The Hermit Club
Comments
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Hubby's boss has been pretty good, but he can also be a total jerk! We've known this since he started there. The rest of the guys in hubby's department are the boss's "golden boys". Can't wait for the day when hubby can retire. Told him as he's walking out the door of the department on his final day of work he should play Johnny Paycheck's "Take This Job and Shove It"
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Mommy- oh yes, I know the golden boy world. I was once the only female working in a department of all golden boys. I was never happier than to leave that job. There is tons of favortism in the professional world.
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Yep. Just found out from hubby when he called me to tell me he's on his way home, that I could have kept the appointment today. His boss never answered the email, but usually when he doesn't it means that its fine with him. Hubby didn't find this out until just before he left for the day!
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Mommy almost over. N hopeboss doesnt get it n need ride or family members either
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Yeah, that would certainly teach him a lesson
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I never worry about people who are not empathetic to others situations. Life will bring them their own difficult lessons and similar responses. Karma, baby!
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Jazzy girl - thanks for your message! You are so right. I am in treatment right now. I've had 12 twelve Taxols and started the AC which is awful. I have noticed that I have a hard time listening to other people complain about their lives since it seems so minor compared to this. I hate that I feel this way because it's not fair to others. I resist the urge to say, "At least it's not cancer.", but I'm thinking it.
I like what you said about selective socialization. There is a lot of drama in my life dealing with stepdaughters and especially their mom who has decided to make me her number one target. I declined a baby shower invite because I knew I was only invited as a courtesy and I have bigger things to contend with than their mom's petty and mean behavior towards me. I don't know if that was the right thing for me to do, but I just said I was too sick from chemo to attend. That part was true.
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Catlady- I think you are taking good care of yourself. I declined many things during treatment and for a long time after as I was recovering because I did not want to deal with others expectations, their drama, the whining, etc. Cancer puts you into a total place of self-preservation. I did only what I had to, and let go of the rest.
Special events like showers you can do something about later if you want. You can always send a gift later to the mom to be when you are able. That is what is should be about anyways, right?
People don't understand what is like going through treatment and how well you don't feel after short and long term. I also did not want to have to keep explaining myself. The people that care about you will understand. Everyone else is well, everyone else.
I had those thoughts too all the way through treatment. I have one friend, who has a good heart, but has never been through anything particularly hard so her complaints in life are very petty to me. When I got sick and she was droning on one time on e-mail about something stupid, I said "how about we trade problems, I will take yours and you can go through cancer treatment." She stopped doing it after that. Sometimes you just need to tell people "not helpful to me right now!"
I hope you continue to get through all you need to do. Managing others expectations of us during treatment is the part you are never prepared for. Just keep putting yourself first, as you must!
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![[]](https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-zZSrXQkp7mk/U7sRnBXqYcI/AAAAAAAAHG4/0_6V3g549-A/s533/694OY.jpg)
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Mah kittaehs say, no worries about the clowns we encounter.....0 -
Cat lady take care of u. I am invited 2 my dd2 shower, 4 child #4 dont think i am doing, his family is having it n last time they ignored me. Dd doesn't want the shower, n i am also invited 2 a shower 4 the same time with a childhoodfriends dd wigh her 1st child. Want 2 go there, no mstter what i do they will have something to say.
Big hugs
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Went to the botanical garden yesterday. Tree in bloom for you gals in need of a little spring time.....
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Teka,
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There is a chocolate and coffee festival here this weekend. I am not going, but I think if a few of you were here, you might!
http://www.chocolateandcoffeefest.com/
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beautiful beotches at the Spanish Pointe in SRQ0 -
Bippy- love it! Which one are you?
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I just read this article on FB about life after cancer. I know many of us have had our challenges to find our new normal, which is exactly what this young woman is talking about. One of the best articles I have read by someone who is wading through the post treatment world. Hope you find it helpful, I know I did....
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2015/03/16/lost-in-t...
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Thank you for that link Jazzy. Her article really touched home. I have been struggling with trying to reclaim my life from the stranglehold of cancer. Having some good days but some pretty low ones too. Lots of stuff to worry about. It's helping that Spring is around the corner.
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Great article, will follow xeni jardin
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Happy St Patrick's Day!
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Jazzy, thanks for the article link. I needed to hear those words. I have been very lazy and anxious, maybe slightly depressed, the last few days. After reading the article last night, I began thinking that I might be feeling guilty that I couldn't just put the bc behind me and not think about it anymore. This morning I woke up in a sunnier frame of mind and with more energy than I've had the last few days.
Bippy, what does SRQ stand for? ... sorry if you said and I missed it.
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Sally- I have those times too. I can have days where nothing in life feels very good. Sometimes when I have not slept well the night before, or something else sets me off. Or sometimes for no reason at all. I find too just being present with it allows it to move through it a bit better.
I have to send my sister that link too. We went through treatment together around the same time which most of you know, and she had an episode in the past month where she said "I have felt very depressed the past few days, and don't know why." I said it was probably just the PTSD I think we all have on some level from what we went through. She was coming up to her check ups then, and as we know, those are just no fun. She is through that and fine. It showed up for her unexpectedly too.
Hope everyone here is doing okay. Spring is springing out all over and all the fruit trees in splendid bloom now and more trees popping out. Spring officially begins friday. Ah choo!
I leave a week from today for the west coast for a visit with my sister for five days.
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Yay jazz spending time with fsm
Gonns snow adgain here on friday
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Hi hermits- this thread has been quiet lately, but wanted to pop in and say hi before I pop out again. Heading to the west coast to visit my sister for a few days beginning on Wed. We have some plans to have dinner in Laguna one evening, are going to see George Benson perform at the local performing arts center, and also plan a visit to the Nixon Museum, which has long been on my bucket list. I look forward to 80 degree temps and flip flops!
Here are a couple pictures of things blooming in my garden right now. The green with the purple is blooming rosemary bushes and the other is the bloom of my weeping cherry tree!
I hope everyone here has a good week and hug to those here in treatment and/or recovering from it. I will ping you with stories and photos when I return.
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Jazzy, I hope you have a wonderful trip.
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Jazzy, they look beautiful! Have a great trip!
I'm fighting a bug so have kept to my bed all day watching British sitcoms on Netflix. Feeling all hermit. My DH got me some 7up so that was nice.
Hope everyone is doing well.
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Jazzy have a wonderful time in Ca.
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Jazzy, I've been meaning to post this for you. This is my favorite coffee cup, purchased in New Orleans over ten years ago. Since I'm right handed, I always see the other side of the cup. But since my right shoulder has been messed up, I use my left hand to hold it because it's kinda heavy. So I've been looking at the other side and I think of you every time I see it.
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Mags- I LOVE IT! I actually play the alto and soprano sax so that instrument is near and dear to my hear! Thanks for sharing and it would be my favorite too.
I hope you are feeling better as you move away from treatment.
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Have a wonderful trip!
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