Radiation recovery
Comments
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Just stopping in. Will catch up later. OMG this is going to be harder than I thought. I woke up 3 times last night and my chest was pounding, everything hurt. Even my teeth and scalp hurt. If I thought I could get up out of the tub I would run a nice hot bath. It took me 20 minutes this morning to focus, get out of bed and brush my teeth. I did get up though.
I am going to ask for Kate's Warrior Coat for a few days. Send me some wine, cupcakes, food...food...food. Where is the booze at??? Oh yeah in my dungeon of a basement. Guess I will have to mask up and go down there to get some Kahlua and vodka. Can I pour that over some ice creme? OK now I am just being silly. Everyone knows you can not put the booze over the ice creme. You drink a sip and THEN put the ice creme in your mouth.
It is raining AGAIN....so I do not have to water the flowers. I just keep saying "I can do this". Just proves my point that this is one strong medicine they have left me on too long. They can bite me.... I am coming down off this stuff if I can.
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Josie,
I'm glad you've made your decision. You just don't need the stress as you say. you've been thru a LOT this year already, you're still recovering from BC and rads and your health is so important. Let the young kids do the stress work. Let us older, wiser women know that there's more to life than running ourselves ragged. Not to mention your family is so important, and how would you have the energy left for them? Perhaps your manager was scowling yesterday because she/he knew the job they were offering you was not at all a good deal. Maybe the manager was already mad at the company for combining the staff in such a way that no one will be able to withstand the pressure of these new position's they've created? I prefer to think that was the reason for the scowl, not your performance. so.....go with you gut girl, there's a better situation waiting for you......
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Wow, Bunkie....tough stuff. Watch out for depression too....once you've gotten some of it out of your system. that used to happen to my brother, although with him they did the slug it hard for a short time and then months coming right back off it. That's Calif. for you!
So warrior coat, and I'm thinking short shorts and bra/breast plate too coming up. We need to really fit you out. Amazon or Viking warrior girl. Steel breastplate, although gold is prettier, it's not quite so strong. Oh, and the ice cream? It goes OVER the rum: rum in glass. and a lovely scoop of ice cream on top. Vodka too, but perhaps you should just put that in your orange juice this morning since you're up and moving.
Good luck, girl........we're behind you
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Janis good luck with your procedure. Let us know when your pocket party can begin. Of course I will bring the wine. Josie so sorry you are having so much aggravation with your job.
Two more days and I will get some answers from my MO. I especially want to know if I do the partial bladder surgery will the tumor grow back. Of course I also want to know his reasoning for wanting me to do 6 months of chemo. The main question really is what happens to my lung nodule and cancerous lymph nodes when chemo is stopped. In case I am depressed about what he has to say Tracy ( my doctor friend) and I are going to a mexican restaurant Friday night. Good margaritas and chips and quac can cure almost everything.
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Hi y'all
Janis - we are in your pocket (((squeeze)))...praying this works and you have relief
Jose - sleepless night seems to have eloped you get perspective on job issues...praying for that right door to open...you can do all our bone scans:). Better hump day:)
Kate - happy you are feeling good ...busy girl with lots of fun pans...go girl:)
Joan - walk down to the beach ad take a refreshing pump up Grammie nap so your are ready! You are a fun gram:)
SAB - how the chauffeur ...ha ha luv the fresh organic veggies yummm:) did dd meet her summer goal?
Sew - got my games and pom poms! Your uniform has Zumba tassels so bump it:) my girls can't shimmy yet lol! We gotta move...all those cakeballs and SABs appetizers ...move it!
Ohio - did you get some answers on your eyes...wink:)
Sciencegal - rad free Ooo who:)
Bunkie - (((hugs))) that the reduction is going well...
GiGil - how's Cole? Kiddos coming to grams?
Tonight will be our 1st dance lesson...oh my! Hoping hubby will hang in there! Hot TX Swing dance Friday...hoping we will be able to 2-step non-stop through a dance...oh with out counting slow slow quick quick!
Hugs to everyone...this thread us so busy hard to keep up!
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Hi All!
I haven't been here in a while. But I LOVE you all and I LOVE the idea of a WARRIOR COAT! Attitude, Baby! I think I'd like several: Viking, Amazon, Asian, Space, Blue Fairy Warrior Coat, etc.!
I just lost my insurance because I elected -without some test showing that I needed them- not to take AI's -although I did think it was an open conversation if any bad estrogens showed up. I am like Dame Side Affects, so going a natural route on AI's is -so far so good- working in my case and no side affects. But the insurance and gov are run by the drug companies. They don't like you if you don't take them. So I got kicked out of "primary cancer treatment" into "monitoring," which my insurance won't pay for and no one else will affordably insure me until "affordable (hopefully) health care" kicks in. So it's cancel a bundle of appointments for me and out of pocket for what I bare bones need (ultrasound and minimum dr appts.).
However, from another angle, I wonder if this is my graduation?
Anyone here, having two year out rib or breast scar tissue pain recurrences? I had been considering that a fat transfer might help the scar tissue since it grows in the breast as new breast stem cells.
Maybe I need a Warrior Girl graduation cap too? Perhaps a cone shaped one!
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Geez I think I have a bad bug bite. Has anyone ever had a bug bite on their arm that was painful and swollen? I am not sure if this is a bug bite or what it is
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truebff, so good to hear from you.
Yes, two years out and I have pain in the scar tissue - mainly when touched...like bad black and blue marks...and today I have a little "knot' on the side far from BC area that is very painful to touch...but I suppose I shouldn't worry as I had a clear mammo last month. (???)
I am shocked about the insurance company's policy on AIs. That never occurred to me. How would they even know that someone getting the Rx for AIs is taking the pills? Sounds ridiculous to me. Have you checked some of the AI threads? Is this common? Is it legal?
I'll be in the pocket party...with sandy toes...can bring some Dove Bars or Chipwich Ice Cream Sandwiches that they sell at the beach...
Bunkie, is there anything that will suppress the SEs you are having without adding more issues to your recovery? I hope you have a better day.....
I have not tried the rum with ice cream, but it is not on my list....Kate, we are with you during the wait. I know you'd rather not be walking this path right now....glad you have plans for some comfort food.
Josie, now that you have explained the responsibility and workload that the MA job entails, I believe you are thinking clearly. It does make sense to risk your well being for the same pay as the job you know. And, as Sew wisely mentioned, you are still in recovery both physically and emotionally.
When I read the threads today, I realized that there are many warriors on the front lines fighting battles right now. Just know you are not alone...
Gigi, thinking of you and family today....
Wishing everyone here finds some peaceful moments in this day.Hugs,
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Thank you all for being here for me today. It means so much. Kate, I can't tell you how much I appreciate you bringing the wine! I so hope your appointment with the MO goes well. I hope you get all the answers you need so you can make decisions easily. Love, luck, and hugs to you.
Josie, I am so sorry about the job. It is such a mess. Thanks for the good wishes, it wouldn't be a pocket party without you cheering! Hugs Sweetie.
Sew thanks so much for all your kind words, thoughts, everything. You are such a sweetheart. I can't tell you how sorry I am to hear about your SIL. This poor woman has been through far too much. I know what a wonderful support you will be for her during this frightening time. Please keep us posted.
Bunkie, I am so sorry you are feeling this awful. Enough is enough girlfriend! This transition has just got to get easier for you. Lots of healing hugs your way.
Joan, you are always a source of strength for me. Your posts make me smile. I am happy you are going with me this afternoon. I am leaving in half an hour.
I take all of you with me today. Kate, feel free to get the party going anytime!
Love and big hugs to all.
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Kate - do you have LE? Could it be cellulitis? I'd call the doctor or go to ER. Cellulitis isn't pretty.
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Hi Truebff, Long time no see....good to hear from you. You, my girl, not only get a warrior coat, but also a Helmet. With a spike on top! It wards off any bad vibes headed your way. You'll rock this "monitoring" mode. Insurance issue sounds strange, I can see that "monitoring" makes verbal sense, but I can't see that it means you don't get to see doctors and be monitored. Strange.
I think your rib and scar tissue sensations could be from tightness of the muscles (those we still have left anyway). Generally I'm not sore to the touch, but do know that I tighten up constantly, then ribs hurt and boob hurts etc. if I don't start stretching again. I've also found (alas thru recent experiences) that stress will cause those unidentified sharp pains in the poor old boob. They now seem to be "calm down or else" statements by my body as opposed to the "what have you done to me" statements this boob made while healing. Does that make sense?
Let us know how you're doing without the AI's......
(((Janis))))) Kate...the party's already going, now that we have Bunkie out of bed.....come on in, we're ready for wine
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Sew - If your brother was on this stuff you know how bad it is. 5 years is a long time for a drug that is not supposed to be used for life. They have nothing else to fight these inflammation diseases with and steroids do wonders when you use them the right way. I actually like the hit and run type treatment better than the tap and stay.
Truebff - That sucks that they took your insurance. You are close to great medical care at U of M.
Joan - Unfortunately there are no meds to help the withdrawal. I can take some pain meds but nothing helps the other SEs.
Janis - Thanks for the support considering what you have going on. I just know if I don't try I will be stuck on this drug forever.
I had a friend come by today and she said I was really pale and so I am staying in bed the rest of the day. This too shall pass. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
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Hey, Has anyone heard from April?? Hope she's ok I miss her.
Janis hope you did ok today but it's getting pretty crowded in that pocket of yours.Ouch somebody just elbowed me!!0 -
Truebff, nice to see you. First, yes on the pain and tightness. I also stretch constantly--yoga is my best friend. It just sucks about the insurance. It seems to me that we should be able to accept or reject treatment without this outcome. It never even occurred to me that they could do that! What alternatives are you using?
Bunkie, feel better. Instead of a pocket party for you we'll let you sleep and then have a rousing party as the symptoms subside. I hope it doesn't take long...you are being very brave indeed. Do you have any idea when to expect to feel better?
Joan, I think you should plan for some quiet, restful activities with the kids so that you are ready for the start of the semester. Board games? Writing short stories? Gentle walks in the park? I hope it goes well and doesn't tax you too much. You haven't had too much vacation time on your vacation!
Josie, good for you, making a choice that will free you to look for another, more fulfilling job where they value your contributions.
I'm sorry I forget who asked...my dd is chipping away at her summer goals, but has a long way to go. The camp counseling is taking up massive amounts of time, but will end up fulfilling her community service requirement. She is still working on her academic subjects, and it will be a close thing. I have made a very difficult decision with dh--I am going to allow dd to fail, if that's what it comes to. If it means more time in high school or starting at a jr. college instead of a 4 year then that's probably what she needs. I am encouraging her to make a plan, organize and work hard (and making snacks,) but I will not get otherwise involved. Right now she seems determined, and I hope that lasts.
I'm pooped out from running around, my house is a disaster and I can't seem to get anything done. I will be very happy when my road warrior stint is done. I need a magic coat too--nothing pretty like Kate's--maybe a bomber jacket and some of those aviator goggles and leather hat.
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Sab, that is one very tough decision to make about your DD, and I applaud you for being able to make it. It's decisions like those that generally are the best things we can do for our children, and the very hardest to make. When she succeeds she'll feel so good about herself and her confidence will soar because its something she has accomplished on her own. Let us know how it goes.....
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Boy was the pocket party wonderful. So many yummy snacks and great wine. Josie, so sorry you got jabbed in the crowd. As long as it wasn't in the boob you should be okay.
The procedure was really painful but I made it. I am supposed to take it very easy for 48 hours, and no exercise for a week. We are leaving very early tomorrow morning, probably before 5:00. The doctor was not thrilled I am going as he thinks I will be very sore, but I am going. I have pain meds and am not driving so all should be well.
Thanks everyone, just wanted to let everyone know I am okay!
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Janis,
I had to read back to see where you are headed....finally....so glad you will get to CO - Conifer...it will be a wonderful change of scenery for you. And you are way overdue for a face to face visit!
In a previous post, when I mentioned about your father's "choice" what I meant was that in the legal realm, it would appear that he is making his own choice. I know there is much more going on there...and I am sorry that you have to accept what you cannot change.
Have a speedy recovery and a very safe trip.SAB, thanks for your wisdom and advice...I learned today that I may only have my older grandson who is so easy to please. He caught his first fish today and sent me a pic. We can do more fishing/crabbing. His sister is at horse camp (she is 7) and begged to stay another week...
I agree with Sew about your decision - so hard to do, but it is a noble plan.Just wondering...how are the AI newbies doing?
It's late...more soon!
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Truebff so glad to hear from you. I have been wondering how you were doing. I have passed the 2 year mark as well. Coincidentally I had some real breast and armpit pain today. The first in a long time. I wondered if I had slept wrong or wore something that irritated things. I changed into a softer top, applied some aspercreme and it helped.
BUNKIE, don't they call that drink a Black Russian or something? Very tasty if I remember correctly. I requested and got a Pina Colada made by my DH yesterday. It was very good. I don't usually drink much, except for the occasional beer with pizza. Hope your symptoms subside soon. It is going to take your adrenals time to adjust.
Josie, wise decision. You need to do what is best for you. Time to think about what you want to do with your life.
Joan, enjoy that grandson. It sounds like a more laid back time, which is good since you have to face getting back to work soon.
Janis, glad your ablation is in the past and you can relax and heal with a great trip.
SEW, I love your pocket parties. Hot chocolate is one of my specialties. Chocolate in general falls into my area of expertise.
SAB, you inspire me to cook better. Anyone doing the 5:2 diet? I am thinking of giving it a try. By the way tough love is the best approach. Sometimes it hurts more to sit back and let natural consequences take their course.
Cole got his pins out today. It all went very well. I am so grateful. He still has to stay off the leg - no weight bearing for a few more weeks. Poor guy can hardly stand anymore anyway, but it is important for his spine and lungs to get him upright some. We celebrated with a special sushi/tempura dinner at the Mall of America. After that we shopped at the Disney store, LEGO store, and had a little fun at the amusement park. We were all in a celebrating mood. That poor little family has had a lot of strife lately. I am so relieved for them. My dad however, is failing. I wanted to get away this weekend, but my sister who usually spends a lot of time with him needs the weekend off. I will have to hang in there for a few more days. I am feeling the need for a vacation. DH is heading to Canada next week for his annual fishing trip. I want to go away somewhere. DD and grandkids and I were going to take a vacation. I wonder if we still can with Cole still all rigged up. Maybe a cabin at the lake?
Cindy hope you enjoyed that dance lesson. That sounds like a lot of fun. I was in the dance group in high school and college. I love to dance - all kinds.
Good night ladies. BUNKIE, I have you are comfy and sleeping. You too Janis. Kate, you are in my prayers as usual. Hugs to you. Waiting to hear what you find out.
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Bunkie, just want you to know I'm thinking of you. Please do not hesitate to complain--we all know you're feeling miserable, and there's just no way around it, other than giving in, and we know you don't want to do that. If you are anything like me, complaining will make you feel so much better!
Janis, so glad the procedure is in the past. Hope the trip is a delight.
SAB, yes, sometimes we just have to acknowledge that they need the training wheels off, at least for a while. Steps backward? Steps forward? Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference. Your brilliant daughter, like all of us, will learn from her mistakes and be a stronger and better woman for it. I know it hurts.
Josie, sounds like staying put for the time being is the absolutely right decision. Sourpuss managers don't deserve you.
Truebff, how about a visit with a lymphedema therapist? She can loosen up that scar tissue and maybe take away the discomfort completely. I just went and, boy, that stuff is so much more moveable and less restrictive!
Kate, sounds like a really lousy bug! If it's near your infusion site, maybe you want to take a little stroll over there and have the nice nurse take a look at it. Otherwise, I imagine your onc will be happy to take a look at it. And best of luck tomorrow. I know it's hard to ask the questions, but you are so brave and strong, I know you'll be glad you did. And then, of course, there will be margaritas!
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Good morning everyone. Just a moment of calm before hitting the road. I just want to thank you for your kind words and support, I am really touched and very grateful for you all.
(((Gigi))) I'm sorry to hear about your Dad. This is such a tough time for your family. I hope that you do get to someplace restful soon to recharge. I haven't heard of that diet. What is it?
Hey Kate--it's almost Friday. Are you going to go party? I hope the bug bite is just a bug bite, but it never hurts to get it checked!
Senior pictures this morning, then to camp this afternoon (I will try to sneak off to gym for a while) so here goes another freeway funday!
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Gigi, I know that real need to get away....I have it too but somehow the energy is missing.
I wonder if you could get away with the kids...it would be good for all of you. I am glad that Cole has passed this milestone in his recovery. I have a grandson Cole as well ... he will be 10 in Dec.
So sorry about your dad...it must be so difficult for you and your family.
SAB, road warrior, I like the aviator look for you...keep your flaps down
Am a little sad (on top of previous sad) because someone who helped me during my dx and tx has had a recurrence...small but requires surgery. She had bmx first time; but I think it is a node.
She is not sure about tx yet.
Also a friend's daughter (40 yr), who was in ICU and nursing home for 2 months after a fall, has now been readmitted with a rare disease that causes skin to die due to calcium vascular blockage. I have researched...the parents are oblivious. I cannot bring myself to tell them about the poor survival rate; am expecting the docs to tell them if she takes a bad turn. I did encourage a 2nd opinion from a NYC hospital....she is getting IV treatment at a medical center which may help the skin but not sure about the vascular. There is no medical recommendation; just a few cases where this med helped. Some people trust all docs 100% and do not ask questions. They sit there waiting for her rash to go away, but the skin is dead and not regenerating. Prayers needed.I did not sleep much last night.
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Hi All! I LOVE the spiked helmet! Thanks. It rocks!
Well, in retrospect, I could have lied and tossed out the AI's but I didn't and I wouldn't. Not my style. I did think I was having an open conversation and that I had a choice. Politics should not be part of medicine. Unfortunately, it is.
I haven't been here in a while and love the welcome party! Thanks so very much all!!
But GiGi, what's going on with your family? It sounds like someone was hurt? I hope it has improved.You lost your Mom? I'm soooo sorry. Hugs and well wishes. Hoping you are well. I think of you so often. We've had such heartfelt talks. Feel you can reach out to me anytime, PM or e-mail!
By the way, group, I am, as we speak, printing out the preview copies of one of my earlier novels that I spent the last six months editing (for the eleventh time). (I wrote this novel about seven years ago, edited it a lot, put it away, and this year, brought it out for a complete fresh edit again.) (Editing is a bear!) These copies are going out to my awesome writing group for their edits and we are going to have a bookclub discussion on it in four weeks after they have had time to read it. It's a fantasy, actually a Great Lakes fairytale about finding magic in life and involves an out-of-control Lake Superior watergod, magic on the northern coast, rock 'n' roll, and fresh water mermaids in the Great Lakes! Oh My! Anyway, I had a ball writing it and am hoping my group will give it the thumbs up for trying to find a publisher at some point. Either way, I am psyched getting to share it at last with more than my (very well read and awesome editor advisor on the novel) husband who has been championing my writing as well as my art and is my all around best guy on every level!
Everyone, think of me wearing my spiked helmet and giving out awesome good vibes out of it to all you here and on and into the universe too!
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Joan so sorry about your friend's daughter. Gigil so glad Cole's procedure went well. Janis glad you are ok. Where are you going? Did I miss something? Bunkie I hope you are feeling better.
My arm is still swollen from bug bite. Will have my MO look at it tomorrow. I am praying he will let me stop chemo now, and at least postpone the two more months of chemo he wants me to have. My hair has thinned from the chemo and I do not want it thinner. I would rather give my hair a 6 month break and then do two more months of chemo.
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truebff, i remember we talked about your art many moons ago...hope you are still creating. the books sounds great...as a non-fiction lover, I don't know how you'd come up with such ideas!!! Happy sharing...
Kate, so sorry you are dealing with the arm...I am very sensitive to bites and even sun, so I always have something going on on my arms...but you have to keep monitoring that. I know you don't want to continue chemo, but what are the chances you will get a sanctioned break as you hope? I have not had chemo, so I won't even say 'it's better to get it over with' because I think I would feel just as you do.... Thinking of you...
Had a call from my friend and they said their DD is feeling better today. I am happy for them but if the dx is what they told me, there are internal issues and serious risk of infection....patient is in a shared room...I told them to ask about that.....I hope they are right and I am worrying for nothing.
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I am sharing a post from the thread "Can We Have a Forum For Older Women with BC" offered by Illinois Lady.
I think there is something for almost everyone here, but I thought of SAB right away when I read it.
On Letting Go -- author unknownTo "let go" does not mean to stop caring. It means I can't do it for someone else.
To "let go" is not to cut myself off. It's the realization that I can't control another.
To "let go" is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To "let go" is not to try to change or blame another. It's to make the most of myself.
To "let go" is not to care for, but to care about.
To "let go" is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To "let go" is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.
To "let go" is not to be in the middle, arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own destinies.
To "let go" is not to deny, but to accept.
To "let go" is not to nag, scold, or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
To "let go" is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.
To "let go" is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
To "let go" is to fear less and to love more.
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Joan - I can relate to the sick friend thing. That is awful. Seems like so many of these rare diseases are popping up. Hopefully they can find something that will help.
Sab - I slept like a rock last night and today was no better but I covered my bed with magazines and found some good movies. Been in bed all day almost. One of my doctors said to give it till next week and if I do not get nauseated I may get past it. If not go back up and start agin. 5mgs one day and 4.5 the next for 2 weeks. It is not my disease but my darned adrenals that are stalling. Have fun on your trip.
Kate - I am hanging in there. Sounds like the break might do you good. I had a spider bit on my arm once and it took weeks to heal. It never itched just hurt.
Gigil - Glad Cole is on the mend some. Now about your dad. I hope he will be ok. It is so hard to watch that happen. See if you can take a mini vac for the week end.
Joan - I like that "letting go."
Brookside - Thanks for the good thoughts. It will be ok I think. I am hanging in there. I think my body and mind are getting used to the withdrawl. I fell today but caught myself. Turned around too fast in the kitchen. I have to be careful.
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Good evening everyone.Had kind of a lousy day.I will get to it later but first....
Gigil I'm so glad Cole is being such a brave soldier.
You guys should go somewhere.My sister takes her family to this lake in New Hamphire I think .It's right across from this Teddy bear factory.You know those really expensive bears I forget what their called.
Joan, sorry to hear about your friends daughter.That's terrible.
Kate I hope your arm is better.
Bunkie ((((hugs)))
SAB Don't be so hard on yourself your doing great give yourself some credit...And don't worry about the house..it's not going anywhere ..housework is never finished.You should see my house.
Janis hope your recovering well.(((hugs)))
Hope I didn't forget anyone.
Ok now, I had a almost panic attack today.Very nervous all day.I sometimes feel like faint or shakey right after taking my tamoxifen.I really don't feel it is the meds but my nerves.It's in the morning before I leave for work.I literally swallow it and leave for work.I was nauseous and felt faint all the way to work.I'm not going to let the stress at work make my panic attacks come back.I was kind of nervous because I didn't tell my boss I needed to take off a little later today for my DD(both)doctor appt for their asthma.They were cool with it but I worried until I left for appt.
The doctor was just 3 floors down from my office.So DD met me there with my DD younger.
DH thought it would be easier for me while he took DS
To the HS to get his locker and schedule.
When I returned 1+ hours later I felt guilty for getting back late.No one said a word.Then I find out they let the file room girl go with 1 day notice and they offer that MA position to the receptionist who has no experience as an MA.Really ?? Can you believe they didn't think I could handle it but they think she can?? WHATEVER!!0 -
Of course DD decided to test my parenting skills.But I won this battle.She wanted a sleepover tonight and I said no she continued to beg and cry real tears thinking I would cave in and let her.I didn't budge and she finally gave up after about 1 hour.
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Josie, good for you to stand your ground with DD. that's the only way to curb that attitude thing kids can pull. My daughter was the pout master supreme! You know, I wonder if this manager isn't trying to sabatoge this whole reshuffle. I still prefer to think they are trying to protect you, whom they like and don't let it show, over someone who's probably not qualified but at least they aren't harming her health by giving her such a stressful job. And I do think this new position is dangerous to the health, by the sounds of it.
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Bunkie, I like your approach...no expectations, just lots of rest...and hope to get through this week. I wish you well and hope you don't have to go back up on the dose.
Josie, there is just no logic to your workplace at all. They will be wishing you were in that job. Meanwhile, try not to let the people there throw you off center. You know what's important and you know your priorities. Use that as a positive...don't take on their negativity if you can avoid it. I wish you peace in all the things you do.
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