Radiation recovery
Comments
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I just remembered how to describe the skirt I bought today that you can wear long or wear long and tie up the sides to be shorter. I think you would describe it as a harem skirt
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Hi Lemon,
I'm so sorry you're going thru this rough patch, but it's entirely understandable. It's "normal" in fact...silly as that may seem. BC actually causes PTSD in us according to my PCP. And that's a tough one to deal with and we all do it in our own way. We were "talking" a month or more ago that after finishing our active treatment we all need to deal with the grieving we must go thru....our loss of innocence, facing our own limitations, the fact we're really not invincible and the unfairness of it all. I think you're just coming to terms with all this and probably trying to find a new "normal" for you. Which may well be different from before. I would suggest you attempt to get up and out daily if you can. Take a short walk. Plant a few new plants. Call a friend. Get your nails done (I can recommend green polish, lol). Just something for you. And vent here, we all understand and care....0 -
Hi sweet Lemon.
So glad that you have your mom, and enjoy an annual shopping event for mother's day. Sorry that your weather will be crummy, and that you have to postpone it.
Regarding the age thing, I learn so much from my younger friends. I've only told family and a few friends about my bladder cancer, so most people don't know. Also, even with the people that I do know, when I go out with them, I NEVER ever talk about my health, that includes my children too. When I have a problem I email them and tell them about it once. For instance my children etc know I have a swollen leg, but when it gets awful like yesterday I don't tell them about it. I do vent here. My father was a hypochondriac, and thank God he was barely ever ill. He died at 90. He had knee replacement at 70 and heart failure when he died, but from maybe age 55 on he claimed he had every illness in the book. it drove me nuts, and had me swear that when I got old I wouldn't talk about my health, and other than here or at my doctor's I barely do talk about my health, even though it is so bad now. When I go out with my younger doctor friend to malibu etc my health is NEVER discussed. When I am out with her I am energized and never even think about my health. If I have a problem I email her once, but if the same thing gets worse like my leg being worse I don't tell her about it. Most folks think that I am very positive and resilient, and I love being that way.
Getting breast cancer, as you did, at such a young age is terrible. Funny that you always knew you would deal with health issues, and unfortunately you were right. I always thought I had my dad's health and wouldn't have any health issues till I was 90. Getting bc shocked me. Nobody in my family ever had cancer. Getting bladder cancer shocked me more.
So glad your husband bought you flowers, and I hope your son has something wonderful planned for you.
I am sad that you are feeling tired and lousy. I pray that you will feel better soon.
Hugs,
Kate
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Whole other topic: Radiation after reconstruction
Has anyone here had rads after a completed reconstruction? If so, how did your breast look after? Did the two breasts match enough? How about the skin on the radiated side?
My PS said it can be tricky. She said the gummie bear implant won't be affected but the skin will and sometimes the radiated breast becomes smaller than the no radiated one.
Any feedback would be very much appreciated. I haven't started rads and am anxious about doing rads for this reason and for other reasons (long term possible SEs).
Also, is there any specific typeof rads that better protects the skin? For example, i've heard that in some areas they have equipment to do rads in the prone position. Does that make a difference?
Like many here I have had a hard time with chemo, somewhat less with BMX and recon and just want to be through with it all without paying more of a price to come from this d--d BC.
Thanks for any input!
Peggy0 -
Cindy and mostly sew, so well said re PTSD, I found your words helpful too. Better days ahead lemon.
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Hi Lemon,
I got thinking about you this morning and hope you're having a better day today. Maybe lunch with your mom since it's raining? I did think that if this continues much longer, you should talk with your PCP or MO about having your thyroid checked. It's a simple blood test. Low thyroid can make you feel just the way you describe, sort of like anemia, and rads seems to mess with thyroid levels. I expect the thought of another problem or Dr. appt is abhorrent to you right now, but it might well be worth it. Hugs
Peggy, sorry, I don't know anything about rads after recon, but hopefully someone here can lend a suggestion or two.
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Happy Mother's Day everyone. We have a gorgeous day in Santa Monica 78 and sunny. I am dressed, already, in my new harem skirt and blouse that I bought yesterday. My hairdresser will be here at 10:30 to flat iron my hair. After that I will go to Kelly's luncheon. I am feeling good today
xoxo,
Kate
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Lemon, i felt exactly the same one month out (and all the way through rads as well). This week, week seven post rads, I finally had a "normal" workday on Wednesday. Thursday I got weepy (arimidex working its magic, I think) and went home at noon. Friday I went home early. I think this BC stuff is harder on our bodies and our emotions than we realize. Anxiety, depression, and PTSD are all normal reactions. And isn't Tamoxofen known for mood swings, otherwise know as funks? Have you complained to your RO or MO about your inertia? Probably they want to know how you're feeling..
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Lemon - Just wanted to let you know that what you are feeling is normal after rads. The word funk describes it. I am 5mos out and STILL dealing with the fatigue and some pain and skin issues. The time line seems to be a few mos. I have some other stuff going on so that adds to mine but give it time. I was really starting to get all depressed when someone here I think it was Sew..mentioned that a year out they were really feeling better. So a year is my goal now.
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So sorry don't know about rads after recon.
Just popping in to wish all the Mommas out there a special day.
My contribution to the girlie movement:
Sorry for the giant feet picture! Forgot to resize 
. Hugs!0 -
SAB, pretty!
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Love your pedi Sab, and love you contributing to the girlie-girl movement.
I am at the donut shop waiting for Kelly's luncheon to start. I will see if Kelly can take my photo. I am wearing my new harem skirt,and a new blouse and I am also sporting blue toes and nails.
xoxo,
Kate
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Happy Mothers day to all of you whether your a mom to those with 2 legs or 4!
Susannah, Cindy, Kate and Brookside- Thank you so much for letting me know this is normal. The boys have been great today and that has been nice. Reading your posts brought me a tear, I am not myself. I didnt take the tamoxifen today, I dont want to give up but I just feel so not me in everyway.
Sew- thank you, strange that you would mention the thyroid, I was just online looking up symptoms! My skin is dry, fatigue, hair seems fine but my nails are suddenly peeling.. I have a endocronologist because I have a goiter and 2 nodules. Used to have them checked for changes once a year, its been about 5 years now. I will call and get an appointment tomorrow to get in there. Thanks for the gentle nudge.
Brookside, I have not called my MO. I felt lousy before I started taking the tamox, its just making it worse. Thank you for caring.
Bunkie- 1 year? Havent we all been though enough? I hate to hear 5 months out and your still having the residual effect of this happening. I am so scared to get to that 6 month MRI not until Oct and I am already worried. I feel almost guilty that I should be acting fine, I was lucky. xo
Your all great BC Caring Moms too.. And I dont say that because of age, I know the kindess you share here is just an example of the great moms you all are.
xo
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Kims nails. 
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Kate - I love Harem skirts. I used to go down to Venice Beach and get some hippie skirts. You know the kind. I am so glad you had a great day. Could use that weather right now. It is cold and we have frost warnings tonight. Just what you like. That is what I miss the most about The Promenade. There is a store for everything down there.
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Lemon, I've had maybe one professional manicure in my life, but even I can tell those are beautiful nails! I love all the colors and glitter people are posting too. I'm sorry you are feeling so down. I'm worried about that when I start Tamoxifen too. So far it hasn't hit me post-rads but I'm bracing myself. It's kind of a hard balance between tackling everything as a problem that can be solved and yet still expecting things to be hard for a while, so you can be gentle with yourself if they are. I certainly don't have any answers. My only plan for myself is to stay focused on the future in every way I can, between running and working on my house and moving ahead in my work. But as I've said before, I don't know if I'll be up to any of that, and that scares me, as it takes away both the benefit of the activities themselves and even moreso the psychological boost of the forward orientation. It's a mind-game for sure. Anyway, energy permitting, I think it's always wise to look into any physical aspects to this that are treatable, like thyroid, low-grade clinical depression/anxiety, or treatable side effects of Tamox. I hope you can find some way to lessen or solve this soon, whatever that way may be.
Of all the silly things--I have a cold! I counted up that I've been to 5 hospitals and 4 other medical offices in the past four months for a total of probably 50 visits, and my immune system fended off germs like a champ. I'm also exposed to germs from 3 different schools. But NOW, when I'm so eager to try to restart my life, and our semester is ending, I have that icky sore throat, sneezing, aching, drooping feeling. Bummer. It's not anything newsworthy compared to what so many of you are going through, but I always forget how much a simple cold can lay me flat.
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Ok, Lemon, so who's Kim? She's got to be a comparative youngster! Beautiful hands and nails.
Sab...I'm loving green toes.
Run Free, bummer about the summer vacation cold. Perhaps it's really your body who heard about all the plans, and is reminding you to first take 4 or 5 days to just veg out on the couch with that mindless novel you're embarrassed to admit you're reading? Just a thought. Get better soon.
Lemon, good idea to see the endocrinologist I think. Let us know.
My Mother's Day story: I took my very vibrant but a bit slower 94 yr old Mom out to brunch, and it wasn't until the end of the meal 2 hours later that she noticed my green nails. I think everyone else in the place already had. It's not like I have ever had green nails before either. My last polish job was a staid nude and that was 2 years ago! She wanted to know if I'd painted them just to match my jacket and was I redoing them tomorrow. We did enjoy ourselves but I'm still giggling about these nails. Sab, perhaps I should just have done my toes!0 -
MostlySew, I think you're right! I don't really have a bona fide case of post-rads fatigue at the moment, but I'm probably letting myself kind of flop down after holding it together these past several months. Love your Mother's Day story about your mom and your nails.
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I've had the most wonderful day today. It started with my hair dresser coming over to flat iron my hair, and she brought me flowers for Mother's Day. She also did my hair darling. Then my children sent flowers, and called, and I got to speak to all of my grandchildren. Then I went to the donut shop to have lunch with Kelly and the owner and their families. Their family was so nice, and the food was to die for. I had the best fish soup, and salad with shrimp than I've ever had plus a number of other great dishes. I am still there. when I told Kelly the good deal I got on tee's and blouses in a store in the mall, and she wants to go to. I am waiting for her to clean up, and then we are going to the mall. OMG Kelly is only 32, and she wants to be friends with me. I love it, and I loved my Mother's Day
xoxo,
Kate
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That's beautiful Kate! You get what you give--you are giving people love and positivity and you are getting it right back!
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Kate, I think everyone wants to be friends with you, including all of us on this thread. What a wonderful day you had, and so glad you told us about it.
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RunFree - Just wanted you to know I got a cold two weeks after I finished rads too. Took a month to go away and they had me on antibiotics.
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Lemon, I read your post last night but was just too tired to respond.I know that's a lousy excuse.I just tend to read but not respond on those bad fatigue days.I'm sorry.I hope you find some relief.I'm with RunFree I'm kind of worried about the SE' s of tamoxifen .I have' t started it yet either.I told my Surgeon that the other day he said its a no brainer.He said if you don't take it and you get more cancer down the road you'll kick yourself.
Kate I am all happy you enjoyed your day.
My day started with coffee and breakfast I ate on the front porch in the sun.Pancakes and bacon good stuff!!
Then church and we all went to my sister's for mothers day.I'm the youngest out of 6 and 2 of my brothers and of course my sis .My other sis lives in Connecticut .
WE ate a lot then went to my MIL house for anouther meal.Yeah I'm pretty much stuffed right now.Oh and I can't forget BDay cake for Andy and Mothers day cake from DQ
Welcome Peggy I'm sorry I don't have any experience on rec after Rads.
Hope everyone had wonderful mothers day!!I got anew cover for my kindle that. Props up.It's actually made for I Pad mini but it fits my Kindle.0 -
Bunkie, that's majorly helpful data. Wonder what it means. I hope mine doesn't last a month or need antibiotics, yikes! That's awful.
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Kelly took photos of me today in my new skirt. I may have to wait till tomorrow till she emails them to me, and then I will post. Foot very bad again tonight. We went to the mall at 6 and I walked on it too much. Right now I am back at the donut shop, and Kelly is going to bring me some more fish soup, and salad for a late dinner. Then I will go home and hang my foot over the sofa. I have a 30 minute chemo treatment tomorrow, and then I am off until June 3. Yeah!
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Lemon, I started typing a response to you last night and I was so tired, I gapped out and forgot to send it. I had similar feelings when I finished rads. I just didn't know what to do with my life. We find ourselves running against the wind and then the wind stops. We don't trust it, and we wonder when the next thing will happen to rock our worlds. All that we knew and trusted has changed, and now we have to find a new normal. I woke up every day thinking about breast cancer first thing, and trying to figure out how I was going to get through my rads. When it was all finished, it was anti-climactic in many ways. I am 18 months out now from finishing rads. I don't think of bc every morning first thing. Life is beginning to make sense again, and I am getting a sense of where I want to go from here. I will say my thyroid had petered out almost completely right after rads. I was depleted and depressed and I didn't feel like doing anything. My primary care doc started testing my thyroid and vitamind d and also did a CBC which didn't look great. My lab had always been perfect. She started upping my doses of thyroid hormone and vitamin D. I am now in balance, and my thyroid is in much better shape. Once she started increasing my dosages, I started feeling better. I still have my down days and some anxiety, but for the most part life is improving. I am not thrilled about follow up appointments, but I think all of it is pretty normal.
Pretty toes SAB. Kate, I would love to see a pic of you all done up for the day. My granddaughter came over today and she and my DH and I went to The Great Gatsby and out for dinner. It has been a weekend of various family groupings and today was just the perfect day for me.
It sounds like a lot of us had a nice day. We deserve it, don't we??
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Sew love your story of brunch with your mom. I think your green nails are lovely!! I have already chipped my gold flecked polish, so I am considering another color.
RunFree sorry about your cold. Get into the sun and soak up that vitamin D. It will help you heal faster. Do you have a fever, or could it maybe be allergies. They are at the bottom of lots of nasal complaints this time of year.
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Hey everyone, finally caught up on reading. I went on vacation for a week and missed alot on this thread. I won't comment on everything. I just hope we all had some enjoyable moments today.
I have been off the AI for 3 weeks now. I feel so much better. My hands are still stiff and slightly puffy, but my knees and hips are so much better.I have more energy and feel like I can enjoy life again. I don't have that deep bone pain anymore.
I had a great time in Mexico with my DD. I haven't laughed so hard since dx. we went zip lining, rappeling into cenotes, snorkeling. I really wasn't sure I was going to be able to handle it, but I had the best time. It's been a little over a year from rads for me.
My DD and I got mani, pedis while there, but I got a pale pink like usual. I still get startled by my hands. Who's are those vieny, wrinkily hands with polish on them!
((((hugs to all)))
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Where did the week end go??
I tried to catch up but you've filled so many pages....we're over 5,000 posts now on this thread!I still have two entire pages unread.
Gigi, glad you are up late but sorry it's hard to sleep. I have the problem of not being able to just lie down and sleep....I have to be exhausted and get in bed just before I crash. Otherwise I lie there and think of awful things. I have a lot of fears that have developed after seeing those I love having health problems.Run Free, I am not surprised you got "mixed reviews" on your personalized health care story. We had a BC survivor teaching 3rd gradde and one day she just took off her wig in front of her stuents. I sometimes find myself telling students individually about BC, but they are young adults. I think younger kids want teachers to not be human...
Janis, glad you are feeling a little bit more energetic.
About Idol--I agree that the producers were steering Kree to go home...including her "goodbye" song which was assigned. I will not miss Angie at all. She was shocked, it seemed. Any of the top 3 will have a shot at making an album. It remains to be seen how long they will be known. I do not mind Nicki at all. I think she's kind of funny and sincere. It doesn't matter to me who wins. I like them both. The country vote is exceedingly strong. I wouldn't be surprised to see Kree win.
I'm up grading the last stack of papers....finals tomorrow and Wednesday evening.Happy mother's day to all....hope you had a good day. I did, and am grateful.
HugsJoan
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Me
at the donut shop today. Look closely and you will notice my swollen foot0
