Radiation recovery
Comments
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Thanks, Lemon. I think I am spaced out, or maybe tuned out. This BC thing is such an intellectual, emotional, and physical behemoth! It feels like I've gotten a PhD in the treatment labyrinth, making decisions, and moving through all the testing, surgery, radiation, and now hormonal therapy. It feels strange to put all that intensity aside and return to the real world. I know it's a positive step, but, boy, what a transition!
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Opps! Seems I replied twice to Lemon. Did not see my first reply, so thought, as happens so very often, that it had vanished into cyberspace.
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Hi April and Janis,
I am thinking of you both, and hope all goes well today. April it will be 10/10 and i say Mazel Tov! Time to go out a and celebrate. For the pocket party I am bringing wine.
Janis I hope you get clearance on all 3 of your issues. It is time you have a break from medical issues. For your pocket party i am also bringing wine. God only know you wouldn't want to try my baking or cooking because it is so bad. Just not my thing.
xoxo,
Kate
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Brookside...no problem, that feeling is so prevalent when you finish rads and for months after that it deserves being said twice
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Joan, a BCO meet up...how totally totally fun. What a lovely day you'll have. Do let us know how it goes
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So, MostlySew, you've felt it too?
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Brookside, some of us were here when this thread was started, we we just coming off rads. It has been quite awhile. This thread was started just for that purpose....to help us all maneuver through the next phase of BC. There is so much going on when we are first diagnosed. We are poked and prodded and tested and tested some more and cut on and then the long journey through rads. We suddenly go from chaos to calm. It is a strange feeling after months of active treatment. Sometimes there is the feeling that if we are no longer in active treatment, then we are suddenly vulnerable to cancer returning. No true of course, and this is what the AI's and Tamifoxen are for. So, this is the place to come as you start this new journey. Having a feeling of letdown is perfectly normal. After rads may present new challenges, and that is what this is about, helping each other through that transition. Some of us have been here since the start, so we love helping to guide the newbies. Never be afraid to be honest here, we all understand!
Thanks everyone for hopping in my pocket today. I am leaving in half an hour for the hospital. I am glad to have so much company!
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Thanks, Janis. I just went back and read Merilee's very first post (and yours), and I see this thread is meant for more than physiological side effects. Wonderful! I'm even more happy to be here, and very happy you, and a few others, stuck around to help us newbies. Yes, I am in the inbetween--finished rads, just now starting, with trepidation, arimidex, and with no scary followups scheduled for months. So I can relax. But that means turning it all off and stepping back into my "old" world. I think it is a bereavement of sorts. In the past, I've been a hospital chaplain and studied, and worked with, changes and processes inpatients are faced with. I've also worked with people suffering illness, or other losses. Chances are, if I were to apply my pastoral education and experience to myself, I'd get through this a lot faster!
I wish you very, very excellent test results!
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Joan, Hello busy lady. I was thinking about you yesterday, slogging through my volunteer job--reviewing and commenting on senior honors english papers. It took me most of the day, and I was reminded of how challenging the classroom is, in and out. Weekend is almost here, so remember to take a little time for yourself! Enjoy your meet-up.
April, Yay for you! Done!
Janis, since it's early out here I will bring brunch items, starting with mimosas.
Kate, have fun today!
Brookside, Lots of us feel that way...like the treatments were keeping us safe, and now we are being cut adrift. But we are all out here (shall I carry on with the metaphor? in the same boat?), so we tied our rafts together and, YES, we formed an island.
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Yes, Yes, and island.....just perfect. And mimosa's. And an oven for Janis!
Brookside, my old pals (old as in graduates like I) Sab and Janis and Joan have stated it quite well. It's a funny time. Things crop up in your mind and you "know" to not worry about it....but you do none the less. And, also from your pastoral training, you'll know you can't hurry this along. It's almost like grieving: for all you lost, your lost innocence being one, for all the others going thru it, for the helplessness and for the feeling of being alone. Family and friends try to help. they do. However, if you haven't been thru it, and sometimes even if you have, you just "don't get it". And people frequently end up feeling sort of lost and alone. So, that is especially what this thread is for. Us old timers really are "recovered" we just like helping out and setting an example. and, as you can see, there are still scary times for all of us sometimes....Janis has her mammo and Ultrasound today for example. And we can all help out with that one by understanding. Oh......and we love pocket parties too, so stick with us, you too can become an old hand at this.
Sew (and Sab, I beg you, don't report my English grade on this essay, in fact, best if you read it with one eye closed and the other one not paying attenting lol)
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Ummm, Sew, in another of my past lives I was an English teacher. I learned very quickly that it's content that counts; grammar is for English teachers. Your content gets an A+.
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Ah, thanks, Brookside. You certainly have the gift of making people feel good...and seeing the intent behind the verbiage!
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Well, I will be starting rads on Monday. I'm very anxious to get this started and done with. It seemed like things went so fast in the beginning, and now everything has slowed down to a crawl. We waited for a MO appt...then we waited for my oncotype score...and then we waited to set up the sim for radiation. I want to get started so that I can get finished!
I've been reading the posts, learning a great deal. Please send good thoughts my way as I start on this latest installment of the breast cancer adventure. I so appreciate the support on these boards!
Best,
Lynn
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Hi Lynn,
We all know just what you mean about hurrying up to wait. I had the same thing and it drove me nuts...well, nuttier maybe! You'll do fine, it will be scary at first but you'll figure out what you need to do to get thru. during the treatments some use music, some count clicks, just just day dream. It goes very fast, especially compared to your set up appt, so that's the great part. I do recommend taking a book, ipod, knitting or a big smile to your appts as I think all of us have had delays of some amount of time, so you might want to expect that. And, you'll quickly come to learn our mantra here.....moisturize, eat tons of protein, moisturize, get as much sleep as you can (there's something about the beginning of rads which precludes sleep), moisturize, use neutral soap in the bath (like dove), eat protein, and take mental health time. And, check in here for more wisdom or just to make sure you're not nuts, or just to see if anyone's made it this far...we have, and you will too. Good luck.
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I just got good news. The American cancer Society is going to help me with transportation for chemo. This week a man named Steven will pick me up and coming home they gave me a free taxi voucher. So I will have different people taking me every week. So, that is similar to your experience runfree. I am so happy about this.
I am thinking about you Janis and April, and can't wait to say congtats. I am leaving now to go to my hairdresser, and then I am going out with my friend doctor at 2:30
and coming back sometime in the evening. I am excited because we are going to Malibu, and I love the Bu. If I don't get a chance to post for you tonight then I will post Saturday.
Hugs
Kate
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LibraryLynn - Welcome and congrats as you begin rads Monday!
Use your down time to focus on you...have the best weekend you can family&friends&fun...with lots of laughter:). Find your happy quite place in your mind...full moon shining on the ocean with cool healing light and breeze flowing over your body...whatever works for you...but find a way to focus on your breathing and calm happy mind.
It is serious laser tag, but humor is good. Be kind to yourself it's okay to be overwhelmed. Ask questions about your protocol ask about your skin -just ask- your rad team wants you do feel comfortable and for this to be a good experience.
Sending calm confident thoughts your way...you will rock rads brave warrior!
(((Hugs)))
Cindy
Join us on the 2013 Spring Rad thread!0 -
Lynn welcome to this wonderful place. You will feel the love. How nice you have been reading and learning so much. We are so happy to help you throughout this next phase. Some of us feel like veterans and hopefully we can offer you helpful tips, and always loving support. We like to laugh a lot too. So much of BC is about waiting, we are all used to that. Once rads starts you will be very busy for several weeks. Don't let it overwhelm you. These ladies have been there, done that and there is indeed life on the other side. I am really sorry you had to get cancer to find us, but I think you will find so much comfort here. Much luck to you in the days ahead. Sending cyber hugs to you hon.
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Ladies, would you like to know my favorite new words? SCAR TISSUE! Oh my gosh what a relief. When she did the mammogram she took the films to the radiologist to have him read them right away. She came back in the room and said he wanted a couple more pictures. After those were sent to him, he came in to talk with me. Good old lumpy bumpy scar tissue! He did say he wants to have me have a mammogram in 6 months instead of year. Just to be on the safe side. I did not get the results of the DEXA scan, I will find out Tuesday more than likely. So everyone can breathe a collective sigh of relief. Not every lumpy has to be a scary one. I could do cartwheels right now. If I could do cartwheels, LOL.
Thank you all for hanging with me throughout all of this. Having my friends here pulling and praying for me is such a wonderful feeling. You ladies are the best!
Oh, and my primary called while I was gone of course. She wants me to come in to go over my blood work, and to get the ball rolling on my stomach issues. The h-pylori test was negative, so time for a scope.
Thanks again my friends. Love and hugs to all.
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Janis....we're coming to LOVE those lumpy, bumpy breasts......hurrah for them! And who'd have thought we were ever going to cheer for those? I'm glad they're doing the 6 month check on you. Means they're not worried (or it would be 3 months, I've been there once) and means they're following it..... Perfect! So, rest easy, my friend, that's one BIG hurdle you've gotten over. Now, for all those stomach issues, but at least the Dr. called.....
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Janis, I feel your relief...and I am so very happy for you!
Kate, That's great news about the rides.
Lynn, Welcome. I hope rads are a non-event for you. Sew (aka mother-hen) gives good advice, and so does Cindy.
Brookside, An English teacher? Special respect for you today, as my poor brain recovers from the measly 8 papers I had to review. Do you know the IB program? The kids write about 4-6 pages in-class on their choice of brain bursting questions. I am so impressed with their ability to think, organize and write so well under pressure.
Got another interview next week, so I dashed out for a long-needed haircut. It looks just like Shirley Temple, but with wrinkles.
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Not easy to get your hair wrinkled, Sab...do you need a referral to Kate's flat iron person? Good luck on the interview...those are as scary as BC (almost anyway)
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Give me a D - Give me an O - Give me an N - Give me an E! and that my friends spells DONE! Finis! Hasta la vista radiation!!! Gee, that was quick, wasn't it? LOL...they gave me 5 gazillion centigrays in 10 tx's and then sent me on my way after banging the gong and giving me hugs and a certificate of completion. They said I was the model patient. Little did they know I had visions of taking a sledge hammer to that machine...scary bugger!
Anyway, JANIS!!!! So very happy about your scar tissue. Now we need to find out why your tummy is giving you issues.
Welcome LibraryLynn! This is a fabulous bunch here on this thread.
Sew, you are the best mother hen ever. Your advice is truly always appreciated and welcome. It sure helped me a lot. I appreciated all of the advice given on this thread.
Sab, best of luck on the interview! That is my area of expertise. I work with the unemployed population to try and help them become re-employed. Remember, an interview is just a conversation. If you are nervous, picture them in their underwear..LOL
Kate, so happy to hear about your rides and the taxis. It will make this so much easier on you not to have to worry about transportation. We are in that pocket. Hope you have fun at happy hour today.
Cindy, you are truly the best cheerleader ever to grace a thread on BCO. Always so welcoming and positive. You are a blessing. xo
Brookside, my dream job would be an English Teacher.
Joan, hoping you have a blast at the BCO meetup. Princess Kantalope said she was going so looking forward to hearing all about it..lol
My boss and a co-worker came over with a basket filled with gifts and an envelope stuffed with cash that they collected so that I can "do something fun with it." I was so blown away. Made me cry and I am not usually overtly emotional in front of people. This was so unexpected. Have to figure out what I want to do with it. Maybe a spa day. Hmmm, any ideas ladies? It is 250.00 if anyone can think of what I should do with it, let me know.
OK, I am really whipped so going to lay around tonight watching the tube.
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Janis I'm so happy for you that it was just scar tissue!!Thanks for your kind words of encouragement on your earlier response to my post about the Rads.It was so sweet and well spoke it almost brought tears to my eyes.I can't tell you how happy I am I found this thread.Everyone is always there to give encouragement and advice and you got to love the pocket parties!!
Welcome Lynn, I'm sorry you are on your own BC journey but you found the right place and you will learn a lot.Don't be scared it is pretty simple it's just the unknown that scared me at first.Try and keep your mind busy while lying still on the Rads table.Towards the end I would lay their and count how long each boost would last for the different positions.And of course drink drink drink.Lots of protein too.Just follow your body and try to not push yourself too hard.I found early in Rads it was difficult to sleep I'm not sure why but everyone has different side effects.0 -
MostlySew, you nailed this: "It's almost like grieving: for all you lost, your lost innocence being one, for all the others going thru it, for the helplessness and for the feeling of being alone." That brought a lump to my throat, especially the lost innocence part. I am trying to think forward--one more week and I'm done with rads!--but my innocence in being able to think ahead about the next few months is one of the things that has been harmed in all this. We college teachers have sharply seasonal lives; I work frantically during the term and then go into a whole different mode between terms. It's hard not to do my usual fantasizing about all I want to accomplish this summer, including getting back to my running which is a healing thing to plan for as well as to do. I'll be starting Tamoxifen pretty soon and possibly also ovarian suppression, and I don't know what I'll feel like. Maybe fine, maybe not fine, joint aches making it hard to run. But I know this is small potatoes, really, compared to more serious cancers and other challenges. It's just part of what's changed on the mental side of things for me. End of minor boo hoo.
Lynn, my sorry-but-welcome to you too! Radiation experiences seem to vary a lot. I'm fortunate to be having a pretty easy time of it so far. Maybe you will too, and first of all it will be good to get started.
Janis, hooray for scar tissue! Just another weirdness cancer provides, we get to be happy about that.
Kate, yippee for your rides! It really is a big help, the variety as much as the driving itself. It takes my mind off the number of times I'm going and instead it's just "who will I get to talk to today?" I hope it's like that for you too. Hope you have a gorgeous weekend in Malibu!
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Way to go, April. I'm so glad you're done. Not as glad as you are, I know. Now you deserve a wonderful weekend, doing exactly what you want to do, and nothing else.
Hurray for the scar tissue, Janis. Exactly what we all hoped for. Ditto on the great weekend for you! Have you scheduled your scope?
Welcome, Lynn. Please do not let my whining discourage you. I worried and worried about rads, but, in the end, skin issues were pretty much a nonissue, as I guess they are for most of us.
Sab, it was many years ago that I taught English. Loved the kids, but soon moved on to other things. For many years, I taught skiing on weekends. Truly loved that--when you tell other people's children to do something, they do it. If you tell them not to, they don't. Seemed like heaven to me!
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April, BIG WOO HOO TO YOU!!!! That's fantastic. I love the gift basket. I vote for spa! Some kind of fancy facial, massage, mud bath....Sounds dreamy. Or some of that, but save a bit for a nice top for spring. Forward!
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SAB- I am going to go on Amazon and order it tonight! Thank you I think it may be just what I needed. Gemini shared on our ILC Thread the Sarcastic Boob blog so I am also going to go and check that out too- thanks Gemini
Having a hard time keeping up here also, so active!
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Janis YAHOO for scar tissue!!!!!! I know you are breathing easier, next step stomach issue but I am cheering the mammo was GOOD!!!
April- Congratulations on your whirlwind rads! What specail co workers that is so nice, let us know what you decide to buy yourself.
Kate- Have fun in Malibu, glad your going out. Also good news on getting rides to your tx too.
Lynn- Welcome, stick around because these woman on this thread are so loving and helpful I cant express what it has meant to me. Just knowing they are here makes it a bit easier to do it all and know your not alone.
Cindy- One more to go? Big day on Monday?
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April congrats !!! I'm doing the happy dance with you.I'm also a wee bit jealous I never got to ring a gong or got a certificate of completion.And wow a basket of gifts and money!!! I think that is so cool!!!
I'M very fatigued this evening it's been a long evening.I went to shop n save and got a few things I knew there was a bag that had yogurt in it and such I brought it in and didn't even remember doing it.How sad is that?I was on way outside to get it when my daughter said "mom...here it is right here"
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April - We will take scar tissue any day. Heck ya!!!
RunFree and Mostly Sew - You took the words right out of my mouth. It is grief. Getting through it. We all are.
Lynn - Welcome to one of the best groups there is for this crappy thing that is happening.
Kate - That is wonderful news about getting rides. I am in your pocket most days.
Guess what I am eating ladies????????????? OATMEAL COOKIE WITH RAISINS. Yup. I did not have one depressing thought today. Well ok one but it was short lived.
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