Any October 2011 Surgeries out there want to wait together?
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ah2bthin... Thanks for your sympathies... It is going to be a long week. I think I will be alright. I spent a lot of time looking at pictures to get myself ready... But when it is me, and not the pics, there will be a finality of loss that I just can't prepare for. I can't wrap my head around just how profoundly I will feel it... So, the preparing, ultra-control freak that I am will have to sit back and let go of being ready and simply wait. I will share the experience to the extent that I can when it happens...
I can say this. I have been experiencing a profound sadness in a way that I did not expect. In the hospital, before the snb, they injected the dye. They anesthetized the breast, but the third and deepest injection was still really painful. I felt a searing pain. Later, all I could think was that the last thing my breast felt in life was a horrible searing pain and I burst into tears. I realized more profoundly at that moment that I was really mourning my breast as if I'd lost a person in my life.
I know I will move on from the loss, and that it will all be okay. But it is definitely a time of mourning for me.
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Hi all, feeling pretty spaced out waiting for Wednesday to turn up.... only capable of playing games it appears ....will log in tomorrow! Good luck to all post and pre ops!
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CLC-Big Hugs to you! Thank you for sharing your feelings. I don't think I will mourn the loss of the breast but am anticipating looking horrific. So I guess anything short of that I will be pleasantly relieved, right??? I guess none of us know how we will feel until the time comes. You are wise to have a good idea in anticipation however. Often times our anticipation is more pessamistic than the reality, so let's hope that the outcome is not as bad as we are anticipating!
Maria_Malta-I am there with you about feeling spaced out! I have this nervous-anxious energy that I am not sure what to do with. I want to do everything only to be immediately followed by wanting to do nothing! Our surgeries are on the same day.....good luck with getting to Wednesday! And good luck with your surgery!
Dawn
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ah2bthin...are you doing recon? are you having umx or bmx?
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Judy67- my expanders were pretty tolerable until the last fills when they really felt full and hard like a coconut bra under the muscle.Then i started having muscle pain.
I have read lots of posts here where people had no problem at all with them. It just takes some getting used to. Once your skin recovers a bit from the trauma of the mx it does feel a bit better.
Hope your sleep schedule normalizes; being up in the middle of the night is the worst!
Ginger
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CLC-- I have taken one look at my chest, but I haven't had the nerve to study it in the mirror yet. We took pre surgery pics and tomorrow we will take 1 week post pics. I plan to post on the picture forum. I found that site so helpful so I want to add my pics to hopefully help others.
Those having surgery this week I hope your experience is like mine. I can't not remember anything from when my DH and BF hugged me before going to surgery to when they wheeled me into my hospital room after surgery. I was also lucky that my BS does the dye injection after I was under.
Ginger-- my PS has told me that dealing with the TE is the not fun but tolerable.
Hugs to all of you today.0 -
kelleyod and slgarcia - Today is the day to find the strength, faith, and courage that's within both of you ...
Sending out HUGE virtual hugs, along with positive thoughts and energy for both of you ... you know that we're all praying for you ...
And, to all this week's ladies - BE courageous, HAVE faith, GO forward! ~Edison
Love~Peace~Joy
Trinity
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Thanks for the warm welcome ladies. I feel like I won't ever get to know all of you, there are lots of lovely ladies on here (and one DH, it seems) and I'll never get caught up. I'll do my best though.
Best to everyone having their surgery in the next few days. Stay strong and heal quickly!!
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Ginger - I had a bmx with TEs on Oct 3rd, and I'm still wondering if I'll ever get used to the feeling of 1,000 pounds sitting on my chest ... MargieC described the feeling as "an elephant sitting on her chest" (quite an appropriate analogy) LOL ... yes, it's kinda painful for me, and hoping and praying it gets better in time for all of us ...
CLC - just checking in with you to see how you're doing ... I read that you had a minor setback with the compression bandage ... perhaps, taking "baby steps" will make it easier to handle ... I don't know if you recall my post about looking in the mirror for the first time ... it's not easy, but you'll get through it, just as I did ... and, I didn't think I had the strength to get through any of this, til I had to, and I found out how strong I actually was ... <<<HUGS>>>
Trinity
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CLC-I am having unimx now and delayed mx on other side and recon at same time. Not my initial plan which I why I think this is going to be hard. I wanted to have TE's placed with BMX but BS said that would not be best option for me with needing radiation and having skin involvement with larger tumor. So, now I will be faced with delayed recon and a uniboob until that time. If there is one thing I have learned it is that I am not in control of this and it does no good to have a plan. I keep telling myself that LIVING is what is important NOT how I look, scars, boobs, etc. Still struggling though!
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trinity...Of course I remember... Thank you for your encouragement...
ah2bthin...I am sorry it isn't going as per your plan... I feel the control is a little like surfing. You are on a wave and you ride it...some semblance of control, but sometimes the waves just catch you and you crash. Then, you get back on the surfboard...and ride the next wave. But...I think surfing is probably a hell of a lot more fun...
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Will some of you pros give me more info on the drains? This is one of the many things that I am concerned about. I'm having BMX with immediate recon on Oct. 28.
Post chemo MRI was not great, only showed a 10% decrease in tumor size, but the PET scan showed no activity, so surgery is still on schedule.
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Solange, Onc said that he would have liked for the tumor to have decreased more, but that PET showed no activity so he was pleased. He did however say that he was anxious to have surgery and get this cancer out. I have developed a "knot" under my arm, but with PET being negative, he thinks it is probably scar tissue from the SNB.
I hope all is well with you,
denise
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Hello from moffitt cancer center ..... Injection done for snb ....ugh! 6 of them and I wish I were under but wasn't unbearable ...... Pics done of that .... And now we wait .....again or should I say still??! Nice to be able to check in with y'all while I wait with ol' DH ...... Ready to get on with the fight and then dreading it the same!
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Kelleyod...good to hear from you...you keep going! You'll be in recovery before you know it!!
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deniseday...I am no pro...just living with drains for 3 days now. They are way easier than I imagined, just an annoying appendage and some daily care. I am keeping mine in a fanny pack. I thought I was going to use a post-op camisole with pockets for the drains, but I can't take off my compression bandage, so fanny pack it is. I empty them twice a day...and it is easy. I am a little nervous about infection so a little neurotic about the handwashing and stuff. They are a little challenging for sleeping, keeping them out of the way, but the fanny pack is doing the trick.
I am fortunate to have had a umx, so I only have two drains, both on one side. It may be a bit more challenging to manage 6, 3 on each side. If I were doing that, I might want two small fanny packs... I am not sure.
I hope this helps...
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CLC-- I have taken one look at my chest, but I haven't had the nerve to study it in the mirror yet. We took pre surgery pics and tomorrow we will take 1 week post pics. I plan to post on the picture forum. I found that site so helpful so I want to add my pics to hopefully help others.
Those having surgery this week I hope your experience is like mine. I can't not remember anything from when my DH and BF hugged me before going to surgery to when they wheeled me into my hospital room after surgery. I was also lucky that my BS does the dye injection after I was under.
Ginger-- my PS has told me that dealing with the TE is the not fun but tolerable.
Hugs to all of you today.0 -
Deniseday, the drains, for most, are just annoying. They are easy to manage i.e. Dump, measure etc. The number you have seems to vary and I haven't figured out the formula for that yet. I had a bmx with immediate 1one step reconstruction and had only 1 drain on each side. I couldn't shower with them and they came out after 10 days. Some women are allowed to shower with them and have them removed sooner or later than I did. How much fluid you put out determines that. I preferred to wear a camisole with drain pockets even with heavy bandaging on my chest. I liked having the bulbs and tubing close to my body. As in all things bc, we are very different! Best wishes. Caryn
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Hello all, I am having an AND on the 19th. The scariest part of it for me is the drain. I am SO squeamish! I wonder if anybody here (or anywhere) ever fainted when dealing with their drains?! I almost fainted twice just looking at my bandage from the core biopsy (the wound had started to bleed).
Caryn, I think you replied to my whining about the drain in another thread.
I just talked to the surgery nurse and she explained a little bit about it, said it'll probably be in for 7-10 days, depending on fluid output. She asked what about it made me queasy. My answer is, what part of it wouldn't make somebody queasy?! lol
I'm going to make sure there's a chair in the bathroom so I can sit down in case I feel faint!
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Etherize, I'm not squeamish at all so I had no problems with my drains. However, given your history with feeling faint looking at blood, I would definitely say sit down when dealing with the drains, since the drains are draining blood, of course. I don't know how to tell you to get over being squeamish. Do you have anyone else who could handle them for you? You really only have to empty them usually twice a day, unless you have tons of output. At least that was the case for me.
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Caryn and CLC, where do you get these camisole with drain pockets you are talking about. I'm planning on going shopping tomorrow for some post surgery needs.
Thanks, denise
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Well I took a long look at my chest it looks ok. The surgeon thinks it looks great and it does look better then most pics I have seen but I will say it is emotional.
I just got the best call. My BS just called to let us know that the 4 nodes she removed are clean!!!! I had IDC and dcis in my left breast which we knew - the neo adjuvent Chemo shrunk the IDC to next to nothing. They removed all the tissue and I have clean margins. The right side was clean so I can now say there is no cancer in my body. I just have to heal, get my fills, do my exchange and 5 months of herceptin
Now I am hoping the PS will remove a drain or two this afternoon when I see him.0 -
Hi, all! Could I please be added to the list? BMX with SNB (no recon) scheduled for 10/20/11. I always try to prepare for everything in advance since I'm single and have to go it (whatever the current "it" may be) alone so I'm making my lists and checking them twice (without the fun reward of a visit from Santa) and I'm just now starting to freak out at the reality of it all. BS says "You can't do this alone! You have to have someone there with you!" That just makes me want to scream and say,"Dude! (no disrespect intended). Don't tell me what I can't do. I've gotten through everything just fine alone in the past and I'll get through this too!!!" Anybody else hearing the theme song from "Rocky" playing in the background?
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MargieC- that is great news. Congrats on being cancer free!
Etherize and Deniseday- I am not very squeamish. I just did not like having something hanging out of my side. I had NSBMX on 6/22. The first two drains came out in a week and the second two were out at the two week mark. I found that using button down pajamas or shirts worked best. each drain has a little tag on it with a safety pin and I just pinned them on the inside of the shirt i was wearing. Sometimes I pinned them more on the sides and sometimes I pinned them closer to the front. It depended on what felt comfortable for what I was doing. The nurse at Mass General showed us how to hold the tube right by my side and with the other hand use an alcohol wipe to strip it down into a cup. You have to be sure to resqueeze the bulb when you are done emptying so it will continue to drain. My Dh did them in the beginning but I was able to take over pretty quickly and do it myself.
I was able to shower right away because the incisions were covered with tegaderm which is a lot like clear contact paper. Each PS seems to have a different philosophy on showering.I shared our showering technique and use of a shoelace for drains in an earlier post. I think if you click my name you can find it. Otherwise let me know and I will repost.
Kelleyrod- hang in there. you will be through it soon.
MargieC and Trinity- my expanders will come out on10/27 and I am sooo ready to move on to whateve adventure is thrown my way next.
Hang in there ladies; I am going outside to enjoy some of this beautiful CT weather. Then off to accupuncture.
Ginger
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deniseday... i got mine at the following website.
http://www.womanspersonalhealth.com/amoena-mastectomy-camisole
A friend of mine recommended the ones at the tlc site (google tlc american cancer society).
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Yeah, MargieC!!! I am so glad to hear your good news!!
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etherize and mckenzie, welcome to the club... you have found a very supportive group..
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3 days from surgery and doing okay. The pain meds made me really sick to my stomach so I had to convince the Dr's to let me leave yesterday. then I stopped taking the meds last night so after 3 days of no food at least today I have an appetite and can eat. The doctor did call me in something milder which my husband is out with the baby picking up now.
Hubby and I took a quick look this morning. not as awful as I thought and I just kept telling myself that... scars fade and a year from now this won't look too bad.
Helps that they really filled my TE's up (300cc's and mine have a 500cc limit!). Between the swelling and that I have some big bruised lumps on my chest :-)
Good luck to everyone this week. It's not easy but there are always worse things.
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Thank you Ginger48 and CLC. I am going to check this website right now. Ginger48, you were a big help and I may contact you again. If I understand correctly I will be able to pin the drains on the inside of a shirt and be fairly inconspicuous. I originally planned on visiting my daughter at college 2 weeks postop and this sounds like it might be doable.
Way to go MargieC!!! I can't wait to hear those words.
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About the Drains - I know every PS does things differently. I have two drains, one on each side. I was able to shower the day after my surgery. Used Lanyards to hold the drains while showering at PS's advice - works great. I was hoping to have mine out today but he said definitely Thursday. He said it's usually 10 days. The camisole with pockets works great. I have two, one that zips up the front and one that I just step into and pull up. I got them from two different nurse navigators. Where I live, there is a hospital that services all of Tarrant county no matter which healthcare providers you use and the nurse navigator was the best one yet in explaining everything from the cancer to the drains. She is also a stage III long time survivor herself and sends out weekly emails to everyone on her list. I also had a nurse navigator at the hospital that I actually used. Most hospitals have them now so call your facility and see if you can make an appointment. They have a lot of resources to help.
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