Single life after a mastectomy

jazzygirl

BB- is your pool therapy M-W-Fri? I just got back from the noon time lap session and it was so nice today. Middle of the day and tons of lanes. I did 40 laps although I may have been pushing it with my creaky shoulder. I was thinking that with the new routines I am working to create to work more from home, I need to make the noon hour a time for me to get over there to swim 2X a week. You are right that it is not a quick in and out, but if I can even commit to 30 laps, with the driving and in and out, I can get there and home in an hour and 15 minutes. Going to try to make this a priority.

Maybe avoid the times around your pool therapy for other apts?

The water does us good!

Simplicity

Morning ladies,

Enerva, love the plants and planters. How are you feeling today?

BB, I wish I could find time and a place to do water therapy. Kids and i went to the mountains a couple weeks ago and the pool felt so good and can't explain really, but stretching my limbs felt really good in the pool too! Hope you are doing ok.

Milky, June, Jazzy, y'all doing ok?

Lots of discomfort on my radiated side lately, but I am also doing a lot physically trying to gain my strength back and get some projects done around my house.

Hope all enjoy the day.

jazzygirl

Simplicity- check around your area for a water class, even if it is a once week water zumba, aerobics, or related. Water is really good for anyone with joint issues, or other health problems. A great way to exercise and feel supported. It soothes my body and my soul. I am going again today for lap swimming.

I am doing okay, working to close with my collaboration partners on our next project together. Taking longer than expected but we have a big call/meeting coming up in a few weeks. I am enjoying my time off and getting things done, catching up with friends, and doing things I never have time for because when I am working, I have little time for much else.

Enerva

hi just wanted to stop by aND say hi.

Well I am so so sad my country Venezuela is in such chaos and it Hurst to know most of my relatives are there.

See in instagram how the people are in the streets asking the president to exit power.

The repression is brutal but hopefully they won't give up and stay focus .

https://www.instagram.com/p/BSjX6Pjh7L8/

jazzygirl

E- I hope they can get this president out of VZ. Meanwhile, our government is launching missiles in to Syria today. I feel so bad for everyone.

Lily55

I wish i could feel like some of you do, today I found out that I still have another 2 years and 4 months mínimum to wait for reconstruction, I am just in floods of tears, its 5 years already and to be honest this feels like a punishment now..................................

Simplicity

Oh Lily! I can imagine thats a mind f**k of mass proportion! Hugs! Understandable that you feel that way.

jazzygirl

Lilly- I don't understand this at all. I know sometimes you have to wait but seven plus years? Is there any sort of advocacy program where you live for cancer patients?

Hugs friend, this is just such difficult news.

Lily55

I am taking up and have already followed numerous advocacy routes, my next one is a complaint at regional government level, that is going in just after Easter, but they don´t care, they put in writing how important reconstruction is and that it is a right but in practice make it almost impossible to achieve unless it is expanders and prosthetic implants that are not suitable for me according to the Doctors and they just do not CARE or understand how important it is, its the financial crisis you know and recon is seen as a luxury......I have researched, got help, worked, researched etc and had so much conflicting info given to me but now I know which hospital list I am on BUT if I want to move to a faster list I have to start again............and no one is really willing to tell me if there are any faster lists and where they are............................

jazzygirl

Lilly- you are making me so aware that socialized medicine is not the panacea that many dream of here in the US. Although I disagree with the concept of healthcare for profit, I do realize that we in the US do have access to more rapid care (as long as you have insurance, which is our gov is trying to take away from some of us). From what I hear, your type of recon may be less common and thus, has a longer wait list. That seems so wrong, especially if you were told the other was not an option.

Are you still seeing your counselor? I wonder if he/she may have any advice for you as someone who works within the system?

I am so sorry Lilly. So unfair. Hugs sister

Lily55

its only a DIEP, hardly a rare surgery! But it needs a plastic surgeon and they are not valued or common in the public health system, but even for other types there is a long wait, only implants get done fast

Simplicity

Morning ladies. What a week. And tonight may get interesting. I dont and do at the same time, understand why Im tolerating so much trying to maintain this relationship.....

Lily, from here, the view is DIEP & TRAM are a bit rare but are gaining popularity. Here it requires a micro surgeon. Theres only one DIEP PS in the city here. I have diep on right & tram on left (partial muscle used). My left is, well youve seen it lol

It sucks. Really does. And wish I had a wand to wave for you. Im having awful body image, esteem issues right now.

Hope everyone enjoys their day. Naptime for me

Enerva

I just lost a long post

I wanted to say I am sorry lili u deserve your surgery.

I wish u were a candidate for implants .

The reason I am unhappy is the radiation se

On the right implant

But overall I am happy with my breast. Only one is having issues.

I git my first tree yesterday. Also got a nice big pot and transfered to it.

Bb u must Google golden shadow lol

Hoping it won't dye

Here is a picture now. Balcony ll be half done tomw.

No sure u can see the leaves coming lol

Enerva

Oh bb I am so sorry. Hope ur mom will get well soon ; (

Golden shadow lol my fingers are useless and my phone auto correct but to Spanish words lol

Golden shadow is the name of the tree I bought.

If u Google it u can see what it looks like when its leaves come out.

Yes my country is in such pain 7 days in the street and been hit by our government.

jazzygirl

E- what kind of tree? I see the buds. Yay for spring!

I stopped at my favorite nursery today to get a few plants for the pots and saw this incredible blooming cactus. I wanted to get it for a spot in the front, but the guy there said it won't winter well as it is low desert (and we are high desert here). Only good to about 25 degrees F and we get colder than that sometimes. So I just took a photo of it. One of the loveliest cactus blooms I have ever seen

Simplicity

We've taken a few time outs. The negativity of his kids drains me. He understands I have to step away at times.

Enerva, I missed it, what kind of tree is that

jazzygirl

BB- missed your post about your mom being in the hospital. The UTI can go septic pretty fast in an older person (it did for our mom) so I am glad they got her in and getting her the care she needs. I don't think we had that many problems with Medicare with our mom, but my sister managed my mother's healthcare, I handled the money. So not totally sure, but think all insurance is a nightmare. Sorry things are not good friend, but am glad to hear your sister is there to help. This stuff is really hard to do on your own. Keep us posted on how she is doing and please take care of yourself too.

Simplicity- I think you have figured out ways to create "healthy space" as I call it in the new normal with E and his family. Although I am not in a relationship, I do it with my sister, or friends that demand too much from me, clients too. I just don't like being around people or situations that make life harder than it is. I think relationships as we age are just that much harder because of exs, kids, and a whole lot of other history that comes as we age.

E- I also saw the pics on your native county above. I hope VZ is on the cusp of finding their way back from all this turmoil. The world is in such chaos right now. Enjoy your plants, good for the soul.

Lilly- sending you big hugs. I know everything feels really hard right now. We care.

juneping

oh ladies...love those plants photos....spring is almost here. when i was walking down the streets, i saw the trees budding already...still very cold here though.

Lily - I am sorry about the wait...(((hugs)))....

I saw the movie "passengers"...it's very good. j-law started to grow on me....i really like her in this movie. very natural and charming.

Enerva

hi here is the info on my tree

Pagoda Dogwood, Cornus alternafolia, is a native understory plant that can be grown as a shrub or a small tree. Golden Shadows
is a highly shade tolerant forest understory tree/shrub with beautifully tiered horizontal branching (in whorls). The flowers are attractive but not very showy---it's the chartreuse variegation of the foliage and the winter architecture that are its outstanding ornamental features.

This species' strongest ornamental feature is its layered horizontal branching pattern, which accounts for the common name "pagoda dogwood". Another common name is "alternate-leaf dogwood", as it's the only member of the genus with alternate leaf arrangement

Also a picture of one from Internet

I love it and I ll care for it .fingers crossed it does well.

Also got a strsberry plant and a blue berries lol

I ll work on my balcony tmw

Pictures ll be posted

Enerva

you guys are no going to believe what happened this morning I went to check all at the balcony and my tree soil was all over the floor .the god dame squirrels

I live in a 6th floor why do they manage to go up ?

What will I do now ?

I am so piss cuz I have no idea they could come destroy my plants in a 6 floor balcony

jazzygirl

E- you could put netting or chicken wire over the top of the pots so they won't dig. I am surprised too, but think animals in urban environments have figured out ways to survive.

Speaking of which, my story from this morning in my hood is while out potting some plants I got yesterday, I heard some flapping and chirping a couple feet away and looked up to expecting to see birds mating, but what looked like a falcon had come out of nowhere to nail a small bird very close to where I was working. I have seen hawks and falcons in this area taking out some of the birds, but this really stunned me as the bird did it literally a few feet from where I was planting these pots. I looked up and the bird looked at me, perhaps not realizing I was there and we both gave each other the eye, and then it flew off with it's prey. Just wow!

Anyways, here are some of the pots I did this morning

Enerva

wow jazz that us amazing u saw that happening

I went to home deepo and pickup some wood lol I ll make some planters myself

Ll show u went I get home

Ll be a bit of work but ll look so cool

jazzygirl

E- you should join the gardening thread. Anyone else here too that loves gardening. Getting busier there again.

https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/7/topics/...

jazzygirl

BB- I am sorry your mom is not doing well. I have been in this place with both parents and know it is not an easy place to be. I hope you and your sister can work together to create a plan for your mom to be taken care of. Hugs sister.

Enerva

Oh bb I am so so sorry. I wish there was something I could do to change what happens to our parents

I care for my mom till she die and I know how hard it is to see her in this situation. Sending u love bb.

Ok bb so I was at home deepo and I was told about the spray for the squirrels. But went I read the bottle on my hand I felt horrible about it it will spray pepe mint to the squirrels and I can't do it (

But I also stop at sheriden gardens which is one of my favorite places to dream lol and I asked them also. I told an old man there that I was told to use a spray but that I am not able to do such thing. He laugh and he told me he had something effective. He sold me a bag of a fertilizer for my tree which smell bad and he promise me that squirrels hate it.lol so I got that one .

You ll be proud of me I went to home deepo and I decided to build my own planters with cheap pine wood lol I have been looking a beautiful things people build with scrap wood . Then I saw the prices for the wood planter I want and let's face it I can't afford those so I found wood which was 4 feet 1/16 " long and 9 1/2 wide . There were $4.43 each so I grabbed 6 asked the guys to cut at 3 feet all for me. Then came home and put my own drill to the job lol turned out great . I also had a can of light green so decided to paint one side green to make it match a little with the other I put up last week. So tired now but I am glad I did it. I also managed to open 3 big holes on the sides to put my fingers and be able to grab them to move them . Now I lll buy cheap plastic ones to go inside fIll with soil and plant my hostas lol

Also separated my strawberries plants I have 8 and those ll go on the walls along with some begonias. I have a few pot color ones to plant my lime tree and this week depending on weather my table and all my information plants ll move outside.

Here are some pictures of my wood projet today. also de fertilizer to repel squirrels

Oh and when I got back from home deepo the little shit had been here and done it again I took a picture look at the mess

Enerva

here are my strawberries plants

jazzygirl

BB- what your mom wants is what every parent wants. To remain in their home and have their children move in and take care of them. Some are able to take care of a parent, others can't for any number of reasons. I think you realize you cannot be her caregiver.

If you have access to a social worker at the hospital, talk to them about what they suggest after your mom is done with rehab. Your mom may be able to stay at home longer with some additional in home care. Or they may recommend something else depending on what they are seeing with her physical and mental condition. We were told our mother could never live alone again, so we began the plans after she went to rehab and then moved to another one after another incident. It took us a good year to figure out what to do and to make it happen. You may have to try a few different things before you settle on something (we did).

E- good job on the flower boxes. Will you paint them or keep them plain? Next comes the plants, I can see a whole variety of petunias and other things. Flowers make us happy!

That squirrel is a little chit.

June- it was good to hear from you to and glad you are seeing signs of spring. Hopefully the east coast is getting past the last of the winter storms.

Lilly- thinking of you and hoping you are able to have a better week. The news you heard on the delayed recon was really tough to absorb this week.

Simplicity- hoping your week is not too stressful with work and other things too

jazzygirl

BB- I understand that. The only people that suggest these things are people that would never do that themselves. I had a cousin's husband suggest I move back east to take care of my mother. I hardly knew him, but got away from him quickly after that. I could not help but notice years later when his parents became ill in Florida, he did not move there to take care of them.

I hope you find the right solution for your mother's care. This stuff is very difficult, so leverage any resources you can around this friend.

Enerva

hi friends. Bb I send you a huge hug. I support you. I know you are not in a place to care for your mom. When I took my mom to live with me it was very very hard due to her mind was slowly going and I honestly think this is just the hardest. Sending you strength and hugs.

Yes my little projects keeps me from going mental. I cry today just from watching an emotional video of the protest in Venezuela.

I just feel so sad to see the elderly crying and going to bed with no food or hope.

I feel sick just sick of the world and everything everywhere is just not a great world

Like how I wish I could move to a jungle where there could be no news no one just a place far away where no tragedy could find us?

Night night

Squirrel did a smaller mess today I hope she got the message. I was brave and took almost all plants out now and table too.

Ll take pictures tmw

Simplicity

Morning ladies.

I get it BB. I could never enter my moms world either. I have mentioned to her that she is welcome to come to my place lol

My hands hurt so bad today :(These little projects at home to keep my mind ....busy...clear...whatever, lol, feel good but I am using muscles that I haven't used in a while and wow. Not sure if this is hormone blocker related or what. But even before the projects, there were days my hands just hurt so bad. Almost in tears pain I mean, what do you do when your hands hurt? We use them for like, EVERYTHING. Ugh.

Enerva, I love hearing of all your little projects. You are an inspiration, truly.

My bathroom is almost done. Gotta touch up in some areas. Working on my natural area in the backyard on pretty days.

Hope everyone enjoy the day