Single life after a mastectomy
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O I was wondering...you ladies mind if I post my boob pics in here? I really need thoughts on whether or not I should proceed to try to fix the left breast, or leave well enough alone. Ugh. So frustrating.
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Simplicity- I am sorry you are having a tough time. Just takes so darned long to feel better and you had a lot of complications after the recon. Made everything much longer. The advice about feeling better after a year is something I also heard from a doctor friend of mine. That turned out to be very true. And each year, I feel even better. But the concepts of "years" is hard to get your head around. Climbing back out from the whole thing has for sure been one of the hardest experiences in my life.
I like your therapist has you creating a bigger timeline. Cancer makes you feel like it is the only think you ever have known or are. I bet it will help you to see your life story in a different way. I never wanted cancer to define me.
Wishing you better days sister
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Well, I was in a funk prior to diagnosis. I think the funk lied in waiting. Thanks
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Simplicity glad to hear you are on the up...................
I am really going downhill emotionally, very tearful and hyper aware of the prosthetic.............not enoying anything
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It is a silicone breast form with a pathetic nipple thing on the end, it was the best and most lightweight one available and just feels like a huge weight plonked on to my chest, every movement i notice, I notice the difference on that side, I move that arm and it hits a lump there and although I doubt anyone will believe me I do still feel nipple sensations on that side and then I remember..........I though tphantom sensations would have stopped by now......i notice the lump on my chest sitting here typing etc etc.......plus summer is coming up when everyone wears as few clothes as posible and I see cleavages everywhere..........I just feel rubbish........and feel guilty for feeling like this.........
Signing off a clearly very ungrateful ex cáncer patient
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Simplicity - you could if you want. but personally i don't recommend you do another selective surgery. the anesthesia can do a lot of harm to your body. but if its something that is very important to you then you should look into it. i didn't have big boobs to begin with so i don't really have the symmetrical issue.
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Everyone having a hard week here. Sending you all much love
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morning ladies
Lily, you took the words right out of my mouth. I still have my rad burn scar which is clearly visible. Gaining weight distributes differently. All these bathing suit bla bla ad's. Yep. Lighter colors give away what my dark shirts hide. I have belly boobs. But my left loks smooshed (post pics later).
Thanks June & BB. It would be in office procedure so only local, but still.
Enerva, how are you today?
Jazzy?
Thank god its Friday. On call this weekend, so Im probably going to come home n crash this afternoon. Such a tiring week.
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ok Pics coming...
PS thinks if he cuts out an area of skin at that bottom 'lip' on the left breast, it will round it out some
I still have a spot where my 'bite' was lol See my little point on my right breast?O also, I have phantom nipple sensation too.
Just haven't decided yet and luckily they haven't called yet. Need to call my insurance today and talk to them but I really don't wanna....
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Simplicity - I think you are very brave in sharing these photos. I see what you mean about the left side. I cannot see how snipping something out will help, I think the main difference is its a bit flat in the centre. In your shoes I would put loads of coconut oil on that área to soften the skin and make it as flexible as posible and then go for fat transfer to round that flat bit out. Otherwise I think your symmetry is natural - no one is totally the same on both sides.
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hi friends I am happy that there was a good outcome regarding the USA. Helthcare thing today.
Simplicity I agree with BB and lili , once the scars fade and thing get settle it ll be more natural having your on tissue is great advantage over having an implant. Also the fat grafting will for sure help. I heard so many here in the reconstruction tread talk about their results after fat grafting. I didn't have the option.
For.me is the iron Brad feeling on the right side ghat bothers me the most.
I am supper tired but I went out after work to dinner with the student at work and another coworker whom I helped with a project 2 month ago.
We had a great time he brought his wife who is a wonderful lady and it was a great opportunity to relax but the bill was high .
I hate how I can't really afford those dinners
I hardly do that and tonight even though I enjoy the time out I regretted the $ I had to pay
Anyway also the girl was feeling sad and long story short she is glad her time with our company is coming to and end next month.
I am in bed I am so so glad I ll be able to rest tonight
I am sending you all big hugs
Night night
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bb there good man out there . I know one
Well my friend's partner so far he is such a such a huge support for her he goes with her to the appointments and he us there for her and does not seem to be afected by it he helps her a lot with her wounds . I must say I am very impressed by him .
Hope E. Is doing ok with all that happened simplicity you do deserve a good man by your side. We all do . I am glad I don't have one now but dame sometimes I wish lol
Going to try to study also need to do my taxes and that scares me
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There are good men out there. I have one, but damn relationshipping is hard. We continue to have issues with his kids. Especially his son who is stuck at E's house with his DUI stuff. Seeing a situation from two different views (Like North and South sometimes), it's hard bringing those together, or meeting in the middle and trying to work through it.
I remember a couple times I had others pack my wounds. It's a very weird bonding moment....very personal. E did it for me a couple times. I just couldn't do it sometimes
As far as my scars, E doesn't really even notice or mention unless I bring them up. He does ask about sensation, but it's very spotty from my lower tummy up. Same for my breasts. And I have phantom nipple sensation sometimes like they ached before my period, or when I was breast feeding-or needed to rather lol
We're in a rough patch right now as things with his sons issues come to a head from the courts. He 'decided' -dont know why he got a choice-on the ankle bracelet and intense therapy sessions 3 x a week, for 3 hrs a day. He has to pay for all this, and I think a bit of jail too. It's a mess, and the kid is a narcissist. Classic, textbook, narcissist. Been reading a lot lately and evidently I have been handling things the way I should-disengage.
So its been rough and that with everything else. But I think this therapy is going to help. Did I mention I initiated another EAP session? Anyway, 6 visits. I got enough to vent about for 6 sessions, and felt better just after the first. Oddest homework thou, is doing a timeline of my life.....ouch.....and Oh My....
Love to all
So tired
nite
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hi sorry I was not here for a few days .
Bb yes the yoga instructor and her hubby plus 6 kids is amazing. I am super tired but curious about tomorrow s appointment.
I have been thinking of what she will say and again I have no idea. Sometimes I feel ok and sometimes I feel there is something not so good yet I cant put my finger on it.
Ah simplicity girl I admire you for trying so hard and dealign with all that family situation. I am now so no wiling to go far for no one in the sense that I got stepped on many times and now I just want to grow old by myself.
I have a quiz tmw which will include chapters 4 ,5,6 and there is so so much on those dame chapters I am so nervous so many formulas and rules to remember and by the time I review problems from chap 6 I realize I forgot chapter 4 and so on ; (
Tonight i had the gardening class and have so much fun. I am now in love with color succulent plants and I am crazy about finding those lol
Also a hosta green one I saw in the Internet but I have no clue as per the name .
Tmw I ll got to work early so I can leave early and go to see the bs so we finally know I little more about this scars
I ll post tmw.
Have a great night ladies.
Love u all
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few plants I want
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Morning ladies.
Big day for you Enerva. Good luck on your quiz, and let us know what the bs says. I have slowed down on class. At this point in my life, I need to learn balance again. Still participating and sitting in on the class, just not stressing myself over the homework. Besides, this is a certificate I can get outside of class time, so not really worried about it. Add in the issues with my fellow IT team, and the exclusion of me..well, just hard to find motivation. I love how you are so involved with so much. Good for the soul. I like the top plant and thought the bottom one was those watermelon gummy thingies lol
*sigh* it is hard E. Super hard. idk. He has dealt with a lot from me too. Im kinda a pain in the arse....
The kids, well, I still really just think it is not me but the position I hold in their fathers life. Hard to remember at times. They have had a poopy hand dealt.
Ones pain, imo, is no reason to hurt another thou. Having a bit of a rough go at it lately.
I still have this linear thing...running the right side of my right breast. It now protrudes, visibly, without me raising my arm, and it seems to be growing up that side. It is visible like this and feels like this 0---0----0--0----0----0 Lump, cord, lump cord cord. Hurts. All Dr's say is it is scar tissue. ugh.
Hope all have a good day
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E- waiting to hear the results from your visit with the BS today on your MRI.
Simplicity- I agree with BB, you have come far although you probably don't feel so because you are not back to where you were. As a couple of your witnesses to what you have been through the past 18 months or longer since you joined this thread, I say you have come a long way. You are figuring it out as you go along what you need, what needs to be parked for awhile longer, etc. Keep going girlfriend.
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ok all good we can relax. Lol
Bad news is that she gave a crap report like no details on the tissue. She bervaly told me is lots but did not put it on paper. She said I'd ps cam take ur out they ll review the images themselves figures.
But here u go
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E- sounds like scar tissue issues, no evidence of malignancy. I hope you feel relieved?
BB- those mammos are no fun. As you know I get them 2X Ha year. This summer may be the last before I go back to annual. I am at the doctor all the time too!
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E - you might want to follow up with ultrasound image to see the architecture of your lower right breast location. for the US standard, that's what they would do. that's what happened to me.
but it doesn't seem something serious. but you might want to have a follow up to have a peace of mind.
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Oh June thanks a lot
I will cuz I do feel sick like that scar giving me more than rad se hard to explain
At the same time I am glad there was no a sign per say in the upper quadrant?
I had lots of calcification there and that is where my sister got a second tumor after her bmx
But I ll as my family doctor about the us
Thanks for the info june
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E- you are taking super good care of yourself with this.
Those calcifications can be worrisome. I had some in my first mammo years ago and had a surgical biopsy and no cancer. But when I had the MRI on the right side after the IDC dx on the left some 13 years later, it was in the same area where the DCIS was later found. I am convinced those calcifications way back when were a sign things were changing.
Since my treatment, I had all kinds of calcifications have shown up the first few years after and believed to be from the surgeries and rads. The radiologists watched them closely for awhile, but now they seem to be better (no new ones). I still get pains in my breasts where nerves are regenerating too. The post changes can make you really worry.
With your family history, asking a lot of questions is a good thing. I hope you get more info as you go along.
Good luck on the test too!
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A sister from BCO shared this tonight. So appropriate for all of us working to find our way through. Next time someone tells me to get over it, I will e-mail them this.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/breast-cancer-...
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Hi friend
Enerva.bosum blue.jazzy girl .juneping i can see some new names how are you all doing .spring is on the way in ontario.I am busy with studies n full time job with 3 teeagers.
For the last 2 months i am having severe pain in my legs thanks to texotere .i couldnt complete my 6 cycles of chemo in 2013 had to stop chemi after 4 cycles bcoz i had started neuropathy .my oncologist suggested me to start Cymbalta or Effexor .dr use antidep for the pain relief i m worry about the side effects of medicine but the pain is killing me .Is anybody here taking any anti dep or having neuropathy how do u deal with it.i am worry about myself that one day i wont be able to do my cooking n other stuff.
Please advice
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hey milky so sorry about the side effects. As u see we are all dealing with some and I am sure there must be a tread here for that specific issue? I only had legs problems during the last 3 chemo to a point my feet where useless and it was very scarry. After I stop chemo slowly it came back room normal and I am glad still ok
I will search and if I find anything I ll send your way.
Glad you are ok and busy
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milkyway - sorry to hear you are dealing with pain. i don't have much to say but i read that exercise can relief some pain but i am not sure if you are able to exercise. my friend did but not going through any tx...just being depressed. he had to wane it off carefully....don't ever go cold turkey if you decide to take antidepressant.
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Milky- good to hear from you and sorry to hear about the problems with the neuropathy. Sounds like from the chemo but also double check your blood sugar as it can be as sign of diabetes. I have learned some women end up diabetic after treatment, seems to go with the systemic drugs like chemo and the AIs. Just good to rule out?
You may need to see a pain specialist or neurologist for help too.
I hope you are still working on your degree, or maybe finished by now?
Wishing everyone else a good weekend!
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hi friends. Hope all had a great weekend
I had a good one. I think this coming weekend spring ll finaly be here. Today it felt wonderful
I was able to mount some pots on my balcony walls and I ll take my table and plants a out side next weekend.
Here u see the pots
I ll send pictures when I have all plants out .
I am so looking forward this summer ; )
Here are my plants so far
Oh and this morning there was a bit of sun so my lime trees got some vd3 lol
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E- nice job with the plants.
I have been working on my outdoor gardens and finishing some pruning that needed to get done. We are still getting some rounds of cooler weather and moisture so no big planting going on yet. Got a few more weeks before we get past frost potential.
Hope everyone else is doing okay this week?
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BB- thanks for your kind words. My gardens are holding their own right now as we are getting blasts of cold and rain today (snow in some parts) and winter is back and not letting go. Rumors of a hard frost tonight so I will be ready with some blankets. We have a few more weeks before we get past frost potential. We are thankful for the moisture though.
Got a business dinner tonight, and my cute outfit I picked out will be too chilly for this evening. Back to the closet we go.....
I left my gym finally and joined the city pool again this past weekend, where I used to swim laps for years. Got a senior membership now for 55 plus years and they have more swimming hours. I love swimming and this is the best place in town for lap swimming. Went this past Sunday for the first time and it was so wonderful. I am heading over shortly for my next work out. I am trying to get back to swimming 3X a week again and think I will with being in a good space to do it.
How is your back feeling?
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