March 2011 chemo-lounge
Comments
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lilylady: I laughed out loud when I read you telling off your neighbor! Oh, that would feel good. So glad you are feeling better. I am the same way, when I am feeling down, I just stay away to avoide being a drag. But I am glad you popped in and hope you will do so even when you don't feel great...that's what we are here for.
Jules: good luck with the re-excision. I wil be praying for you, that all goes very smoothly.
Kay: my MO is pregnant and due in August (on my birthday!). It's really bad timing because I am supposed to be starting hormone therapy while she is on maternity leave. I am not particularly thrilled with her, so this may be my opportunity to find another MO.
pasmith: I totally agree about the stress. I went off on my kids last week (arguing again), and then I kept telling them how I was supposed to keep my stress down and they were making it worse. Fortunately, my dh stepped in before I really lit into them. Good thing I got my stress level through the roof telling them off about how stressed they made me...hmm.
Silia: sorry about the neuropathy. I didn't have too much of that, but I agree completely about the acupuncture. It really worked for me. I hope some of your issues resolve quickly and painlessly!
maria: Chicago is a great city. I hope this move is a good experience for you. I come from a long line of Detroit family (I have an uncle who won't let you park in his driveway if you don't have an American car), but I love Chicago.
My hair is growing some, too! Same, the hair that never fell out is getting slightly longer (I'm talking millimeters), but I would like the other hair to join in. I continue to lose eyebrows and lower eyelashes...don't know how long that will keep up.
I hope you all had a great weekend! We spent the 4th at the beach, and the weather was perfect.
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Maxine: My lashes started going about a week or two ago.....I hardly have any left on the bottom. The top has about 70% left...but they are thinner. I am bummed....NO, not the lashes!!!!! I have been using latisse the last few weeks...gosh I hope it kicks in soon! Brows are growing like weeds...I hardly have to connect the dots anymore!
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Kymn - We watched The Voice start to finish. (Surprised me because I never watch Idol or various talent shows. I think the fact that they were judging the voice vs. the package at the start really drew me in...) At the end I didn't know who to root for because I liked all 4 finalists. I think it's great that Javier won -- thought Dia would pull it out since she seemed popular on iTunes. Loved both Beverly and Vicci but thought both of them were trying too hard to "belt it out" in their final songs and thought they would have been better off to sound a little more melodic. Anyway fun show and think we'll hear future songs from a number of them. (Was surprised Nakia didn't make it to the final four...) Never did any voting or downloading of songs but still intend to get around to some downloads.
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Maxine O--I never thought it would be a bonus that my MO won't leave me in the lurch to have a baby. Of course, I don't know when he intends to up and retire. Hopefully he still has a few years in him. There are two drs with the same name in my cancer centre and they're dad and son. I got Dad. Apparently Son looks like Doogie Howser
My kids seem to be stepping up and that helps with my stress. They're darned well old enough! My near-18yo has decided to try the party life before he goes off to university. I suppose I should be glad that he waited this long but it gives me more grey hair (better than nothing?) when he goes out. He's being more mature in his dealings with us, so that helps.
I have a magnifying mirror and use to it get a good look at the little growers. I now have new stuff that is long enough to stand straight up--less than 1/2 an inch. The brows are still good, if a little patchy. And my lashes are now thin and light so they're invisible even if they're there. A little mascara and they reappear. My fingers are crosssed that they can hang in there for a couple more weeks.
Glad the 4th was a good day. Canada Day was perfect too. It sets the tone for the entire summer.0 -
I went and met with two plastic surgeons since I am not happy with mine. One of them uses TE's that have ports.....does anyone have a tissue expander that has a port (she described it just like a chemo port under the skin on your side a little lower than the arm pit area)? The current TE that I have does not have a port and the nurse uses a magnet to find the right area to stick the needle in for the fill right into my breast area. Experiences?
Thanks!
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My hair is coming back too! It used to be light colored, not blonde, but pretty light, but the new hair seems really dark. I am shocked. I am hoping it will change. Don't think it's going to look good with my pale skin. Less than a quarter inch though. But I now have absolutely no eyelashes or eyebrows. How could I be getting my hair back on my head and lose my eyelashes and eyebrows at the same time. I feel so weird looking without them. I think eyeliner and some drawn in lashes hide it if you're not really looking, but I feel naked!
Heard a song I wanted to play for everyone here today (Thanks everyone for letting me lean on you!):
Lean on Me by Bill Withers
Sometimes in our lives we all have pain
We all have sorrow
But if we are wise
We know that there's always tomorrowLean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean onPlease swallow your pride
If I have things you need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs
That you don't let showLean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean onIf there is a load you have to bear
That you can't carry
I'm right up the road
I'll share your load
If you just call meSo just call on me brother, when you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you'd understand
We all need somebody to lean onLean on me when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
Till I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean onLean on me...
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I am headed to Florida tomorrow for 5 days. Kind of a last minute decision. Have delayed my final chemo by 4 days. Going to Cocoa Beach- one of my BFFs has a house there. The last shuttle is being launched this week so I will be there for that.
Hate the way I look in everything-I caught a glimpse of myself in profile in a huge mirror-scared myself. I refuse to buy a new suit when I will have no breasts to put in it in a month. I am taking 2 old tired stetched out ones I use when I take my dad swimming, Other girls flying in from Indy and Louisville. I wish I had just said no. I am just too tired to make the effort. I just want my last tx and get thru this darned fatigue. Wah wah wah!!!
She lives 3 blocks from the beach. They have big old cruiser bikes to ride there and a big old umbrella for the beached bleached out whale cancer patient (me). The best part about it is they live near the pier so I will get frsh seafood every day.
I know i will have a great time once i get there...just can;t seem to muster the effort to get ready. I did buy a couple of books for the beach. Has anyone read "The Help"? I heard it was a great read. I bought the large print version so I didn;t have to use my reading glasses.
I am not taking my laptop so I will be out for a few days. I fly back Monday and go straight from the airport to chemo. I am going to go drum up a positive attitude and pack my carry-on. I hope eevrybody has a good week. Thanks for supporting my whining. Who whines about gpoing on vacation? What an ass.
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Thanks Colodisneylover, mdg, Silia, Kymn and all my survivor sisters for welcoming me...I now officially feel like a part of the group. I don't get a chance to pop in daily because of my demanding job and being at the computer so much while at work until when i get home I don't want to look at another computer some days. I know when i do pop in it is always a delight.
Kymn - I have a pocket full of quarters for the jukebox..lol...hopefully a cure is around the corner.
Colodisneylover - I have the same TE that you have. My PS used a magnet for the fills also it went right into the expander and it worked out great. I wouldn't want a TE port under my skin unless that was the only choice i had. I am scheduled to have the exchange surgery August 9th I am so looking forward to getting this hard expander out, but I am grateful that i have it now.
Jules - I too am glad your surgery is on schedule..the sooner the better.
I hope everyone had a great July 4th weekend. I did..i had a chance to visit a few museums on yesterday and later i watched a wonderful fire works display. Today i am a little tired but the weekend was nice.
I've noticed a tiny bit of hair growth on my head,..no body hair yet. My lashes are thin and i have about 5 hairs on each eye brow..lol.
Anyway, ladies have a good evening. I'll pop in again real soon.
Hugs to you all !!!!
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One more thing..Lilylady - I hope you have a fabulous time hanging out with your girls in Flordia and congratulations on your up coming last chemo treatment.
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Colo - I have no insights but will be interested to hear what others say.
Lean in me -- How perfect for our lounge!
Lily - as you're saying, you'll have a great time once you land. I totally relate to the no new bathing suit while in this in between pre-surg state... Hoping you come back thrilled with your decision to go. Bon voyage!0 -
lilylady: I read "The Help" with my book club....really enjoyed it and I think the movie comes out later this year....hope you like it too !!!
Appt. made for acupuncture on Saturday.. definitely getting the peripheral neuropathy in my feet from the Taxol
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Lily: You can whine...it's OK - even if it's about vacation. It takes a lot of energy (both physical and emotional) to get ready for that and deal with one's chemo appearance through it all. Have a fun time though...the sea air will be good for you. Being with friends will be good for you too! Safe travels and I am so glad to hear you say "final chemo"!!!! You are almost there. I hear you on the bathing suits...I have to go shopping for a new one today for our upcoming vacation. Now I have to find on that hides the ginormous scars even though I have the new foobs.....
DeeDee: Consider yourself lucky the body hair has not returned yet....mine has (grrr!). I so wish the leg, biking and especally under arm hair would stay away. I find it super hard to shave under arms because the implants have changed how that skin sits when I try to shave and I can't feel the skin much (kind of numb) in arm pits so I am always afraid I will cut myself. I have to shave my underarms in front of the mirror sometimes because I can see better....
Kay: I am doing the eyelash prayer..."oh please let them hang on a few more weeks...pretty please!!!" I could handle the eye brows as I did not lose them all, but I loved my long, dark lashes! Eventhough I did keep my hair, I lost some at the temples from the cold caps. I can see the hair growing in where I lost it. It almost looks like I had shaved part of it.....I keep trying to hide it as best I can...looks strange. I am glad to see hair growing though! Maybe you will like being a brunette!
Colodisney: I had the TE's with the ports found with a magnet. They were fine...all TE's are ugly. I would ask about those on the reconstruction board. If you have questions about anything with TE's and implants PM whippetmom. She is the local guru and can even tell you what type of implant your PS should use. She is very knowledgeable. I sent her my photos along with my measurements and she told me what she thought...my PS selected exactly what she recommended. I believe she is also a physician.
Pasmith: Glad the kids are stepping up......the partying thing would scar the crap out of me but then again my son is only 4! LOL! I don't think I will ever be ready for that day....I am dreading him going to kindergarten this fall and turning 5 in a few weeks.....he is already getting to big too fast!
A quick "heyyyyy" to everyone else I missed. Have a great day my dear friends!
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LilyLady - hope you have a great vacation, once you get there it will be fine. Just rest while you are there if you need to. I have read the Help, its good.
Jules hope you are OK with the surgery.
Hi DeeDee, - glad the hair is regrowing - I have no hair yet its a bit soon, but my eyebrows are still getting more sparse every day unfortunately.
Maria - here's hoping the eyelashes stay, you still have heaps of time with your son before he gets to the worrying age, 4 is a lovely age -over the terrible 2-3 bit and such fun. Mine are 25 and 30 and gone from home but both only 15 mins down the road
Don't worry too much with the partying Pasmith, they somehow seem to come through it all OK.
I have had 2 rad sessions - ok so far but then don't expect any side effects for the first week or two. I also start Arimidex on the 22nd July for 5 years. I have started to feel much fitter - been to my trainer a few times and not quite as out of breath as I was when I first went back.
I have to do a work presentation on 26th July to around 100 people. I can't decide whether to wear my headscarf, which I normally wear to work, or do the wig thing. Most of my customers don't know so I should probably use the wig, I just feel fake in it. What do you think?
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mdg/PennyCookson--It is a nerve wracking time with a kid who thinks he's an adult and knows what he's doing. He wasn't much better at 4yo either, but I had more control over his friends and activities. Now I'm merely a bystander with less and less influence.
He's going away to university so we have to let go and let him take responsibility. We have managed to distinguish ourselves as "chill" parents because we don't ban him from parties or insist that he not drink when everyone else is. We have encouraged him to talk and have shared our own experiences so that he is willing to talk.
This is it--the LAST CHEMO. I'm in the chair waiting for the herceptin to start.
I had a chat with the onco about next steps. Herceptin goes on (and on) obviously. He is not sure if he wants me on Tamoxifen or an AI drug. I'm just barely post-meno so ideally they like to do Tamox for a year or two and then switch to an AI drug. But Tamox has a risk of blood clots and I may have had an issue a few years back (never fully confirmed; no blood thinners used.) He wants to see if I'm definitely post-meno and then maybe go straight to the AI drugs, which can't be used if you're pre-meno, just to avoid the risk.
PennyCookson--my view on the wig is that very few people realize that it's fake. I even had a chemo nurse treat me like a newbie because she couldn't tell that I'd lost my hair and had a wig. I find the wig puts the cancer out of sight and I don't get treated differently or get into cancer conversations with people I don't know.0 -
Penny I personally would wear a beautiful scarff great eariings and fabulous makeup and rock it
. Also you never know who is out there that your courage gives strenght to someone else. JMO though ps still feeling like poo from this last chemo...arrgggg I am so impatient I just want it done and over with
Hugs Kymn
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pasmith - hurray - last one, everything gets better from here. I reckon you are taking exactly the right approach with your son. The most important thing is that they can talk to you if they get in any trouble. I was quite lenient and gave them freedom unless they really stepped over the line then I was quite harsh, its not worth stressing over the little things or you end up nagging them all the time and then they don't want to talk to you at all. My daughter rang me one evening at about midnight when she was 18, she said "mum I am really drunk will you come and get me" Frankly I was really pleased - you know they are going to get into situations, its about how they get out of them.
Kymn - hang in there, I felt the same with the last one - its meant to be over, so annoying- but it won't be long now. I am 3 weeks PFC and starting to actually feel WELL.
Thanks for the advice on the wig v scarf - haven't decided yet, maybe I will see how the mood takes me on the day.
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Surgery today.
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Good luck, Jules, prayers and hugs that you are comfortable and healing well when your surgery is complete. Let us know how things are going when you are able. P.S. My lumpectomy is tomorrow.
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Jules and Divine; Good luck! Hope all goes well!
kymn: glad you are done! I hope you are feeling less "poopy" today.
Pasmith: Congrats on being done!!! Good to hear.
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Jules and Dyvine good luck! Prayers for you!
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Thank you for well wishes and prayers, my surgery is scheduled for 7:30 am.
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Jules and Divine-Good luck to you both!
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Jules and thedivine, good luck in surgery, we're thinking of you
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Best wishes for those having surgery...hope your recovery is easy !!!
Taxol 7 of 12 today and got my initial radiation consult appt made...my ONC says it should be a "picnic" compared to chemo so we'll see !?! ...planning a trip to California to see our oldest daughter for her 25th birthday at the end of October...hope I'm still in one piece and can survive the trip...
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Jules and Divine - good luck with the surgery, hope you both recover quiickly.
Stlilts - I am on radiotherapy session 5 and no SE at all so far, but then the skin redness is not likely to kick in until a couple of weeks. Its a breeze at the moment.I have been told that if your skin gets too red women using emu oil have had really good results. I have ordered some jic.
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Paxsmith: Hurray for you! Congrats on being done! Must feel good. I can relate to the kids. I have a 22 y.o. and a 20 y.o. My DH says we won't know until they're 30 if we did a good job raising them or not. It is so much easier when they are little. Enjoy your little guy Maria! The time goes so fast. Chicago sounds exciting. I've never been there, but always wanted to see it. Jules and Mrs. M, Good luck on your surgeries. Hope all goes well and your recovery is swift and easy. Glad you're doing so well on the rads Penny. It is nice to know that treatments down the road will hopefully be easier. Hope you never have to use the emu oil.
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The re-excision of my lumpectomy was quick and easy compared to the first with lymph node dissection. Twilight anesthesia was much better for me than general, no nausea or vomiting. I'm a little sore, but have been using ice packs and Tylenol. I have stronger drugs available it I need them. Now waiting for the pathology report and praying that the surgeon was able to remove all of the cancer this time. Looks like he took a pretty big chunk out of my breast this time. oh well...
Thanks for all of your prayers and well wishes. Praying for you tonight, Devine. Hope all goes well. Let us know.
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Jules good to hear you are well, take care of yourself
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Jules so glad you are doing ok. Prayers for a good report!
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pasmith -- CONGRATS!!! I'm so happy for you.
Penny - when you mention your training, I think of you at 6 a.m. going into the little man's garage and grunting and leaving again. That was such a memorable post!
DivineMrsM - God bless on your surgery tomorrow. We will be happy to hear from you whenever you're up to checking in.
Jules - So glad this is behind you and I can't wait to hear that they got clear margins!
Maria - When's the last time we thanked you for starting this thread and bringing us all together?! THANKS A BUNCH for this lifeline.
My big news is that we just booked a week in Cape May for late August -- yippee! Figured I deserved a vaca post-chemo and pre-surgery.... Sending hugs to all.
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