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February 2012 Chemo

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  • moonflwr912
    moonflwr912 Member Posts: 5,938

    When I got my head shaved yesteray, the wig shop did it. The also sewed my wig to fit my head, I am flat inthe back ofy head, but the wig fits nice. I also bought the wig glue so it wouldn't ride up as I am flat back there, I must be really flat! LOL. I came.in from shopping today, and rocked the bald, It was 73 degrees today and beautiful.

  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 983

    Moonflwer

    I was telling my sister how my head's flat in the back too!!  She said our Mom must have left us lying too long when we were babies LOL!!  I can see us both, flatheads LOL!!

  • ali68
    ali68 Member Posts: 644

    So not going to worry about the reports what will be will be. I should get my second opinion in next two weeks, they have all the info now. Met a friend for lunch today not seen her since before new year. She said why are you wearing that wig it looks funny. I told her I thought it looked ok in the shop but when I got it home I didn't like it. I think I will stick to my hats I feel better with them. Went to a school meeting and a so called friend looked at me and turned away. This is the person who text me and said her classroom assistant sister has breast cancer but it's not as bad as yours. She hasn't contacted me since.

  • ali68
    ali68 Member Posts: 644

    So not going to worry about the reports what will be will be. I should get my second opinion in next two weeks, they have all the info now. Met a friend for lunch today not seen her since before new year. She said why are you wearing that wig it looks funny. I told her I thought it looked ok in the shop but when I got it home I didn't like it. I think I will stick to my hats I feel better with them. Went to a school meeting and a so called friend looked at me and turned away. This is the person who text me and said her classroom assistant sister has breast cancer but it's not as bad as yours. She hasn't contacted me since.

  • moonflwr912
    moonflwr912 Member Posts: 5,938

    Awe, Ali, that b*TCH! Forget you! Just tell her that. Or perhaps ceelo version f*ck u! I will keep you in my prayers til the report is in. MLB I rmember you wrote that, us flatheads horror stay together! They really sewed my wig together back there, it looks weird on the inside, but it looks good on my head, (my FLAT head-that is!) LOL

  • moonflwr912
    moonflwr912 Member Posts: 5,938

    I wrote have to, not horror, sometimes autocorrect chooses a fun word!

  • Mom2JJ
    Mom2JJ Member Posts: 38

    All, I just enjoyed reading a week's worth of posts. Some good news, some distressing news, but everyone seems to be hanging in there. Like several of you, I will have a treatment tomorrow, Thursday. Number 3 for me of 4 T/C. I keep telling myself that after tomorrow, almost done. Wishing everyone easy treatments tomorrow and little SEs.

  • JenH13
    JenH13 Member Posts: 155

    Hi everyone!

    I hope I get the names right but I am sorry if I dont!  Can I claim chemobrain? :)

    Judy, YAY on being halfway done.  I, like a lot of others will be getting my TX tomorrow and its #3 of 6 on TCH so I'll join you! I am trying to look on the positive on being halfway done!  Because I am HER2+ I have a ways to go but the herceptin is nothing compared to the TC.

    Moonflwr, so glad you are feeling better!  Now enough of the icky stuff you have had enough ok? you've done your time so easy going for here :)

    Ali,  I too have had my period while being on chemo. I was bummed. We have so few positives i was looking forward to that one! I am 38 so i dont think i was too close to menopause yet.  Your so called friends arent true friends.  Surround yourself with good positive people and forget those other ones.  I have found people say and do stupid stuff because they just dont get it.  I dont think I did before either but some just need to learn some tact!

    I took a calmer before my port surgery but it was super mild and honestly didnt do much for me.  I was terrified and cried when they wheeled me out of the room away from my husband and into the room.  Once I got the twilight sedation it was a breeze. I didnt feel anything and it was over before I knew it.  Recovery wasnt bad at all. I just worked myself up into a frenzy due to the unknown and being alone but it was really easy!

    ymac, i am so sorry about your son.  I am glad it sounds easy enough to treat with just some anitbiotics. I will add him and you to my prayers to help with all the stress.  I wish nothing but smooth sailing for you from here on out.. I think you have been through enough!!

    People have asked how I do it with 2 young kids.  My daughter just turned 9(yesterday :) ) and my son is 6 1/2.  But honestly, me personally, I dont know how I could not do it without my kids.  They keep me wanting to lead a normal life instead of hiding which for me is what I need the most.  I still take my daughter to her gymnastics 3 times a week and hang out with the "gym moms" We have gotten so close and they help me a lot. I go to my sons basketball games as long as I am feeling up to it and try to be a mom as much as I can.  I have a tremendous husband who helps out so much with the running around and homework and housework. I dont know how single moms do it in general, they amaze me. Its a lot of work but it gives me a huge goal to live for, stray strong and positive.  If not I am afraid I would allow myself to get too down about it as optimism hasn't been my strong point in the past. Now I have a great reason to be and it keeps me going and full of love every day!!

    I think I am going to have to bite the bullet and shave my head though.. its pretty bare on top and thinning in the back. I feel like one of those horrible older men who try to do the comb over when losing their hair. Agh! I hear a lot of you say it wasnt as bad as you thought it would be, so I hope that holds true for me too.

    Hope everyone has a wonderful evening and easy treatments tomorrow!!

    Sunbeams to all!

    Jen

  • FLDREAMER
    FLDREAMER Member Posts: 136

    Just popped in to say Hi.  I'm so tired I can't keep my eyes open.  My 4th and last AC is tomorrow.  I'll be thinking of you others who are also in the 'chair' tomorrow.  To everyone having problem SE's, I'm sorry to hear it and hope you feel better soon.

    On one hand, really glad to be done with the AC but scared of the 12 weekly Taxols that will follow soon.  I so want this journey to be over!   Take care, everyone! 

  • jap62
    jap62 Member Posts: 993

    well my hair all fell out, glad I shaved it first, it was nothing getting the stubbles out once thaey started to come out, haven't had to shave my underarms and my leg hairs came out just pulling on them, so I shaved them today, hope thats the last time in a long while I'll have to do that.  This post 2 tx has been better, have been sleeping through the night and I am not starving like last time.  I stil have to take naps in the afternoon,m but I am able to get a little done each day.  Had to go out looking for clothes today, since I ahve gained weight, found some shorts capris, slacks 1 skirt, still need tops and a blue scarf.  I hope to have the energy to make snacks tomorrow for care group, usually have the energy in the am, so thats the plan. hope all are doing better than they thought they would be.

  • JudyP
    JudyP Member Posts: 35

    JenH13, I'm her2+ also so we'll be herceptin buddies too. 

    Ali, don't let people's behavior get to you.  Sometimes people don't know what to say or do so they do nothing.  It has nothing to do with you.  Stay positive and focus on your healing.  People have said the stupidest things to me with the intention of making me feel better...I'd rather some said nothing at all!  It's amazing how much people that don't have breast cancer know all about it!

    Tired and generally not feeling great, but not unbearable.  Yesterday I had very bad heartburn early am.  I thought for a bit that it may be heart trouble, I thought if its not better in 10 minutes then wake husband and call dr.  Then a huge burp, what a relief!  Nothing like a good scare at 6:30 am! 

    Today I can feel the fabulous neulasta aches coming on, constipation for a few days, then the opposite for a few days...whee, non-stop fun!

    Judy

  • melly1462
    melly1462 Member Posts: 20

    To those in the chair today (I'm sorry I can't keep names straight):  Healing vibes sent your way and wishes for minimal SE's.

    Treatment #2 in the bag.  Soooo looking forward to Neulasta this afternoon.  NOT!!  But doing some things differently this time around, hoping I'll avoid being "disabled" for the next 7 days.  

    Again I want to thank you ladies...and gentleman for sharing your stories.  It truly helps. 

  • Jag1110
    Jag1110 Member Posts: 51

    JudyP - do you take the claritan before and after your neulesta shot for the bone pain? A lot of people say it works for some reason and can't hurt. I took it the first time and had no pain. I start 2 days before the shot and go for 7 days after. My doc said it wouldn't hurt anything, I am on the TAC tx.

  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 983

    Good Morning All

    I wanted to pass along that this is day 6 after my 2nd TX and day 5 after the Nuelasta shot.  It appears the 24 Hour Clariton may have worked.  I'm a little achey but no back spasms to report like the last time which were brutal. 

    JudyP

    I have the same issue, constipated for a couple of days and then the opposite

    Jen

    I buzzed the hair for the same reason.  While it was hanging in there, it was really starting to show the thiness on top and yes LOL a comb over was it my forseable future.  I have to say though there's still quite a bit of stubble there along with hair on my legs and still some on the nether regions too.   I'm sure TX #3 will take care of that though.

    Ali

    I think your lunch friend was trying to make an attempt at make you feel better about the hair loss in her odd way.  The one at the school though?  It is a reflection on her not you.  I think back to a couple of years ago when my neighbor/friend was going through it and while I did visit her and listen I wonder if I could have done more.  I have to admit it scared the crap out of me and it did make me uncomfortable so I know I could have done more.  She has been a huge help to me through all this, more than anyone.  While I have found most of the women in my life to be supportive, I have found that the men in my DH's life a bit less so. He has one good friend that's there no matter what, but a couple of his buddies don't come around at all, goes for his brother too, not even a phone call.  He knows too because my MIL told him.  BC is a good weeding out excersise isn't it?

  • gonegirl
    gonegirl Member Posts: 1,022

    I'm sorry to hear everyone has been having such problems.

    I've not been doing well. For 3 weeks now I've been losing my voice and been exhausted.  I've taken more and more time off work. I called my oncologist but then the nurse practitioner calls back and her only answer is for me to schlepp myself out to their 2nd location out in maryland (I live in DC and am closer to George Washington University Hospital). nurse told me she'd call back but didn't so I went to see my internist who gave me meds for gerd and nose spray (the thought about loss of voice is gerd and post nasal drip). Certainly my internist was concerned about possible ulcers caused by steroids. so now i'm on a med for that.

    this has been disheartening.  i get hit weekly with taxol and herceptin and am halfway through, thank god.  but my morale is at an all time low.  just one tiny step at a time i guess. this is exhausting.

  • gonegirl
    gonegirl Member Posts: 1,022

    btw, myleftboob, any tragedy in life is a good weeding out. found out when my mom died and then when my sister died.  i consider myself lucky in that the folks who are left for this next tragedy are the ones i know are stick to it types

  • ali68
    ali68 Member Posts: 644

    Myleftboob, thanks I know what you are saying I'm lucky I have a few very close friends who are great.



    Gritgirl, really sorry to hear this i know the more treatment we have the more tired and grumpy we will get. Can you treat yourself with little things you like and try and chill out.



    My port, was it me saying I was a coward and making lots of fuss, yes I think so. I didn't take a calmer night before and no sedative. It wasn't nice but I was strangely calm. The doc that did it was very nice and that's what put me at ease. It bloody hurts like hell now I'm home haha.

  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 983

    gritgirl

    Weekly TX has to be brutal, you never really get a recovery period! No wonder your're feeling low.  Exaustion will do that to you.  I agree with the Doc re the post nasal drip causing you to lose  your voice.  Happened to me a couple of years ago.  Had a super sore throat and could barely speak.  Thought it was strep, it wasn't it was a sinus infection that caused it.

    Ali

    Glad the port procedure went OK. It will help in the long run

  • gonegirl
    gonegirl Member Posts: 1,022

    MLB, it's unclear whether this has been a cold and the chemo laying me low or just the chemo laying me low. I'm hoping it was a cold. But it's been going on for weeks now.  Ali, I would love to do something special, if only I could get up off my couch. Sigh. Hopefully, the meds will help.

    The nurse practitioner actually suggested taking a week break from chemo, to which my response was hellza no.  i don't want this ugly cancer to get even a bit of a foothold back in there. so i'll deal with this, i'll sleep if i need to, i'll learn sign language as a friend suggested.  i want this crap out of me and i want to live.  i read the boards for metastatic cancer and so many are dealing with recurrences in multiple locations.  right now it's just in the liver and the taxol is kicking that back.  so i may be exhausted and voiceless, but i am getting better.  thank god and the medical community for taxol and herceptin.

  • lumpynme
    lumpynme Member Posts: 497

    gritgirl i came here today needing to vent about something and reading your posts just makes me more humbled- i will vent seperately cuz i need to tho!

    WHy do they insist that you schlepp to another location? do they not realize that your couch or bed is where you are and that you do not have  your own private jet? sorry- i just get mad at this kindof stuff....

    i agree that the weekly tx is knocking you harder than  many of us yet i agree with your philosphy to get it the hellza out!

    i don't remember if you have ever told us what your job is? or includes? are you ok on the amt of days off still ???

    anyhow-here's an ohio hug!

  • lumpynme
    lumpynme Member Posts: 497

    ok now i have to vent an di dunno where else to put this so please humor me

    pre dx; i was a fulltime student and wokring a part time job tho full days (just not the perks of full time). when we moved, i obviously moved to get my tx started and that is still my main focus- i plan to eventually go back to school and you all know that i am working hard at getting that job started ASAP! 

    so- i went online and requested a deferrment or forebearance for my student loans which will start being payable in june if i am not back to school ( and i highly think it will be fall before i am ready to go thru all of that again tho i miss the heck out of it!) --i pled hardship--and today i was DENIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   wtf????????????????????????????????????????????

    i am unemployed and cannot get unemployment compensation i have almost zilcho for income right now and i have breast cancer---wtf?????????????????????????????????????

    i'm NOT done with this!

    ok- thx for listening!

  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 983

    Lumpynme

    Can you appeal???  I swear in my next life I'm coming back as a government worker.  That's just nuts!!

    gritgirl

    Hang in there hun.  I don't blame you for wanting to kick the crap out of this and not take a break. Hope those meds kick in soon!

  • ali68
    ali68 Member Posts: 644

    Gritgirl, I asked my onco if I should delay a week and she said no way and I'm stage 3 also very aggressive cancer. She said get it done as soon as possible because you never know if the cancer will start coming back. Also they may be a time when we can't do the chemo because we are I'll or something else. I spoke to an old lady who had bowel cancer at the hospital today she had a port put in. She must have been late 60's and she said when they told her she had bowel cancer she told them ok, when do we start. She told me not to be down because chemo was so good now she had every hope of getting better. Her chemo lasts for 9 months, what a fab lady she was.

  • faithhopenluv
    faithhopenluv Member Posts: 154

    Lumpynme - you should be able to appeal. Have you looked into a deferment? You may qualify based on economic hardship. That would be even better because your interest would not be accruing on any subsidized loans. I was a financial aid officer a long time ago.



    I just finished AC #4 this morning, I'm halfway thru w 4 Taxols to go. I feel so bad and guilty when I read a lot of your posts. I'm so sorry that many are having such a hard time, I have a couple off days and some stange throat/digestion things, but I'm really doing ok. I wish I could take on a few of your bad days and give you some good ones.

  • moonflwr912
    moonflwr912 Member Posts: 5,938

    Grit girl, as I sit in chemo, i am praying for you. kick it girl!  Kick it.  Lumpy, I hope you can appeal.. maybe you have to talk even just one class- might be worth a try. To all in the chair today, much love and small SEs.

  • gonegirl
    gonegirl Member Posts: 1,022

    lumpynme, i deferred my loan for a while myself due to unemployment. it's just a bureaucracy. give 'em a call and ask them what was missed on the form or whatever. it's always about missing a line somewhere i found, or how to say it.  oooooonnnnne big bureaucracy and so frustrating.  sheesh. they should just make things easier for us cancer patients, don't you think?

  • Hildy910
    Hildy910 Member Posts: 227

    Gritgirl,  that sucks--this is such a freaking ongoing crucible and every week--yeesh.  I tend to lose my voice several times a year b/c I talk so darn much--kids think it's like a holiday, but it's such a pain in the butt not to be able to communicate. 
    Like FaithhopenLuv,  I wish I could tote a few SEs for you guys--I'm doing pretty well after AC#4 on Monday, just the normal gassy/burpy/heartburn stuff. 
    But that could also be because my mother just came down and cooked us dinner. I felt guilty that my 80-year-old mom was taking care of me instead of vice versa, but life is funny sometimes.
    Lumpy, that has to be a mixup. There is no way that you should be denied.
    Good luck to tomorrow's treatment ladies, and I hope those of you who went in today are all snuggled down and relatively comfortable.  
  • Msbelle
    Msbelle Member Posts: 160

    Praying for all of you with difficulties this week! Hope next week is better! I had a good chemo #2 day. Will take advantage of my time. I expect day 3 to set in with those bad SE. Thanks to all for the love and thoughts and support today while in the chair. Hope the rest of you did as well!

  • Gayle56
    Gayle56 Member Posts: 111

    Gritgirl - hang in there - your body needs to rest to keep up the fight.

    Lumpynme - hope you get your student loan problem sorted out. 

     I have been very tired in the evening so I have been reading but not much energy to comment.  I haven't been feeling too bad this week, aside from the exhaustion, so I can't complain.  Next Tuesday is the last T/C so I am enjoying this week since I know next week will not be a picnic but it   is the last one so I will deal with whatever happens.

     My thoughts and prayers are with everyone.

    Gayle

  • ymac16
    ymac16 Member Posts: 85

    Gayle, congrats on being close to the finish line, despite all the yucky stuff that will accompany it!



    Moonflwr, hope your tx went well today! Good to hear that things went well for others today.



    I had #3 today and it went off without a hitch - it actually seemed to be quicker than the first 2 so that was a plus. The SEs so far a similar, tired and queasy but this time around I feel so much more tired. I came home and slept on and off for about 3 hours and still feel like I haven't slept in days. Hopefully, that was because of the steroids and now that it's worn off, I'm hoping to sleep well tonight.



    BTW, my darling son is doing well - the antibiotics work quickly so his knee pain has subsided. He's such a good natured kid and has been dealing with it so well. It seems to have actually hit me harder than it has him! Hopefully, the good trend will continue.



    With that I'm off to never never land! Hope things get better for those of you dealing with bad SEs and that they keep going relatively well for everyone else.