Not quite a horder - decluttering
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Yes, getting a wardrobe together when you work involves a lot more than when you don't. It is easier when you don't work. Since I stopped working two years ago, my style has evolved into a more casual one. I still coordinate clothes somewhat and it makes it easy for traveling. Reds, blues, whites and blacks seem to be my current go-to colors with a couple purses. I mostly wear sneakers due to arthritic feet and joint pain from arimidex.
The other thing when working is sometimes the peer pressure. I worked at an elementary school as an aide. Some teachers dressed to the nines, with lots of added jewelry, purses, jackets, and shoes. It was something of a status symbol. I could see it was excess and occasionally in my head would calculated the money they spent on wardrobe items. Did they ever consider what they were actually spending? And the teachers with children in school spent additional on the kids' clothing, later selling pricey clothes for dirt cheap at garage sales.
Our society is out of whack in that way, where so much, too much consumerism goes on. I read the one book years ago, cant remember the name, but it talked about looking at purchases by how many hours you were working to afford them. If you make $20 and hour, and you buy a $40 pair of shoes, you work more than two hours for them since taxes are taken out of the pay, and so on for all kinds of purchases. It really makes you think a bit more about how you spend your money. The book might be called Your Money or Your Life.
And when I worked, I fell into the peer pressure, buying more clothes than I needed. Or when I had crappy days at work, retail therapy helped lift the bad mood. The work world does bring its challenges! Good luck to you, Wren!
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I worked in kindergarten, first as a para, then as a teacher. I learned pretty quickly that I wasn't paid enough to keep up with the Jonses in the wardrobe department. Too many times I'd go home to discover that I had marker all over my back, that some kid had wiped their nose on my skirt, splashed paint on my pants or that I had inadvertantly sat on some play-doh or Elmer's glue. Lucky for them, I am a strong believer In having art materials always available and the right of small children to make messes during their explorations. So I wore jeans and kept a change of clothes handy. Of course my cabinets were full of unorganized materials I was hoarding for some project or another, some of which never got used because I couldn't find them when I needed them.
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O, happy day! The house is thoroughly cleaned, including ovens, fridge, and basement, and the For Sale sign is in the yard. Now that we have three bedrooms and the playroom empty we should be able to keep things cleaned up. We're basically living out of our severely pared down bedroom, living room, and kitchen.
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Inspirational! Congratulations!
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That was a real job! Congratulations on your accomplishment!
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Mustlovepoodles- congrats on finally getting to where you need to be. May the house sell quickly and for a great price!
I had an interesting conversation with a friend last night who moved away and ended up purging a lot in the process, but then the job did not work and her house was still here and unsold so she came back. She talked about how how much she purged with the move, when she was in her new space, and even when she came back. She said as an outcome, she lost a bunch of weight too!
I have lost 27 pounds in the past year (23 just this year alone) and do think there is something to be said for the whole letting go process with stuff that changes things in our bodies too. Probably the physical process of decluttering that burns calories but think there is more here too. My weight loss is associated with a few things, but sort of think my decluttering has maybe helped me too? Now I need to go find more boxes to clean out!
I found a couple interesting articles on this and here is a recent one you might enjoy reading
https://www.today.com/home/study-shows-cleaning-yo...0 -
Well, I am having a hard time with my latest attempted purge of my closet. I have gotten rid of so much, but like 'loaves and fishes', it just seems to replicate itself! I am looking at my 'career clothes' from a job I left about 3 years ago. Nothing overly corporate, J.Crew, Ann Taylor etc. Really cute stuff, (classic/timeless) in really good condition (and all the accessories: shoes, scarves, purses. ugh! I have tried consignment shops, online and brick and mortar, but can't get much payout (if any) at all : ( My 'life style' has changed so many times in my life, I keep thinking that maybe opting will change and I will be glad I've got them... Meanwhile I am living in a rural area, L.L. Bean is the code word : ) I work as an artist and writer (starving!)...mostly at home...so clothes aren't usually a factor in my daily routine! I really hate to just give them all away...money is so tight ...
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Freshstarter, If it's possible you'll go back to working in an office and would need the clothes, perhaps you could pick out a couple of outfits for dress occasions (for a gallery opening, for example), and store the rest in plastic containers out of the closet. Then you'd have access to the clothes you're wearing right now in your closet. If/when you get a job where you need them, you'll be set. The YWCA has a program here for women returning to work. They get to pick out a week's worth of outfits to wear on the job. When they get a job, they can slowly buy clothes of their choice.
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Wren44- that's exactly what I'm doing! Putting those clothe in a large tote. I had to purchase so many tops since my lumpectomy. The surgery side boob is huge! Has been for 7 months now. Plus I've add LE to the mix and I do not like to top of my compression sleeve to show. I had so many cute sleeveless and cap type sleeve tops that I can't wear right now. It was fun shopping for new tops but now my closet is bursting at the seams! (It's a big closet walk in to...I LOVE TO SHOP!) I'm giving myself until next year. If I can't wear them next year they will be donated to a women's program or the rescue mission
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Poodles--What an accomplishment!Hooray for you! Good luck with the sale.
Jazzy--great article. She sounds a lot like me.
Freshstarter--I think Wren's idea is a good one. Sometimes stroring clothes out of site makes it easier to purge some of them later.
Vergadoll--giving yourself a time line is a great idea!
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Vargadoll, Have you seen the decorated sleeves? I saw a flyer at my mastectomy shop. They come in all kinds of designs and were invented by women who wear them.
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Poodles, I know that has to feel good to get the For Sale sign up. You have done a lot of work to reach that point. Good job! Hope a sale offer comes thru in a timely way.
Jazzy, yep, decluttering and weight loss seem to have a connection. I never even gave losing weight a thought while I spent months gathering together everything I planned to sell in my spring garage sale. Then a month after the sale, there I was beginning a walking routine which led to losing weight. Also, two years ago, my husband, who has looked after his mom since he was 18, lost 50 pounds over the course of a year after we got her house sold and moved her into an apartment across the street from us. The weight of worrying about her house and its upkeep was lifted from him.....tho I must add that the stress of moving her (89 years old and a bit much to deal with at times) led him to have a health crisis of sorts. It gave him a scare, and he chose to start an exercise routine and has stuck with it. Still, it is definitely tied to helping his mom downsize.
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Yes! I have one with a pattern. It's nude with black print. I get so many compliments on my tattoo! Then they realize it's a sleeve and ask where I got it they want one...my response is trust me you don't want one of these! I would love to get another one with some color to it.
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This will be the first week since I started with the dumpster that it isn't filled. Only a couple of bags in the big box. Planned to work on that yesterday, but it was so warm and beautiful that I just camped on the deck and listened to the breeze in the trees instead of working. I've got mixed feelings--disappointed in myself for not keeping up with the plan, happy to have taken advantage of what will likely be one of the last days of truly summer like weather this year, upset at falling behind schedule, angry that the garage door broke down and is making all this more difficult to deal with AND costing money to fix, and a little, tiny, tiny voice saying "It's ok, you accomplished a lot of decluttering in other ways, look how much better the living room and kitchen are looking, not filling the dumpster 1 week out of 8 is not a failure, that's 88% success" that is getting drowned out by the perfectionist yelling "FAILURE! GIVE UP! I SAID YOU COULDN'T DO IT!"
Somebody please take the perfectionist out and drop her down a deep, dark hole.
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Native Maine, definitely the smart move was to take advantage of some of the last of the beautiful summer weather you will have till next year. You are advised to not feel one iota of guilt about that!
Keep your thoughts on all you have accomplished, which is quite a lot. Quite a lot.
I can remember years ago making lists every day of what I needed to do and falling asleep berating myself for what didnt get done, Then I finally turned that around by only allowing myself to think of what DID get done, even if it was only one thing on the list. (Then I stopped making so many lists!)
Here is a story with a piece of wisdom that has really stayed with me: Many years ago, I read something in a Farmer's Almanac. The author was describing someone (it may have been the author) digging deep holes and planting posts for a fence that was to stretch quite a ways. Many, many holes requiring a lot of physical labor. The process could be daunting to face the entirety of the whole process. So, the adage was to keep his back to all the holes that still needed dug. He approached the job by looking in the direction of the holes that were done with the posts already in place. It is called "back to work." Seeing that which is complete.
That is what I say to you. Keep your back towards that which still needs decluttered. Look at what you have already done. You ARE making progress. I think you deserved the break you took yesterday.
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I would have enjoyed the possibly last good day too. That's called self-care. Think of it as a reward for all you've accomplished.
I had a critic that wouldn't let up. I finally got a visual picture of my head and the critic being outside berating me. I thought OMG she is not me. It really helped.
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NativeMaine- I keep notes on things I do along the way with decluttering, from trips to cosignment, donations, dumpters stuffing, giving away thing to people I know can use them when I cannot, etc. Create a simple log in a notebook and you will be amazed how much you have done. The memory is a tricky thing, I am usually doing way more than I ever think I am and when I go back to look, I have done a lot more than I realized! I am the perfectionist too.
Speaking of perfectionism, I had a friend in town who came to the house and have learned to not have everything perfect. However, I got some comments on things about some papers I had in my home office and how to get those scanned to get rid of them. Ha ha, here to see my house, not to judge things. Big eye roll! But the perfectionist in me now knows to let those things roll......
Taking my first round of falling clothing to consignment this weekend. As I replace things in my smaller size, I spent more on a few nice things and go for quality vs. quantity to avoid the over stuffed closet syndrome.
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Mrs. M--thanks for the words of wisdom. Looking back on what I have accomplished so far is a much better approach. And I have done a LOT! One day off is nothing in the grand scheme of things. I will remember the post digger and his back to work philosophy, and your trick of only thinking about what I have done. Thanks!
Wren-thanks for the reminder that taking care of myself is valid and important, too. I keep trying to evict Miss Perfectionism from my mind, but she's a sticky one. Going to keep working at it, though.
Jazzy--I am going to start a log just as soon as I am done on the bc boards this ayem. That is a great idea. Good for you for going with quality over quantity. Overstuffed closets are not useful!
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Thanks, NativeMainer! Your last sentence gave me a great idea for today's project. I think I will tackle the overstuffed closet I haven't opened in two years. What could possibly be in there that I can't get rid of? Should be easy, right?
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Sara--famous last words, but yup, should be easy!
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Hi friends- back in the closets again and had some fall items I had put to the side from the change out last spring. Starting to take some things to consignment again, at least to the one store I now have (the other closed). They took a good 30 items this weekend including some too big clothing now that I have lost weight, some shoes that don't work for my feet anymore, a few scarves, and wraps. Got more to go, and fun to take too big things in and come away with a few smaller things on credit.
Also doing another pass through donations. Purge baby purge!
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Good afternoon friends- I bought a book recently called 365 Days of Living Generously. There are daily readings around various principles, including philanthropy. Today's lesson was around giving time or money, which is easier for us? And where we resist to giving things away (time or money, which to me also includes stuff). The reading challenged me to do something to give away something today.
Therefore, I got busy about filling up more bags of things from the closet and some of the garage storage, including some decorations I don't need or want anymore. The back of my Subaru is filled up with donations to take to my favorite thrift shop this week.
I will give you the same challenge, what can you give away this week that would help someone?
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Challenge accepted!
now to get to work.
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I am loving these ideas. I have been slowly - very slowly trying to organize my home and life.
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Mistyeyes- we all sort of got going with this as any of us were ready. It takes a good year after treatment finishes just to get back from all that has been, Looks like you are almost to your year, but know it takes as long as it takes to feel better. I finished treatment in March 2013, but then had a heck of a time the first six months on the AI drugs, and finally got to some things starting the summer of 2014 and been at it off and on ever since. So take it slow sister, first things first!
Today I gave away a small fire pit that a neighbor gave me a few years back. She was selling some lovely garden pots, which I wanted, but threw the fire pit in for free and have never used it. A friend is redoing her patio in the mountains and wants to get a built in fire pit, but does not have the $$$ right now so I offered her mine since I really don't want it and passed it along today. I also will be invited to enjoy it up in the mountains when she is more settled!
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Being invited up is the best part. Good deeds sometimes have good rewards.
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DH found a new home for two large ladders today. We're having some work done at the house and he asked one of the workers if he wanted them. We're both happy to see them go to a good home--they were given to us by an elderly neighbor, so I consider this paying it forward. Still need to find a home for our small freezer--maybe we can send it home with the painter tomorrow.
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part of my problem getting rid of many clothes, (in good shape, cute, fit well...) is that I have been 'out of the loop' ...out of any loop for a year now. I face the crowded closet and my empty "week at a glance",and I don't know what lies a head, and what I will need for my next chapter, or even where to 'look'.
It's rather like 'who did it and ran?' I am 66 now, but as a struggling photographer an living in an exurban/rural area (about 75 miles outside of NYC) I am stymied about 'what's next'?
It's still to soon to even search for something part-time to help out with expenses, and not sure what duds I could use once I do figure something out....?
Looking in my closet I hear whispers of 'we are all your former lives, now go find a new one'
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Freshstart- I found the key to letting go of the excess (even when things fit well, look good) is to find a place you really want to take them that you feel good about. Here is something I have used when needing to lighten my load with anything, including when moving, downsizing, purging, etc.
Maybe start with a "things I love pile" and then put everything else in another pile. This will at least help you to know the things you still love and want to keep. Those go back in the closet and drawers right away. Then go to the "everything else pile" and chances are, a lot of that will end up needing to go somewhere like donations or consignment.
If you have any decent consignment stores in your area, take the better things that are 5 years old or less and try to get some money back for them. You can use it towards new things for the new chapter in your life. Not every community has these though. We had them here for years, but only been in the past few years that consignment has become really hot where I live. It is worth visiting places first to get a sense of what they will take and if your items fit into their store.
I lost a bunch of weight this year and so I have some nicer things that just are too big (yay), and been taking them in to get credit for new duds.
Good luck!
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