February 2012 Chemo
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Msbelle, his as long you wake up! LOL and Galena, really cute pic. It looks good!
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Msbell
You brave girl for shaving. I still haven't. The sparse bit I have is in a ponytail which is quite hilarious looking, like if a baby had a ponytail. I had to go out a couple of times today so I threw on a baseball hate. Hate to admit it but I went to a grocery store a little farther away than normal. Just didn't feel like running into anyone and answering any questions. It is weird losing your hair!!!
Moonflwr912
You crack me up girl, hang on to that sense of humour of yours!!! Geez when I saw your numbers I now really understand why you ended up getting a tranfusion, holy cow!!!
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Sleeping cap stayed on. No hairs on pillow this morning which was nice.I did wake up a few times to make sure it was still on. Not brave enough to go to Church this morning and I have to decide what to wear for therapy tomorrow. Hat or wig??? Life can change so quickly. Never imagined these decisions would consume my mind months ago.
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I took my wigs back to the wig shop and had them thinned. They were way to poofy for me. Now I feel better wearing them. Gotta say the mark up on the wigs in shops for cancer.patients is crazy.
Been a couple of better days. The cold is almost gone and been on the steroids so energy. Today I'll start crashing. But at least I'm sleeping better at night.
Moonflwr, glad you're doing better. Galena, you look.fabulous0 -
gritgirl
You are so right about the mark up at the cancer wig shops! The one in the hospital where I'm being treated I thought were outragous. Where I had originally found one I liked, was way too puffy too, and it ended up it was on backorder. The one I found that I actually liked was a 1/4 of the price at a shop more geared to fashion vs cancer patients. Just a bit to long so my hairdresser is going to trim it for me tomorrow morning. I'll post a pic when I get back.
Glad the cold is easing off. My last steroids were taken yesterday but I actually got lke 6 hours of sleep last night which was heaven. Clocks went ahead this morning too and its supposed to get to 15C today! I'm watching the squirells chase eachother around and the birds are out singing!
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ok now i have to something to b*&%V about!!!! i just took the dog out- when i go out i have been wrapping my winter scarf around my wig cap cuz it really looks nasty in "public" and i put my winter coat on--nobody told me it is freaking gorgeous out so there i am dressed like nanuck of the north!
now-here's my b*&%V--i want a porch or a deck so i can sit and enjoy!!!!!! read !!! coffee!!!!! nap !!!! whatever...
ok- resume what you were doing..................
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LOL lumps! Resuming...... LOL
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Lumpyneme
Its nice out but I don't know about napping outside LOL! You'll find somewhere to live don't worry. But bitch away girl! I'm resuming to cook lunch and get out for a wee walk before I likely crash tommorrow for a couple of days if last time is any indication. Just going to through a ball cap on and go. Looking forward to the extra daylight now, always gives me more energy!
Moon
How are you feeling today?
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Day 15: Good morning all!
Most of my head hair is holding on strong, but my pubic hair is definitely shedding. Otherwise the SE's have been minimal over the last couple of days.
Cutting my hair felt really fun and empowering. My long locks came off on my terms, -not- because chemo stole them. I am digging my short 'do, but I do cover up in public. I am actually reconsidering getting a wig. The one I ordered has come into the shop, but I have found scarves really fun to wear. I think I could really rock the bald look. Or maybe I'll buy a bright pink or purple one, have some fun with it.
I'm thinking of planting some bulbs this week so that I'll have a lot of Spring blooms. They should be flowering around the time I finish my chemo course. I'm looking forward to that sense of winter / chemo being over, and seeing and experiencing new beginnings, renewal.
FLDREAMER- I view this breast cancer stuff as a physical and emotional journey. There is nobody I like to travel with more than my husband, and I can understand that it could feel like a very long and lonely journey by yourself.
Having said that, he cannot completely understand what's going on with me. In that regard, I actually find this forum provides a lot of the companionship I need to travel through the land of cancer diagnoses, surgery and treatments.
I know we can't hold your hand and give you real hugs, but I hope you know you're not alone here. I hope you're feeling happier today. (((((hugs)))))Firstcall- Thanks for the explanations. I'll have to check out my blood test results next time.
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hi i start chemo this week and I am nervous but excited because atlease i know we are attacking this dumb cancer.
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hi i start chemo this week and I am nervous but excited because atlease i know we are attacking this dumb cancer.
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Hi darnette
Welcome to the club no one really wanted to join! Personally while nervous too I was glad to get underway, it kind of took the mystery out of everything and showed me that if I can do this, I can do anything.
How many and what kind of treatment are you having?
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Anyone having trouble with ankle edema? I'm Calling doctor tomorrow. Anticipate having to add another medication to get rid of this extra fluid! I have gone from no meds to a basket full.
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msbelle- watch the salt in your diet. the meds can make you more prone to fluid retention, but salt adds to it. Especially the hidden salt. If you have to open a can or package to get to it, it likely has a lot of salt in it.
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Welcome Darnette. Waiting is hard we all know. Hang in there. I feel pretty good today, but still running a low grade fever. I will have to call doc tomorrow. My nephrologist suggested a sleep study, as my blood pressure issues started after my BMX and if sleep apnea is the problem, he thinks I wouldn't need meds. Strange, but never had BP problems before that so worth looking into, especially since it was the BP med that added to the renal failure, learn something new every day.to all, much love, small SEs
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Hi - I just wanted to reach out to you ladies who are just starting the process - I'm two years from chemo and I totally understand your fears and anxiety. I remember thinking that I was going to be unable to function during chemo, be really sick, or worse, just not make it through. But, in reality, I managed quite well - did all my normal tasks - just needed more naps. Be sure to drink lots of water prior to and during all of your chemo - I swear that this is what helped me. Also, stool softeners were a must for me. Biotene mouth rinse was another necessity. Don't eat acidic food - tomatoes were my worst enemy. Try to exercise - easier said than done, but even a walk every day is so very cathartic. Hair loss came at about day seventeen after first chemo - sucked but I now have a full head of thicker than ever hair. If you get wigs, get them trimmed by a professional - they look weird, if you don't. I am always here for any questions - I know our group of ladies for February 2010 starting chemo on this site really helped each other through. I can't say enough about reaching out in this group. It saved me emotionally so many times. So, bigs hugs to all of you - drink water and you too will look back in a couple of years and think, wow, I can't believe that was actually real! Mo
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Thanks, MO, it helps to know there is a good end to this tx. Thanks for the hope.
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Thank you for that Mo!! That helps ALOT!! Just went to refill my water glass and take my SS's LOL!! These I have learned already are a must. BTW my nickname is Mo too!!
I shall remember to do the same to those going through things at this stage as well in due course.
Cheers
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I'm back. And I have "hope" again. I've felt such despair lately that I am thankful I was blessed with a wonderful 'normal' weekend. I had a long lunch with an old friend Saturday (including margaritas). Then out for ice cream with daughter #2 and granddaughter.
And on Sunday, I had a nice country drive with daughter #1 that was pet related and held no unpleasant conversation, just a lovely day.
Our weather was beautiful and I took all the outside cushions out of the storage shed and put them on the lawn furniture on my covered patio. And I took my bike out of storage and locked it up on the patio. Need to put air in the tires and possibly tune it up a bit.
I felt so normal. Next Thursday is AC #4 so I'm sure next weekend won't be like this. But at least I can go out to the patio and sit outside and watch the birds and squirrels.
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I am so thankful for the friendship on this forum. I appreciate all the empathy, understanding and encouragement. All of you are better than any of my Facebook friends who, although well meaning, still say all the wrong things. (don't need to tell you what they say!)
LumpynMe: Thanks for the sharing about your spouse. I know I shouldn't ever settle and I know having a partner in the house doesn't mean it's better than being alone. I wish I could give you part of my patio. It is so huge. Please don't give up in your quest for a different place to live. I was married 20 years and we lived in14 places. I've been on my own since 1984 and have lived in another 18 places. I've had places I would cry as I'd go in the door. I've never owned a house, always rented. This house is teeny tiny but has a huge yard and is private. I like that.
Moonflwr: So sorry about how sick you've been. Hope the week ahead is much better. And don't ever apologize about what you post. We all understand. That's what I love about ALL of you!
FirstCall: I loved the video. It was fantastic. So very talented. I bet it's really fun around your home when you're all able to be together and 'jam.' Thanks for sharing.
Mthrdee: Sorry you've had it so rough also. I really hope you've feeling better by now
Myleftboob: My granddaugher wants me to get a pink wig. Maybe I should come to your town. Not sure I'd be brave enough to wear it though..
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If I missed thanking anyone for being there for me, I'm sorry. All of a sudden, I'm so tired I can't keep my eyes open.
HALOS: These are the partial wigs shown in TLC catalog that you can wear under a baseball cap, etc. Has anyone tried these? Are they more comfortable than a regular wig.
PORTS: I love mine. It was put in during my MX so that was good. Blood is drawn from it and all treatment is thru it. It is a PowerPort and I appreciate having it.
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So, one of my patients is the quarterback of the local football team. He is wearing pink shoes to play in as a show of support. He emailed me a pic from his last game.
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firstcall:
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww so cool !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FLDREAMER: i'm glad that you understood the ppint of my post cuz i felt like a true bitch after i wrote it-someone who doesn't know my true character and how much i can love might think me very cruel and shallow...i won't leave him again -he needs me more than i need him ... as for the apt we are in-gosh i hate it but it's temporary ---it got us a place here when we needed to move ...i dream of myself in a small house with a yard...and i keep my pretties (that i can't put out cuz hubs breaks things by accident!) in hopes that someday i will have my own place....i guess i'm a dreamer too!!!!!......................sounds like your weekend was good for you and getting ready for the sunshine and the bike and cushions will really help you!
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this morning is AC#3......................
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Lumpynme: I'll be thinking of you today as you go thru AC#3. Hope it is uneventful and no side effects.
I so understand your situation with your ex. I was married to my high school sweetheart after dating five years. Then after a 20 year marriage, we divorced. Ten years later, he had Lou Gehrigs disease and lived with my younger daughter. We renewed our friendship and I spent lots of time visitng him and 'hanging out'. We were going to live together again. (I had never really stopped loving him.) Anyway, about six months after our renewed friendship, he died much sooner than we expected. I grieve like we were never divorced but everyone sees me as a divorcee, not a widow. I still miss him. And he was a tender and loving person when he wasn't controlling. Anyway, I never would have left him again. But on the other hand, I do like my own space and place again. Perhaps TMI for the rest of you but I felt I had to share.
Best wishes to everyone going thru treatment today.
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flddreamer - take it easy at work...and I hope all turns out well for your daughter. I gave up on wigs after a week and I just wear a halo and a hat to work now. It is (IMO) a little more comfortable feeling and normal looking than a wig, although I have never in my life worn hats before!
galena - totally unrelated, but nice pic, and wow you have great teeth!
msbelle - glad to hear your sleep cap stayed on. I am wearing a hairpiece and hat to work, and just a loose knitted cap all other times (for warmth, and so I don't feel like an alien).
gritgirl - glad you are sleeping better.
lumpynme - it's supposed to hit 70 degrees today down here in Missouri. You are welcome to come sit on my porch.
Welcome darnette, and good luck with starting treatment.
mofend - thanks for the support!
firstcall - that is so sweet!
Okay here is my grump...stomach kept me up all night. Nothing severe, just alternating pain, then nothing, queasy, then nothing, then pain, etc. etc. Took my compazine, pepto bismol, ate toast, my normal protonix this morning, and just a little while immodium since now I'm running to the toilet about every 20-30 minutes. I have my herceptin treatment this morning and if my stomach doesn't settle down I am NOT going to work today. I hate to miss work but there's no point in going if I'm going to spend more time in the bathroom than my office. Also I am really tired...got about 4 hours of sleep last night. Ugh... After treatment #1 I was starting to feel much better about 7 days later and today is 7 days after #2 so I am hopeful today ends well. Also my hair stubble is now 50% - 60% gone. I wish it would just finish falling out. Other than my stomach (for anyone who wants to know) my SEs this round have been really dry skin on my fingers, fatigue (of course)...that's really about it. I had some bone pain (random, sharp stabbing pains) from the neulesta (I assume) during the first round, but very little of it this time around.
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christina don't be surprised if i'm sitting on your porch!!!!
i am thinking maybe you should take the day off work if you can????? maybve catch up on the sleep....
flddreamer- i understand! that is why i now just call him my husband instead of trying to explain the ex thing- seems like you and i are kindred spirits here!
i feel good today but my eyes are tired-does that make sense? ya know like when you have stayed up waaay too long? maybe i need to do the artifical tears?
it's raining litely and warm...my son is on his way to pick me up......i just wanna go back to sleep!!! and i slept well last nite....tonite is supportgroup too- so if i don't go it's not again til next month-we'll see how tired i am tonite.....
hugs to all!
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I just got back from having my hairdresser shave my head. OMG I can't believe how much better it feels! I never cried either, neither did he LOL! I never realized my head was flat in the back LOL!! I wasn't sure how I would feel about it but my hair felt so dead and brushing it was making me gag by all the hair that would come out in the brush and be everywhere else for that matter.
I have my wig on trying to get used to it, although I don't know how long that will last. At least the colour is OK. Although already I want to order a halo, I can see it would be more comfy and soft on top for sure.
Lumpy, that new place will come when it's meant to. I may be moving sooner than later too. My friends daughter is really interested in my house, might be able to save a few bucks on real estate fees too! That would be great but then the push is on to find a new place sooner than later, we'll see. Take it easy after TX today, if you are too tired to go out later to your support group, just rest.
FLDREAMER
I am also gratefull for the friendship here, FB just doesn't cut it in the same way at all. I'm sorry about your husband too. I'm glad though you were able to revisit your friendship at least. Relationships are complicated.
Christina
I have the Herceptin TX the same day as TC. I can't remember which TX you"re having but to have to go back for just that? Ug, and if you're not feeling well, that doesn't help much. I am waiting for the hammer to drop from the Neulasta shot too. I'm a little stiff in the shoulders but took Clariton 24 this time around so I'm hopeful I don't get the spasms. I guess I'll know in the next couple of days.
I hope I didn't miss anyone!
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I just got my hair cut over the weekend. i can't believe with all I've been through i allowed this to stress me out, but the hairdresser was so nice with such a positive attitude, especially when she said I looked like Kris Jenner! I bought a cute pair of earrings and am embracing my new short hair ( although I'm sure it will only be around another week). I bought a cute baseball hat with the attached hair on the sides. I wasn't too happy with my wig. It was too thick and poofy. I had the hairdresser cut layers into it and angle the front. It looks alot better. We are all going through so many hurdles and need to remember that each new step we take makes us stronger. We are survivors not victims. I work with alot of women from domestic violence and that's what I always tell them. You are not a victim!!! Hope everyone has a good day.
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One of the secrateries at work just came in my office and said she has strep throat. I just zapped her with my lysol spray and she got so insulted. LOL.
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