked against you...
I understand what you described about mourning for your old body. Mine wasn't that great but I had finally shed the Menopause Years™ weight and was feeling pretty good.
I've ready so many posts from people who say they are feeling really great (post-"this") that it at least gives me hope that it's possible.
Editing to add - it took me a while to post this because we had a delivery in between but glad to see my memory served me right (for once) about those hormones...
Dx 10/9/2012, IDC, 3cm, Stage II, Grade 3, ER+/PR+, HER2+Surgery 11/07/2012 Mastectomy (Both)
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Sol, I would love to garden with you and Lee, and you would have fun with me, because on warm, sunny garden days, I break out the wine early!! I'm a fish eater and will do chicken if I have to, but I just don't like meat. Since I'm always trying to lose a few pounds, I've gotten a little more creative with protein and have found I can do lots of low fat dairy. I don't know if that is the best thing to do, but I'm learning more and more to stay away from soy. I actually have some fantastic tofu recipes that I've made over and over. I am really wondering if this is why I've felt no real symptoms from menopause. Or maybe it is just the wine
I actually have chemo brain. I can't follow any tv show or any book. How weird is that. I've only been like this when I used to get severe anxiety. I didn't miss being this spacey! And me, the queen of fiber, hasn't pooped since I took the first steroid pill on Thursday morning. I'm hurting! I took the Senacote tonight. Wish me luck! HAR!
I agree on the passage of time and it is really weird. I was thinking back today, the biggest hurdle for me was the MRI, being the raging claustrophobe that I am. Then it was the surgery since I've never had surgery and I was petrified. Now the chemo and I keep waiting for all of the side effects. Weird, weird stuff for us gals. I don't want no breast cancer posers in my life anymore. If you don't go through all this step by step, you can't begin to understand it. Smack down in Indiana coming up with my coworker who had the prophalactic double mastectomy. You'll read about it in the Indy Star
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Pbrain - the SE"s don't usually set in until a couple of days later once the steroids wear off. I remember my first treatment was on a Wednesday and on the Saturday, I wondered what hit me. If you get leg pain - a prescribed pain med and Claratin will help.
Hi Lago - good to hear you finally had your port out.
Omaz - how are you?
Just had my annual MRI - all clear. The bs only wants to see me once a year now. The 6 monthly thing was getting me down, so I'm really happy to get that news.
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PBrain, I'm laughing out loud at your last sentence combined with that particular emoticon. Granted, I'm not laughing REALLY loud because it's time to take the pain pill.
Yes, soltantio and PBrain - gardening in an alternative reality free of breast cancer would be quite nice...
During my second appointment with the BS I was trying to explain the analogy of my breast lump and Schrödinger's cat and he looked at me like I was insane. He finally turned it into "now you know why you need to have chemo."
Oh, okay... I guess I'll keep my big mouth shut from now on!
The in-laws had a beautiful arrangement sent today - it's filled with succulents, bamboo and little pebbles (and assorted what-not, like a little wicker-boob looking thing glued to the side). My husband said he helped them choose it over the phone and said the name included the word Zen. I guess zen is anything that helps us forget the stress of the immediate moment.
soltantio, you are so right about waiting for the passage of time. I took that enormous leap and decided to wait 8 weeks between the mammogram/ultrasound and the biopsy and I tried every trick in the book to keep myself thinking all was well. On the plane ride home from our vacation a woman in front of me let her seat fly back not once but twice - and I'm not talking about just easing it back but just letting it jolt back. The second time I was groping around in my purse looking for Tylenol vs. Excedrin (had to cut the Excedrin out for the biopsy which was scheduled for two days later). She let the damn seat go for the second time and the little tray hinge hit me right on the top of my head and I had the most intense PMS (poor me syndrome) episode of the entire waiting period. My husband had no idea because I had my head turned and the lights were kind of dim on the plane but the tears were just streaming down because I was so pi**ed off about finally having to face the music/reality/whatever and getting hit square on the head was just the trigger I "needed." I think that was the most pi**ed off I've been during this entire thing and it really was a silly reason to be mad.
After the biopsy (but pre-results) my mom had an episode that we tried to attend to long-distance and that almost sent me over yet another edge. Finally, the day when the radiologist said "I'm sorry but it is a tumor" I just sat there - no tears, no real reaction - not even shock. Just flat.
It's disconcerting to think about a life filled with waiting for the other shoe, or shoes, to come clattering down but then again, I've always been a worry-wart, waiting for the shoes to drop. It's just that now the shoes have names.
Oh well. It is what it is.
Fortunately, we have a nice waiting room here on this thread!
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SuzieQ: "Just had my annual MRI - all clear. The bs only wants to see me once a year now. The 6 monthly thing was getting me down, so I'm really happy to get that news."
THIS IS GREAT NEWS!! Congratulations!
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Thankyou Lee - because I had bilateral bc, I was being screened every 6 months.
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Hi suzieq! I am doing pretty good! I am also on the yearly mammo followup schedule but I still see the med onc every 3 months (on tamoxifen) and the rad onc and bs every year. We are moving into fall and I love this time of the year in Arizona, it's just beautiful.
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Sol, have you seen your liver and renal test results? If you have them, you can PM me. I'll give you the scoop.
I'm feeling nauseated. And I have a headache. But I pooped! (talk about TMI!)
And Lee, I am the most live and let live person ever, but those entitled people who think they can push their seats back on the cramped airplanes we have to fly in piss me off more than almost anything in the world. If they are going to stuff us in like sardines, they need to make it so the seats can't go back anymore. I've actually lost an entire glass of wine when someone threw their seat back and my Oprah magazine went flying. I was seriously peeved!
Tee hee.
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PBrain, so I'm finally starting to look at Twitter (via Tweetdeck) again and I see the following alert just a few moments ago:
Loud explosion rocks Indy's south side
This, on the heels of "Smack down in Indiana coming up with my coworker who had the prophalactic double mastectomy. You'll read about it in the Indy Star"
And my reaction was all
(just kidding! but you've gotta admit - the timing was pretty amazing)
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Also, soltantio/PBrain - I'm glad you can both relate to my poor me/pity party airplane moment. And soltantio - I've had the same thoughts regarding stress and making the tumor grow!
This afternoon I had a dream that I reached down and touched it - just like I've done so many times in the past - and it felt larger (good old-fashioned anxiety dream). In the same dream I was looking for the house I had back in Indiana and couldn't find it. I haven't had any dreams about that house for quite some time. I can't believe I'm sleeping soundly enough in a recliner to have deep dreams (thank you, pain pills, I couldn't do it without you).
Omaz - our ultimate plan is to retire (both of us - I no longer work but my husband still does) in Arizona. We spent 4 or 5 days in Scottsdale a couple of years ago (it was in November) checking out neighborhoods, went horseback riding at a place called Saguaro Lake, went to the botanical gardens, etc. We really loved it and even thought about driving back a few weekends ago - just to keep our minds off of everything pre-surgery. I also have fond memories of a little town called Oatman (Route 66) where the burros come right up to the car and stick their heads in the car windows!
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Lee, your plan sounds wonderful! Keep that going in your head because you do have a long life ahead of you still. I'm sure of it with your wonderful strength and attitude. After all of my years living in center city Philadelphia, I would love to retire to somewhere called Oatman!
And no, I had nothing to do with all that on the South side of Indy. I'm on the North side and I'm not a native Hoosier, so I get lost down there ;-) Where did you live in Indiana? As a born and bred Pennsylvanian, I have to say I really do love this state. But I might need to visit all you Californians for a vacation this winter. I need my photons! I was out there today in the sunshine, planting bulbs and (gasp) not wearing an ounce of sunscreen. I want all the natural vitamin D I can make.
So I'm still up and I'm in the part of the state that is on EDT. I'm really not liking these steroids. Think I can take benadryl with them? I slept like a baby last night after my benadryl push during chemo. I was in heaven! I slept from 10 p.m. until 12 p.m. Now I'm sitting here watching streaming Netflix like it is 5 in the afternoon. ARGHHHH! Suzieq, thanks for the advice. I guess I shouldn't be hating these steroids right now...I just want to sleep and poop like normal though...
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Oh, and Suzieq, sorry for being such a chemo-brained flake. Congrats on the fantastic news! That has to be such a relief for you. You go girl! You guys who have come out on the other side have no idea who inspiring you are to us newbies.
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Quoting PBrain: "You guys who have come out on the other side have no idea who inspiring you are to us newbies."
YES! Exactly!
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PBrain - once I found out what fixed it, I would start taking the meds on the Friday, so I didn't get such severe pain on the Saturday. I would also start taking stool softeners the day of chemo. I made the mistake of getting severly constipated once - it was literally like giving birth (TMI:))
I was so high on steroids for the 1st tx, my onc said I would crash big time and I did. I think I lay in bed crying for days.
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Suzieq, what was your chemo regimine? I'm on what I keep hearing is "relatively mild". I feel like my side effects are the steroids. I haven't looked at them as my friend because I can't sleep when I take them. I'm a perfect sleeper
I was able to sleep like a baby before every major exam in med school and before my surgery (which actually surprised me because I was seriously frightened by that whole experience, far more so than chemo). Now I'm sitting up watching tv at my 2 in the morning. And I can always move my happy bowels. ARGHH! Ha ha, I can't believe I'm posting this to you guys. I love this board!
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PBRAIN, what are you doing up at 2 in the morning? Oh, wait, I am too. Oops, never mind..... LOL. And I don't have steroids to blame. LOL don't worry, if you don't get SEs, we won't kick you out, well just be happy for you. And, BMs are important too! Of course, I had the opposite problem, but hey, still crappy stuff! LOL
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Jane - I had TCH x 6. Looks like you are having the same. Have you joined a chemo group on the Chemotherapy forum? Some of us from Nov 09 still write and catch up.
Yes, you are on a steroid high
up at 2am - I got a lot done during those days.0
