A place to talk death and dying issues
Comments
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Just a note to remind folks Palliative care in Cnada, england , and australia is DIFFERENT in most ways. In the USA the word Hospice is defined by law. Palliative care is before the hospital. This is a new subspecialty. To understand the difference please read allof my posts above with the links Thanks sheila
Diane sorry about your mom
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Thanks for that info Diane.....
It's all so very confusing & there really isn't anyone to talk to about it!!
I have a friend who has a very poor prognosis so we get to say things to each other that we wouldn't say to anyone else......:)
I'm now thinking about staying at home (no hospice!!).
My hubby has said he wants me to do what I'm most comfortable with but I still have the 'how will he cope afterwards if I die in our bed' going through my head!!
Apparently, the palliative care people come any time, day or night, if they are needed.
Anyone with any thoughts or experience with this situation?
(((Hugs)))
Karen xx0 -
Karen, hospice has 2 programs usually. One is you go to their place, the other is they come to your home and help your loved ones care for you. That is what my step dad did and that is what I am planning. So hospice is the right direction for you and they will call and handle getting your body picked up, etc. They're very helpful.
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To all, we all have discussed chemo/ anethesia brain. We now can call it anesthesia/chemo/drug brain. This article is in AARP magazine. It discusses the drug classifications that can cause memory loss. It describes why each drug class can cause memory loss. It gives specific names of drugs. It gives alternative drugs that can be substituted. I would suggest reviewing it with your prescribing doc if you have concerns regarding any of your meds. I also suggest you put it in your favorite places on your computer. Also, printing it off for future referrence if you have a printer. Please, pass this on to other BCO friends, friends etc.
sassywww.aarp.org/health/brain-heal...
Haven't been here much in alongggggg time, but this artcle is a MUST SHARE type with those I care about
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bump
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Chickadee, thanks for bumping the topic, your bump reminded me that I had wanted to mention something.
I believe this may have been the thread where it was discussed that a piece of jewelry can be made from a person's cremated ashes. While that was interesting for some, another person said that if they'd lost or misplaced the piece of jewelry, it would bother them for obvious reasons.
Last week, a woman I work with had a pretty sterling silver necklace with a small medalion. When I mentioned how pretty it was, she told me the medalion had her grandmother's fingerprint on it. I so loved the idea. I believe funeral homes provide this service, but it is also something that can be purchased at any time in your life if you wanted to give a keepsake to someone. I just thought I'd mention it; I am pretty sure I am going to get one for my son.
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Thanks for that idea Divine! Jo
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i live in connecticut and would love more info
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I googled "Fingerprint jewelry" and there are many links to places that do this. Here are a few links to try, and you can also do a google search for more:
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Bump
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Sas-sachatzi, sorry I just noticed your response to my post in May.
Yes, here the the municipality handles everthing free of charge, from transportation to location, prayer ceremony to transportation & burial once you buy your final house in your selected graveyard. They even transport to other cities throughout Turkiye. Cool, eh? Not yo mention we do have graveyards for all religions which I guess would be tempting for some, considering the amounts you pay to services you don't even get to see!
Hugs,
Ebru0 -
Bon, thanks. Btw generalised anxiety, really? That's sad for a med practioner!
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What goes around DOES come around! And sometimes the ones involved don't notice it, but you do! Balance of the universe.
26 years, oops the toll might be BIG on this ignorance indeed!
Waiting for your news.
Hugs,
Ebru0 -
Bump0
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bump0 -
I am starting to get a little scared. I feel like my life force is leaving me, if that makes any sense. Increasing pain and fatigue. Circling my wagons to include only my nearest and dearest. I am due to have a CT scan soon. I cannot even stand the pressure of my panties - guess it's time for me to start going commando0 -
((OBXK))0 -
{{{{OBXK}}}}0 -
OBXK-----Soooo sorry for all this bullcaca. What is your doc doing for pain control.?0 -
OBXK? What does this mean?0 -
Bon, have you gotten any news on the SSDI?
Karen, so sorry to hear how you are feeling. Hoping this is a temporary setback. When do you get scan results?0 -
Bon, it really sucks that they are making you go through this. Just what you need, more stress in your life. Hope all goes well ... As it should!0 -
macyhen, obxk is Karens forum name and they are sending her a hug, as am I. Karen I feel so sad for you, and hope you are managing a little better. Love Gail0 -
OBXK, I hope you start feeling better soon. You are in my thoughts always.
Teri0 -
I haven't been posting here lately but have been keeping each of you in my heart and thoughts. Am so sorry to hear you are feeling so poorly, Karen, hoping you may find moments of beauty and peace today.
Bon, good luck with the appeal - SO frustrating and so unnecessary to add more stress to your life right now.
I am slowly continuing to declutter my house for 2 reasons: I will enjoy it more NOW and it will be easier for DH and family later on. I am having the entire family here for Thanksgiving (WHAT WAS I THINKING???) and have been putting together a "last-chance" box of things family can take if they want, otherwise it gets donated NOW.
Hugs to all, and extra hugs to those who need them.0 -
For those of us who are interested in end of life care and the medical profession, the following free teleconference might be worthwhile:
http://www.mindful.org/news/free-teleconference-with-katy-butler
"Sponsored by the Metta Institute, the teleconference promises 'an honest examination of the medical profession’s handling of end-of-life care,' inspired by Butler’s deeply personal new memoir about her own parents’ passage, Knocking on Heaven’s Door: The Path to a Better Way of Death."0 -
Thanks for the love everyone. I had my scan Friday. My liver mets have progressed more than 20% and for the first time, I have some fluid in my abdomen. I had been in a drug trial - I am anxious to see if I will feel a bit better now that I will no longer be taking it.
Enjoying the good moments...
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Here's another link that might be of interest, "1 in 4 Medicare Patients with Advanced Cancer Dies in Hospital; Care Intensity at End Increases"
http://tdi.dartmouth.edu/press/updates/1-in-4-Medicare-Patients
Here's a quote from the study:
“Our research continues to find that patients with advanced cancer are often receiving aggressive care until their final days, when we know that most patients would prefer care directed toward a better quality of life through hospice and palliative services. The increase in patients admitted to hospice care only days before death suggests that hospice services are often provided too late to provide much benefit.” said David C. Goodman, M.D., M.S., co-principal investigator for the Dartmouth Atlas Project. “Fuller discussions with patients who have advanced cancer on their prognosis and options for care can lead to a better quality of life than many receive today.”0 -
Bon, keeping you in my heart and prayers. This is such a tough time for you.
I am in the process of divesting myself of "stuff." In a moment of non-thinking, I invited the entire family to my house for Thanksgiving dinner this year. So I am going to put out a box that is marked "Last chance" and put family heirlooms in there if any of the sibs or their kids want the stuff, otherwise it is going to be donated. I am also going to provide rolls of masking tape and a marker and allow them to roam around the house and mark anything they might like to have ... there is a standing joke in our family about labeling things before someone dies - my grandmother had masking tape labels on EVERYTHING so there was no question about who was to get her things. So we just carry it a little further, kind of as a dark humor joke, and let people put their own labels on. Of course, there is no guarantee they will actually GET that item - depends on executor and MY labels! Everyone is really looking forward to a big family dinner together, and I have run this by my sisters who think it will be great fun.
Brenda, I continue to be appalled at how much care is given for cancer at the end. My own PCP (whom I have fired and replaced with a more reasonable PCP) got her own father treated aggressively for cancer for 6 months, making him so sick and he still died, but he died sick for 6 months rather than 2 or 3 months. Not worth it in my book. I carry my DNR and power of medical proxy and power of attorney with me at all times. I need to get a wallet card to let folks know that I have those papers in my handbag and which compartment they are in as that is one of the first places an EMT will look in case of an emergency.
I am in a state of anxiety today, had PET scan, waiting for tomorrow for results. Trying not to think too much about it, but my brain keeps wandering in and out of that "continue treatment or not" pathway. Trying to reign in the thoughts and focus on the positives today, like a visit from one of my sisters.0 -
Linda dear one, have know idea what words will flow in the writing, First I love you. You are one of the kindest souls I have ever had the joy of knowing . I'll finish here b/c I have to go find something and bring it back love sassy
HantaYo Omaha, NE Joined: Apr 2010 Posts: 280 Jul 26, 2010 06:52am HantaYo wrote:
Namaste!
Sas,
I learned the greeting Namste! when I went to Nepal and did a trek in the Himalya's. I saw Mt Everest, but didn't climb it. We treked from 4,000 ft to 14000 ft. It was epic and magical. The Sherpa's always greeted each other and us with folding their hands in front of their chest (as in praying) and slightly bowing their head while saying Namaste!. It is a form of greeting and means "I salute the God in you". It may possibly be a Buddhist term instead of a Sherpa word. The Sherpa's primarily were quite solid in Buddhism. It helps me to focus on the value of the other individual I am communicationg with and not taking them for granted, especially when one is not face to face.
Karla
this leads to something else Linda stay with me I'll make it come together. Sweetie I spent so much time trying to find what I wanted to send you. Please, if I forget ------do not let me forget---it's important I'm just weary and must rest. Found part of it , but not the whole.
Many others here have heard this story, but I will tell it again because when I first heard It, I so grabbed the belief in me that is central to all of us. There is this beautiful nurse on the nurses thread that on a Himalayan Trek observed that when the Sherpas met each other, they folded their hands as if in prayer and said Namaste. The translation they gave her was "I Salute the God Within You". The power in that statement, I believe goes to the core of what Jesus taught. It, also, goes to the core of many other religions. In the case of the Sherpas, Karla thought it was Buddist in origin.
From her story, I have drawn that EACH of us carry GOD within us. It is how, we carry God within that matters. (still searching for the rest of what I wrote
)Namaste-I Salute the God Within You---L&H and Faith Sheila
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